July 17, 2008
Eddie Izzard's Death Star Canteen in Legos
June 10, 2008
What's the future of online video? Ask a Ninja, of course!
June 2, 2008
The War on Little League
March 5, 2008
DVD-sniffing dogs!
The Hindu : National : DVD-sniffing dogs to fight movie piracy
DVD-sniffing dogs to fight movie piracyPUTRAJAYA: Malaysian authorities said on Monday they hope two specially trained dogs will help police sniff out pirated DVDs and clean up the country’s reputation as an abuser of intellectual property rights.
“The two male Labrador retound that the dogs are very useful in our operations, especially in fighting piracy,” an official said.
Paddy and Manny were donated by the MPAA. They arrived on February 18 and are still adjusting to their new handlers and the tropical weather, Mohamad Roslan said, adding that the dogs may start their work in April.
Paddy, a 2-year-old black Labrador, is from an animal shelter that rescued him from abuse. Manny, a pale-yellow one-year-old, comes from a dog breeder in northern Ireland.
The dogs are trained to sniff out a chemical used in disc production, but they cannot distinguish between real and the pirated DVDs. What they can do is point officers in their raids to hidden caches of disks.
Mohamad Roslan said authorities were taking steps to ensure their safety from angry smugglers, but declined to give any details.
Movie pirates reportedly place a bounty of $29,000 on the heads of the previous team of DVD-sniffing dogs, Lucky and Flo. — AP
December 5, 2007
Stop the Canadian DMCA, eh!
November 19, 2007
Fox "News" = Porn
FOX News Porn is a great site by director Robert Greenwald (of OutFoxed fame).
He compiled lots of nasty clips from Fox "news." Once it was up, Digg, YouTube and other sites blocked some of the content for being pornographic. Apparently, when all this stuff goes over cable, it's fine. But it's too dirty for the Internets.
November 16, 2007
'Open Source' radio is back on the 'air'
The summer is over, and so is our hiatus.
The Open Source conversation is reborn at the Watson Institute at
Brown University.
Thomas Watson of IBM fame, whoâd been Jimmy Carterâs ambassador to
Moscow, founded the Institute in 1981 to address the most urgent
global risks of the time: nuclear hazards of the Cold War. Today the
mission of the Watson Institute encompasses poverty, hunger, war and
culture. My fellowship here commits me to keep exploring and
innovating in the interactive new media â at the intersection of pod- and broad- casting where the new discourse of a global age is taking
shape.
Brown and Watson overflow with blessings for Open Source, starting
with the brilliant Rafael Vinoly building that both nestles and goads
us to think anew. Nikita Khrushchevâs son Sergei is upstairs writing,
as is the exiled Zimbabwean novelist Chenjeria Hove, and former
presidents Ricardo Lagos Escobar of Chile and Fernando Henrique
Cardoso of Brazil. Geoffrey Kirkman of the Watson Institute was
right when he told me years ago: the same swath of visiting stars that
pass through New York and Harvard come also to Brown, but here they
stay longer and they talk more. Brown students keep knocking on my
door â this new rainbow generation of âmillennials,â most of them with
digital media skills and native confidence in the expanding universe
of the Web.
Not least, my Watson fellowship and the combination of avid Brown
students and first-class recording facilities have let us cut
radically into the ânutâ cost of producing Open Source. So, not for
the first time in human history, adversity has forced us into a
precious opportunity to get lean, cheap and experimental again.
âAn American conversation with global attitudeâ could be the motto of
the revived Open Source. As always, we need your partnership here to
locate the topics, guests and angles that will keep it richly
distinctive. All we want to be, as we keep growing up, is â as many of
you suggested, and producer Mary McGrath distilled the message â âthe
best damn podcastâ on your computer or your Nano. But how long should
the conversation run? And how often? What new features do you want
on the site? How do we keep making it more interactive with âthe
people formerly known as the audienceâ and with the world beyond our
shores?
What we learned in two years on the last round is that âopen sourceâ
works as well for public conversation as well as it works for
advancing software. We announced a âconspiracy of the curious,â and
people joined it â with an unending flow of show suggestions and
witty, critical, often impassioned extensions of the on-air
conversation.
We learned also that podcasting works. The proto-blogger Dave Winer
and I claim together to have done the first podcast in human history
just a little more than four years ago. Between us, at Harvardâs
Berkman Center, we were the Neil Armstrong of the podcast moon, and
now everyoneâs going there. For good reason. Podcasting is the
cheap, democratic, speedy, listener-friendly universal means of
sharing and archiving original sound files of every kind. Can we keep
it new, or newish?
To begin, weâve fired up the podcast feed of our summer gab which went
from the Oscar Wao novelist Junot Diaz to the late John Coltrane, from
the cyber prophet William Gibson to the unheeded prophets of our
quagmire in Iraq. And there is tasty talk ahead with another of the
âglobalâ novelists, Ha Jin, on his first fiction set in America, with
âThe Warâ documentarian Ken Burns, and with the canonical critic
Harold Bloom at Yale, among many others.
Let us end by saying again: Thank you. We couldnât and wouldnât be
embarking on these Open Source conversations without the community of
you â that is, without the yeasty, resilient, generous, hungry,
faithful, world-wide community that built and sustained Open Source
from the beginning.
As always, coming and going, Emerson speaks to a great deal of what
weâre feeling. This comes from the end of his marvelous essay
âCircles.â
âNothing is secure but life, transition, the energizing spirit. No
love can be bound by oath or covenant to secure it against a higher
love. No truth so sublime but it may be trivial to-morrow in the light
of new thoughts. People wish to be settled; only as far as they are
unsettled is there any hope for them.â
Thank you for passionate, engaged, listenership and commentary these
last two years. Now let us all together keep this âcommunity of the
curiousâ alive and growing.
So send us your dreams and expectations, please, for the next ride on
Open Source and reload your podcast here: www.radioopensource.org.
In the spirit of Emerson: Onward, ever onward!
Christopher Lydon and Mary McGrath
November 6, 2007
Is this the worst example of ignorant copyright journalism in years?
Check out Publishers See a Way to Track Their Content Across the Net from NYTimes.com.
Then ask yourself some questions that the reporter did not:
1) What about fair uses?
2) What about search engine caches?
3) What about the fact that it won't work?
4) What would be the cost to free speech and commentary?
5) How would this work better than Google to track text?
6) Does it matter that the NYTimes.com would be one of the parties affected by such acts?
October 25, 2007
Tim Wu's Slate 'Lawbreaking' column on copyright infringement
American lawbreaking: Illegal immigration. - By Tim Wu - Slate Magazine
from: Tim Wu
Tolerated Use: The Copyright Problem
Posted Tuesday, Oct. 16, 2007, at 7:32 AM ET
What are the most violated laws in the United States?
Traffic laws take first place, perhaps, but your next bet should be on copyright. Every week, in various ways, you probably violate the copyright law. How? When, say, you check out old MTV videos on YouTube. Or if you, bored at work, decide to research the surprising origins of the character Grimace. Or if you make a mix CD for a friend or play DVDs at a house party. Each will lead you into a facial violation of the copyright law, and in today's world, it's almost unavoidable. But is it a bad thing?
Copyright is the nation's leading system for subsidizing the creative industries, especially film, television, and book publishing. Its total evasion can threaten the cultural health of a country—witness places like Hong Kong, where piracy has decimated what was once a booming film industry. But, like many laws, copyright has acute difficulty in adapting to rapid, real-world change. The politics of copyright policy—concentrated media companies vs. millions of disorganized consumers—simply do not lead to balanced legislative outcomes. Consequently, the copyright law only sometimes adjusts itself to new challenges in the courts or the legislature. Instead, in recent years, it is often in copyright-enforcement practice that change is happening, where tolerance of lawbreaking has become the main way copyright is adjusting to the Internet age. ...
October 24, 2007
Comcast messing with other services, including Lotus Notes!
Seth at the Electronic Frontier Foundation has been watching the way Comcast is abandoning network neutrality and screwing its Internet customers.
Apparently, collaborating on corporate platforms like Lotus Notes is a problem!
Well bowled, Comcast. Way to go after those n'erdowells.
Seth writes:
... When an ISP starts arbitrarily zapping some of the protocols that its customers use, they instantly endanger the cascade of innovation that the Internet has enabled. Before this kind of traffic jamming, anybody — huge businesses, small start-ups, college students and children in their bedrooms — could build new, innovative protocols on top of the Internet's TCP/IP platform.
If this type of conduct is allowed to continue, many innovators will have to get active assistance from an ISP in order to have their protocols allowed through the ISP's web of spoofing and forgery. Technologies like BitTorrent and Joost, which are used to distribute licensed movies and are in direct competition with Comcast's cable TV services, will be at Comcast's mercy.
It should also be remembered that in many parts of the United States, Comcast is a duopoly or even a monopoly provider of broadband Internet access. Competition might offer some protection against packet-forging ISPs, but under current market conditions, we can't depend on it.
October 22, 2007
Explaining "Everything"
This is the latest video from Michael Wesch, anthropologist at Kansas State University. He is the dude who did that really cool "Web 2.0" video.
October 20, 2007
What's going on here? A scary industry agreement over digital copyright enforcement
Apparently, the Digital Millennium Copyright Act has lost all support among the corporate copyright hoarders.
Disney, Microsoft Lead Copyright Pact
By MERISSA MARR and KEVIN J. DELANEY
October 19, 2007; Page B4
In a rare cross-industry accord, a consortium of media and Internet companies led by Walt Disney Co. and Microsoft Corp. have agreed to a set of rules they will abide by in the contentious area of posting copyright material on the Web.
Disney and Microsoft, which have been negotiating a pact for the past nine months, have pulled together a group that also includes General Electric Co.'s NBC Universal, Viacom Inc., CBS Corp., News Corp.'s Fox and MySpace units, Veoh Networks Inc. and Dailymotion SA. Notably absent is Google Inc., which had been in discussions about possibly joining the group.
The copyright holders in the group have agreed not to pursue Internet companies for infringement claims if their sites adhere to certain principles. Those principles include eliminating copyright-infringing content uploaded by users to Web sites, and blocking any infringing material before it is publicly accessible.
The pact is unusual in the number of companies involved, but the agreement isn't legally binding. It is more of a sign of trust-building among the companies, according to people familiar with the pact.
The companies have acknowledged the technology that exists today to block copyright-infringing material isn't perfect. Therefore, the pact's principles require that the companies simply make their best effort.
Thanks, Michael!
October 19, 2007
Is Net Neutrality already history?
Apparently Comcast is already blocking some Internet traffic.
The next time a telecom stooge tells us not to worry about packet discrimination, remind him that it's already messing with us.
The Internet is over, folks. It was fun.
October 18, 2007
Freedom, 1; Major League Baseball, 0
ESPN - Appeals court sides with fantasy baseball company:
ST. LOUIS -- A federal appeals court upheld a lower court ruling Tuesday that lets a fantasy baseball company use players' names and statistics without paying a licensing fee.
In a 2-1 decision, the 8th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals panel ruled that CBC Distribution and Marketing Inc. doesn't have to pay the players, even though it profits by using their names and statistics.
The Major League Baseball Players Association had argued that companies like CBC are essentially stealing money from players, who charge big fees to endorse things like tennis shoes and soft drinks. The ruling could have a broad impact on the fantasy league industry, which generates more than $1.5 billion annually from millions of participants.
If CBC had lost, the MLBPA would have gained monopoly rights over publicly available statistics and other information that is used as fodder for fantasy leagues across the country, said CBC attorney Rudy Telscher.
Telscher said the facts and figures are public information. He said it's no different from media outlets that print game tallies to draw readers and make money.
"When you're using mass information, it's protected under the First Amendment," he said.
October 10, 2007
DePalma's producer stands up for stronger fair use in film and images
October 8, 2007
RIAA pressure on universities causing major headaches, expenses
Pre-Litigation Letters Put Colleges Between a Rock and a Hard Place - Chronicle.com
Pre-Litigation Letters Put Colleges Between a Rock and a Hard Place
This week The Badger Herald, the University of Wisconsin at Madisonâs student newspaper, profiles âElizabeth,â one of the growing number of college students who have received pre-litigation notices from the Recording Industry Association of America. The piece is well worth reading: It sheds a lot of light on how the notices, which encourage students to settle file-sharing claims out of court, are putting colleges in sticky situations.
In Elizabethâs case, the university seemed to be doing everything right. In March, Wisconsin received 16 of the pre-litigation notices, each intended for a different student. Instead of just forwarding the letters to the students, campus officials convened a small meeting during which they encouraged the students to seek legal counsel (made available free through an affiliate of the universityâs law school) instead of settling quickly out of court.
According to many IT-policy experts, that was exactly what colleges should be telling their students. But Elizabeth says the advice backfired. By the time she had consulted with lawyers and decided to settle anyway, the RIAA had taken its offer of a âdiscountedâ settlement, made in the pre-litigation notices, off the table. The student says she ended up having to pay $1,000 more than if sheâd just settled right off the bat, and sheâs not thrilled about the money she lost.
âI felt like the university was trying to fight with the RIAA,â she told the Herald, âand I was what they used to fight them.â
Itâs understandable that Elizabeth feels frustrated. But for Wisconsin officials, this is precisely the sort of no-win situation that some campus administrators envisioned at the onset of the RIAAâs pre-litigation campaign. Few colleges will feel comfortable pushing students toward out-of-court settlements. But if those institutions urge students to explore all their options before settling, and the advice doesnât pan out, they run the risk of upsetting students caught in the crossfire. Now that the RIAA has made clear that its discounted settlement offers really are short-term deals, what should colleges be saying to students who receive pre-litigation letters? âBrock Read
September 28, 2007
The Amazon DRM-free music store: You can listen, but you can't mash it up
There has been a lot of positive buzz about Amazon.com MP3 Downloads. It's great to see major labels figure out that digital rights management is just plain dumb.
But here is the catch: To get a song you have to agree to a "user agreement." I don't remember any other Amazon product including such a license. The license makes you click away your first sale rights, i.e. you can't distribute the file to your sister once you are bored with it. This is not too surprising. The Copyright Office already made it clear that we should not consider first sale to be relevant for digital works. Sucks. But true.
But more alarming, the contract you click with Amazon forbids you from mashing up the music into something new or better:
And what is the deal with the "Amazon Music Downloader?" If you buy just a song, you don't need it. You can just, well, download the song. But if you buy an album you MUST install the downloader.
Why must I install this mysterious software just to download MP3s? I suspect it's a way to embed metadata on the MP3 so that it is traceable later.
Anybody know what's up with it?
September 26, 2007
My current favorite mashup
September 6, 2007
Lessig celebrates big victory in copyright case
A big victory: Golan v. Gonzales:
The 10th Circuit decided our appeal in Golan v. Gonzales today. In a unanimous vote, the Court held that the "traditional contours of copyright protection" described in Eldred as the trigger for First Amendment review extend beyond the two "traditional First Amendment safeguards" mentioned by the Court in that case. It thus remanded the case to the District Court to evaluate section 514 of the Uruguay Round Agreements Act (“URAA”) under the First Amendment, which removed material from the public domain.
This is a very big victory. The government had argued in this case, and in related cases, that the only First Amendment review of a copyright act possible was if Congress changed either fair use or erased the idea/expression dichotomy. We, by contrast, have argued consistently that in addition to those two, Eldred requires First Amendment review when Congress changes the "traditional contours of copyright protection." In Golan, the issue is a statute that removes work from the public domain. In a related case now on cert to the Supreme Court, Kahle v. Gonzales, the issue is Congress's change from an opt-in system of copyright to an opt-out system of copyright. That too, we have argued, is a change in a "traditional contour of copyright protection." Under the 10th Circuit's rule, it should merit 1st Amendment review as well.
Here is the background on the case:
Golan v. Gonzales
The CIS filed this suit on behalf of a University of Denver, Colorado conductor and others, seeking to have the CTEA and the Uruguay Round Agreements Act declared unconstitutional. The suit challenges Congress’s ability to reclassify works that have already passed into the public domain as copyrighted, thereby giving ownership back to private entities.
June 24, 2007
Is It Really Harder Than Kicking Coffee?
I drink coffee. I drink a lot of coffee. As much as five cups a day, and often three cups before noon: a cup when I get up, a cup when I'm driving to work, and a cup when I'm first at my desk checking e-mail or reading blogs. When I'm working on an article or book chapter, I drink even more. Periodically I try to quit, but I chicken out as soon as I get the headaches. It's safe to say I'm addicted to coffee. But my grandmother drank a lot of coffee too, and she lived to be ninety-three.
Besides, nobody's talking about regulating coffee. Or even forbidding it to minors, which isn't an entirely unreasonable step, given its health consequences. Certainly no one is giving it great standing for purposes of the insurance industry or the medical profession.
And yet, there is a lot of talk right now about videogame addiction as a public health issue. Recently, in "Marathon video game sessions: Is this sick?," The Los Angeles Times reports about attempts to get the AMA to declare video game addiction a psychiatric disorder, which one would assume would also lead to being listed in the APA's professional bible, The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual or DSM, with a distinctive multi-digit number to designate a specific condition.
Continue reading "Is It Really Harder Than Kicking Coffee?" »
June 21, 2007
I'm not playin' it!
June 20, 2007
Life Instructions
From here.
June 19, 2007
Photoshopping Phoucault
Why is the French poststructuralist philosopher Michel Foucault such an appealing figure to Photoshop? Why are there so many digitally altered images of him on the World Wide Web? You don't see the same phenomenon with Habermas when you do a Google image search. Is it his bald head? Is it his dour reflections on authority, subjectivity, governmentality, and the way that knowledge and authorship function as part of an intellectual police state? Even one of my UCI colleagues, Peter Krapp, can't resist posting some images of Foucault in the lolcats genre! (Here is the Wikipedia defininition of what an lolcats image is, if you have a life and so consequently don't know what an "lolcat" is.)
Given Foucault's writings on the subject of the archive, it's interesting to see this week's e-mail notice about the founding of a digital library devoted to his work, although the URL now only leads to a work in progress.
Le Centre Michel Foucault, en collaboration avec l’Institut Mémoires de l’édition contemporaine (IMEC), s’apprête à ouvrir un site Internet multilingue (français, anglais, espagnol, arabe et chinois) consacré au penseur français. Appelé Michel Foucault Archives (www.michel-foucault-archives.org), il mettra à disposition des internautes une chronologie détaillée, des dossiers d’archives inédites, une iconothèque, un index complet de l’œuvre de Michel Foucault, une bibliographie de ses publications en français et les inventaires des archives disponibles à l’IMEC ou ailleurs. En outre, le site voudrait informer en temps et en heure de tous les événements suscités par la pensée foucaldienne aussi bien en France qu’à l’étranger : colloques, journées de travail, expositions, publications, etc.
Let's wish them well and hope that they don't encounter the problems that the Derrida archive has generated among the warring factions.
June 17, 2007
June Bloom
Yesterday was Bloomsday, when enthusiasts of James Joyce's Ulysses relive the day of the fictional Leopold Bloom on the streets of Dublin. Despite the fact that this event is ripe for an alternate reality game, those who explore the urban spaces of Dublin on their commemorative pub crawls tend to observe the characters and plots of Joyce's masterwork quite reverently.
It's a good day also to remember the continuing copyright battles involving the Joyce estate and its conflicts with scholars who explore the historical record on Joyce's mentally ill daughter Lucia and free culture advocates, such as those who made "The Disney Trap: How Copyright Steals Our Stories," which protests the fact that Ulysses was once briefly in the public domain only to revert to proprietary ownership status again. As someone who was once a research assistant for a noted Joyce Scholar and who had a dissertation chair who wrote a Joyce Book, these issues are close to my heart. Fellow Southern Californian Paul Saint Amour's book length study on modernism and copyright, The Copyrwrights: Intellectual Property and the Literary Imagination is required reading on the subject.
Bloomsday was also commemorated on Dublin time on Twitter by Ian Bogost with a rendition of the "Wandering Rocks" section, which you can check out here. Bogost has some thoughts on the rhetorical character of Twitter on his blog
In the world of Web 2.0, a public sheds the chains of a tightly-controled mass media market in which individuals are converted into the "consumers" needed to purchase mass produced goods and services. In its stead, that public gets a loosly-controlled micro media market, in which individuals are converted into the "users" needed to create databases for sale to Google or Yahoo! or News Corp for $35 a head. But now the market outsources manufacture to those very "users." The workers may have had nothing to lose but their chains, but the users are lining up to link their own together. It's the new fashion; chains are the new black.
Since Twitter is a Web 2.0 application that I also loathe, I heartily recommend reading his take. It's a little more subtle than Mark Marino's Web 2.0 app GeNerAtor, and it gets at some of the fundamental issues issues about cultural labor that Siva brought out in "Me? 'Person of the Year'? No thanks."
June 13, 2007
Whodunnit
Today I received the following press release from our local copyright czar Steve Franklin, who -- in his official capacity -- actually manages to be enlightened without being a despot:
The Copyright Office has launched an interactive website aimed at middle-school children. The goal of "Taking the Mystery Out of Copyright" is to explain U.S. copyright law. The colorful and animated website includes a set of learning activities and employs a character named Detective Cop E. Wright, together with other original characters, to help bring a greater understanding of how U.S. copyright law operates.
On the scale for web materials about copyright for children, which range from the merely horrible to the absolutely execrable, Taking the Mystery out of Copyright doesn't at first look so bad. I'm not sure that I'd agree that progressively more repressive intellectual property restrictions are really "copyright milestones" on a timeline that goes back to the monks in the scriptorium, but at least it acknowledges the existence of fair use, which amazingly many so-called educational sites for kids don't.
I'm still pretty tired of anti-media media social marketing and government websites with cartoon characters being pushed on kids rather than real research materials to help K-12 students with information literacy skills and school reports Shouldn't the Library of Congress do better?.
June 10, 2007
More Trouble With Trademarks: Pork and Pork Byproducts
The National Pork Board was formed within the U.S. Department of Agriculture via the Pork Promotion, Research and Consumer Information Act of 1985. It is funded by the "Pork Checkoff" program, basically a tax placed on pork producers and importers, the constitutionality of which the Supreme Court addressed a couple of years ago. The money raised via the Pork Checkoff is used to encourage consumers to eat pork and pork facsimiles posing as pork. Oddly, the National Pork Board website is a dot org rather than a dot gov, which is rather tricksy.
In 2006, the National Pork Board purchased the rights to the trademark "The Other White Meat" from a private entity, the National Pork Producers Council, for $60 million. The valuation of this mark, and the propriety of the sale is questioned here. Once it held the trademark, the Board apparently hired a private law firm to "defend" it. In February of 2007, a lawyer representing the National Pork Board sent a cease and desist letter to a breastfeeding promotion blog called The Lactivist that offered a number of tee shirts for sale, including one that said: "Breast, the other white milk." Here is an excerpt from The Lactvist's rendition of what transpired:
... I received a letter this morning from Jennifer Daniel Collins, an attorney at Faegre & Benson that represents The National Pork Board. It stated, for the most part, that my use of the phrase "the other white milk" violates their trademark on the phrase "the other white meat." As such, they've demanded that I remove the shirt, demanded that the image of the shirt be removed from any site I know of, demanded that I destroy any shirts that exist with the logo and demand that I not at any point in the future use the phrase in a commercially
profitable way.
(Want to read ALL the demands? Download the C&D as a PDF file.)
Apparently the National Pork Board is worried that someone might come to my breastfeeding blog, check out the shirts and worry that when I say "white milk" what I really mean is "thick and juicy, straight from the
hog PORK." Come on now, be honest...were you confused? Because I sort of thought I was comparing breastmilk (which just happens to be white) with the milk of a variety of other animals (cows? goats?) that happen
to produce white milk (not kangaroos though, their milk is pink) and that often gets fed to infants INSTEAD of breast milk.
Wait, it gets better...
As best I can tell, the issue that REALLY has their panties in a wad is expressed in this quote from the cease and desist letter:
"In addition, your use of this slogan also tarnishes the good reputation of the National Pork Board's mark in light of your apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption, such as with the following slogans on your website in close proximity to the slogan "The Other White Milk." "Dairy Diva," "Nursing, Nature's Own Breast Enhancement," "Eat at Mom's, fast-fresh-from the breast," and "My Milk is the Breast."
Go back and read that again. "apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption."
Do they think I'm trying to an promote an adult breastfeeding fetish??! ...
Ultimately The Lactivist caved and took her "Other White Milk" shirt off her website store, replacing it with this one:
See also. It is clear from her description of the settlement agreement, in which she repeatedly refers to the National Pork Board as a big company, a big corporation and "big business" that she incorrectly believes that it is a private entity, rather than an arm of the federal government. As noted above, I think the Board is intentionally confusing on this point. In any event, The Lactvist's sale of tee shirts bearing the "Other White Milk" slogan was not a trademark use, so it should not have been deemed infringing, and it was a parody use that ought to be protected by the First Amendment. Trademark holders love to pretend that if they aren't aggressive about objecting to all non-permissive uses of their trademark, their trademark rights will sizzle and fry, but that is generally an inaccurate and self-serving reading of the Lanham Act. It's understandable that The Lactvist capitulated to the Board's piggish demands, given the attorneys fees that might have been required to fight them, but this will further embolden the Board to overprotect the trademark in other contexts. Someday I hope the Board gets a taste of its own byproducts, perhaps in the form of a lawsuit by Harley-Davidson.
Now that it has triumphed over a parody tee shirt, perhaps the National Pork Board will begin focus on developing a newer, more sophisticated advertising campaign, like this classy entry from Canada:
Cross posted at Prawfsblawg, where I continue to guest post just to spite the vicious trolls.
June 6, 2007
Multiple Renditions of "Smells Like Teen Spirit"
June 5, 2007
Misheard Lyrics
Pearl Jam's Yellow Ledbetter edition:
June 4, 2007
The LiabiliT
From this site:
Warning: Notwithstanding the wording of the t-shirt to the contrary, your wearing this t-shirt may not be effective in shifting legal responsibility to the management of the establishments that you patronize. Please do not sue us if you ultimately do not prevail in bringing a test case. In making this disclaimer, we are sadly engaging in a version of the liability shifting that we seek to mock with the t-shirt itself.
More information here. Via Grimmelmann at Prawsblawg.
May 31, 2007
New Photo Footage Of The Loch Ness Monster
Indian Givers
The PBS Online NewHour recently broadcast an interesting story about how issues about intellectual property, free culture, and digital libraries can intersect. "India Works to Shield Traditional Knowledge from Modern Copyrights" describes the project of scientists, archivists, activists, and translators to digitize ancient texts about health and medicine to prevent the pharmacological industry from claiming proprietary rights to knowledge from a shared cultural legacy. After hearing about attempts to patent turmeric for wound-healing and copyright certain yoga postures, Indian scholars began the Traditional Knowledge Digital Library to discourage royalty-seekers in the West. (Thanks to Kathleen Seyfarth for the link to the video.)
May 30, 2007
More From the Department of Irony
Can I point out that the webcast of this Friday's Copyright in the Digital Age: An Update is being shown to the public only through compliance with a Byzantine set of rules and regulations?
Great, I thought. It's a webcast. So I can be at UCLA for that day, as I had planned, and still see a panel discussion being shown sixty miles away at the UC Irvine Science Library. After all, it's how I'm often able to "attend" events on multiple UC campuses on the same day.
But no. I called the library to get the URL, so I'd be ready at my desktop to catch all the exciting library and information science action. Apparently they are only licensed to show the webcast on only one computer at only one designated time. Otherwise I have to shell out $395 to have my own licensed copy! Why has the sponsor of the event, the American Library Association, agreed to this preposterous policing of ostensibly public content?
May 29, 2007
"The 100th birthday of artist and feminist icon Frida Kahlo will be honored with the largest-ever exhibit of her paintings, the Museum of the Fine Arts Palace in Mexico said Tuesday."
May 19, 2007
Futuristic Food Design
The "Hands Free" Lollipop
The "Ricewine Bottle Performance," a bottle of sake with edible cork (snack) and towel label.
The "Post-it Chip," a potato chip that you can stick anywhere and remove when you want to eat it.
These and many more "edible products that are ergonomic, functional, communicative, interactive, visionary but radically contemporary and timeless" here.
May 18, 2007
Sign Language
From the Disneyland Sign Generator
May 15, 2007
Raw Deal?
The documentary "Raw Deal: A Question of Consent" is reportedly about an alleged rape of a stripper at a University of Florida fraternity house in 1999. From this website:
Raw Deal is one of the most exposing and controversial documentaries about rape and fraternity life today. Billy Corben's remarkable exposé on the contested rape of 27-year-old Lisa Gier King in Gainesville, Florida, is sure to provoke heated discussions everywhere about rape, women's rights, and male privilege.
On Friday, February 26, 1999, Delta Chi frat brothers at the University of Florida held a party at their fraternity house and hired exotic dancer Lisa Gier King to perform. The following morning, a half-naked and distraught King ran from the house, claiming that Michael Yarhaus had raper her. Her most startling allegation was that frat brother Tony Marzullo had videotaped the crime. Two days later, King herself was arrested for filing a false police report after authorities claimed the rape showed "clearly willing and consensual sex."
The community was stunned by King's arrest after it was discovered that the videotape showed Marzullo himself repeatedly addressing the camera to gleefully describe that what he was witnessing was a rape. Under pressure from the media and Campus NOW to charge the frat brothers with rape, State Attorney Rod Smith arrogantly responded by making the tape available to the public so people could "make up their own minds."
Filmmaker Billy Corben takes Smith's challenge and presents the scandalizing, sexually explicit footage alongside interviews of participants involved with the case to conduct an investigation the police never did. The result is a shocking insight on fraternity life and the politically constructed nature of "the truth."
Here's a link to the first 20 minutes of the documentary. That is all I have seen, so I can't tell you much about the film in its entirety. Even that clip is confusing and difficult to watch.
Rinsing Out The Sexism
This "collectible figurine" is on sale here:
I wouldn't buy this alternative universe version either, but it makes the point pretty well, I think. Read Amanda's post about all this at Pandagon.
Carnival of Radical Feminists
The very first Carnival of Radical Feminists is up at Women's Space/The Margins. I've agreed to host the second one, both here and at Feminist Law Professors. If you read or write something you'd like to see included in the Carnival, the submission form is here. Thanks!
May 13, 2007
Flaming Mousetrap!
May 9, 2007
World Without Oil
Are you in the game yet? Ultra-cool game designer and Sivacracy reader Jane McGonigal has created a new alternate reality game, World Without Oil, where players describe what would be their real life experiences if gas prices skyrocketed, and supplies ultimately dried up.
I think I come off pretty smug about being a carpooler in our team's opening clip, but I think I'll be cruisin' for a bruisin' -- along with my two colleagues in the computer science department -- before too long.
(Apologies for the extremely long load time. YouTube and three different editing programs seem to be thwarting my attempts to post something easily accessible with both video and sound.)
May 8, 2007
I'm Still Keeping Him In My Heart For A While
I met him very briefly when I was in college and he stopped by a record store to sign albums, yes albums, it was that long ago. He was thin and scruffy and unwashed, but also really funny. See also.
May 5, 2007
"How good jugglers become better students"
According to this article:
... Research shows the benefits of juggling can last for weeks and that it actually increases gray matter in the brain, according to Brennen physical education teachers and scientific studies.
“If you juggle in the few weeks before you take tests, it will help your scores,” physical education teacher Jan Scott told a pair of fourth-grade classes.
Students approached their juggling exercises in different fashions. Some employed broad, scissors-like arm motions; others engaged their entire bodies to propel and then catch the scarves and balls.
Yet their juggling shared a common trait: Students’ eyes shone with intensity as they tracked the flying objects.
Fourth-grader Daisha Blue exuded patience as she worked through the juggling steps listed on a large sign at the front of the gymnasium.
First, she tossed a scarf up several times from one hand, then the other. She moved into tossing the scarf up and clapping while it was in the air, to eventually using two scarves, then three, then juggling balls.
“I loosen up and let go of stress,” said Daisha, 10.
Brennen physical education teachers began teaching juggling about 10 years ago, and over time, scientific research has shown more and more educational benefits of the activity.
“The research validated what we were already doing,” Scott said.
Juggling engages both sides of the brain — which control different functions — and primes students for academic performance, said physical education teacher Susan Jordan. ...
Do you think this would work for law students, or would there be too many regrettable jokes about clowns and balls?
May 3, 2007
The Comics Curmudgeon
Cripes some of the posts here made me laugh.
May 2, 2007
10 Principles of Economics, blah blah blah
Summer Researchwear
From here.
Foul Bias
From the NYT:
An academic study of the National Basketball Association, whose playoffs continue tonight, suggests that a racial bias found in other parts of American society has existed on the basketball court as well.
A coming paper by a University of Pennsylvania professor and a Cornell University graduate student says that, during the 13 seasons from 1991 through 2004, white referees called fouls at a greater rate against black players than against white players.
Justin Wolfers, an assistant professor of business and public policy at the Wharton School, and Joseph Price, a Cornell graduate student in economics, found a corresponding bias in which black officials called fouls more frequently against white players, though that tendency was not as strong. They went on to claim that the different rates at which fouls are called “is large enough that the probability of a team winning is noticeably affected by the racial composition of the refereeing crew assigned to the game.”
N.B.A. Commissioner David Stern said in a telephone interview that the league saw a draft copy of the paper last year, and was moved to do its own study this March using its own database of foul calls, which specifies which official called which foul.
“We think our cut at the data is more powerful, more robust, and demonstrates that there is no bias,” Mr. Stern said.
Three independent experts asked by The Times to examine the Wolfers-Price paper and materials released by the N.B.A. said they considered the Wolfers-Price argument far more sound. The N.B.A. denied a request for its underlying data, even with names of officials and players removed, because it feared that the league’s confidentiality agreement with referees could be violated if the identities were determined through box scores.
The paper by Mr. Wolfers and Mr. Price has yet to undergo formal peer review before publication in an economic journal, but several prominent academic economists said it would contribute to the growing literature regarding subconscious racism in the workplace and elsewhere, such as in searches by the police.
Read the entire article here.
May 1, 2007
I Want This Doormat
Details here.
April 28, 2007
From here.
From here.
Another Plot By A Liberal Congress
Reaffirming My Vegetarianiam One YouTube Video At a Time
These octopus tentacles don't seem to realize they are dead:
April 27, 2007
"Jokes You Would Hear Over And Over Again If You Worked As An Iron Smelter"
Gettin' a little hot and heavy here, isn't it?
That's unexpected; some would even say "Ironic."
Smelt you later!
Lost your glasses on the job? Go check in the lost and Foundry!
What radio station do you listen to work...oh wait, I know...HEAVY METAL! ...
From here.
April 26, 2007
"Ordinary Indignity"
Sound familar?
Bunny Letter Opener
April 25, 2007
Company Name Etymologies Wiki
Here. Below are a few selected entries:
A&M Records — named after founders Herb Alpert and Jerry Moss.
Bridgestone — named after founder Shojiro Ishibashi. The surname Ishibashi (石橋) means "stone bridge", or "bridge of stone".
Coleco — began as the Connecticut Leather Company.
Duane Reade — named after Duane and Reade Streets in lower Manhattan, where the first store was located.
eBay — Pierre Omidyar, who had created the Auction Web trading website, had formed a web consulting concern called Echo Bay Technology Group. "Echo Bay" didn't refer to the town in Nevada, "It just sounded cool," Omidyar reportedly said. Echo Bay Mines Limited, a gold mining company, had already taken EchoBay.com, so Omidyar registered what (at the time) he thought was the second best name: eBay.com.
FCUK — French Connection United Kingdom.
Glaxo — a dried milk company set up in Bunnythorpe, New Zealand, by Joseph Edward Nathan. The company wanted to use the name "Lacto" but it was similar to some already in use. Glaxo evolved and was registered on 27 October 1906.
April 24, 2007
When Can We Put a Copyright Symbol on a Government Headstone?
In light of the government's final begrudging acceptance of Wiccans as people of established faith, I was interested to see the list of "Available Emblems of Belief for Placement on Government Headstones and Markers." I couldn't help but notice that the "Christian Scientist" and "Muslim" logo choices were "not shown because of copyrights."
April 18, 2007
Hokie Hope Friday
Virginia Tech family members and friends are uniting this Friday, April 20th to declare an "Orange and Maroon Effect" day to honor those killed on Monday. Wear orange and maroon on Friday to support the Hokie Nation.
April 16, 2007
How to paint the MONA LISA with MS PAINT
April 14, 2007
How Many Times Can You Say "Illegally" in an Anti-Piracy PSA?
April 10, 2007
I am not a Ho Either, And I'm Shopping Scarlet
I don't care if it is disloyal to my beloved Gamecocks; I'm buying some Rutgers Scarlet Knights shirts here and I'm going to wear them proudly. From this NYT story:
... Racial comments by white entertainers and degrading racial and sexual lyrics in black-dominated rap music have provoked a growing debate over the limits of expression about race in American public life.
"We need to get to the point where we don't call women hos, we don't classify African American women as 'nappy-headed hos,''' said team captain Essence Carson.
Imus made the comments last Wednesday after the Rutgers Scarlet Knights team lost the national collegiate championship game to Tennessee. ``Hos'' is slang for whores. ``Nappy-headed'' is steeped in racism and viewed as a vile slur describing African American hair.
``We have experienced racist and sexist remarks,'' Rutgers head coach C. Vivian Stringer said at a team news conference. She called the comments ``despicable'' and ``abominable'' and contrasted them with academic accomplishments and professional potential of the team members who flanked her.
"These young ladies are the best this nation has to offer,'' she said.
CBS Corp. unit CBS Radio and MSNBC, which broadcasts the ''Imus In The Morning'' show on television, suspended Imus on Monday in a rebuke for the personality whose program draws top political and media figures.
``I think it is appropriate and I'm going to try to serve it with dignity,'' Imus said in an interview with the ``Today Show'' on NBC. ``This two-week suspension is not insignificant.''
Carson said the team has not yet decided whether to accept repeated public apologies Imus has made. She added she wanted to ask Imus: ``After you meet me as a person, do you still feel that I'm a ho?'' ...
Essence Carson, you totally rock, and if you ever decide to attend law school, I hope you will consider South Carolina.
April 6, 2007
Siva!
April 5, 2007
Super Mario Brothers as Performed by the Ice Capades
Featuring an anthropomorphized computer virus. One of the weirder things I've seen in a while, and remember that I live in South Carolina!
April 4, 2007
Jane Austen Collectible Toys
These are a little weird:
Jane Austen Action Figure
Jane Austen Plush Doll
The same vender offers a Jane Austen Finger Puppet as well, but that COMPLETELY freaks me out.
As Bitch, Ph.D. noted, the NYT recently ran an article helpfully explaining that "she might have become arguably the greatest English-language novelist in history only because she was too homely to land a husband." Thank goodness law professors don't have to be hot either!
April 2, 2007
The "New Face of Maytag"
Why is the Maytag Repairperson always a middle-aged white guy? And, see also.
March 28, 2007
"US Marines prohibit large tattoos"
Here is an excerpt from this article in the BBC News:
Marines have long been banned from having racist or sexist tattoos.
But from 1 April, "sleeve" tattoos that cover most of an arm or leg will be banned, as will smaller half or quarter sleeve tattoos if they are visible on arms or legs when a Marine is wearing shorts and T-shirt.
"Tattoos or brands that are prejudicial to good order, discipline and morale, or are of a nature to bring discredit upon the Marine Corps are also prohibited," the new rules say.
Marine Corps Commandant James Conway said: "Some Marines have taken the liberty of tattooing themselves to a point that is contrary to our professional demeanour and high standards.
"I believe tattoos of an excessive nature do not represent our traditional values."
Anyone caught with fresh ink in the wrong places could face up to two years in prison. ...
Sheesh. I can only imagine what the penalty is for tattoos that infringe a copyright!
Need To Keep Liquid In Your Shoes?
It's The Dram Sandal!
Ria Cortesio: First Female MLB Ump (In A Very Long Time)?
According to this blog post:
Thursday, March 29, at about 2:00 p.m, central time, Ria Cortesio will step into position on the first base line in Phoenix, Arizona, and she will do something that no woman has done since March 1989. She will be an umpire in a game between major league teams (if you count the Chicago Cubs as a major league team).
I write because Ria is a friend of mine. She's someone that I've known since the 1990s when she was a student at Rice University, and she was working as part of the Astrodome video crew. She's been working at this for a long time, now. In Houston, she umpired high school and little league games. She's umpired in the independent leagues, she spent time in A-ball, and she's about to start her 5th year with the AA Southern League. She's been accused by George Steinbrenner of squeezing the strike zone on Roger Clemens -- this was during a Clemens rehad start in Single A ball. She also happens to be the next in line to advance to AAA.
Good luck, Ria. I'm pulling for you to make the majors. But just don't expect me to pull my punches. The umpire always sucks.
More here. Somebody better tell Keith Hernandez to take deep cleansing breaths!
March 27, 2007
Sesame Streets, Brought To You By The Letter Eff
March 26, 2007
The Camel Library
According to this site:
...the camel-borne library actually exists. It operates from Garissa in Kenya’s isolated Northeastern Province near the unstable border with Somalia. Initially launched with three camels on Oct. 14, 1996, the library now uses 12 camels traveling to four settlements per day, four days per week. The camels bring books to a semi-nomadic people who live with drought, famine and chonic poverty. The books are spread out on grass mats beneath an acacia tree, and the library patrons, often barefoot, sometimes joined by goats or donkeys, gather with great excitement to choose their books until the next visit. I visited the region and walked the bush with the camel library, and you can see pictures and a short video.
From the Department of "Everything's Bigger in Texas..."
Very large hail:
"Two Auckland schoolgirls have taken on one of the world's most powerful food and drug companies and won."
The author's use of the term "schoolgirls" in this context is a tad annoying, but I love this story:
Two Auckland schoolgirls have taken on one of the world's most powerful food and drug companies and won.
A school science experiment has led to GlaxoSmithKline being prosecuted for allegedly misleading consumers about the vitamin c content of Ribena.
Pakuranga College students Jenny Suo and Anna Devathasen say they are not sure how to answer when asked what it feels like to take down a major company.
Three years ago Suo and Devanthasen tested the vitamin c content of several popular fruit drinks in a school experiment.
"Ribena was the second lowest out of eight juices we tested and we were sure that we'd done it wrong," Devathasen says.
The girls repeated the test several times but kept getting the same result.
But when they told GlaxoSmithKline that Ribena didn't contain the vitamin c they claimed it did, the company brushed them off.
"They kind of didn't take us very seriously because we were 14 at the time...we were really little," says Suo.
The girls went to Fair Go with their information but GlaxoSmithKline said its advertising has appeared worldwide for more than a decade and all Ribena products boldly highlight the correct vitamin c content.
However Larraine Barton from the science faculty at Pakuranga College was impressed with what the students had discovered and encouraged them to take it further.
"I just thought it was amazing. I thought of all the false advertising claims, and I thought go get "em girls."
The students went to the Commerce Commission and that has led to the company being prosecuted for misleading the public about Ribena.
"If they'd sorted it out with us at the beginning, this wouldn't have happened," they said.
And despite winning a school science medal the 17-year-old whistleblowers are looking at other careers. Suo wants to get into advertising and Devathasen is interested in a law career.
GlaxoSmithKline are due to appear in court next Tuesday. They face a maximum fine of $3 million.
March 23, 2007
"Gem Sweater"
Here. By Lesile and the Lys. Previously blogged about here. Hipsters find this hilarious. At least one South Carolinian law prof, however, isn't sure she exactly gets the appeal.
Okay, this made me laugh:
March 22, 2007
You're Too Late: This Painting of Steve Jobs Holding an iPhone Sold for $410 on eBay!
From Cult of Mac, via The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs where "Steve Jobs" admits:
"I've seen some awful things in my day but this is just terrifying. Much love to the brilliant geniuses at Cult of Mac who posted an item about how this painting sold for $410 on Ebay. And yes, I know what you're wondering -- yes, the buyer was working as a front for me. No way was I going to let this thing out into the world. Children might see it, for God's sake. Plus, it looks really cool in my home office, tucked in among all the other photos and paintings of me, and the big huge mirrors that let me watch myself while I'm working."
March 20, 2007
Quidditch takes off on campuses!
Pay to Play
The Copyright Royalty Board has dramatically increased fees to websites that provide recorded music via streaming audio. Based on the argument that the potential for ad revenues could make these profitable ventures, the CRB has thus far ignored the pleas of public radio stations with large web presences, such as KCRW here in Los Angeles. See Ruth Seymour's argument for public and indie venues here and listen to a broadcast from neighboring public radio station KPCC here.
YES!!!!!
The missing boy scout was found alive! How I love a happy ending.
March 15, 2007
Mr. Deity!
Episode One:
If you found that funny, check out Episode Two, Episode Three, Episode Four, Episode Five, Episode Seven, and Episode Eight. And if you find an Episode Six, let me know!
March 14, 2007
Where Wings Take Dream
Over a year ago (in this post) I noted that in my pre-law-professor life I often worked odd jobs to make extra money. For a while I was part of a team that traveled to a series of churches and community centers to interview people about health and beauty aids on behalf of the large corporation that manufactured and marketed them. I did consumer research on the way people reacted to toothbrushes, deodorant, mouthwashes, lipstick, pain relievers, and for one ponderously long interval of time, sanitary napkins. My job was to talk women into wearing a particular brand of sanitary napkin, and then get them to agree to return the following day to answer an invasive series of questions about how wearing it made them feel, and yes, it was just as squicky as it sounds, but the women did get paid for their trouble. At first we offered twenty dollars, but got few takers. Even when the “honorarium” got boosted to $50, many women were squeamish about the idea, and it took a great deal of persuasion to get them to agree to participate, and I had a quota to meet, so I’ll always love the women who, after the honorarium was mentioned, said things like: “For fifty dollars, I’ll wear it stuck to my head for you! Even if it has wings!”
I don't know where all that market research went wrong, but sanitary napkin manufacturers do not seem to understand their customers at all. Feminist law prof Caitlin Borgmann noted recently: "My favorite always was the patronizing, “Kotex Understands,” on my panty liners – as though some big, undoubtedly male-populated profit-making corporation could really “understand” what my periods are like. Or like I would even want them to. Ick! Just give me the damn pads and stay out of it."
And for some reason "Always" is now using the slogan: "Have a Happy Period!" This is not going over too well with some consumers. Recently a friend sent me a link to this post recounting a letter to a company representative, which says in pertinent part:
... As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in capri pants. Which brings me to the reason for my letter.
Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period."
Are you f***ing kidding me?
What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness -- "actual smiling, laughing happiness" -- is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?
Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep.
Undaunted, "Always" boasts a "beinggirl" website, via which you can send "Have a Happy Period" e-cards like this:
I'm trying to picture the circumstances under which I would ever contemplate sending one of these. Or how I would react to receiving one from a student.
March 13, 2007
Common People
March 11, 2007
Jumping Jack Flash
Piracy Kills Music, brought to us by the Norwegian branch of social marketing giant McCann Ericson, known for their public service campaigns against obesity and in favor of parental screening software, delivers a literally black-and-white view of intellectual property issues.
Although the spot was chosen as a featured pick on the FWA: Favorite Website Awards, where Flash developers compete for attention, I didn't find it very user-friendly. In particular, I found the sluggish, stalling loading time extremely irritating, and I found the movement of virtual objects devoid of the charm that I often associate with more dynamic Flash sites. Certainly, the gloomy monochromatic palette didn't help any. Citing a pseudo-Frankenstein-movie -- ironically as a borrowing from Mel Brooks -- may have been kind of cool for a few seconds, but the black and white scenes didn't serve any narrative purpose in the rest of the site.
The "interactive" quizzes or activities at the end of every chapter seemed particularly unimaginative. They were generally formulated as bland information graphics that could respond to input from the user's mouse. A few of these chapter reviews contain factually incorrect statements such as the claim that it is illegal to "download music from a file-sharing network" or "share music from a file-sharing network," because the keyword "copyrighted" is missing in the assertion. Furthermore, if Neil Young makes an anti-war anthem freely available on his MySpace page, or David Byrne invites users to create mash-ups on a Creative Commons site, neither the conduct of artists nor of the music fans is illegal.
I've been thinking about the ideas in Ian Bogost's upcoming book, Persuasive Games, in which he argues that "procedural rhetoric," dictated at the level of code, has the aim of persuading the player or expressing underlying ideologies. In terms of programming, I find a simple interactive program like "Dots" much more engaging than the short interactive sections in Piracy Kills. Even more fun to play with is the new Visuwords: online graphical dictionary, which may remind digital rhetoric old-timers of the Visual Thesaurus of old.
For those who want some real interactivity that conveys a lasting message about conventions of user behavior with digital copies, one that emphasizes the importance of showing respect for the work of other people, I would recommend ccMixter's latest remix contest as a way to understand how to build symbiotic models for media production without the recording industry's heavy handed emphasis on parasitic ones.
March 6, 2007
Charlotte Perkins Gilman
A writer, economist, and lecturer, Charlotte Perkins Gilman was an early theorist of the feminist movement. According to The Charlotte Perkins Gilman Society:
Charlotte Perkins Gilman (1860-1935) was born in New England, a descendent of the prominent and influential Beecher family. Despite the affluence of her most famous ancestors, she was born into poverty. Her father abandoned the family when she was a child, and she received just four years of formal education. At an early age she vowed never to marry, hoping instead to devote her life to public service.
In 1882, however, at the age of twenty-one, she was introduced to Charles Walter Stetson (1858-1911), a Providence, Rhode Island artist, and the two were married in 1884. Charlotte Stetson became pregnant almost immediately after their marriage, gave birth to a daughter, and sunk into a deep depression that lasted for several years.
She eventually entered a sanitarium in Philadelphia to undergo the ìrest cure, a controversial treatment for nervous prostration, which forbade any type of physical activity or intellectual stimulation. After a month, she returned to her husband and child and subsequently suffered a nervous breakdown. In 1888, she left Stetson and moved with her daughter to California, where her recovery was swift.
In the early 1890s, she began writing and lecturing, and in 1892, she published the now-famous story, "The Yellow Wall-Paper." A volume of poems followed a year later. In 1898, she published her most famous book, Women and Economics. With its publication, and its subsequent translation into seven languages, Gilman earned international acclaim. In 1900, she married her first cousin, Houghton Gilman. Over the next twenty-five years, she wrote and published more than a dozen books.
Some of Gilman's works are available for free online, including The Yellow Wallpaper and Herland (or Herland or Herland!) because they are no longer in copyright. Remarkably, some of the sites hosting the texts of her public domain works dishonestly claim copyrights in the texts themselves, such as the University of Virginia. Several terrific books about Gilman have been published, including this one by my friend and University of South Carolina colleague Cynthia Davis.
March 4, 2007
Black Box Fantasies
Anybody who has read Henry Jenkins' Convergence Culture will enjoy this item from SNL that makes fun of what Jenkins calls "the Black Box Fallacy."
March 3, 2007
The Good, The Bad, and the Podcast
This is a collective intelligence request for all Sivacracy readers. I'm giving a workshop about podcasting this month to UC faculty, and I'm looking for really bad academic podcasts to play as examples for what not to do. So if you've heard particularly bad audio from a lecture, interview, or other academic performance, send me the URL. Bonus points if it involves crinkling of paper and a lot of comments off mike. And -- of course -- if you've heard a really great professorial podcast, one that was clear, engaging, and used the medium of sound for added rhetorical effect in a teaching or other pedagogical situation, send me those URLs as well.
March 2, 2007
Baseball Card Follies
According to this Yahoo Sports story:
In this undated digitally altered image provided by the Topps baseball card company President Bush smiles and waves from the stands, right, and Mickey Mantle looks on from the dugout at left, as Derek Jeter swings his bat. A spokesperson for the Topps company said that somewhere between the final proofing of the card and its printing - when it was too late to stop it - someone within the company played a joke and inserted Bush and Mantle into the photograph.
March 1, 2007
Poster Child
Julia Lupton, the supercool Shakespeare scholar and head of H.O.T. (Humanities Out There) -- which has earned lauds from both Time magazine and the National Endowment for the Humanities for its innovative programs in public schools -- is giving a talk in Southern California on March 22, "The Self Published Life: Engaging the New Democracy of Letters."
As a proud parent, I have to point out that the artwork gracing the announcement is a self-portrait my son carefully cut out from layers of old LP records.
Tycho was born the summer before I started grad school in a Critical Theory program, so he's not as wee as the other Sivacracy babies, but I think he's pretty swell nonetheless.
February 28, 2007
The Creepy Misogyny of NYT Restaurant Critic Frank Bruni
Today's NYT features a review by "Frank Bruni" of the restaurant at the Penthouse Executive club entitled: "Where Only the Salad Is Properly Dressed." He claims to like the steak there, but the entire article is a platform for his sexist comedic stylings, such as lines like this:
The men who actually wait on the tables are less attentive and personable than the women who hover around them (and, it should be noted, vanish quickly if shooed away). The prices of some dishes, pumped up to reflect the entertainment on hand, might also be called topless.
And this:
Meet Foxy. When I visited Robert’s on Valentine’s Day in a mixed-gender group (not all that unusual at the restaurant), she approached our table to hawk neck and shoulder massages, also $20 apiece.
“Foxy,” I began, then stopped myself, wondering if I was being too familiar. “Are you and I on a first-name basis, or should I address you as Ms. Foxy?”
“You can call me Dr. Foxy,” she said.
“Is that an M.D. or a Ph.D.?”
“Yes,” she answered.
The doctor coated her hands with moisturizer and, less seductively, antibacterial gel. She knows how to make a guy feel special.
The guy in question was one of my companions, whose collar she had already spread so she could get at his skin. She told us that she used to work at Scores, a disclosure that raised an interesting question. Is there a strip club arc of professional advancement, with the Hooters overachievers graduating to Scores and the Scores valedictorians to the Penthouse Executive Club?
And what’s after that? A cameo on Howard Stern’s show?
But it was in captioning the accompanying photographic slide show entitled "Two Kinds of Flesh" that Bruni reveals his true opinion of women who work at the restaurant. Here are a few examples:
Bruni caption: "SHE NEEDS A STEAK . . . OR A SWEATER A dancer at the Penthouse Executive Club."
Bruni caption: "Here's the possibly perfect meal at Robert's: a porterhouse, rare or medium-rare by the looks of it, with the fat, crunchy onion rings. Look at that meat. On the plate, I mean. You can see how nicely charred it is on the outside, how soft and red within. It takes an impressive steak to rivet a photographer's attention from the scene to the cuisine. This one succeeded."
Bruni caption: "What I really want to do is direct."
Bruni caption: "A scene from the Penthouse Executive Club, a casting call for the sequel to "Showgirls" or Britney's latest night on the town? You decide."
Yet another reason to be a vegetarian.
February 24, 2007
"Camel" Now A Girl's Brand of Cancer Stick?
According to the NYT: The next time R. J. Reynolds Tobacco asks smokers to walk a mile for a Camel, watch how many of them are in high heels.
Reynolds, eager to increase the sales of its fast-growing Camel brand among women, is introducing a variety aimed at female smokers. The new variation, Camel No. 9, has a name that evokes women’s fragrances like Chanel No. 19, as well as a song about romance, “Love Potion No. 9.”
But don’t look for a Jo Camel to join Old Joe the dromedary on Camel packages, displays or posters. Rather, Camel No. 9 signals its intended buyers with subtler cues like its colors, a hot-pink fuchsia and a minty-green teal; its slogan, “Light and luscious”; and the flowers that surround the packs in magazine ads. ...
But what does this mean for their longtime Spokesgenital?
"Big Ovaries, Baby!"
As sung by The Uppity Blues Women:
As sung by Blue Mama Black Son:
Balloon Race
February 23, 2007
From the Dept. of No, um, Kidding, Sherlock!
Flame First, Think Later: New Clues to E-Mail Misbehavior
By DANIEL GOLEMAN
Jett Lucas, a 14-year-old friend, tells me the kids in his middle school send one other a steady stream of instant messages through the day. But there’s a problem.
“Kids will say things to each other in their messages that are too embarrassing to say in person,” Jett tells me. “Then when they actually meet up, they are too shy to bring up what they said in the message. It makes things tense.”
Jett’s complaint seems to be part of a larger pattern plaguing the world of virtual communications, a problem recognized since the earliest days of the Internet: flaming, or sending a message that is taken as offensive, embarrassing or downright rude.
The hallmark of the flame is precisely what Jett lamented: thoughts expressed while sitting alone at the keyboard would be put more diplomatically — or go unmentioned — face to face.
Flaming has a technical name, the “online disinhibition effect,” which psychologists apply to the many ways people behave with less restraint in cyberspace.
In a 2004 article in the journal CyberPsychology & Behavior, John Suler, a psychologist at Rider University in Lawrenceville, N.J., suggested that several psychological factors lead to online disinhibition: the anonymity of a Web pseudonym; invisibility to others; the time lag between sending an e-mail message and getting feedback; the exaggerated sense of self from being alone; and the lack of any online authority figure. Dr. Suler notes that disinhibition can be either benign — when a shy person feels free to open up online — or toxic, as in flaming.
The emerging field of social neuroscience, the study of what goes on in the brains and bodies of two interacting people, offers clues into the neural mechanics behind flaming.
This work points to a design flaw inherent in the interface between the brain’s social circuitry and the online world. In face-to-face interaction, the brain reads a continual cascade of emotional signs and social cues, instantaneously using them to guide our next move so that the encounter goes well. Much of this social guidance occurs in circuitry centered on the orbitofrontal cortex, a center for empathy. This cortex uses that social scan to help make sure that what we do next will keep the interaction on track.
Research by Jennifer Beer, a psychologist at the University of California, Davis, finds that this face-to-face guidance system inhibits impulses for actions that would upset the other person or otherwise throw the interaction off. Neurological patients with a damaged orbitofrontal cortex lose the ability to modulate the amygdala, a source of unruly impulses; like small children, they commit mortifying social gaffes like kissing a complete stranger, blithely unaware that they are doing anything untoward.
Socially artful responses emerge largely in the neural chatter between the orbitofrontal cortex and emotional centers like the amygdala that generate impulsivity. But the cortex needs social information — a change in tone of voice, say — to know how to select and channel our impulses. And in e-mail there are no channels for voice, facial expression or other cues from the person who will receive what we say.
True, there are those cute, if somewhat lame, emoticons that cleverly arrange punctuation marks to signify an emotion. The e-mail equivalent of a mood ring, they surely lack the neural impact of an actual smile or frown. Without the raised eyebrow that signals irony, say, or the tone of voice that signals delight, the orbitofrontal cortex has little to go on. Lacking real-time cues, we can easily misread the printed words in an e-mail message, taking them the wrong way.
And if we are typing while agitated, the absence of information on how the other person is responding makes the prefrontal circuitry for discretion more likely to fail. Our emotional impulses disinhibited, we type some infelicitous message and hit “send” before a more sober second thought leads us to hit “discard.” We flame.
Flaming can be induced in some people with alarming ease. Consider an experiment, reported in 2002 in The Journal of Language and Social Psychology, in which pairs of college students — strangers — were put in separate booths to get to know each other better by exchanging messages in a simulated online chat room.
While coming and going into the lab, the students were well behaved. But the experimenter was stunned to see the messages many of the students sent. About 20 percent of the e-mail conversations immediately became outrageously lewd or simply rude.
And now, the online equivalent of road rage has joined the list of Internet dangers. Last October, in what The Times of London described as “Britain’s first ‘Web rage’ attack,” a 47-year-old Londoner was convicted of assault on a man with whom he had traded insults in a chat room. He and a friend tracked down the man and attacked him with a pickax handle and a knife.
One proposed solution to flaming is replacing typed messages with video. The assumption is that getting a message along with its emotional nuances might help us dampen the impulse to flame.
All this reminds me of a poster on the wall of classrooms I once visited in New Haven public schools. The poster, part of a program in social development that has lowered rates of violence in schools there, shows a stoplight. It says that when students feel upset, they should remember that the red light means to stop, calm down and think before they act. The yellow light prompts them to weigh a range of responses, and their consequences. The green light urges them to try the best response.
Not a bad idea. Until the day e-mail comes in video form, I may just paste one of those stoplights next to my monitor.
February 22, 2007
Sixty-Five Online Mathematics Textbooks
I probably won't be downloading any, but here, enjoy!
February 21, 2007
Vocabulary Assignment
It's almost like there is some kind of theme.
February 19, 2007
Writers' Rooms
What Passes For Funny To Conservatives
February 18, 2007
Free (and Stolen)
I've been meaning to get around to some rhetorical analysis of the recent "Thoughts on Music" by Steve Jobs. It's not actually a philosophical reflection about the aesthetics of melody and harmony, because it should more rightly be titled "Thoughts on DRM."
In Jobs' statement on DRM or "digital rights management," he argues that music publishers should give up on the invariably failing project of crippling digital content with proprietary tags designed to disable supposedly illegal play. Unfortunately for consumers, DRM creates all kinds of problems with interoperability and ties customers to a particular brand in ways totally unprecedented in the analog world. Open source critics have answered Jobs pointedly by saying that Apple should make the code of its own player software more transparent, if the company is really serious about principles of freer culture.
As a close reader, I noticed Jobs' clever use of parenthetical phrases in which he attempts to position himself on both sides of the fence in the IP culture wars. Check out this sentence:
No DRM system was ever developed for the CD, so all the music distributed on CDs can be easily uploaded to the Internet, then (illegally) downloaded and played on any computer or player.
Or this one:
The problem, of course, is that there are many smart people in the world, some with a lot of time on their hands, who love to discover such secrets and publish a way for everyone to get free (and stolen) music.
By placing words like "stolen" or "illegal" in parentheses, he is both inserting and ironizing the discourse of the recording industry.
In my second example, Jobs also implicitly praises the traditional figure of the hacker-as-hero in cyber culture by identifying them as "smart people," while also suggesting that their labor is both needlessly time-intensive and an option only for a particular kind of leisure class in that they have "a lot of time on their hands."
Although this statement has been read as an open critique of the recording industry, I thought the agents of media consolidation got off pretty easy. Jobs' technique seems to be to treat them with quotation marks, using scare quotes to make his sometimes not so subtle point, as he does here:
Since Apple does not own or control any music itself, it must license the rights to distribute music from others, primarily the “big four” music companies: Universal, Sony BMG, Warner and EMI.
He also uses punctuational sarcasm earlier:
To begin, it is useful to remember that all iPods play music that is free of any DRM and encoded in “open” licensable formats such as MP3 and AAC.
In fact, the word "open" is set off as a mediated adjective in Jobs' essay from the very first sentence:
With the stunning global success of Apple’s iPod music player and iTunes online music store, some have called for Apple to “open” the digital rights management (DRM) system
Of course, the whole concept of "openness" and "secrecy" gets an ironic spin in his piece, as another scare quote around the word "hide" demonstrates.
In other words, even if one uses the most sophisticated cryptographic locks to protect the actual music, one must still “hide” the keys which unlock the music on the user’s computer or portable music player.
Jobs' meta-commentary also extends to the position of his competitors, for whom "open" and "closed" have become equally meaningless signifiers.
Perhaps this same conclusion contributed to Microsoft’s recent decision to switch their emphasis from an “open” model of licensing their DRM to others to a “closed” model of offering a proprietary music store, proprietary jukebox software and proprietary players.
For advocates of a digital public sphere, this excessive cuteness about meaning might be counterproductive. Some of us believe that there are real ways that politics, participation, and dialogue can be more open and certain forms of obstruction that are genuinely injurious.
Furthermore, as a writing program administrator, I'm not sure what to make of Jobs' compositional strategy, particularly when sticklers for style in the classroom justifiably try to get their students away from gimmicky punctuation. While Jobs is a culture hero to many undergraduates, I don't want them imitating this prose, particularly when Jobs is indulging in a certain amount of (post)modern European style parenthesizing while also deploying traditional "American" scare tactics with quotation marks.
(Cross) "posted" at Virtualpolitik.
One Size Fits All
There's a nice piece in the Wired Campus of The Chronicle for Higher Education about Wendy Seltzer's experiences with a YouTube takedown notice, which was issued for showing the NFL copyright statement for educational purposes. (Even my beloved Dodgers have a ridiculous copyright claim to all possible fan-related content.) "Fighting YouTube for 'Fair Use'" has a nice tongue-in-cheek opening about how DMCA takedown notices have become included among the "few seminal moments" in an academic career marked by other rituals around publication. Unfortunately, we can't see the original video any more, but we can still enjoy Seltzer's takedown notice.
Michael Moore's Advice For Reducing The Odds Of Being Shot By The Police
Via Blackprof.
Feminized MP3 Headphones
According to Popgadget, they come in six colors. My guess is that men are unlikely to wear them. Why do some women want a "female" version of things, and why are they so often floral and/or pink or purple? Yes, I know the likely response: Don't I have more important things to blog about.
February 17, 2007
Obama Trademarks
The PTO rejected a trademark application for the term "Obama bin Laden" for use on hats, shirts, bumper stickers and pins, ruling that the conflation of the names of a U.S. Senator and the world's leading terrorist was "scandalous" and wrongly suggested a connection between the politician and the accused mass murderer. Story here.
The following phrases have apparently been registered as trademarks: "OBAMA NOT YOUR MAMA FOR PRESIDENT IN 2008" and "OBAMA VS OSAMA IN 2008." A link to the USPTO site featuring these registrations would expire quickly so not offering a supporting link, but you can replicate my searches here.
Axeholes
"Axe Fantasy Mousepad"
From this site, which I don't recommend either. Then there is the "Axe Fantasy" site, which features things like "Seduction Tips" (under the "Hot Stuff" tab) that are so ridiculous it's hard to believe it isn't satire.
Anyone Know If This Was A "Real" Billboard?
"The University of Illinois will retire its 81-year-old American Indian mascot, Chief Illiniwek, following the last men's home basketball game of the season on Wednesday!"
Story here. Learn more about "Indian Mascots" here and here. Are you paying attention, Cleveland? Below is some select cartoon commentary:
Update: I stupidly failed to offer congratulations to Charlene Teters, the women who began protesting against the Chief many years ago, for her children. Her story is described in the excellent New Day Films documentary, In Whose Honor?
February 16, 2007
March of the Librarians
February 15, 2007
Probably Not Real But Still Funny
February 13, 2007
Via Sparkle*Matrix
Via Sparkle*Matrix
I Think He Looks Like A Cartoon Character
But hey, whatever.
Embarassingly Horrible: "The Tax Rap"
In case you were wondering what Vanilla Ice was doing with himself lately.
February 12, 2007
Cripes I Hate Wonderbra
Via Adrants.
Statues From Around The World
Warmest Wishes To My Sister
Who lives in Oswego, NY. She's got plenty of food, lots of snow removing machinery and a generator in case the power goes out, so I feel it's perfectly fine to make fun of her a little!
February 7, 2007
Damsels, Vixens & Buff Guys: Sexism in Video Games
February 5, 2007
Giant Flower-Eating Slug!
Anything About This News Story From USA Today Strike You As Odd?
Teen girl charged with posting nude photos on Internet
PITTSBURGH (AP) — A 15-year-old girl has been arrested for taking nude photographs of herself and posting them on the Internet, police said.
The girl, whose identity was withheld, was accused of sending out photographs of herself in various states of undress and performing a variety of sexual acts. She sent them to people she met in chat rooms on the Internet, police said.
Police seized her computer and found dozens of photographs stored on the hard drive. Authorities did not say how police learned about the girl.
She has been charged with sexual abuse of children, possession of child pornography and dissemination of child pornography.
It's dated 3/29/2004, but I can't find any follow up reports. Given the seriousness of her alleged crimes, do you suppose she was charged as an adult?
February 2, 2007
At Least They'd Get a Bottle of Rum Out of It
Check out the correct answer for number ninety-seven on this 1954 Eighth Grade Civics Test! Wouldn't it be better if we were teaching our kids about this stuff, instead of hectoring them about file-sharing? (By my calculations, I would have gotten what I think is a perfectly respectable B-, but I suspect the law professors on this blog would score higher.)
January 31, 2007
Popular Science in 1933: A One-Man Show with a Magic Hat
January 30, 2007
Greek Students Want The Acropolis Marbles Back
January 26, 2007
Make your own at
Make your own at Signbot
Raising awareness of breast cancer research by putting a violent message on a headless female torso
Photo by techne, from here. Additional impassioned commentary at I Blame The Patriarchy.
January 25, 2007
AE is Correct...
Micro Something, Probably
Blech. Via Feministing.
Del Corazon!
Latino Voices in American Art.
(Above rendering by Ester Hernandez.)
January 23, 2007
Satirical Video About "Sexual Harassment in the Workplace"
Not safe for work! I thought it was funny, but your mileage may vary.
January 22, 2007
African American Visibility In Popular Culture
Over at Blackprof.com, Paul Butler noted:
Three of the top five movies feature predominately African-American casts. Three of the top five songs are by black artists (and the remaining two artists- Fergie and Nelly Furtado - would be nowhere without African-American producers). Barack Obama has the best selling hardcover non-fiction book in the country. Three of the top ten paperback non-fiction best sellers are by blacks (and a fourth- the Freedom Writers Diary - is an anthology that prominently features African-American writers). And two African-American coaches are going to the Big Dance.
January 21, 2007
"The Sound the Stars Make Rushing Through the Sky: The Writings of Jane Johnston Schoolcraft"
From the publisher's website:
Introducing a dramatic new chapter to American Indian literary history, this book brings to the public for the first time the complete writings of the first known American Indian literary writer, Jane Johnston Schoolcraft (her English name) or Bamewawagezhikaquay (her Ojibwe name), Woman of the Sound the Stars Make Rushing Through the Sky (1800-1842). Beginning as early as 1815, Schoolcraft wrote poems and traditional stories while also translating songs and other Ojibwe texts into English. Her stories were published in adapted, unattributed versions by her husband, Henry Rowe Schoolcraft, a founding figure in American anthropology and folklore, and they became a key source for Longfellow's sensationally popular The Song of Hiawatha.
As this remarkably original volume shows, what little has been known about Schoolcraft's writing and life only scratches the surface of her legacy. Most of the works have been edited from manuscripts and appear in print here for the first time. The Sound the Stars Make Rushing Through the Sky presents a collection of all Schoolcraft's known writings along with a cultural and biographical history. Robert Dale Parker's deeply researched account places her writings in relation to American Indian and American literary history and the history of anthropology, offering the story of Schoolcraft, her world, and her fascinating family as reinterpreted through her newly uncovered writing. This book makes available a startling new episode in the history of American culture and literature.
Ewe Want A Singing Sheep Ringtone for Your Phoooooooooone?
Try this one!
January 18, 2007
Which 2006 Fundamentalist Blog Post Is the Most "Fundielicious"?
I'd have to go with September, "Computers Smarter Than Atheists."
(NB: You don't have to register to read the entries, only to vote.)
January 16, 2007
Peter O'Toole Still Has It!
January 15, 2007
Public Domain
Today is an important day to mark the legacy of a great activist for civil rights, human rights, and the peace movement and perhaps the planet's last great political orator as we move into the Internet age. As my colleague Vivian Folkenflik points out, the holiday allows us to create and inhabit our own memorial spaces that honor the spirit of his work.
But, at the risk of committing a sacrilege that may offend some readers, it is also worth commemorating the fact that the work of this great cultural borrower and weaver is not yet part of the public domain where it justifiably belongs. In 1993 the King Estate sued USA Today for reprinting the "I Have a Dream" speech on the thirtieth anniversary of the event, and in 1998 it sued CBS for copyright infringement, even though this speech was delivered in front of 200,000 people and remains a historical high-water mark in our common public memory of social change. You can read how King's image is also licensed for inappropriate commercials in The Washington Post and The New York Times. For more on this story from Virtualpolitik, you can go here, here, and here.
January 14, 2007
Alert The Nobel Prize Committee, Someone Has Invented Video Glasses That Allow Wearers To View Porn In Public
Yahoo "News" coverage here. Note to people who sit next to me on mass transit vehicles: Watch whatever you like, but please keep your hands out of your pants, and far away from me. Thank you.
"Notes On A Scandal"
Heard good things from friends about this movie:
WaPo review here. Haven't seen it and am not an investor, so apologies for the viral-marketing ethos of this post, and I'm sorrier still if you see it and hate it!
Supreme Court Patent Litigation Funnies
January 13, 2007
Ramen Noodle Inventor Dies
From the 1/9/07 NYT:
The news last Friday of the death of the ramen noodle guy surprised those of us who had never suspected that there was such an individual. It was easy to assume that instant noodle soup was a team invention, one of those depersonalized corporate miracles, like the Honda Civic, the Sony Walkman and Hello Kitty, that sprang from that ingenious consumer-product collective known as postwar Japan.
But no. Momofuku Ando, who died in Ikeda, near Osaka, at 96, was looking for cheap, decent food for the working class when he invented ramen noodles all by himself in 1958. His product — fried, dried and sold in little plastic-wrapped bricks or foam cups — turned the company he founded, Nissin Foods, into a global giant. According to the company’s Web site, instant ramen satisfies more than 100 million people a day. Aggregate servings of the company’s signature brand, Cup Noodles, reached 25 billion worldwide in 2006.
More here. And here as well.
January 10, 2007
HUCK FINN at the Metropolitan Playhouse in NYC!
Details here! Written by Sivacracy friend and awesome blogging feminist N.G. McClernan. Part of a Twainathon!
Latte Art
New Ella Fitzgerald Postage Stamp
Story here that starts out with cringe-inducing pun: "The lady is a stamp!"
Parental Warning
Warning: Do not install Vista as your kid's operating system.
Despite what you may have heard this week from places like The New York Times in articles like "For Parents, New Way to Control the Action," it's a truly terrible idea to install software that enforces centralized corporate controls and intentionally disables programs that come from independent software developers. They may say things like "It is not overreaching to say that if you have young children who play computer games or use the Internet you are basically remiss if you do not upgrade to Vista as soon as possible," but listen to the chief technologist of the Electronic Freedom Foundation, Seth Schoen, if you don't believe me and read what he has to say here. Or read from a leading game developer about how Vista hobbles independent game makers who can't afford to buy a rating from the expensive ESRB system. I'm a parent, and I say this new operating system violates almost every one of my 10 Principles for the Digital Family. (This week I'm playing the delightfully mindless GrowCube games with my kids.)
Anyway, just say no on this one.
January 9, 2007
I don't think this haircut will catch on...
But I've been wrong before! From here.
Tony Blair - Should I stay or should I go?
January 6, 2007
Life is a Long Song
Maybe He Needs To Consume More Fiber
Yeah I know, I'm going to Hell for this. Photo via Crummy Church Signs.
Ding, Dong, DOPA is Dead!
Despite passing overwhelmingly in the House, the Deleting Online Predators Act never made it out of the legislative branch to the President's desk. This legislation, which would have barred access to social networking sites in schools and libraries, would have hampered public agencies and nonprofit groups who are reaching out to teens and tweens online and would have had placed economic burdens on the urban poor who use these sites instead of more costly long-distance telephone calls. According to the Learning Now blog on PBS, four of the bill's sponsors lost their re-election bids, and so they lacked the political capital to push it through the Senate before the slate of the year's business was wiped clean, and Democrats who might have second thoughts about the bill took over. Read more objections from Henry Jenkins and Danah Boyd here. Virtualpolitik has talked about DOPA here, here, here, here, and here.
January 4, 2007
Trademark Wars
The participation of fair trade activists in support of government trademark efforts involves some complicated issues for free culture advocates. Check out Oxfam's case for giving Ethiopia an exclusive license for branding Sidamo, Harar and Yirgacheffe coffees.
Here is Starbucks YouTube response.
January 1, 2007
Bobc Has a Blog!
Frequent Sivacracy commenter Bobc has his own blog now: Bobc's Webetorial. Drop by and say hello!
Subverting the Dominant Fortune Cookie Paradigm?
December 31, 2006
Blog People
I've been attending the annual convention of the Modern Language Association, one of the great bastions of academic print culture. Yesterday's MLA session on "Where the Bloggers Are" featured literary academics with some of the more widely read blogs reflecting about the cultural implications of the form for both university environments and the mainstream. It started with Scott Kaufman of Acephalous, which often devotes itself to relatively abstruse literary and philosophical reflections, although the writer did achieved his fifteen minutes of fame for a posting about walking in on two students having sex in his office. Scott is also a blogger from U.C. Irvine, although we had never talked until after the session. As a blogger on the job market, he was particularly concerned with the discouraging news from Ivan Tribble's article in The Chronicle of Higher Education "Bloggers Need Not Apply," and the recent report from the MLA Taskforce on Tenure and Promotion, which indicates that even electronic publication with demonstrable institutional value continues to be undervalued by the academy.
John Holbo of The Valve has posted the draft of his paper, "Form Follows the Function of the Little Magazine," which argues that the real "vanity presses" are academic publications designed only to fill curriculum vitae for tenure and promotion, because they lack broader circulation among the general public. He proposed a different publishing model with Looking for a Fight: Is There a Republican War on Science? as an example, which is published by Parlor Press, which put out the excellent Peers, Pirates, and Persuasion, as Siva has just pointed out. (Holbo also writes for the political blog Crooked Timber.)
Tedra Osell of Bitch Ph.D. compared her own offerings to the blog genre to noncanonical pseudonomynous eighteenth century periodicals like The Female Tatler. It was interesting to hear how her "bitch" persona had a genealogy that went back to being pregnant and her earlier participation in informal Internet advice-sharing culture among moms. I also thought her case that blogs that use pen names and fictionalized personae to develop identity positions that were genuinely reflective of the real writers' marginalized status was provocative, and certainly true in the case of an online personality like Twisty Faster, although it's trickier to make that claim if you are talking about something like Libertarian Girl, which was actually written by a guy. I would have liked to have heard more about her survey in which 95% of female bloggers were conscious of how their writing was gendered, but only 60% of male bloggers were.
Michael Bérubé finished up the session by discussing "blogspats" and how learning the norms of taking sides could be important in academia as well, particularly when some particularly contentious long-running online battles can involve, as he said, "thirty years of feminist theory." Given my interest in how images can be arguments, I thought that there was probably more to be said about the second blogspat he mentioned, "Burqa-gate" on Pandagon. (The first concerned academic power relations and a comment he posted on Scott's blog.) If you look at the debate about the Lieberman blackface image from Firedoglake blogger Jane Hamsher that was posted on the Huffington post, I think that images seem to function as particularly powerful arguments in online communities. (As I've said before, I also think that part of the reason that so much of the user-generated content on the web is composed of parody material may be due to the widely-shared intuition that there is less risk of prosecutable violation of copyright law involved.) I periodically have quibbles with Bérubé's arguments, but I was sorry to hear that he's talking about cutting back on blogging because I count on his sports predictions to amaze my friends and family with my abilities to predict the outcomes of games.
Cross-posted on Virtualpolitik.
December 29, 2006
"Indexed"
Hot Damn!
A friend gave me a bottle of cinnamon schnapps for Christmas. It tastes like liquid Atomic Fireballs.
December 26, 2006
"50 Greatest Cartoons"
Your workplace productivity will surely take a hit if you click here.
The Zaporozhye
The Zaporozhye is a musical condom. Insert bad joke about karaoke or lipsync here. See also.
Charlie Brown Christmas - Performed by the Cast of Scrubs
"With five solid chunks of chocolate, it’s a man sized eat!"
"Yorkies" man sized chunks are for sale in my local World Market.
From Nestle's Yorkie website:
YORKIE - "IT'S NOT FOR GIRLS"
In 2001 the Yorkie "It’s Not for Girls" campaign was launched because, in today’s society, there aren’t many things that a man can look at and say that’s for him.
The 'Not For Girls' campaign theme for Yorkie uses humour, which resonates with today’s British male and simply states that Yorkie is positioning itself as a chocolate bar for men who need a satisfying hunger buster. With five solid chunks of chocolate, it’s a man sized eat!
(Above two photos via Feminist Reprise)
According to Catherine Redfern at the f-word:
The Yorkie ad sparked off tons of publicity as Nestle embarked on a campaign to 'reclaim the sweets' (groan-sorry) for men. The tv ads show women attempting to purchase the chunky chocolate bar - but the only way they can do this is by glueing on fake beards, dressing up as builders with hard hats, and swaggering into corner shops asking (in deep, gruff, fake-male voice) for a "Yorkie please." In one ad, the large, bearded, super-gruff male shopkeeper 'tests' the woman to prove she is a man, by quizzing her on stereotypically male questions, thrusting a fake spider in her face to see if she screams, and so on. He finally hands the bar over, but when he tells her the it really highlights the blue in her eyes, she gasps "really?" and he snatches the Yorkie out of her hands and bites off a huge, masculine chunk in one go.
Women and men even eat chocolate differently in the world of advertising - men snap off chunks on the side of their mouth and chew and swallow purposefully, and of course, they scowl as they're doing it. Women suck and nibble slowly, eyes closed, perhaps raising a well-manicured fingertip to the corner of their mouth to daintily catch a few stray crumbles - think Cadbury's Flake for the classic freudian way to eat chocolate. (The only exception that I can think of to this is Dawn French stuffing wedges of Terry's Chocolate Orange into her mouth in a most unladylike fashion.)
However, chocolate isn't a pseudo-orgasmic experience for the men who eat Yorkie, of course. It's a re-affirmation of their manhood. The Yorkie ads, on tv and posters, used the slogans "It's not for girls", "don't feed the birds", "not available in pink" and "King size, not Queen size." Interestingly, the campaign even affected the design of the bar itself, seemingly intended to literally stop women buying the bar in the real world. The "O" in Yorkie has been altered into a "no go" road sign, with a line cutting through a woman symbol. The bar also has the phrase "not for girls" on it.
Nestle claims to be taking a stand for the "British bloke" and says that by making a chocolate "just for men", they are offering men something just for them in a changing, confusing world. They have actually used the word "reclaiming", as if women have "taken" chocolate away from men - despite the obvious fact that chocolate is mainly marketed to women by the people who create it. But from the ads, they seem to be targeting not "British men" but British, large, bearded, macho, builders. That's gotta be a limited market, guys. Using the most hackneyed stereotypes, the Yorkie ads seem to be trying to say that eating chocolate is an okay thing for a man to be seen to be doing; it isn't a cissy thing to do, it's not emasculating. But they are also saying that men can only feel happy eating chocolate if it is associated with everything very, very MACHO. Men can enjoy things associated with women - as long as they are constantly demonstrating in the most tired cliches that they are still REAL MEN. They can only eat chocolate if the chocolate in question is branded as NOT-FEMALE. Really, they do protest too much, don't you think?
“Dark Tink" is “the bad girl side of Miss Bell that Walt never saw.”
At least according to this NYT article, in which Peggy Orenstein expresses confusion and concern about the popularity of Disney princess merchandise and the princess meme generally that is apparently wildly popular with girls in this country. Here are a couple of short exerpts that were especially sad:
"...Mulan and Pocahontas, arguably the most resourceful of the bunch, are rarely depicted on Princess merchandise, t.hough for a different reason. Their rustic garb has less bling potential than that of old-school heroines like Sleeping Beauty. (When Mulan does appear, she is typically in the kimonolike hanfu, which makes her miserable in the movie, rather than her liberated warrior’s gear.)"...
"...The infatuation with the girlie girl certainly could, at least in part, be a reaction against the so-called second wave of the women’s movement of the 1960s and ’70s (the first wave was the fight for suffrage), which fought for reproductive rights and economic, social and legal equality. If nothing else, pink and Princess have resuscitated the fantasy of romance that that era of feminism threatened, the privileges that traditional femininity conferred on women despite its costs — doors magically opened, dinner checks picked up, Manolo Blahniks. Frippery. Fun. Why should we give up the perks of our sex until we’re sure of what we’ll get in exchange? Why should we give them up at all? Or maybe it’s deeper than that: the freedoms feminism bestowed came with an undercurrent of fear among women themselves — flowing through “Ally McBeal,” “Bridget Jones’s Diary,” “Sex and the City” — of losing male love, of never marrying, of not having children, of being deprived of something that felt essentially and exclusively female. ..."
As I read the piece, Orenstein is describing, in rather convoluted fashion, the classic double bind for feminists: Women who embrace “princessism” are vapid and materialistic and rejecting feminsm while embracing their shallow, fragile feminine femaleness. However, women who reject “princessism” are actually rejecting women-identified things and are therefore being sexist themselves, which is hypocritical and self-hating, and also drives women away from feminism. She comes closest to acknowledging and explaining this herself when she writes:
At the grocery store one day, my daughter noticed a little girl sporting a Cinderella backpack. “There’s that princess you don’t like, Mama!” she shouted.
“Um, yeah,” I said, trying not to meet the other mother’s hostile gaze.
“Don’t you like her blue dress, Mama?”
I had to admit, I did.
She thought about this. “Then don’t you like her face?”
“Her face is all right,” I said, noncommittally, though I’m not thrilled to have my Japanese-Jewish child in thrall to those Aryan features. (And what the heck are those blue things covering her ears?) “It’s just, honey, Cinderella doesn’t really do anything.”
Over the next 45 minutes, we ran through that conversation, verbatim, approximately 37 million times, as my daughter pointed out Disney Princess Band-Aids, Disney Princess paper cups, Disney Princess lip balm, Disney Princess pens, Disney Princess crayons and Disney Princess notebooks — all cleverly displayed at the eye level of a 3-year-old trapped in a shopping cart — as well as a bouquet of Disney Princess balloons bobbing over the checkout line. The repetition was excessive, even for a preschooler. What was it about my answers that confounded her? What if, instead of realizing: Aha! Cinderella is a symbol of the patriarchal oppression of all women, another example of corporate mind control and power-to-the-people! my 3-year-old was thinking, Mommy doesn’t want me to be a girl?
According to theories of gender constancy, until they’re about 6 or 7, children don’t realize that the sex they were born with is immutable. They believe that they have a choice: they can grow up to be either a mommy or a daddy. Some psychologists say that until permanency sets in kids embrace whatever stereotypes our culture presents, whether it’s piling on the most spangles or attacking one another with light sabers. What better way to assure that they’ll always remain themselves? ... By not buying the Princess Pull-Ups, I may be inadvertently communicating that being female (to the extent that my daughter is able to understand it) is a bad thing.
The essay has a rather trite happy ending, in which Orenstein notes that her daughter still wants to be a "fireman" when she grows up, but it raises some issues that are worth contemplating, though in ways that felt a bit like fingernails on a chalkboard at times. And what to make of "Dark Tink?" Here is some sample Dark Tink merchandise:
Is she supposed to offer a “slutty” princess alternative? Is offering that option in addition to virginal tulle and satin an improvement?
December 24, 2006
Let There Be Peace
Let it begin with me. Warmest holiday wishes to all.
December 23, 2006
Not A Very Nice Tee Shirt
Manufactured by the Route 66 clothing company and for sale at KMart.
Whoa, stunning remix by Chris Clarke here.
December 22, 2006
My Most Unintentionally Funny E-mail of 2006
I know that the month isn't out yet, but how much better than this can my inbox get?
We'll All Feel Gay When Johnny Comes Marching Home.
Watch this toy commercial from the 196os all the way through and see if it makes you want to bonk your head on your computer monitor. Don't miss the final chilling sentence. Via Sparkle*Matrix:
December 21, 2006
UPS Working To Minimize Left Turns
Sounds like some sort of creepy conservative political initiative, doesn't it? But actually, it's an effort to speed up delivery time, according to this article (via NTodd) which touts software that reportedly makes UPS drivers more productive. Here's an excerpt:
Collectively, the hundreds of UPS trucks driven in Minnesota have cut an estimated 353,755 miles over the past two years.
The software also allows better route planning. That already is something of a science at UPS, which has sought to minimize the number of left turns a driver must make, wasting time waiting for oncoming traffic before turning.
The software sounds terrific from a technology standpoint, but I suspect the drivers have to work harder than ever if they are now making more deliveries per day.
December 20, 2006
Send in the Clowns
Recently The Los Angeles Times covered the intellectual property infringement lawsuit against celebrity gossip blogger Perez Hilton filed by the paparazzi photo agency X17 in "Perez Hilton Takes Their Best Shots." Apparently X17 is complaining that Hilton wasn't properly accrediting their snaps, and they are now publishing their own rival gossip blog X17online, which is full of dreary shots of celebrities Christmas shopping. The lawsuit alleges that the dollar value of some of their most scandalous pics of star misbehavior, which were slated to be sold to print tabloids, actually dropped as a direct result of Perez's scoops that previewed the material. Access to the X17 site involves elaborate approval procedures, which yours truly was not able to charm on scholarly research grounds. The agency is also loudly declaring their use of a new interface that prevents easy right-click acquisition of digital files, as if we all don't know what that "print screen" button is for on the keyboard.
Hilton often Photoshops the images that he gets illicitly from the photo agencies and then adds rude comments or obscene graffiti (along with his own proprietary URL) . He also periodically looks at intersections between real and virtual worlds as he did in a piece on how fans created sims of their favorite celebrity Paris Hilton for online role playing games. I don't like the catty misogyny of his gossip coverage, even if I might appreciate the way he thumbs his nose at this kind of IP litigation, as even his choice of sound-alike name indicates. The curious can see this recent Saturday Night Live monologue to get a sense of the main kind of story Perez Hilton runs.
Of course, even though I'm an IP activist, my general feeling is: a pox on both your houses. Digital culture is about being a media star yourself and making your own brand; it's not about marketing the pre-fabricated corporatized images of others. Even if you do it in an out-of-the-closet "queen of all media" allegedly subversive way, I don't dig the patriarchal voyeurism that this kind of "journalism" supports.
When it comes to entertainment based on copying, I say send in the real clowns. Last night I went to see Slava's Snowshow, which was gloriously full of imitation of the work of others: music, gags, costumes, and all. In our trademark-happy era, Slava is lucky not to be facing lawsuit claims about his nose or bald head or about the way he delivered the conventional clown-full-of-arrows schtick with an unauthorized pathos. And those who want to extend the rights of content producers beyond first sale might say: that umbrella has been modified to spray water on people rather than protect them from the elements. According to the blog about unintentional legal humor perpetuated by lawyers, Lowering the Bar, there certainly have been clown-related IP lawsuits in the past.
Cross-posted on Virtualpolitik.
December 19, 2006
Innovation v. Corporate Culture
December 18, 2006
Make Your Own Flying Spaghetti Monster Holiday Lights!
Instructions and more photos here.
December 14, 2006
The Enemy of My Enemy Redux
Yesterday I interviewed Michael Zyda, one of the fathers of the military recruitment videogame America's Army, who currently directs the Gamepipe Lab at USC.
America's Army has been called a "propaganda game" by Gonzalo Frasca, creator of the pacifist non-shooter game September 12. In the name of free speech, Zyda himself, who has left the America's Army project, says that he has no problem with in-game protestors, like the activist who messaged the names of soldiers killed in the current conflict under the nom-de-guerre "Dead-in-Iraq."
In addition to its over-the-top patriotic kitsch, America's Army serves up a mix of deliberative encounters with an encyclopedic variety of lovingly rendered military weaponry and a testosterone-oriented environment of male-only avatars duking it out in a kilometer by kilometer field of battle.
America's Army is certainly a strangely psychotic game, given that you can play collaboratively as either attackers or defenders in the same game space, but you can only see yourself as a uniformed U.S. soldier holding a weapon produced in the Good Old U.S. of A. In other words, if you drop your M-16 and the enemy picks it up, it magically turns into an AK-47. If you seize his Soviet-era assault rifle in some nifty hand-to-hand action, it turns into a standard issue American weapon right before your eyes. I guess the only advantage would be that it would prevent Battlefield2 type misunderstandings when fan films are posted on the Internet.
Another weird switcheroo in AA, apparently security flaws allow online Gold Farmers to move into the game who can earn points for military training, service, and promotion for others in exchange for eBay dollars . It's sort of like the 19th century practice of paying a substitute to stand in for you during the Civil War, but apparently its used just to bypass the boring parts of basic training.
Of course, being an electronic communication geek, I liked learning about some of the meta-rhetoric embedded in the game. For digital rhetoric fans, you can actually watch a PowerPoint lecture to further your training as a medic and then take a version of the real certification test. If you look closely at the game environment, you can also spot a framed copy of the letter to the game designers authorizing the game's development.
Yes, but what does all of this have to do with intellectual property and the duplication of digital media?
A lot, actually. Like some other military videogames, America's Army is based on the proprietary and prohibitively expensive Unreal game engine. As advocates for game-based learning, like James Paul Gee and Henry Jenkins, get heard by more policy makers, this stranglehold on the market by a few companies also makes public game development work for education and training more costly and inconvenient, because the entire enterprise is wrapped up in corporate red tape and secrecy. Now Zyda is working with the open source game engine Ogre and has plans to share his lab's customizing of the program at Gamepipe with others who are similarly pursuing peaceful and constructive ends. You can read more about it in Zyda's "From Visual Simulation to Virtual Reality to Games."
P.S. In case anyone wondered, I was in Australia for the CGIE conference.
December 10, 2006
Odd Watches
A whole website about them here.
December 9, 2006
Funky Chicken Santa
One of my favorite holiday decorations, by local artist Ernest Lee.
Keener Than A Junkyard Frog
December 7, 2006
A Libation For My Students Who Cannot Follow Exam Instructions
More information brewing here. NB: At Concurring Opinions, Heidi Kitrosser notes a fermenting dispute over the proprietry of "Santa's Butt Winter Porter."
To which I say:
Then of course there is the feminist holiday alcoholic beverage of choice:
The Genders of Milk and Glue
Did you know that Elsie the Borden trademark, and Elmer of Elmer's Glue, were married? From Elmer's.com one learns:
"Elsie the Cow became Borden's very popular "Spokescow" in the late 1930's. She was a big hit at the 1939 New York World's Fair, and soon afterwards the character of Elmer the Bull was created as Elsie's husband. In the late 1940's, Borden's new Chemical Division asked to use Elsie for its new white glue product. The thought of Elsie representing a non-food product didn't seem appropriate, so as a compromise, Elmer was loaned to Chemical as their very own "spokesbull". To this day, Elmer the Bull still represents the most recognized adhesive company."
Elmer appears on tee shirts and a whole range of adhesive products:
Elsie was onced played by a real cow named "You'll Do Lobelia." I can see why You'll Do Lobelia preferred "Elsie" as a stage name. Elsie is drawn with lots of feminine gender signifiers, but her udder is never in evidence:
In this trademark rendering, Elsie periodically winks seductively at consumers:
Here is a vintage postcard depicting Elsie and Elmer's trademark abode, with a caption that reminds the consumer that Elsie pays careful attention to her grooming:
"Elsie's dressing table, made of barrels, has milk bottle lamps and their toiletries include Tail Wave Set, Henna Fur Glaze and Meadow Mud Pack. Elmer's chair is made of actual wheels with barrel staves for rockers. The candle sticks are half ears of corn and the bed ladders have scythe-handles for supports. Books in the breakfront include 'The Farmer With Cold Hands', and 'Animal Husbandry and Wifery'."
Below is a cheerful trademarked holiday scene. Elsie wears both an apron and part of a house in front of her teats, while Elmer artfully obscures his gonads by standing behind a snowcow. Daughter Beulah appears to sit with her hooves modestly crossed, but what in the world is she photographing?
If Beulah had a trademarked brother, would his name be "Veal"?
December 4, 2006
Legalese In The Age of IM
Noting the strict word and page length limits judges impose on briefs and oral arguments, Roger Wade Hughes has proposed that appellate lawyers adopt a system of communicating via IM type acronyms, such as:
- ASSA = assuming arguendo
- WADR = with all due respect
- 2SL = slippery slope
- WSA = well settled authority
XF? Via Law.com.
December 3, 2006
Two Versions of the My Little Pony Glue Factory
It must be a very popular toy this season?
December 2, 2006
The Bacon of the Month Club
Not a great holiday gift for a vegetarian like me, so please don't think I'm dropping hints. Funny post about it here. Via Discourse.net.
December 1, 2006
Google Earth, the Analog Version
More photos, and some probably descriptive words that I think might be in German, here.
When Vomiting Passengers Work In Your Favor
That's a fairly disgusting post title, isn't it? I've had a lot of airline misadventures recently, but today the day was truly saved by vomiting passengers. I had a two part flight, and takeoff for the first leg was delayed by almost an hour, because the pilot was busy reattaching the plane engines with duct tape (or something). At least I wasn't going to or through Chicago, since all flights there were cancelled due to a storm. After it finally took off the first flight was really, really bumpy and neither beverage service nor beverage recycling (a.k.a. using the restroom) was permitted.
I got to the intermediate airport only a few minutes before my flight back to Columbia was scheduled to take off, so I ran though the airport to try to get to my gate before the plane left without me. Back in the olden days I used to call this "doing an O.J. Simpson" in reference to those racing and suitcase leaping television commercials he once made for Hertz. Now of course "doing an O.J. Simpson" has a very different and far more sinister cultural meaning. In any event, I got to my "flights to petit-sized cites" gate, and four small planes were all being boarded at once. I asked the ticket agent if the plane for Columbia had left, and he asked me my name, took my ticket, and waved me through. I asked two additional airport employees which plane was going to Columbia, and showed both of them my ticket stub. The first just sort of pointed vaguely, and the second took my misnomered "carry on" suitcase, which I had to do a "curbside check" with, and put it onto a rolling cart. I boarded the associated plane only to find someone already buckled into my seat. I asked her if she was going to Columbia too, and she said, "No, this is the plane for Columbus, Ohio." The bemused flight attendant verified this midwestern aeronautical destination, so I got back off the plane and tried to liberate my suitcase from the "curbside check" cart, which apparently triggered some sort of terrorism profiling, which required me to have a lengthy and fairly animated conversation with a TSA official.
Finally I got back into the terminal and a new ticket was issued so I could get on the Columbia bound plane, which, it turned out, hadn't even begun boarding due to the fact that about half the passengers on the previous flight had barfed all over the cabin, and it was being cleaned. This flight attendant turned the air conditioning way up, distributed duplicate air sickness bags, and refused to give any of us drinks or snacks (and who could blame her?). Thanks to the airsickness of strangers, I made it home to Columbia only an hour late.
November 30, 2006
A Thousand Flowers
Before the month is out, I want to take a moment to acknowledge the visit of my colleague Mike Palmquist of Colorado State to the U.C. Irvine campus to argue for a smart software alternative to proprietary course management tools like Blackboard. Mike claims that traditional course management tools only reinforce the hierarchical pedagogy of the conventional lecture hall -- combined with mindless skill and drill online testing -- and do not take adequate advantage of the learner-oriented possibilities of digital communication. Mike is one of the creators of The Writing Studio, which allows teachers to direct college students to create better writing portfolios, blogs, scholarly annotations, and group projects. With their decentralized model, apparently you can start your own "co-op" at your own institution of higher learning without paying onerous fees to a publishing giant. Of course, I was a bit taken aback by the copyright disclaimer of the Studio, but I can be more choosy than most since I'm fortunate enough to teach at a Blackboard-free campus that in 1999 hosted an idealistic international conference about building university electronic educational environments on the not-for-profit model.
November 27, 2006
Ouch.
Photo available for purchase here. Caption from site is as follows:
"Coloured X-ray of a woman's foot in a high-heel shoe. The construction of the shoe is clearly seen; so is the way that the foot is forced to rest mainly on its toes. Bones and soft tissues of the lower leg and foot are visible. The lower leg bones are the tibia and fibula. The foot comprises many bones, including the calcaneus (heel bone), several tarsal bones, five metatarsals, culminating in the phalanges bones of the toes."
Via this comment at I Blame the Patriarchy where Twisty Faster has written a sermon about high heels that, if you enjoy wearing heels, will probably not be much to your liking.
November 26, 2006
Extreme Blending
From Will It Blend? Here's one with a (late) holiday theme.
November 22, 2006
Rabbit Hole
Last night I went to see Andrew "Bunnie" Huang at USC, where he gave a talk about reverse engineering and the use of open source software in proprietary products, as part of Cory Doctorow's series of Fullbright Chair talks. Although hackers are often associated with software programming, Huang is also interested in hardware and tinkering literally at the nuts-and-bolts level. He defends the right of the consumer to take things they've bought apart, and this ethos also informs his choice of projects. For example, you can see the guts of a Microsoft Zune MP3 player on his blog this week. Perhaps Huang's most famous exploit is hacking the Xbox, which he describes in a tell-all book that includes a primer on hardware modding and a diatribe against the DMCA. Huang also gave a pretty standard pitch talk on the Chumby, a beanbag device for portable computing designed to appeal to the DIY crowd.
November 21, 2006
Never Seen This Happen At An Academic Conference...
Thank goodness. And, see also, or check out the techno remix.
Involuntary Art Acquisitions
November 19, 2006
Strap This On A Student's Hand...
November 18, 2006
Gated Communities
As though it weren't enough for the Internet to be the primary vehicle of child molesters and terrorists, apparently it is also the superhighway of evil drug traffickers, who are after our kids as well. Or so I learn from the new tutorials on "E-monitoring" from Parents. The Anti-Drug. The fact that parents are being encouraged to buy proprietary software programs and pursue parenting strategies analogous to the surveillance culture of authoritarian regimes, such as China and Iran, should be concerning to those who want their children to grow up to be citizens who make the right choices freely. (You can see the research coming out of the OpenNet Initiative for more on why Internet censorship is both self-defeating and a sign of the total failure of a system of governance.)
My vote for the scariest sentence in this anti-technology hysteria website was this one: "While technology offers many positive things, like connectedness and information, those same attributes, if misused, can also be quite harmful." What about those of us who don't accept the idea that informing the young is harmful? Apparently, we are sadly deluded about how "hooked" our kids are on these new technologies. Most bizarre, perhaps, on the E-monitoring site was the link to current "street lingo" from the White House Office of National Drug Policy.
Then again, perhaps communication technology needs to be demonized now that public service announcements like "Pete's Couch" have abandoned scare tactics with regard to actual recreational drug use. Of course, there are already several video send-ups of the "Pete's Couch" spot on YouTube.
When it comes to technology tutorials for parents like this one, it is worth keeping in mind that research by danah boyd on teen computing seems to suggest that something more is at work in the use of instant messaging, mobile communications, and social networking sites by the young than the fastest way to the creepy dealer down the street. She suggests that this behavior is also a logical reaction to parental authority from over-scheduled kids whose sociality has been radically constrained by a society based fundamentally on stranger danger. With playdates and even home schooling, young people searching for social contact that isn't an extension of family relationships go to the Internet to seek out less homogeneous and more diverse forms of community.
One of the statistics that is supposed to be most alarming to parents is this one: 14% of teens have a live face-t0-face meeting with someone they've met online. "Gulp. Scary," we are supposed to say. But I have a teen. He's used the global reach of the Internet to learn about interests that might otherwise be too esoteric for kids in his immediate social circle. For example, he found a teen rugby club with an international group of adults -- including some articulate feminists -- promoting participation in the sport. He also located a DJ academy where he could learn about scratch and mix techniques in a multicultural and multigenerational environment of collaboration around the craft. So -- yes -- he's even met adults through the Internet . . . people otherwise known as coaches and teachers. You can see some of the suspect characters my kid has met in the photo above, where he's spinning vinyl for winning one of the three top mix prizes at his class's graduation. (He's the kid with the blond mop top in the middle of Mr. Choc and DJ Hapa.)
Update on UCLA Library Taser Incident Captured on Cell Phone Camera and Posted to YouTube
Since footage of a UCLA student without ID being tasered by police in Powell library first appeared on YouTube, there have already been a number of remixes and classic YouTube first-person webcam commentary pieces (like this, this, and this).
UCLA's Iranian Student Group and the Muslim Students Association have been organizing large campus and street protests, but these organizations have not yet updated their websites with information or commentary about the incident. The best coverage is probably at The Daily Bruin.
This is a library I know well. I studied there often when I was a graduate student, even when it moved into a temporary structure next door during the building's long process of renovation. What impresses me about the video is how other students weren't afraid to become involved in the plight of a relative stranger: they immediately requested badge numbers and protested the excessive use of force.
November 17, 2006
Whut Kinda Accent Y'all Got?
Figure it out here.
The Anarchist in the Library
Here in Los Angeles, cameras in mobile phones combined with the video sharing capacities of YouTube have publicized a number of high profile cases of police brutality. (A search on YouTube with the keywords "police brutality" brings up hundreds of videos from all around the world.)
This latest case was actually posted on the blog for the Chronicle of Higher Education. It's hard to watch as twenty-three-year-old Mostafa Tabatabainejad is repeatedly tasered for being in the UCLA library without an ID after 11PM.
Details are here from the LA Times.
November 16, 2006
Tab Stinks, Don't Drink this Crap, Part 2
Part 1 is here.
Now this:
Full advertisement visible here. Blech! This demonstrates worst taste than the actual beverage, which is basically "pink carbonated essence of bathroom cleanser." Via Counterfeit Chic.
There is Some Odd Stuff on the Internets..
In case you hadn't noticed. How does the model manage to keep the same facial expression, regardless of which "gem sweater" she is wearing? I'm kind of coveting the "Devil's Blood" (page 7) myself, how about you?
Airbag Folding
Click here to learn the relationship between airbags and origami. If you're a geek, that is. Via Yet Another Sheep.
November 15, 2006
Weird Al La Driew
"Bob" and other palindromes, via GreeneSpace, where Sally Greene says: "Don't Nod."
In Case You Needed Another Reason To Dread The Coming Holiday Season
It's "Pull My Finger Santa" and he can probably be hacked to say "Merry Christmas," which is sure to please the uptight "Happy Holidays" adverse Christians on your gift list.
This is another classy way to celebrate the birth of Jeebus. And how about some Yule Doo for the tree?
"The only ornament of it's kind! A glittering doo hung from a satin ribbon. It looks like a piece of dog doo complete with frosted snow! It makes a great gift for your dog loving friends!"
November 14, 2006
Ich bin kein Berliner: She is Not a Jelly Doughnut
For post title context, watch this. She has done a remarkable series of videos about mental health issues. Via The Trouble With Spikol, where Liz Spikol writes: "I admire this woman for trying to talk about her experience, and for saying what I should say more often: You're not alone."
November 12, 2006
BruteTube
Of course, the big news here in LA is the videotaped beating of twenty-four-year-old William Cardenas, which was posted on the video sharing site YouTube. Viewers can watch here and see Cardenas struggling as he is restrained by officers; he says "I can't breathe" four times. As The Los Angeles Times reports in "Video, arrest report at odds," officers only report punching Cardenas twice despite digital evidence to the contrary.
Los Angeles has a bad history when it comes to police brutality and subsequent LAPD attempts at spin control. Some worry that YouTube's ability to disseminate images of police brutality rapidly will stimulate more Rodney King-style urban unrest. I tend to think that the Internet's ability to publicize messages that authorities may otherwise ignore will actually offer an outlet and opportunity for redress that could forestall frustrated expressions of retaliatory violence in the form of rioting and looting. I say that as someone who has had rocks thrown at my car, guns pointed at me by national guardsmen at my grocery store, and marching feet down my street at night during the Los Angeles riots. Certainly the pre-Internet era didn't handle these cases any better.
In connection with this story, it's also worth noting that the LAPD has a very snazzy website with video messages from Chief Bratton and a new LAPD blog.
Ironically, the existence of YouTube has sometimes encouraged the enforcement of intellectual property rules that contain and control the dissemination of such visual messages. For example, in the case of another well-publicized beating, that of truck driver Reginald Denny, copyright holders asserted their rights to take critical footage from the history of Los Angeles out of the public domain.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
November 10, 2006
Falling for Tetris
The BBC documentary "Tetris -- From Russia With Love," now available on Google video, is well worth its hour running time, especially for anyone who has ever let phones ring or dinners burn while playing the seemingly simple game of stacking up the falling geometric shapes. This tale of Tetris also is a story about intellectual property and digital culture that involves several countries and corporate players that took place on the geopolitical stage of the end of the Cold War. In other words, who owns the product of the work of programmers at the state-run Soviet-era Moscow computer center, which was subsequently installed on computers throughout the Eastern Bloc? Atari, Nintendo, and Great Britain's Mirrorsoft all fought for the rights. Nick Montfort of Grand Text Auto also praises the film on this link.
November 6, 2006
"Let's Paint, Exercise, & Blend Drinks TV!"
November 5, 2006
Checking back in...
With PostSecret:
and with academicsecret:
The power to walk away: I almost got sucked into a really unnecessary online discussion about some topic that's close to my heart. Does everyone here know what trolls are? Trolls are people who seem to be engaged with you in a discussion seriously, but in reality are just trying to derail the conversation. They are to be avoided. The only outcome of engaging in a discussion with a troll is rising blood pressure and major frustration. Oh, plus lots of time lost. So stay away from them. ...
The Weepy Little Professor: This semester, I noticed a group of students who basically sit in the back and laugh the whole time. Turns out (perhaps sadly), this is nothing new. But for some reason, it's bothering me a lot. It feels like they're lauging at me.
As a result, I'm finding myself growing more and more self conscious, and I'm losing my lecturing mojo. I'm constantly checking my fly, touching my nose, the whole nine. It's stupid, but it's bothering me.
The thing that's so weird about it is the way they laugh. They look at me, but turn their heads, and put their hand up in front of their faces to whisper something to the others. Then they all giggle. While staring at me. With their hands over their mouths. Imagine a 7th grade lunchroom, and you've got the idea.
The thing is, they're not really disrupting the class, just themselves and me. I once made a joke directed toward the entire class to the effect that the lecturing stage was not, in fact, a television, and that I could actually see them chatting. The class laughed. For once, the little group did not.
But they also didn't stop. ...
November 3, 2006
Don't Stop Believing! Rock On!
Last night I attended a rock concert here in Columbia SC at the Colonial Center, a double feature of Journey (without Steve Perry) and Def Leppard. This is not an event I would have driven very far for, but since it occurred in a venue less than two blocks from the law school, and I actually was able to park in the law school parking lot (which with only seven years seniority I am far too junior to do during the work day) I figured what the heck. It was just as hammy and glammy as you might expect, with an abundance of arena band accoutrements (strobe lights, leather pants, guitars bearing the British flag, pyrotechnically contained fire blasts at regular increments), and many stereotypical Rock Star Moves by the performers, such as pointing at the audience, clapping hands over head, pop and lock dance maneuvers, leaping onto the drummer and keyboarder platforms, pumped fists, and flailing the microphone stand around with vigor.
A singer named Stoll Vaughn was the opening act. He sounded a lot like Bob Dylan, and seems to be actively cultivating a Dylanesque persona. Nothing wrong with that, though it did strike me as a tiny bit heavy handed to title one of his songs "Working Class Man," which referenced denim, I kid you not, and was clearly pitched at winning over what may or may not have been a substantially blue collar audience.
Journey opened with a guitar version of the Star Spangled Banner, which got the crowd on its feet, and led some people in the audience to unfurl and gesticulate wildly with the American flags they had presciently brought along for the occasion. Journey was very loud, and a couple of their songs were completely unrecognizable to me. I couldn't comprehend the lyrics very well, but still managed to sing along to some of the classics that were somehow implanted in my brain. I particularly enjoyed "Wheel in the Sky" and "Lights" and of course "Don't Stop Believing." "Faithfully" and "Open Arms" brought back memories of my Senior Prom, which was sort of a mixed blessing, shall we say.
Def Leppard was somehow even louder than Journey, and a little more anthropologically interesting since most of the original members are still part of the band. I was able to understand the singers' words a little more cogently thanks largely to the fact that two women in front of me sang along with every single song, from beginning to end. Luckily they had pretty nice voices. The band's performance of "Rock On" was great, and so was "Let's Get Rocked" and "Photograph." Their legendary one armed drummer (prepare for obvious cliche) didn't miss a beat.
Mock me if you must, I'd do the same in your shoes, but dood, it was a pretty fun evening. Unfortunately I was spotted by some law students also in attendance, so now all I have to do is come up with a good copyright or trademark law related explanation for my presence at the concert. Suggestions in the comments are very welcome!
November 1, 2006
Substance in Red Wine Extends Life of Mice
Drink The Kool Aid
October 31, 2006
Free Hugs
Happy Halloween!
From here.
October 30, 2006
Anti-War Posters You Are Unlikely To See Displayed in South Carolina
Here. Sort of safe for work, sort of not, depending on whether your boss has a sense of humor.
Weird Campaign Advertisement
October 29, 2006
Spam O'Lantern
Yeah, it kind of makes me queasy too. From here.
Free Culture Badge
Of course, it's not the first time that I've been troubled by the decisions of scouting policy makers. Certainly, I was hacked off by the fact that the leadership has stripped even the littlest scouts of their religion insignia if it was earned from activities involving my centuries old religion that included many of the founding fathers, just because my faith shows more respect for the individual lifestyle choices and committed unions of gays and lesbians than the BSA does. (The major religion in question even developed a separate scouting curriculum to try to solve the conflict.)
After reading a story about a somewhat similar scout-sponsored piracy prevention program in Hong Kong, readers may remember that Mel Horan and I jokingly crafted some nifty mock-ups of possible patches to be used, should the program come here to the States. This was a gag, however. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that it would actually happen. How could such a one-sided, moralistic, anti-consumer marketing effort be foisted on a bunch of earnest and community-minded kids?
So now we've made up a new patch, for a much more challenging "Free Culture" badge, to be earned by intrepid, hard working, patriotic scouts. Here are some of the requirements:
- Appear at the door of a major studio, dressed in your full scout uniform, and try to talk them into allowing educational use of historical films commonly shown in public schools (Amistad, Schindler's List, etc.)
- Raise money with a bakesale to go across the country to CMG Worldwide in Indianapolis or Intellectual Properties Management (IPM) in Atlanta to convince these organizations to free images associated with Rosa Parks or Martin Luther King and release them into the public domain for use in school projects, such as web pages
- Paint a colorful mural on a graffiti covered wall across the street from the headquarters of the RIAA with the 9 Reasons Digital Media Products Are a Bad Deal for Consumers.
- Using your knot-disentangling skills, visit a hospital or nursing home and help the aged with their DRM-hobbled digital products
- Go to an orphanage, battered children's home, or juvenile detention facility and show kids how to use Creative Commons resources
- Put in 100 hours of community service at your local library and see the toll that new legislation against patron privacy and public connectivity takes on your local civil servants. Then imagine what it will be like if they have to deal with RIAA and MPAA lawsuits for circulating audio and video content.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
October 28, 2006
Must Read
Anybody who is either a parent or educator should read the new White Paper from the MacArthur Foundation, "Confronting the Challenges of Participatory Culture: Media Education for the 21st Century," which was written by Henry Jenkins and a team of concerned educators.
According to a 2005 study conducted by the Pew Internet and American Life project (Lenhardt & Madden, 2005),more than one-half of all American teens—and 57 percent of teens who use the Internet—could be considered media creators. For the purpose of the study, a media creator is someone who created a blog or webpage, posted original artwork, photography, stories or videos online or remixed online content into their own new creations.Most have done two or more of these activities.One-third of teens share what they create online with others, 22 percent have their own websites, 19 percent blog, and 19 percent remix online content.
Contrary to popular stereotypes, these activities are not restricted to white suburban males. In fact, urban youth (40 percent) are somewhat more likely than their suburban (28 percent) or rural (38 percent) counterparts to be media creators. Girls aged 15-17 (27 percent) are more likely than boys their age (17 percent) to be involved with blogging or other social activities online.The Pew researchers found no significant differences in participation by race-ethnicity.
If anything, the Pew study undercounts the number of American young people who are embracing the new participatory culture.The Pew study did not consider newer forms of expression, such as podcasting, game modding or machinima. Nor did it count other forms of creative expression and appropriation, such as music sampling in the hip hop community. These forms are highly technological but use other tools and tap other networks for their production and distribution.The study does not include even more widespread practices, such as computer or video gaming, that can require an extensive focus on constructing and performing as fictional personas.Our focus here is not on individual accomplishment but rather the emergence of a cultural context that supports widespread participation in the production and distribution of media.
The document also presents a great advocacy argument for targeting resources toward those dependent on public networks and against moronic anti-connectivity legislation like the Deleting Online Predators Act.
If you want to learn more, the Center has a lot of terrific educator-oriented material about Building the Field of Digital Media and Learning, and I have some how-to tips for parents at "10 Principles for the Digital Family."
October 24, 2006
Halloween Costumes For Girls
Of course no one has to buy them if they don't want to, and the option of making a Halloween costume is always available, but for parents or kids who do want to purchase commercially manufactured costumes, the ones produced explicitly for girls are very feminine and overtly sexual. Here are a few offerings from "Party America":
And as if the costumes aren't sexualized enough, consider the amount of make-up worn by the children modeling them, and the incredibly adult and provocative poses they are striking. Socialization for "Slut-o-ween" begins at a very young age.
October 22, 2006
Mixed Emotions About These Tees...
Available here. I know they are just supposed to be funny, but there is something weird about the messages too. Somehow they possibly embrace rather than subvert patriarchy? Or maybe I'm taking this too seriously.
October 19, 2006
Question for the New York Times
I know why you run photographs like this:
I know why you titled the associated article: "Good Girls Go Bad, for a Day." What I don't understand is why the caption beneath the picture is: POST-POST-POST-FEMINISM?
October 17, 2006
From the Department of The Rich Are Different
October 16, 2006
Blog Lightening!
Make your own here. Via Pen-Elayne.
October 15, 2006
Paint On A Wall
"Teen pays siblings' college fees by selling virtual weapons"
According to this CNET News article:
Mike Everest, a home-schooled high school senior from Durango, Colo., has put two of his siblings through college by selling virtual goods for real dollars on Entropia. And he's not the only one involved. His mother also plays the game. Along with his mother, Everest, better-known within the virtual game as Ogulak Da Basher on the planet Calypso, has raked in more than $35,000. Of that profit, $12,000 will be used to help his two siblings attend college.
Via Anupam Chander.
October 14, 2006
Carnival of the Creators
I just discovered the Carnival of the Creators:
Carnival of the Creators is a weekly collection of links to blog posts about creative people and their work. They may be artists, craftspeople, novelists, musicians - in fact anyone who creates something original.
The October edition is here.
Look at the time.
Cartoon by Natalie Dee.
October 12, 2006
Star Wars Powerpoint
Here. Via Pen-Elayne.
A fully functional PC stuffed into an old newspaper vending machine.
From here.
October 11, 2006
Twist and Shout
The videos posted on YouTube and other online video venues by U.S. soldiers have caused copyright controversy and outrage about depictions of sometimes graphic violence or callousness toward Iraqi citizens. Here's a soldier's video that everyone can enjoy, although not all of them will believe that it's actually for real.
Cooking With Feminists
Gloria Steinem and Jane Fonda went on the Colbert Report to publicize their Greenstone Media radio network. An unrelated two part interview with author Ariel Levy is available at the same URL. (NB: This is the show's "most recent video" page; eventually the search function might be necessary to locate these clips.)
October 10, 2006
Split Personality
The Los Angeles Times can't figure out how it feels about file-sharing apparently. In an article today on piracy campaigns that target Christian teens on behalf of the Christian music industry, "Pirating Songs of Praise," the Times refers to both "stealing and swapping" music in one section, and how these young people "take and share songs" in another. Are they stealing or swapping? Are they taking or sharing? The Times doesn't seem to know for sure.
The article does give some credence to the argument that file-sharing builds the name recognition of artists and ultimately boosts sales, but it doesn't take seriously questions about how intellectual property itself can be reified in our current "Culture of the Copy," even though its own language shows considerable ambivalence about the the concept.
The LAT Times story also didn't get into some of the trickier issues that it could have pursued when it raised the contradiction of "Spread the Word" and "Thou Shalt Not Steal." By inserting discourses about theft, they've missed the real opposition at work. Religions must evangelize to survive and must disseminate their messages widely and freely, but many faiths also depend on hierachical systems based on secret knowledge. Thus the Scientologists don't want their holiest scriptures on the Internet, and the Vatican has begun copyrighting the official speeches and writings of the Pope.
Copyrighting Grandma's Recipes
There's an interesting article in Food and Wine about haute cuisine, patent law, and charges of plagiarism being hurled at rogue chefs that's definitely food for thought. "Recipe Burglar" describes how restaurant patrons may now be confronted with more intellectual property legal notices on the menu.
Shaw told me he hoped to convene a summit meeting with some of the smartest people in the food world to hammer out a workable model for copyrighting food. First, he’d propose changing the copyright code, possibly by making cuisine a subdivision of the existing category for sculpture or acknowledging recipes as a form of literary expression. For enforcement, Shaw leans toward creating a system like ASCAP, an association that collects composers’ royalties for public performances of songs—on the radio, in nightclubs and so on...
I wonder what people who study globalization and food history, like my Core Course colleague Yong Chen, will make of this new assault on free culture.
October 9, 2006
Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox
A documentary film by Sara Lamm:
Dr. Emanuel Bronner was a master soapmaker, self-proclaimed rabbi, and, allegedly, Albert Einstein's nephew.
In 1947, after escaping from a mental institution, he invented the formula for "Dr. Bronner's Magic Soap," a peppermint-infused, all-natural, multi-purpose liquid that can be found today in every American health food store. On each bottle of his soap, he printed an ever-evolving set of teachings he called "The Moral ABC," designed, in his words, "TO UNITE ALL MANKIND FREE!"
A human story about a socially responsible company, "Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox" documents the complicated family legacy behind the counterculture's favorite cleaning product -- Bronner's son, 68-year-old Ralph, endured over 15 orphanages and foster homes as a child, but despite difficult memories, is his father's most ardent fan...
Trailer here.
Uh Oh.
Google To Acquire YouTube for $1.65 Billion in Stock. What will this mean for Extreme Pogo Man? Or the Zidane Headbutt Remix?
October 8, 2006
"Because there was none left in the pantry"
Swiped from Dooce:
Funny Faux Movie Trailer
October 7, 2006
Grrr.
The picture is from here, and while I wasn't personally inconvenienced by it, we have some drivers around here that do the same annoying thing.
What Does the "Best Boy" Do?
Find out by listening to Biff's Question Song
Elevator Illusion
This is freaky and may inspire bad dreams.
October 5, 2006
Experts Say Copyright May Be Bad for You
The British Academy has released a report that contends "that the copyright system may in important respects be impeding, rather than stimulating, the production of new ideas and new scholarship in the humanities and social sciences." You can read the executive summary and the report itself. (Thanks to Steve Franklin and Maureen Burns for the heads up.)
October 4, 2006
Brought to You by the Department of Irony
From the Trademark Blog comes this news that, after a hard-fought legal battle over trademark infringement, a firm now owns the rights to that highly respected name "Foley," as of today. (Thanks to Ed Swaine for this fun fact.)
October 3, 2006
Free Font Manifesto
Ellen Lupton, a well-known graphic design professor and curator for the Cooper-Hewitt National Design Museum, has just posted a Free Font Manifesto. The movement also has its own blog.
Here is a sample of Lupton's argument for what is almost a form of educational fair use:
Currently, most fonts created in the open source spirit are produced for small or underserved linguistic populations. Such fonts are “good” in the moral sense. In the future, designers may choose to make free fonts in the service of other social needs as well. For example, in developing countries graphic designers who seek to build a typographic culture in their home regions require more than a bare-minimum typographic vocabulary, and they often rely on pirated typefaces to do so. A richer selection of legitimate free fonts, clearly labelled and promoted as such in an educational way, might help to build respect for the larger commercial ecology of typeface design.
October 2, 2006
Sex Toys Under Texas Law
September 30, 2006
Brilliant Analog Mash-up
Man vows to fight garden gnome arrest threat
A man vowed to keep a glowing garden gnome on display today in defiance of a police notice. Gordon MacKillop even faces possible prosecution over the offending ornament.
He was woken in the night by two police officers who warned him that the solar-powered gnome, dressed in full police uniform, was offensive to his neighbours.
They served him with a notice under the Protection From Harassment Act 1997 for "placing a garden gnome with intent to cause harassment to Mr John McLean".
Read the rest here.
September 29, 2006
The Stephen Colbert "On Notice Board" Generator
Make your own here. Feel free to mock law professors!
September 28, 2006
How Much is that Doggie in the Window Able to Do about Copyright?
Meet "Lucky" and "Flo," two Labrador Retrievers in the media spotlight. Yesterday, the Los Angeles Times in "Hollywood's Latest Weapon" reported that the MPAA has trained these dogs in the art of DVD-sniffing in the hope of sussing out possible pirated goods among imported merchandise. Apparently a DVD has a distinctive odor, just like prohibited food items or illegal drugs. The story was also picked up by the Washington Post, which reported that the pair was trained by a master who had previously prepared his charges for bomb-sniffing duties in Northern Ireland. Of course, the dogs can't distinguish between legitimately produced DVD shipments and ones that contain illegal goods. A dog-fancier website reveals that the canine duo should have their tails between their legs, since they have been working at a Federal Express shipping center in the UK, where -- to the chagrin of their handlers -- they have succeeded in having several packages unnecessarily opened but have yet to catch any actual copyright offenders.
Top 176 Star Wars Lines Improved By Replacing A Word With "Pants"
Channel your inner child here, because: "It is pointless to resist the power of the dark pants..."
This is why Weird Al is still alive!
See also Amish Paradise:
September 26, 2006
Meaningless Songs In Very High Voices
September 25, 2006
Do The Four Part Trick
See this cartoon character, who is vaguely reminiscent of the Hamburger Helper factotum? It's "Henry the Hand."
Click here to hear his retro "Four Part Trick" theme song! Try not to giggle when the narrator says "Number two," because that would be very immature. Did you know that December 3rd-9th, 2006 was "National Handwashing Week"? Henry The Hand has a job! It is reflected in his eponymous website's mission statement:
To propagate Henry the Hand's 4 Principles of Hand Awareness throughout the United States and the world, if we have enough resouces, just for the health of it.
1) WASH your hands when they are dirty and BEFORE eating.
2) DO NOT cough into your hands.
3) DO NOT sneeze into your hands.
4) Above all, DO NOT put your fingers into your eyes, nose or mouth!
Anything else you want to do with your hands, however, is just fine.
Update: You can also listen to "Doin' the Handwash" which is a musical abomination that rhymes "dirty" and "wordy" to the tune of "Willie and the Hand Jive." Frankly I think Johnny Otis has a cognizable legal claim here, if not for copyright infringement than surely for defamation.
September 23, 2006
Make Your Own Poster!
I'm applying for Abstinence Only funding for this one! Make your own here, once again via Pen-Elayne.
September 22, 2006
Warning Signs
September 21, 2006
Google Earth Maps Nude Sunbather
September 19, 2006
We Have A Tech Guy With This Tie
Funny Tattoo
From here.
September 16, 2006
Human Interest Story
Yesterday, the always excellent NPR reporter David Folkenflik reported on how the FCC had quashed its own report on media consolidation, because the study it commissioned -- contrary to the administration's pro-business claims -- showed that local news coverage was negatively impacted by corporate ownership of multiple media channels in the same regional market. According to the Los Angeles Times article "FCC Lawyer Says TV Study Was Hushed," no one at the FCC seems eager to take responsibility for burying the results that demonstrated a statistically significant effect from media consolidation, measured in the loss of about five minutes of local news coverage in a typical broadcast once the corporate giants take over.
The original 2004 report is now posted on the FCC website. The charts and graphs at the back leave something to be desired, but the basic information design of the report makes the point pretty clearly. The Chairman's apology for the cover-up, addressed to Senator Barbara Boxer, which is also on the FCC site, is a remarkably tepid document and seems about as sincere as the apologies issued by telecommunication companies and Internet Service Providers after they've forced their customers to endure endless waiting for shoddy service.
(Take that Verizon, Earthlink, Time Warner, and all of the carriers who have made blogging this month a nightmare. I'm not going to post audio clips or video clips, like other dissatisfied customers, but I'm pretty tempted to use this forum for the purpose of complaining about the farce that passes for broadband service in the United States. See the muckraking of the New Networks Institute to learn how we are all actually paying for the privilege of monopolistic abuse with our taxpayer dollars. Lucky us!)
Math Based Humor
September 15, 2006
Friday Afternoon Sacreligious Procrastination Link
September 12, 2006
Vintage Drug Ads
Law Professor Prerogatives
If any students wear these shirts to class, I am going to call on them mercilessly.
September 9, 2006
If You Can't Make It To Church On Sunday, You Could Always Listen To This Song Instead
It's a little twangy, but at least no collection plate will pass. Not work safe, damn it all to hell. Via Nancy at Heavens to Mergatroyd.
September 8, 2006
How to find confidential reports with Google?
Per Boing Boing, if you Google the phrase "Confidential do not distribute” you will find some interesting things you probably aren't supposed to see.
September 5, 2006
I Don't Often Covet Articles of Clothing
But I want this Sock Monkey Dress!
September 3, 2006
This Looks Kind of Fun
See No Evil
If you live in a large, metropolitan area, try to catch This Film is Not Yet Rated while it is still in theaters. Much of the film's subject matter may not be a surprise: the way that the ratings system operates in secrecy with a board of supposedly typical parents, the fact that in practice this system discriminates against gay and lesbian film-makers and censors portrayals of homosexual life and female pleasure, and the generally poor historical record of the MPAA on civil liberties, collective bargaining, economic competition, free culture, and the prevention of violence, particularly against women.
What's original about the film is the literal detective work done to reveal the identities of the MPAA's shadowy group of "mainstream" moralists, which is led by a registered Republican and Jack Valenti appointee. I thought the resourceful PI hired by the documentary-maker is really the heroine of the film. Hilarity also ensues when director Kirby Dick submits his film to the MPAA to be rated, and the board discovers that their names and images have been leaked to the public. Although the section on "piracy," isn't well integrated into the film, there's also some good Lawrence Lessig footage as well. Unfortunately, the MPAA's own unauthorized copying of this critical documentary didn't make it into the cut I saw.
If you're still in a hating mood about censorship, you can also check out the much cruder FCC FU video that was plugged this week on IP Democracy.
September 2, 2006
If You Laugh At This You Are A Terrible, Horrible Person, Like Me
Cook County prosecutors say a 29-year-old man traveling with his mother desperately didn't want her to know he'd packed a sexual aid for their trip to Turkey. So he told security it was a bomb, officials said.
Madin Azad Amin, 29, of Skokie, was stopped Aug. 16 at O'Hare International Airport after guards found an object in his baggage that resembled a grenade, prosecutors said. When officers asked him to identify it, Amin said it was a bomb, said Cook County Assistant State's Attorney Lorraine Scaduto.
He later told officials he'd lied about the item because his mother was nearby and he didn't want her to hear that it was part of a penis pump, Scaduto said. He's been charged with felony disorderly conduct, said Andrew Conklin, a spokesman with the Cook County state's attorney's office.
Amin's attorney told a Cook County judge Wednesday that Amin whispered that the component was a "pump." The guard misunderstood, and thought he said "bomb," according to defense attorney Eileen O'Neill-Burke.
"He told her it's a pump," O'Neill-Burke said. "He's standing with his mother. Of course he's not going to shout this out."
However, Judge Gerald Winiecki decided there was sufficient evidence for the case to move forward after the female security guard testified that she heard Amin "clearly" say the word bomb. Amin is charged with felony disorderly conduct, which could bring a three-year prison sentence if he's convicted. Amin is due back in court Sept. 13. He told the Chicago Sun-Times after the hearing that security officials did not give him a chance to explain the misunderstanding, that he would never use the word "bomb" while going through a security checkpoint, and does not consider a penis pump an unusual object to own.
"It's normal," he said. "Half of America they use it."
Via Blackfeminism.org.
Colbert (Correctly) Mocks Georgia About Its Inferior Peach Production
From The State:
Stephen Colbert struck another blow for truthiness on “The Colbert Report,” this time in defense of South Carolina peaches.
On his Aug. 24 Comedy Central show, Colbert dissed Georgia for laying claim to being “The Peach State,” as South Carolina consistently outproduces its neighbor when it comes to the peach crop.
Colbert, a Charleston native and sharp satirist, described National Peach Month, which is in August, as “30 days of simmering resentment” because of “the fraud perpetrated by Georgia.”
An amused South Carolina Department of Agriculture Commissioner Hugh Weathers appreciated Colbert’s biting wit in defending South Carolina’s status and for quoting the ag department on the state’s peaches in which “the sugar level is superb.”
Weathers admitted Georgia got the jump on South Carolina “when it came to marketing. Georgia got the label (‘The Peach State’) years ago.”
Weathers considered the possibility of issuing some kind of challenge or wager to Georgia, but he pointed out that Georgia’s Secretary of Agriculture, Tommy Irvin, is “a big guy. He’s about six-foot-six. But I think I could still take him.”
South Carolina is the country’s second top producer of peaches behind California — a state that makes many claims but does not often brag about peaches.
South Carolina Department of Agriculture spokeswoman Becky Walton said South Carolina occasionally falls out of second place as a peach producer (and possibly behind Georgia) if weather conditions and marketing are off. But she quickly recovered South Carolina’s honor by acknowledging, “We do have the tastier peach.”
Colbert suggested Georgia change its license plate motto to: “The Burned To The Ground By Sherman State.” Perhaps South Carolina might consider dropping “Smiling Faces, Beautiful Places” for “The Tastier Peach State.”
"gimmyabreakopoloy"
Ruminations on the new ad campaign of The-Product-Which-Shall-Not-Be-Named at Everyday Life.
August 31, 2006
Feminist Graffito
Via Jessica at Feministing. See more examples here.
August 30, 2006
Selling Books In Canada
Does This Seem Homophobic To You?
August 29, 2006
Free Downloadable Music, Supported By Advertising
< sarcasm > Wow, wonder why no one else ever thought of that. < /sarcasm >
Lowering The Tone For A Moment
Here is an excerpt from the TSA's list of "Permitted and Prohibited Items" for air travel:
"To ensure the health and welfare of certain air travelers the following items are permitted.
* Small amounts of Baby formula and breast milk if a baby or small child is traveling
* Liquid prescription medicine with a name that matches the passenger’s ticket
* Up to 5 oz. (148ml) of liquid or gel low blood sugar treatment
* Up to 4 oz. of essential non-prescription liquid medications including saline solution, eye care products and KY jelly
* Gel-filled bras and similar prostethics
* Gel-filled wheelchair cushions
* Life support and life sustaining liquids such as bone marrow, blood products, and transplant organs carried for medical reasons" ...
Any one else find one of those items a tiny bit, um, incongruous? I don't mean the bras, either.
August 28, 2006
August 26, 2006
How To Fold A Shirt
August 24, 2006
From here, via Everyday
From here, via Everyday Life.
Lost and Found In Translation
Algorithm for lyrical distortion:
1. Randomly pick a song from your music library.
2. Find the lyrics for the first four verses/chorus.
3. Go to Google Translation and translate the lyrics from English into German.
4. Take the new German lyrics and translate them into French.
5. Take the new French lyrics and translate them into English.
6. Post the new English lyrics and have people guess the original song.
Here is my entry:
CARRIED WITH OPERATION
The day we sweat him in the roads of an American dream to cross which we go by the villas of famous in the apparatuses of suicide, on road 9 to be resulted outside the night outside, to chromium we are turned, the fuel injected and steppin on the line baby this city outside the bones of your back are to him a trap of death, him of reality Selbstmordpochen we break received to leave, while we are young `causes tramps like us, the baby we were that born, to make the executives run
Wendy left me, inside which me your friend I would like to be would like your dreams and sights to protect packing right your legs 'with the entour these Samtkanten and your hands on my apparatuses belts we could break this trap together to run us, until we fall, with the baby who we never go from return will go you with me on control because baby are me outside frightened Mitfahrer and only me precisely however received, to discover, as it believes me would like to know, if the love is wild girl I wanted to know, if the love is true
Beyond the palate cries bumblebees hemi-angetriebene to the bottom the road of luxury which the girls comb and test the boys their hair in rearview the mirrors, to look at so hard the park of entertainment increases kids on the beach in a fog is in a hurry grassement and rigid I would not like to die this evening with you Wendy on the roads accumulated in kiss
Of the road with of Heldern defective on a last fortuitous device control of each one on the race gives him eternally outside this evening however of place to dissimulate on the left of Wendy together to him live us with Traurigkeit with all Verrücktheit in my one girls day heart know me I love you not when we become in this place to come where we would like to really go and we go to the sun then tramps as we it baby were however us carried with operation.
Answer here.
August 23, 2006
"Hot Library Smut"
Here. Work safe, unless the pix cause you to drool on your keyboard and electrocute yourself.
Lucy Pringle's Crop Circle Photograph Library.
Here, via Pen-Elayne.
August 22, 2006
I Love Weird Al
I know, I know, but if you get a chance, see him in concert, you will have a lot of fun, no matter how much you try to resist his parodic charms. He's incredible talented, and he's a copyright subversive! Also, don't download this song!
Snakes At The Firm
This is cold. But funny. But cold. Reptilian, even.
From Ishkur.com, via Brad
From Ishkur.com, via Brad DeLong, via Froomkin.
August 21, 2006
Winners!
Read the story behind this photo of boat race victors here at Indian Writing.
Madonna v. Jessica
August 17, 2006
Bonus Comic: Lockhorns Deconstruction
From The Comics Curmudgeon, via Heavens to Mergatroyd.
Which Is More Unlikely?
A bikini model who is also an engineer?
Or a mainstream comic strip that doesn't take cheap shots at women?
August 16, 2006
Zombie Letters
Zombie Letters from e-zombie.com
Via Rox Populi.
August 14, 2006
PepsiCo Names New Female Chief Executive
Indra K. Nooyi, currently Pepsi's chief financial officer, is being promoted to chief executive. The NYT story is here, and it does not mention her marital status or whether she has children, which is interesting.
Sorkin's New Show: "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip"
And the cast?
Matthew Perry
Bradley Whitford
Amanda Peet
Steven Weber
Sarah Paulson
D.L. Hughley
Nathan Corddry
Evan Handler
Carlos Jacott
Timothy Busfield
Mostly white, and mostly male.
August 13, 2006
Mash-Up Media
The venerable Washington Post is sponsoring a video mash-up contest this month. Advice to possible contestants: choose a public figure who moves his or her head very little while talking (such as George W. Bush or Donald Trump), visit the WaPo official mash-up center, and read the newspaper's own summary of principles at "Art and Marketing All Mashed Up." The mash-up I'd suggest for the mock interview with reporter Dana Milbank: Federal website cartoon mascots.
Another mash-up I'd like to see: Ted Stevens rambling comments about the Internet cut together to make sense as a coherent argument.
August 12, 2006
"Fashion’s Cutthroat Edge"
Feminist Law Professor Susan Scafidi got a nice mention in today's NYT, as follows:
For about a decade, Susan Scafidi, an associate law professor at Southern Methodist University, maintained a file on the fashion industry in her office “and the latest Vogue hidden in my briefcase,” she writes on her blog, Counterfeit Chic (counterfeitchic.com).
For most of that time, “fashion seemed a little too cutting-edge for the ivory tower,” she writes. But now, “with a multimillion-dollar counterfeits crisis and the new challenge of fast fashion, it’s time to come out of the closet!”
The blog shows just how action-packed the counterfeit situation has become. Most days, Ms. Scafidi posts one or two items to which she lends some in-depth, knowledgeable commentary. And each week, she posts a long list of newsy links to articles and blog posts from across the globe about police stings, internecine industry battles and efforts by both governments and fashion houses to somehow stem the flood of knockoffs.
When it comes to intellectual property, media piracy gets most of the attention, she notes, but fashion fakery is also highly costly for producers and has been around a lot longer.
There are big differences between them, thanks to what Ms. Scafidi calls “the culture of the copy” within the fashion industry, which is far different from the music and movie industries.
“The history of fashion is a tale of innovation, but also of imitation,” she writes. “Trendsetters create and embrace new styles, but without copycats there would be no trends. This paradox lies at the heart of Counterfeit Chic.”
Until recently, intellectual property law generally stayed away from fashion. Ms. Scafidi examines the legal trends, but also “the cognitive and sociological reasons that make us want to buy or reject knockoffs in the first place.”
“It’s about political and legal developments,” she writes, “but also about why both technological efforts and the social norms of the fashion industry continue to be more effective than law in supporting creativity.”
August 11, 2006
The Geography of Slavery In Virginia
Chilling Effects
There's a great new white paper out from the Berkman Center for the Internet and Society at Harvard, "The Digital Learning Challenge: Obstacles to Educational Uses of Copyrighted Material in the Digital Age." It documents how the TEACH Act has been ineffective at calming the fears of litigation-wary administrators and how teachers are missing pedagogical opportunities to share rich primary sources with students, in convenient digital form, because they work in an environment of copyright cowardice. The paper also says that fears of DMCA orders are also driving many campuses toward closed course management tools with proprietary software from firms like Web CT or Blackboard, so that institutions of higher education would be even more separated from the public sphere (and permanently saddled with packages that constrain electronic educational environments). Check out the open source Sakai Project for an alternative approach to course management tools.
This paper is a must read for anyone interested in either teaching or intellectual property issues.
August 8, 2006
Recycling Campaign
From Tom Tomorrow.
August 7, 2006
A Deleted Piece of The Wizard of Oz
This is "behind the camera" footage of the Jitterbug scene that went lost after being cut from the film. The film originally contained an elaborate production number called "The Jitter Bug", which cost $80,000 and took five weeks to shoot. In the scene, Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Cowardly lion, and the Tin Woodsman are on their way to the Witch's castle when they are attacked by "jitter bugs" - furry pink and blue mosquito-like "rascals" that give one "the jitters" as they buzz about in the air. When, after its first preview, the movie was judged too long, MGM officials decided to sacrifice the "Jitter Bug" scene. They reasoned that it added little to the plot and, because a dance by the same name had just become popular, they feared it might date the picture. The Witch still refers to the bug in the final film, just before telling the Monkeys to "Fly!" Only home movies of the filming of "The Jitterbug" survive, though the song is on current versions of both the soundtrack CD and the recent anniversary edition videotape. The sequence was also incorporated into a recent stage version of the musical.
Star Trek Sings Knights of the Round Table
Rickie Lee Jones Asks: "Have You Had Enough?"
Song here. Via Crooks and Liars.
August 6, 2006
academicsecret
Wikipedia Round-Up
There has been a lot of Wikipedia coverage of late, which I'll try to condense into one post.
For starters, New Yorker readers can appreciate the Annals of Information piece, "Know It All," which delves into the bureaucracy and social dynamics of the organization. According to a recent Los Angeles Times article, "Divine Inspiration From the Masses," this approach is influencing all realms of human knowledge from science to religion. The LAT also ran an Op-Ed piece, "Why Wiki Can Drive You Wacky." There was a story in the Associated Press, which was picked up by Wired, about founder Jimmy Wales' desire to focus right now on quality not quantity. See "Toward a Better Wikipedia" for details about the planned changes, which include a more user-friendly interface with less code for novices to grapple with.
For those who want to see some more substantive criticism, take a while to ponder "Digital Maoism: The Hazards of the New Online Collectivism," which takes the celebration of the hive mentality to task. Then check out "Can History Be Open Source? Wikipedia and the Future of the Past" from the Center for History and New Media at George Mason University (the people who brought us the excellent student-friendly Liberty, Equality, Fraternity: Exploring the French Revolution).
Stephen Colbert also weighs in on Wikipedia via YouTube. You can see him spar with an angry Wikipedian as well.
(Thanks to my UCI colleague Ellen Strenski for the running tally. Check out her tongue-in-cheek "Glossary for New Graduate Students," if you've never seen her send up of pseudo-intellectual jargon.)
August 4, 2006
Statue of "Liberation Through Christ"
NYT account here.
August 3, 2006
New Bedfellows
According to the Chronicle of Higher Education, Google is pursuing the library holdings of my own employer, the University of California. Details at "U. of California Is in Talks to Join Google's Library-Scanning Project."
10 Principles for the Digital Family
Yesterday, I filled in for cultural conservative and public personality David Walsh of The National Institute on Media and the Family on the SIGGRAPH panel on "Video Games: Content and Responsibility," when Walsh ducked the opportunity for dialogue with makers of digital content because of a "scheduling conflict."
So I should be well-qualified to make my own official list of "cyber-safety" tips.
1) Play with Your Child
Dr. Spock revolutionized child care a half-century ago by stating that the first rule to new parents should be "enjoy your baby." With longer workdays for parents and ramped up expectations in school and society for kids, it can be easy to forget to play with them as they get older. Your personal preference may be to have your child cream you in chess rather than in a first-person shooter, but if you aren't willing to play digitally, you are likely to be widening the generation gap. There are lots of good, less-publicized choices out there. Consider something like the award-winning, fun-for-all-ages game Cloud from students at USC and their faculty advisor Tracy Fullerton, which can be downloaded free and played on a home computer. Should you already own a game controller, the Japanese game Katamari Damacy only requires you to invest a Jackson in this nonviolent but genuinely wacky family-friendly game. If you are intimidated by videogames, explore other opportunities for creative play. For starters, you could have fun with music-making machines like Pâte à Son from le ciel est bleu or the Indian Shankar Drum Ganesh Machine, or a paint animation like Jackson Pollock by Miton Manetas.
2) Go Low Budget
You don't need to spend thousands of dollars on expensive controllers, games, and software for digital family fun. A megabucks game from a Hollywood franchise might not bring you any closer to your child. Instead, consider these four options.
A. Free open source software that lets your kids create games, animations, movies, and audio remixes like the 3-D modeling program Blender or the sound mixing program Audacity.
B. Free 30-day-trials of otherwise expensive corporate packages. Kids can make elaborate animated cartoons for the web and cell phones with Flash or make music with Sony Acid, although they may complain when the month is up.
C. For less than the cost of a typical sixty dollar game, your kids can make their own games. Quest Creator, RPG Maker, and -- for the lover of virtual gore or mayhem -- FPS Creator are all within most family budgets.
D. Check out what comes with the machine. For example, a lot of Macs come with the versatile program iMovie.
3) Bring Digital Politics to the Dinner Table
Talk to your kids about new laws that limit or may limit users' digital rights. It's important that they understand the basics of copyright law and why they can't post their clever claymation video on YouTube or MySpace, if the soundtrack is a top ten hit owned by a megamedia company.
Luckily Creative Commons makes it possible for kids to find photos, sound samples, and film clips in the public domain. (Check out this video made by my thirteen-year-old to see an example.)
You might also want to point out how the arcane and obfuscatory language in user agreements can contain fine print that allows their personal information to be shared with third parties. Game playing devices can also store data from other software applications.
4) Be an Adbuster
The largely hidden issue about digital media is the insidious role that advertising can play with in-game advertising, viral marketing campaigns, and other stealth strategies to push consumerism on the young. To get conversation going, you can show kids funny and/or dumb examples of corporate websites, such as Subservient Chicken from Burger King, Hurra Torpedo from Ford, and I am Asian from McDonald's.
5) Distrust Ratings
Ratings systems, even the most well-meaning ones, may not give you as much useful information as a Google search. They may be better than nothing, but often they are not much better. For example, even though it is saddled with an "R" rating, the film Billy Elliot can be wonderful family viewing for older kids who might be inspired by the story of a working class British boy who endures ridicule because he pursues his talent for ballet. At the same time, many wildly inappropriate movies for children are labeled PG-13. Unfortunately, parents' groups that do more credible non-industry ratings sometimes are so focused on negative reviews that they overlook the positive ones. For example, the popular fitness-oriented game Dance Dance Revolution doesn't have a KidScore review.
6) Raise the Issue of Inappropriate Behavior Appropriately
Of course, we should talk to our kids about creepy adults, but we need to remember that most pedophiles still exploit face-to-face interactions far more commonly than chatrooms, online multiplayer game spaces, or social networking websites. That's not to say that there aren't potentially yucky encounters to be had on even innocuous sites like Runescape, but too much talk about "stranger danger" may not encourage your children to protect themselves against those who are nearer and dearer and more likely to abuse their power as adults. It's also important to include threatening and harrassing behavior that is non-sexual in the dialogue. Kids may be more willing to talk if you elicit their responses to your own experiences as a child with inappropriate behavior from adults.
7) Consider a Computer in the Kitchen
Julia Lupton, of Design-Your-Life, discusses the value of having a computer in the public space of the house, so that family members can collaborate on digital projects easily. Of course, teens need to have some opportunities for privacy to build trust. Reading e-mail and spying on their web surfing may be as counterproductive as perusing diary entries or listening in on telephone conversations.
8) Know the Limits of Educational Games
Even the best educational videogame or software program is inferior to the best live teaching. Although a lot of interesting work on games and literacy has been done by James Paul Gee, Henry Jenkins, Kurt Squire, and Constance Steinkuehler, it's important to be aware that kids may already be getting too much distance in their learning from schools that are increasingly oriented around scripted teaching and multiple choice tests. In other words, before you park your kid in front of the latest wonder from the Scholastic corporation, plan a trip to a museum, science center, historical site, concert hall, or library.
9) Set Boundaries
As the parent, you are entitled to make the house rules. This means you can specify the equipment to which your children have access or the hours they spend in front of a computer screen.
10) Wear Your Heart on Your Sleeve
No matter how you became a parent, you chose to have children because you love them. Older teens may be embarrassed by such signs of affection, but showing your kids that you love them benefits them for a lifetime. Digital media allow for opportunities to remind your kids that you think about them every day. The occasional e-mail with a funny link or Photoshopped image, goofy instant message, out-of-the-blue care package from an online vendor, or dorky custom designed t-shirt can create moments of celebration to supplement more traditional expressions of interest like hugs and chats with the denizens of the backseat. It shouldn't take the place of kicking around the soccer ball or making homemade chocolate chip cookies, but contemporary life can create certain kinds of distance that technology can bridge.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
Smack About Mac
Over at Center of Gravitas, Gayprof has this to say about Apple's new Mac commercials (which you can watch here but why would you want to?):
Mac wants to pretend that they are not a giant U.S. corporation guilty of all the excesses therein. Some people feel so invested in Mac that they will even become angry if you dare to suggest that they are just another consumer option. Thus, I am annoyed by the smug, self-satisfied ad campaign for Mac computers. You have probably not been able to avoid them unless your doctor or a criminal court ordered you to stay at least 75 feet from all television sets. These ads involve a “PC” and a “Mac” computer personified with actors. The Mac tries so hard to seem “cool,” but just ends up looking like one of my annoying-know-it-all freshmen students. Mac, the corporation, tries to convince the public that buying their computer will permit them to be part of a special group of people. I see this ad and think that Mac computers clearly lack manners.
As I have said many times, though, the Mac mystique is really just capitalist brand-identification. If one finds the Mac computer works better for their particular needs, I think that is just dandy. Owning a Mac as some type of evidence of innate cleverness, though? In the immortal words of Shania, that don’t impress me much.
These ads, if anything, make me unlikely to even think of buying a Mac for many years. The next time that smug little Mac brat appears on my television, friends might need to restrain me from tossing the whole set against a wall. I would not want that Mac guy in my house, much less working as my computer.
I was really pleased to have a female salesperson when I bought my iBook last year, because I’ve been patronized and insulted by a lot of annoying techie men over the years, but so far never by a techie woman. She was the only woman on the floor at that Apple shop while I was making my purchase, which I think was a huge mistake, given all the women who were in there buying computers. But obviously the whole company is geared towards men, which the new ad campaign reinforces. Maybe I should just be grateful that no one tried to sell me a pink fluffy scented laptop, right?
Yet Another iPod Accessory
The OhMiBod.
August 1, 2006
Scene From An "English Only" Protest
From here.
July 30, 2006
Why I Should Have Stopped Reading the NYT After Happily Noting The Lamont Endorsement
I went on to accidentally read "The Untucked Country Club", an advertisement posing as a news article about a country club for golfers who do not like to tuck in their shirts. Here is an excerpt:
And forget about blue blazers. At the Bridge backward ball caps, jeans and even tattoos or face piercings (typically on guests in the music business) attract no steely stares.
In short, the Bridge — despite $600,000 membership fees, which make it one of the most expensive clubs in the country — is an anti-country club of sorts. It is not just the first high-end club in America that dares to be hip but, seemingly, the first one that cares to be hip.
Here's another:
“There are a whole lot of guys who make a hundred million a year, but they are anonymous,” Mr. Ferris said. “So they look for ways to reinforce their presence in the world.” Joining the Bridge, he said, is “another way to say to the world who they are, because most of these guys work at 4-foot-wide desks.” He added: “It says ‘I’m hip. I’m out there.’ ”
Yeesh. If I "made a hundred million a year" and was "look[ing] for ways to reinforce [my] presence in the world," I think I could come up with something better than joining a golf club.
July 29, 2006
You Got Your Savior In My Peanut Butter!
Think Hershey's will bring a trademark suit? Nope, me neither. Story and more tee shirt photos at Pam's House Blend.
July 28, 2006
Clip Art Loop
Copyright Comix
Captain Copyright versus The Pig and the Box.
See also "Bound By Law?"
Star Wars Theme Played On A Banjo
July 27, 2006
MS Office Upgrade, With Important New Features
More here. Cuss words ahoy. Via Pen-Elayne.
Salad Days
Hey, the Sivacracy site meter passed 200,000!
July 26, 2006
Survey Says
Last week the Pew Internet & American Life Project released its most recent report on blogging. From their survey, researchers discovered that bloggers were actually a more ethnically diverse group than Internet users as a whole, that they devoted an average of two hours a week to the activity, and that they were more likely to focus blog content on family interests or informal social networks than “politics, media, government, or technology.”
Academic bloggers might be a somewhat different species from these lay bloggers in the Pew Report, because they often see their blogging as a type of journalism, as a form of scholarly commentary on the news, or as a way to work out ideas for upcoming books or articles.
Yet bloggers inside the Ivory Tower and outside in the Real World may have more in common with each other than they do with the rest of the slightly more normally adjusted population. So here are the questions that I would have liked to have seen researchers ask of my fellow bloggers:
- How much weight have you gained since you started blogging?
- Do you ever dream about blogging?
- When you are hungry, do you ever read food blogs rather than get up from the computer?
- When you feel faint from inertia, do you ever read blogs about nature and the outdoors rather than get up from the computer?
- What is the most embarrassing time signature that has ever appeared on one of your blog entries? (e.g. middle of the night, spouse’s birthday, Christmas morning, New Year’s Eve, etc.)
- Do you not publish unsolicited poetry out of principle so that you can feel like a real editor?
- Do you ever post a comment from a Viagra company out of boredom?
- According to your regular reader(s), what vast conspiracy have you most often neglected to mention in your regular coverage of events in your life?
My UCI colleague Bonnie Nardi's 2004 Why We Blog looked at a smaller, more rarified group of Stanford bloggers but found a similar emphasis on the personal rather than the political. She also recorded the fact that the modal number of comments (or most common digit) was "0" on the blogs she studied.
July 25, 2006
Who Owns History?
The LA News Service is suing YouTube over footage of the beating of truck driver Reginald Denny during the 1992 Los Angeles Riots. The stock film company is claiming copyright infringement by the video service that solicits content via a distributed network model. (If you have questions about their user agreement, this shirtless man in a cowboy hat will explain your rights as a YouTube user.)
The Denny beating is a tumultuous event that I feel connected to as a witness to history, because I was only a few city blocks away while it was happening, and rocks were even thrown at my car (luckily by kids with either lousy aim or sympathy for my bumper stickers).
The problem is that if one wanted to show the Reginald Denny beating in a university classroom legitimately -- perhaps to talk about "digital evidence" or to contrast it with footage of the beating of Rodney King by police officers, which was one of the events that set the fuse of the civil disturbance -- it would be hard to do. The LA News Service just has a provisional lorum ipsum dolor site up at the moment.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
Away From Home Movies
MTV News claims that "System, Korn, Staind Don't Mind Their Music Being Used in Iraq Soldiers' Viral Videos" that combine copyrighted music with footage from the frontlines.
You can check out their grunt's eye perspective in the songs "Iraq (So Far Away)" and "Dead Bodies Everywhere." "So Far Away" is a nostalgic reflection about home from the front lines, while "Dead Bodies Everywhere" emphasizes explosions and third-person style shooter play.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
July 24, 2006
It's Called the "Mosquito" And It's Annoying Even Though I Can't Hear It
From a CBS News article entitled A New Ring Tone Teachers Can't Hear:
Students are using a new ring tone to receive messages in class — and many teachers can't even hear the ring. Some students are downloading a ring tone off the Internet that is too high-pitched to be heard by most adults. With it, high schoolers can receive text message alerts on their cell phones without the teacher knowing.
As people age, many develop what's known as aging ear — a loss of the ability to hear higher-frequency sounds. The ring tone is a spin-off of technology that was originally meant to repel teenagers — not help them. A Welsh security company developed the tone to help shopkeepers disperse young people loitering in front of their stores while leaving adults unaffected. The company called their product the "Mosquito."
Donna Lewis, a teacher in Manhattan, says her colleague played the ring for a classroom of first-graders — and all of them could hear it, while the adults couldn't hear anything.
Go to the full text article site to hear (or not hear...) a demonstration.
July 23, 2006
The Museum of Black Superheroes
From the Museum of Black Superheroes website:
"To begin with, the history of black superheroes is not easily assembled since early on, much of the work was not reported on. There aren't volumes of books out there on the subject, and even if you look at historical books put out by major publishers - the coverage on their own black superheroes is sparse at best.
Also, companies prefer to sweep any negative and stereotypical characters from their past under the rug in order to preserve their images today. Therefore, the search for early black superheroes turns up more negative images than anything else. The history as a whole needs to be looked at in order to fully appreciate the black superheroes being created today...
... In recent years, many African American artists and comics publishers have taken it upon themselves to create and explore more black superheroes. The impact of these independent comics can’t be overlooked so I’ve included them in the museum because they are vital to bringing black superheroes to the forefront of the public eye. With many more black artists drawing, and new black superheroes being created everyday, black heroes are on the rise. Over time, their success will only help to broaden the minds of those who take the time to read and enjoy them. In conclusion, if you know artists that are creating comics, buy their books and support black superheroes!"
July 22, 2006
Scout's Honor
A recent story in the New York Times ("Dare Violate a Copyright in Hong Kong? A Boy Scout May Be Watching Online") reports that boy scouts and girl guides in Hong Kong will be encouraged to work with the government to catch copyright offenders. Press releases from the Scout Association of Hong Kong and the government's Intellectual Property Department about the Programme on Respect for Intellectual Property Scout Fun Fair and Launching Ceremony seem to confirm that it is a real partnership between scouting and law enforcement to catch intellectual property "pirates."
I'm a former girl scout who enjoyed learning archery, survival skills, and self-defense, while my male peers mastered cooking and sewing, and I well remember the mania I had for collecting merit badges. According to the article, there are no plans to develop a similar program in the United States, but I designed some nifty badges just in case the American scouting leadership has a change of heart.
Thanks to Mel Horan of Garbage Island fame for his Photoshopping skills.
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik.
July 20, 2006
Lance In His Pants
I don't know why, but I just don't get this excited about snack crackers.
July 17, 2006
The Times They Aren't A-Changing
This month it seems that my longtime love-hate relationship with the New York Times is definitely tilting toward hate. Why? Because they've run yet another in-depth story on how teens use the Internet that hightlights criminal behavior. A few months ago they ran a six-part video series on Justin Berry and an accompanying article, "Through a Webcam, A Boy Joins Sordid Online World" about a middle-class teen who used his webcam to operate an online pornography business. Then this month they ran a three-part video series on Shiva Brent Sharma, another teen whose Internet experiences were turned to nefarious ends, who went from seemingly innocuous file-sharing to being a hardcore identity thief, as explained in "Identity Thief Finds Easy Money Hard to Resist." In other words, there's a simple message: give a bright, curious teen a computer and some digital knowhow, and he (or she) is likely to use it A) to crank out kiddie porn or B) to steal the identities of unwary oldsters.
I have kids who use computers with an Internet connection. Here are some of the activities that they've used them for this month at our house: creating a claymation movie that was entered in the school talent show, sharing their original audio and video remixes with friends via MySpace and YouTube (from Creative Commons material) , and making their own videogames for the neighbor kids to play (from Quest Creator shareware). As a parent, I'd love to think that they were really brilliant and remarkable, except I know that their friends are doing it too.
Why doesn't a major newspaper run a six-part or even a three-part exposé about that?
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik (along with my goopy off-season Valentine to the now more progressive LA Times).
www.ipanywhere.com
The top 10 unintentionally worst company URLs, here.
Human Space Invaders
July 16, 2006
It's Official: Babies Hate Bush
Both photo and post title from Arse Poetica.
July 15, 2006
Forgive and Forget
I have to give some credit to onetime Google hagiographer and Wired veteran John Battelle this week. Of course, I first have to admit to having held a grudge against him for three reasons:
1) his occasional cheerleading for Google Book Search
2) his tendency to value free market forces over those that preserve the public sphere
3) the fact that I shared a tiny prep-school class with him, in which John hung out with the jocks and made merciless fun of the kids who spent their afternoons with the old Radio Shak TSR-80s . . . okay, maybe in retrospect I understand that one
Anyway, this week he's saying that it's "cool" that his book The Search has become a pirated street bestseller in Mumbai:
Do I care about the piracy? No. No, no no. I care that someone in Mumbai cared enough to rip it off, and that someone there might be reading my stuff. That is just cool. Commercial markets always follow the free, or, well, the pirates in this case. Always.
I'm not sure I agree with the moral he draws from the story, but I think it's a healthy attitude about authorship, which well deserved its status as a wonderful thing on BoingBoing today.
Besides, he did point out the problem of Google's interest in competitive advantage long before it was of interest to others.
(And for more on teen social dynamics see Paul Graham's essay from Hackers and Painters on "Why Nerds are Unpopular." I think Graham is wrong to devote the first half of the essay to how kids are supposedly divided between the "smart" and the "popular," which as an educator I find to be a false distinction that is eugenically repulsive, but I like his point about how society values teens as consumers rather than as producers and thus makes the lives of "makers" miserable.)
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
Another Reason Not To Go To Law School If You Haven’t Already
Another Reason to Like Public Schools
July 14, 2006
Rembrandt Was A Nazi Icon?
According to this news story he was. Below is an excerpt:
His face is one of the best known in the art world, and as the Netherlands celebrates the 400th anniversary of Rembrandt's birth, his life and work retain few secrets. But did you know he was once a Nazi icon?
An exhibition at the Dutch Resistance Museum in Amsterdam recalls the Nazis' largely forgotten mission to incorporate the Dutch painter into fascist ideology, and win sympathy in the Netherlands, which they occupied in 1940.
The artist appeared on Dutch stamps issued during the occupation, a "Rembrandt" prize was awarded for artistic contribution to National Socialist culture, and a Rembrandt opera and film were written.
The Nazis even tried to institute a national holiday on Rembrandt's birthday, July 15, to replace the traditional Queen's Day parties on the date of the Dutch Queen's birthday.
July 13, 2006
"Just the guy in charge of regulating it"
Jon Stewart on Net Neutrality, courtesy of YouTube, of course -
Jemele Hill is possibly the only black female sports columnist writing today.
Read an interview with her here. Below is an excerpt:
Liz Cox Barrett: As a rule, columnists/opinion writers tend to be older white men. You are none of the above. According to a recent study prompted by the Associated Press Sports Editors, you were the only black female sports columnist to be found at the 305 newspapers surveyed. What do you make of that (or, in other words, why is that)? What do you bring to the task?
Jemele Hill: I think I'm going to get a license plate that says ".3" on it. Never in my life did I think I'd be the answer to a trivia question. I'm not sure what to think of it, really. On one hand, it gives me a pretty special distinction. I'm proud of what I am and what I've become. I don't mind being considered a "black columnist," because I bring those experiences to my column. On the other hand, it's sad. What does it say about our business that I'm the only one? I also won't deny there is some pressure on me because I am the only one. That can be difficult to manage at times. This is my first columnist job, so I'm going to make mistakes. But because of my age and what I represent, I'm not sure if I have much latitude.
Via Feministing.
Do You Copy That?
Yesterday Siva pointed out that the "scandal" about Ann Coulter's alleged plagiarism might have been vastly overblown. Of course, my UCI colleague Jon Wiener is probably right that right-wingers tend to be more likely to get a free pass on authorial infractions of the code of originality than left-wingers, but like Siva I'm still not gleefully legitimating the Coulter story.
My reservations chiefly have to do with seeing the name John Barrie associated with outing the conservative pundit from the story's first appearance in the New York Post. Barrie is a notorious media hound who loves to see his name in the press, so he can promote his commercially licensed plagiarism-detection software, Turnitin.com. I've used his product in our university writing program for the last eight years, but I have developed deep reservations about the company that produces it.
For advocates of digital rights and access to intellectual property, the parent company of Turnitin.com, iParadigms, has both a troubling past and a troubling future. Although founder John Barrie claims that U.C. Berkeley did not purchase a campus license for Turnitin.com because the university was embarrassed after he pointed out that “cheating was rampant” and thus “the university was dragged through the mud,” he doesn't mention the fact that the campus also has a legitimate gripe with Barrie, because the school might claim that the software was developed by campus personnel using campus resources while Barrie was on the institution's payroll. Thus Barrie might seem to have capitalized on an investment of public resources by attempting to sell his software back to his former employer. Particularly when open source and freeware alternatives could be developed (and are being developed at the University of California at Santa Barbara in the PAIRwise project without any media fanfare), the advancing hegemony of Turnitin.com in the market is disappointing. Furthermore, recent news from iParadigms about a collaborative project with LexisNexis to “protect intellectual property” with a product “designed to benefit the media and business community” does not give one much confidence in the lip service Barrie's company pays to academic ideals, particularly when the ethical obligations of a research university are to provide for the public good not corporate benefit. Although far from “total information awareness,” with programs like CopyGuard vying for attention and investment, the potential for surveillance by copyright holders risks hampering the dissemination of information within and between academic communities and, of course, among citizens participating in legitimate cultural practices that foster creativity and commerce.
Bottom line: this is a self-interested media stunt closely tied to a corporate monopoly, and political progressives should refuse to participate in it.
For more about the rhetoric surrounding the Turnitin.com program, including some choice words about the wishful thinking of technophobes, see my now-dated paper on "Honor Coding" from the Originality, Imitation, and Plagiarism Conference. (Siva was there too!)
Cross-posted at Virtualpolitik
July 12, 2006
"Bush Gardens"
A great multipage comic about body hair by Rachel Nabors. Here is an excerpted page:
Bush Sings "Bloody Sunday"
July 6, 2006
What In The World Is Up With This Sony Playstation Ad Campaign?
July 4, 2006
Happy Fourth!
Crate Tetris
From the Wooster Collective.
June 29, 2006
"A Brisk Walk"
Spot On
From "Pictures of Walls."
June 28, 2006
Don't Use The Link In This Post To Create Something "Substantially Similar" To A Jackson Pollock Painting
June 19, 2006
Any Reason For A Party, Eh?
June 18, 2006
Funny Error Message
June 17, 2006
Tee Shirt Philosophy
Recently seen tee shirts:
I AM NOT A TERRORIST! Please don't arrest me.
[NB: Probably not one to wear to the airport. The only time my well-traveled friend L. has been the recipient of "extra security measures" while trying to board a plane was when he was wearing a tee shirt purchased at the ML King Center in Atlanta that said: "Nonviolence or Nonexistence."]
I AM AN ACTRESS! May I take your order?
I GIVE MY WORD TO STOP AT THIRD! Teen Abstinence Day 2006
STOP CLUBBING BABY SEALS! They never buy a round, they dance too close, and their breath smells of herring.
June 16, 2006
Balloon Sculptures
Many more here! Most are safe not only for work but also for children's birthday parties, especially ones that embrace girl/princess gender stereotyping. Those rabbits may be up to no good, however! And then there is this:
June 14, 2006
The Darker Side of Adolescence in Fiction, Female Version?
Author Sam Miller posted his list of the "top 10 books about the darker side of adolescence" in the Guardian. His number one choice was "Lord of The Flies," by William Golding, which I would have to concur is a classic. His number two pick was "The Outsiders" by SE Hinton. SE Hinton is one of three authors on the list not to disclose a first name (the others being DBC Pierre and JD Salinger), from which you might (in this case) correctly deduce that SE Hinton is female, but she and/or her publishers understood that males, and maybe all potential readers, would be more inclined to read a book by a gender neutral author than by one named Susan Eloise Hinton. The Outsiders is the only book written by a woman on Miller's list, and it featured a male narrator.
I remember reading A Separate Peace, by John Knowles, which possibly was a list contender, as well as some of the books on Miller's list as a teen, and I enjoyed them, but the books that made the biggest impression on me were tomes like I Want To Keep My Baby by Joanna Lee, The Girls of Huntington House by Blossom Elfman, Bonnie Jo Go Home by Jeanette Eyerly, and It's Not What You Expect, by Norma Klein; all about relationships, with a special emphasis on the perils of teen sex. They weren't great literature, particularly, but they spoke to my life in a way books like A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess (another of Miller's top ten) couldn't. So I guess I tend, in one sense, to illustrate David Brooks' recent assertion that boys and girls are drawn to different books. On the other hand, works like Lord of the Flies and Catcher in the Rye were assigned by teachers, while the pulpy teen angst paperbacks I secreted within my math textbooks to read most assuredly were not, and neither were very many "classic" novels by women authors. Other than The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand, and To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee, I can't remember any.
Cross-posted at Feminist Law Professors.
June 12, 2006
Japan Notes I: J-Horror and the Bong
Last night I was watching the tape replay of Game 2 in the Mavs-Heat NBA finals at my favorite sports bar in Tokyo, along with my friends Rie and K-Gonn of the highly recommended Japanese NBA blog 24 Seconds, when the topic of J-Horror films came up. The recent spate of Japanese horror films has been anchored in large part around the conceit of vengeful ghosts, spirits, creepy child figures coming out of mundane, everyday technology: videotapes in Nakata Hideo's Ringu, cellphones in the Chakushin Ari, and so forth. Stephen King's Christine had something similar with a Plymouth Fury possessed by the devil or something, but since the target audience of horror films is basically teenagers, it's not clear where American comparative advantage lies. Films like Saw and Hostel are nasty, grisly affairs, but they don't have the same uumph as creepy ghosts popping out of TVs.
And it occurred to me, while we were chatting, that the only arena in which American teens are far ahead of their Japanese counterparts in consumer technology is the bong. In his performance No Cure for Cancer, Dennis Leary pointed out that American teens can make bongs out of apples, oranges, their own heads, whatever: "They say marijuana leads to other drugs. No it doesn't, it leads to fucking carpentry."
So how scary would a ghost trapped in a bong actually be? My concern is that it would be too sleepy to actually menace the teens much, sort of like if Freddy Krueger were played by Owen Wilson. The only way the spirit might actually get angry enough to decapitate the captain of the football team or whoever would be if the victim failed to pass the Cheez Doodles. Still, a possibility.
June 10, 2006
The Following Link Leads to a You Tube Video of a Metallish Rock Band Singing a Song With Approximately Five Words
June 7, 2006
Ben's Incredible Big List of Initialisms and Acronyms (BIBLIA)
Did you know that BIOYIOP meant "Blow It Out Your Input Output Port"? Or that FTASB meant "Faster Than A Speeding Bullet"? No? TYNTL ("Then You Need This Link") so that you can stop being a person with NFC.
May 27, 2006
Yup, Been There
From "This Is Broken"
"...I came across this sign while I was attending a software design methodology course at an IBM building in London.
"After wondering several times why each time I tried to go to the toilets I ended up in the restaurant, I looked carefully at the sign.
"As you can see, the sign system is of a modular design. One sign would work fine. Two clearly doesn't. With three or more, the system would probably start working again.
"After I took the photo, I watched people make their decisions for a while. I saw that at least 70% turned the wrong way, even after having gone the wrong way once before."
May 26, 2006
It's Never Too Soon To Start That Holiday Shopping!
May 25, 2006
Another Game I'll Pass On: Maiden Love Revolution
From Wired:
Interactive romance novel meets management sim in Maiden Love Revolution! The PS2 game, a best seller in Japan, starts with a snack-happy ex-beauty queen who wants to get back to her dating weight. Players assume the role of 220-pound Hitomi Sakurakawa as she struggles to slim down - mostly by restricting her diet. To advance, Hitomi must count calories and increase her exercise. The game keeps stats on her progress and ultimately rewards her conformity with a boyfriend.
Via Big Fat Blog.
May 23, 2006
"Copyright Law" Geographic Google Search Trends
The "Top Ten" cities in which people are conducting Google seaches about "Copyright Law":
1. Washington, DC USA
2. Cambridge, MA USA
3. Austin, TX USA
4. Reston, VA USA
5. New York, NY USA
6. Minneapolis, MN USA
7. Boston, MA USA
8. Pittsburgh, PA USA
9. San Francisco, CA USA
10. Salt Lake City, UT USA
I assume AOL has something to do with "Reston, VA" coming in at number four, and possibly the vibrant local music industry has propelled "Austin TX" to number three. For the number eight showing of "Pittsburgh PA," I have to think, "Michael Madison."
A New Theory Of How Life Developed On Earth
May 19, 2006
"(insert verb) this book!" (and while you are at it) steal this post!
Very cool, funny observations about the aftermath of Abbe Hoffman's choice of title, Steal This Book! at everyday life, where Mark Rittle notes: "The irony of course is that Abby's book is titled Steal This Book and is an anti-capitalist analysis of American consumer society. So what do we do? Make money on his verbage, of course."
Clucked up
From here.
"Company Wants to Trademark Pizza Scent"
According to this WaPo article [WARNING: The following article contains a misuse of term "copyright," as it is apparently used interchangeably with "trademark," and also some very bad puns]:
The aroma of a freshly baked pizza is arguably as universally recognizable as that of a newly mowed lawn or a fresh cup of coffee.
But a Lithuanian restaurant chain now wants the intellectual property rights for the scent in the small Baltic nation, saying it is closely associated with its pizza pies.
"Opinion polls show that many consumers in Lithuania identify the pleasure of eating pizza with our trademark," said Mindaugas Gumauskas, marketing director of the Cilija company. "This makes us believe that the scent of freshly baked pizza is a subject to our copyright."
Cilija, which owns dozens of pizza parlors in Lithuania and neighboring Latvia, has asked the national patent bureau to register the intellectual property rights of the scent. The agency did not comment on the trademark request.
If the request is granted, it does not mean that other pizzerias would have to stop making the oven-baked dish, but only Cilija would be able to make the claim that its food smells like freshly baked pizza.
Competitors say the idea stinks of unfair business practices and that Cilija is just looking to make more dough.
May 17, 2006
Durex Dickorations
May 15, 2006
Bill of Rights - Security Edition
The next time you travel by air, take the Bill of Rights - Security Edition along with you. When asked to empty your pockets, proudly toss the Bill of Rights in the plastic bin.
You need to get used to offering up the bill of rights for inspection and government workers enforcing the USAPATRIOT ACT need to get used to deciding if you'll be allowed to keep the Bill of Rights with you when you travel.
"Dick Cheney's Pepper Shot"
eBay Wins In the Supreme Court!
The Court unanimously overruled the Federal Circuit's holding that in patent cases, a district court must (absent exceptional circumstances) issue a permanent injunction after a finding of infringement. Full text of the opinion here.
May 14, 2006
Siskel and Ebert Get A Bit Snippy With Each Other While Making Promos
Yowtch, with a cussword at the very end. And again, this time with deployment of the eff word. And again, with repetitive cussing and religious bigotry to boot.
Sly & The Family Stone's "Everyday People"
May 11, 2006
Many Diverse Versions of "Stairway to Heaven"
Here's one by the Rock Lobsters. And here's one by the Nashville Super Pickers. And here's one by Vegimite Reggae. Uh oh, this one is by Those Darned Accordions. These and many more via WFMU's Beware of the Blog!
A Picture Is Worth 1000 Words...
From this NYT article. Toni Morrison's "Beloved" won some sort of "Best Work of Fiction" contest. Most of the runners up were by white guys.
Wooden Computers
See Ecogeek!
May 10, 2006
Hamsters Dancing, Then and Now
The original "Hampster Dance" here. Later, the interactive "Hampster Dance 2." Now, a completely terrifying remake here. Sound up!
Update: See also The Satanic Hampster Dance! And the legal threat it inspired!
"The Fire of Genius"
Brilliant and funny law prof Joe Miller, of Lewis & Clark, has a new blog, called The Fire of Genius. Needless to say, it is not about the Bush administration! The main focus so far seems to be Patent Law. Check it out!
May 9, 2006
A Kitchen for New Yawkahs!
"The Circular Kitchen:" "It can be easily added or relocated to any space, be it apartment, office, holiday home or factory and comes complete with all the facilities and storage space of a conventional kitchen. There are no conventional cupboard doors, so access to the kitchen’s various components is by rotating the central unit through 180 degrees, or the top unit which rotates through 360 degrees.
"What's more, it's completely lockable via the slatted sliding door and with such a small footprint (1.8 square metres), it is suitable for spaces that conventional kitchens are not. The circular kitchen consists of an outer circular wall with fixed rear wall and a sliding slatted, lockable doors.
"The inner core rotates 180 degrees and is equipped with all the conveniences of a conventional kitchen, including a stainless steel sink with chrome single lever mixer, a waste bin and drawers. The upper circular shelf rotates through 360 degrees to house crockery, glasses, etc. Inside it has its own lighting, electrical sockets, electronics, water and waste disposal."
And, y'all have to put on hose and heels to unload the circular dishwasher.
May 8, 2006
Everyday Magic
May 6, 2006
Translated Foreign News About the U.S.
At Watching America.
May 4, 2006
Heretical Labels for Bibles
More here.
May 2, 2006
Apple Sucks Redux
Late last August I posted this lengthy, whiney monologue about buying an Apple iBook. The little white laptop has traveled little since then, and received very gentle treatment generally. Yet the day before yesterday, the keyboard unexpectly popped out of the casing, breaking a plastic tab, and ejecting a spring that looks like it came from inside a retractable pen.
Since I'd spent almost $300 for an extended Applecare warranty, and since I'd had the iBook only eight months anyway, I was cautiously optimistic that this could be fixed. After an hour on the phone with Apple "Support," however, I learned that Apple would be happy to send me a new keyboard that I could install myself, accompanied by instructions on how to remove the old keyboard and not electrocute myself. But only if I give them a credit card number. No charge, said the Apple Rep. The keyboard is covered by the warranty, and Apple will even pay the shipping. But they won't do anything without a valid credit card number. And they won't tell me why.
It's quite common for hotels to require a credit card "for incidentals" before they will check you in to a room that someone else is paying for (like a law school that is generously hosting a conference, please get your mind out of the gutter, thank you). And here is what often happens: I get charged for phone calls I didn't make (I have a cell!) and bottled water I didn't drink (I'm too cheap to drink $6 bottles of water, but once in Chicago I got charged for six of them. Imagine how little sleep I would have gotten between trips to the bathroom if I had actually consumed all that over-priced Evian!). One memorable day I got charged hundreds of dollars for parking, even though I'd flown to the conference and didn't have a car with me. So I'm very suspicious about all this. I'm supposed to get an explanatory call from Apple later today. I'll blog what I learn, unless of course it makes me look stupid, as opposed to just petty, like this post suggests.
Update: Although yesterday's Apple Rep said I would not need to send in the old keyboard, today's caller said the credit card is to guarantee that I do indeed return the old keyboard. So I offered to mail in the old keyboard first, so they could have it in hand before sending the new one. No dice. The only way they will fix my computer without a credit card number is if I ship the whole thing to them, then they make repairs themsleves and ship it back. I'm sure this makes sense to someone...
Making Fire Using A Water Balloon
Instructions and more photos here. If you find yourself stranded and cold in the wilderness without balloons (but have a computer and Internet access, thank goodness), scroll down and you'll see that a water-filled condom will also work.
May 1, 2006
New York, New York
Civil War Letters of the Christie Family
"In 1861, two brothers, having just purchased a farm in Southern Minnesota, enlisted in the First Minnesota Battery of Light Artillery. Although neither expected a long tour of duty, William and Thomas Christie served in the First Minnesota Battery through June 1865. Their younger brother, Alexander, enlisted in an infantry regiment in fall 1864.
"All three brothers were excellent writers, and each wrote extensively while in the Army. Their letters, full of revealing observations on war, society, and contemporary politics, are contained within the James C. Christie and family papers at the Minnesota Historical Society."
Learn more here.
April 29, 2006
Surely This Is A Joke, And Yet....
D.C. prayer rally to seek lower gas prices
WASHINGTON, April 26 (UPI) -- A U.S. Christian group has grown tired of escalating gasoline prices and is set to stage a national prayer rally to lower the numbers at the pumps.
Various Christian clergy from around the country will convene around a Washington, D.C., gas station Thursday at noon to pray. For those who can't attend, a live Internet site and toll-free prayer line have been established.
In a release, the Pray Live group said many people are "overlooking the power of prayer when it comes to resolving this energy crisis."
Apart from sending a message to God, the rally had a message for humanity, said Wenda Royster, the group's founder.
"It is our hope that seeing and hearing some of the nation's most powerful preachers gathered around a gas station and the United States capital as a backdrop, will remind everyone who is really in charge of our world -- God," Royster said.
The Web site is at praylive.com. The toll-free phone number is 888-PRAYLIVE.
Via Hecate.
April 28, 2006
Crabs!
April 27, 2006
Amo a Laura
Abstinence only propoganda in Spanish. Oddly reminiscent of this.
April 24, 2006
"Average Homeboy"
The Bibliochaise
"...an armchairlibrary for who likes to be immersed in deep reading. It contains 5 linear metres of books and thanks to a special fitting structure is easily disassembled."
By the Italian company Nobody & Co.
April 21, 2006
PEN Awards Given to Courageous Writers
From this article:
...[E]very spring, PEN, an international group of writers, holds a literary gala that puts the everyday concerns of authors in perspective. It honors writers, publishers and others, in the USA and abroad, who have defied authorities or been jailed in cases of free expression....
Awards went to:
• Rakhim Esenov, a novelist, historian and Radio Free Europe correspondent, who has been under house arrest in Turkmenistan since 2004. He was permitted to travel to the awards only at the last minute.
• Sibel Edmonds, an FBI translator who was fired in 2002 after she discovered what she considered poorly translated documents about 9/11. Edmonds, who has been called an "inconvenient patriot" by Vanity Fair, started the National Security whistle-blowers Coalition and a website, justacitizen.org.
• Mohammed Benchicou, a crusading newspaper publisher jailed in Algeria on charges he illegally brought money into the country. PEN says he's the first person in Algeria jailed on such charges.
• Mohamed Hashem, an Egyptian novelist and publisher whose books have been confiscated by civil and religious authorities.
April 19, 2006
"Easter Turducken"
As a vegetarian, ordinarily just the word "turducken" nauseates me, no less the concept - a chicken is stuffed into a duck, which is stuffed into a turkey, and then cooked and eaten (sometimes with sausage dressing!), but not by me. "Easter Turducken," however, is another matter! Via Pen-Elayne.
Peace Art Cambodia
In 1998, the Royal Government of Cambodia began tackling the proliferation of illegal and surplus small arms through an integrated programme. By 2006, over 160,000 small arms had been publicly destroyed in Flame of Peace ceremonies.
In October 2003, Peace Art Cambodia began a metalwork skills training programme for apprentice artisans using thousands of these weapons as raw material.
More photos and information here.
April 18, 2006
Saturday, April 22nd
Big Pharma Soaks the Sleepy?
According to this article:
Many Americans are sleep-deprived zombies, and a quarter of us now use some form of sleeping pill or aid at night.
Wake up, says psychiatry professor Daniel Kripke of the University of California, San Diego. The pill-taking is real but the refrain that Americans are sleep deprived originates largely from people funded by the drug industry or with financial interests in sleep research clinics.
"They think that scaring people about sleep increases their income," Kripke told LiveScience.
Thanks to the marketing of less addictive drugs directly to consumers, sleeping pills have become a hot commodity, especially in the past five years. People worldwide spent $2 billion on the most popular sleeping pill, Ambien (zolpidem), in 2004, according to the BioMarket, a biotech research company.
Read the rest here.
April 17, 2006
Beverly Cleary is 90!
"Beverly Cleary, who turns 90 [April 12th], says that a school librarian encouraged her to become a children's author. "It seemed like a good idea, so I did.""
WaPo story here.
April 16, 2006
Jesus The Musical
April 13, 2006
A Visit from the Footbinder
April 12, 2006
The Phantom In Your Phone?
How does it occur to someone to blog about stuff like this, and how does the entry generate 53 comments?
April 11, 2006
I'm Not Sure Whether Or Not This Is Funny
Nor can I gauge whether or not it is work safe. The little angel on my shoulder that is supposed to filter my communicative output has fallen asleep. It was probably the allergy medicine. Take your chances here.
April 4, 2006
"Bush Was Right" The Video
As far as I can discern, this is not satire, it is a right wing rock band singing about what a great job Bush has done. Called "The Right Brothers," you can buy their music here, if you're like a masochist or something.
Update: I'm not the only one who thought that "Bush Was Right" sounded a lot like Billy Joel's song, "We Didn't Start The Fire." See Rox Populi.
April 3, 2006
I'd Try This
Details here.
April 1, 2006
I'm Leaving Sivacracy For Instapundit
Dang it all, I need to start blogging with another law professor! All this culture and communications crap is such as waste of my precious billable hours. While it is true that a number of tolerant, multiculturalist Northern Liberals will immediately begin calling me "cracker" and "hayseed" and "bitch" and "slut," the extra money I rake in from all the stupid books I'm going to write for Regnery will more than compensate for the namecalling. Spending ten seconds to type out a single sentence that constitutes an entire post (or sometimes just the word "indeed"!) will leave me ample time to completely change my political beliefs and then write reams about how instrumentally renouncing liberality gives me all sorts of credibility.
Reynolds and I are still negotiating whether it will be an equal partnership, or I will have to gracefully submit to his manly blog godliness. While it is true that my feminism would seem to make me a bad choice to join Instapundit, Reynolds has promised to more inclusively call his next book, "An Army of Davids and Some Blond Girl." So from now on, call me "Instaprofbabe." Well actually, you won't be able call me anything because I am fixing to turning off comments. Heh.
March 31, 2006
Arbitrary and Unsolicted Inexpensive Wine Recommendation
2004 "Smoking Loon" Syrah. Smooth, gently fruity, vague hint of plums and cherries. Costs about $10 if you shop at Piggly Wiggly (or even less online). Goes great with "veggie dogs," peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and/or leftover cheese pizza.
"Best American Science and Nature Writing 2006"
As listed by "Snarkmarket" whose expertise in ascertaining quality in science and nature writing is admittedly indeterminate, but you're probably already deep into friday afternoon procrastinationality if you are reading this, so why not check it out?
Gamecocks wallop Wolverines to repeat as NIT champions!
Story here! Update: Here's the NYT coverage!
March 28, 2006
"The Brick Testament"
Bible verses illustrated using Legos. Here is the Lego Last Supper:
"Museum Madness"
March 26, 2006
Taco Mural Made From Post-It Notes
By Mighty Girl
Fingers Breakdance
March 25, 2006
"Don't eat potatoes after using them for a battery"
March 21, 2006
The Sign Refers To The Building, Not the Product
From "This is Broken."
March 18, 2006
March 17, 2006
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
March 16, 2006
NYC Area Feminist Bloggers: Step Away From the Computer
And go to this panel discussion!
March 15, 2006
There Is An Entire Blog Devoted To Ramen Noodles
It is called The Official Ramen Homepage and you can subscribe so that you don't miss any entries.
March 14, 2006
Bamboogled
This is pretty funny if it is true. Actually it's even funny if it is satire.
March 13, 2006
Canstruction
Canstruction "combines the competitive spirit of a design/build competition with a unique way to help feed hungry people. Competing teams, lead by architects and engineers, showcase their talents by designing giant sculptures made entirely out of canned foods. At the close of the exhibitions all of the food used in the structures is donated to local food banks for distribution to pantries, shelters, soup kitchens, elderly and day care centers."
March 12, 2006
The Somewhat Navel-Linty In Praise of Bloggers Blog Post
My very favorite blogger currently blogging is Siva. Those who know him and read this blog, or just read this blog, know why. He is smart, thoughtful, tolerant of dissent, quick to admit error, thick-skinned, funny, articulate, and does not seem to have a petty or self-righteous bone in his body. He and Melissa are a terrific couple, wonderful together in a aren't-they-wonderful-together sort of way, and not at all in a way-too-cute-get-me-out-of-here aspect. And I can't wait to meet Jaya, and wouldn't object at all to more photos, hint hint, and look forward to her blogging career eagerly. In like 18 years.
There are many other bloggers I think very highly of. Yes I know I ended that sentence with a preposition, sue me, I need a hobby. I don't agree with the blogs I read all of the time. I don't even agree with myself all of the time. But this whole Koufax thing oppresses me a little. I'm glad Sivacracy was nominated, but we are a small blog and sort of weird, which is mostly my fault. And there are a lot of other blogs I think the world of that I couldn't vote for, because you can only vote for one blog in each category. There are perilously few Koufax nominees I wouldn't vote for; I read most of them already. And I comment at many of them, which I understand is unlikely to mean anything much to anyone but me, but since I almost always comment under my own actual name, is an endorsement of sorts that I don't give lightly.
So I guess what I want to say is, lefty bloggers, you're all winners! In Tee-ball all the kids get trophies; I wish the Koufaxs were like that.
The Portland Post!
Spent Friday at this conference, which was terrific. Open access legal scholarship is an important idea and I'm very pleased that so many smart, energetic people are thinking, speaking and writing about it. The Lewis & Clark Law Review will produce a symposium issue of the finished versions of the papers that were presented, which is something to watch for if the subject interests you.
The conference was organized by Lewis & Clark law profs Lydia Loren and Joe Miller, who are among the nicest, most-fun-to-hang-out-with law profs I know. Yesterday they took us to this exhibit, then to Powell's City of Books, plus gave us a nice walking tour of downtown Portland and bought us a lot of great food. If you ever get invited to a conference at Lewis & Clark Law School, do not even wait for the inviter to finish the sentence before you accept.
Portland is beautiful, and the people seemed very progressive and friendly. My only tiny note of discord is this: While "low flow" toilets are a good idea in theory, if you have to flush them eight times to get the job done, they probably aren't saving any water.
Also was lucky enough to have lunch with Barry Deutsch of Alas, A Blog while I was in town, and he is even smarter and funnier than I expected, which is going some. I'm currently enjoying the free wireless in the Portland airport and have a 12 hour or so journey home, but I should be back to blogging tomorrow.
March 8, 2006
"The Caffeine Curve"
Via Energy Fiend. See also: You Know You've Had Too Much Caffeine When...
March 7, 2006
Blogger Ethics
From today's NYT: Wal-Mart Enlists Bloggers in P.R. Campaign
"Brian Pickrell, a blogger, recently posted a note on his Web site attacking state legislation that would force Wal-Mart Stores to spend more on employee health insurance. "All across the country, newspaper editorial boards — no great friends of business — are ripping the bills," he wrote. It was the kind of pro-Wal-Mart comment the giant retailer might write itself. And, in fact, it did.
"Several sentences in Mr. Pickrell's Jan. 20 posting — and others from different days — are identical to those written by an employee at one of Wal-Mart's public relations firms and distributed by e-mail to bloggers.
"Under assault as never before, Wal-Mart is increasingly looking beyond the mainstream media and working directly with bloggers, feeding them exclusive nuggets of news, suggesting topics for postings and even inviting them to visit its corporate headquarters.
"But the strategy raises questions about what bloggers, who pride themselves on independence, should disclose to readers. Wal-Mart, the nation's largest private employer, has been forthright with bloggers about the origins of its communications, and the company and its public relations firm, Edelman, say they do not compensate the bloggers.
"But some bloggers have posted information from Wal-Mart, at times word for word, without revealing where it came from." ....
I'm trying to wrap my mind around the idea that bloggers post information that Wal-Mart sends them without any editing, any compensation and without disclosing it came from Wal-Mart. Why would anyone do that, unless they hoped for something in return? Or (putting on tinfoil chapeau), is this article an attempt to undermine confidence in blogging generally? Not that either Wal-Mart or the NYT could possibly have any motive for doing that...
March 6, 2006
Total Eclipse of the Heart On Kitchen Appliances
From the Department of Homeland Security
If Paintings Like This Give You The Creeps...
...you'll want to read this.
Fifty-Five
"A Meditation on the Speed Limit," set in Atlanta where the traffic is pretty awful.
My Spidey Sense Wins
In a stunning twist, the New York Times admits that they don't read Sivacracy:
In a stunning twist, the motion picture academy turned its back on "Brokeback Mountain" and its unflinching gay love story Sunday night, awarding the Oscar for best picture to "Crash," a moody kaleidoscope of racial confrontation in Los Angeles in which every character is at once sympathetic and repulsive.
John Cage - 4'33"
Coolest "Simpsons" Intro Ever
Here!
March 5, 2006
Last minute prediction
My only vaguely supernatural talent is my nearly Spidermanish ability to detect cinematic crap seconds before the opening credits roll. Because I've been Japan for the past few months, I haven't seen most of the Oscar-nominated films, and it's possible that I would actually hate Brokeback Mountain, Capote, and Good Night and Good Luck more than I hated Munich and especially Crash. But for me, Crash was one of those American Beauty/A Beautiful Mind experiences that left me shaken and forced me to race home to shower away the anger. I also had to avoid human contact for 3 days after each, to avoid screaming at friends who would tell me that they had loved the films and then intimate that there was something wrong with me for approaching each with embolism-inducing levels of rage.
Anyway, usually that's the film that wins Best Picture. So congratulations in advance to the creative team behind Crash!
Turns out Defamer agrees.
The dullest blog in the world.
No, not Sivacracy.net, it's this one.
This Isn't Satirical
March 3, 2006
Bruce Springsteen All Folked Up!
Wooo-hooo! Story here.
March 2, 2006
Breaking News About Butt Enhancements
Warning Signs for the Web
More here, where they were copied from. The final one at the originating site is a little dubious but I admit it made me laugh.
McPassion Meals
Now Fox News Has a New Theory
Good grief. Via Think Progress. Previous Fox News assessment here.
February 28, 2006
Mardi Gras Photo
February 27, 2006
microsoft ipod packaging parody
February 26, 2006
Blogga: For Librarians?
From the Laughing Librarian. Might need shushing!
Roulette Chocolate
"Seated in individual compartments, twelve chocolate bullets lay waiting to be bitten into. Although eleven of the sweet little slugs contain delicious praline centres, one conceals a seriously red hot chilli that's guaranteed to blow your head off - metaphorically, at least." Purchasable here.
"A Barn Town"
"A brawn not" and "Bra tan own" as well: Anagrams for Ann Bartow! Generate anagrams for your own name (or someone else's) here.
February 23, 2006
I Blame Blogging
From Yahoo News: "Americans work more, seem to accomplish less."
February 21, 2006
Online Gaming and Gender
Mythago has a great post entitled: "Why is my girl repellent chasing off all the hot chicks?" Here is an excerpt:
The eternal "debate" about T&A in gaming goes like this:
Female Gamer: This really pisses me off.
Male Gamer: The human body is beautiful. You don't have to look at it. If most gamers were female we'd have more naked men and male booth bimbos, although I'm really pretty freaked out at any hint of homosexuality--plus, I could never compete with those hot male models--so I'd be very uncomfortable if that happened, which luckily it never will. Say, I wonder why there aren't more female gamers?
February 20, 2006
AND THEN JESUS SAID "MY BAD"
See Corrente.
"Saved Premillenialist Christians Shouldn't Drive"
From Jason Torchinsky at Stay Free! Daily
"I'm sure everyone here has been driving and seen the bumper sticker that reads "In case of Rapture, car will be unmanned." While this never fails to inspire some very action-movie style daydreams and exciting video game premises, it also brings up a far more practical issue: should saved Christians be allowed to drive?
"One would think that, if we don't grant driver's licences to narcoleptics, epileptics, or other people who may, at random, lose all control of their careening vehicle, we sure as hell won't grant a license to someone who may just up and disappear without warning. But, this never seems to come up.
"That fundamentalist, evangelical, end-times-anticipating Christians seek to create or alter legislation to support their beliefs is not exactly news. And, of course, it's well within their rights to petition and badger and seek to achieve their goals of teaching religious pseudoscience in schools, or keeping gay people from marrying, and so on-- but it seems to me that if they are really going to be forthright in their goals of altering the laws of the United States to fit their theology, they can't just pick and choose the laws they want. To really be taken seriously, they need to go all the way, to do the right thing and press for legislation stipulating that anyone who has accepted Jesus Christ into their hearts cannot safely pilot a motorized vehicle or similar heavy machinery." ...
February 19, 2006
Cheney Shoots Another Innocent Longhorn
Download file or click link.
Cheney's Got A Gun.
February 18, 2006
February 17, 2006
Cook an egg with two cell phones
Instructions here. If this actually works I'm going to worry a lot more about the effect that my cell phone is having on my brain.
Update: It's a joke. When I said, "If this actually works I'm going to worry a lot more about the effect that my cell phone is having on my brain," I meant my brain that thinks this won't actually work. Because it's a joke. Apologies for any cell phone minutes you wasted trying to fix yourself a snack. If you live in a warm climate, I've heard that sidewalks can sometimes can be used to cook eggs. Cell phones can of course be used to order in.
Who Is The Bigger Jerk?
When I read this article I thought it was Korman by far, but that seems to be the minority view. I think he acted like a whiny bully, especially by forwarding the e-mail exchange, and Abdala is way better off not having taken the job with him.
February 16, 2006
Vault Radio!
As a careful saver in many senses of the word (child of Depression era parents whose parents suffered greatly during the Depression, for reasons-not-of-their-own-doing), I have articles of clothing older than some of my students. As I type this, I wear a tie-dyed "Collegetown Bagels" tee shirt old enough to drink. So I love things that are free! And old and good! Check out Vault Radio here.
February 14, 2006
February 8, 2006
August J. Pollak Has A Confession
Original here:
"Okay, in light of the whole Mohammed cartoon outrage issue, I want to confess something about my personal experiences with racism, racial stereotyping, and self-censorship in cartooning.
"A few months back when Tom DeLay was indicted and everyone kept making that "you could indict a ham sandwich" line, I did a strip called "Ham Sandwich: a true crime story." The gag was all the criminal exploits of a ham sandwich. In one panel I talked about how the sandwich converted to Judaism in prison to avoid being killed because it wouldn't be Kosher.
"Thinking back, I remembered that my original idea was to have the sandwich convert to Islam, and not be executed because it wouldn't have been Halal. I changed it because I was worried the stereotype of converting to Islam in prison was a slur against black prison convicts, or that I was suggesting people who converted to Islam were criminals. Looking back on it, I realize that probably makes no sense whatsoever.
"So, yeah. There you have it: my personal experience with racial self-censorship in cartooning. I changed the religion of a sandwich.
"Reading some editorial cartoon sites this morning, and observing the onslaught of self-righteous cartoonists who are all now sketching stereotypical Muslims in turbans carrying scimitars and lopping off heads, I realize I'm far from the line these guys have crossed, but for the sake of openness, there you go.
"On the other hand, people meet me at shows and tell me their favorite character in the strip is the ghost of Adolf Hitler. So I really have no idea what passes for sensitivity in this business anymore."
Jesuspets
"Many Christians believe that animals do not go to heaven. So when Jesus comes back and you return with him to heaven, will there be somebody to take care of your dog or cat?
"If you have a non-Christian family member, they might take care of your pet, but if not, have you made any plans? Imagine being taken to streets of gold while your dog starves to death walking around in his own feces trapped in your small house or apartment, subject to fire and earthquakes or even being eaten by heathens searching for any remaining morsel of food. Do you want that to happen?
"With the imminent collapse of the global economy and rampant godlessness, even the community shelters will not have the resources to care for your poor, hungry animals. So you need to make preparations.
"That’s what JesusPets is for. We are assembling a community of heathen pet-lovers to care for pets that are “left-behind.” We are coordinating with feed mills and kennels in preparation for your post-apocalyptic pet care needs.
"Make hard CA$H from home while the world is in flames!
"Are you an animal lover; and also an atheist, agnostic, jew, muslim, or other non-Christian? If so, you might qualify for the JesusPets Partner Program!
"JesusPets will pay YOU to take care of dogs, cats, and other pets. To qualify, you must agree with this statement:
"The JesusPets Partner Program Statement
* I love animals, and am willing to care for pets after the Christian Rapture.
* I am not, and never have been a born-again Christian.
* I believe it is immoral to have sex with animals, and have no desire to do so.
* I believe it is immoral to consume common domesticated pets (note: this includes goldfish!), and have no desire to do so."
More here.
February 5, 2006
It Was Dynamite!
I got up very early this morning and drove to downtown Columbia to watch the implosion of Carolina Plaza, an older building on the University of South Carolina campus; you can watch news coverage of this event here (click on the link that says "plaza falls" near the little red camera symbol) or here. Hearing the blasts, feeling the earth shake, and watching the 15 story building rather gracefully fall down was much more fun than I'd expected.
The building began life as a hotel, and after the University took it over, one reported advantage of working there was that every office had its own restroom (with shower, but alas, not always reliably provisioned with toilet paper). It was built the same year as the University of South Carolina School of Law, where bathrooms are in much shorter supply. I hope to be blogging about the demolition of the current law school building someday soon, but not until we've moved into a shiny new one first, so if you have millions of dollars you are not using, please donate them to our building fund, and we'll give you a front row seat when we blow up the old one!
February 1, 2006
The Origin of Feces
This is a link to an article about poop, and there are illustrations. I was thinking it would be smart to turn off the "comments" function on this one, but hey, if you want to talk about crap in the comments, have at it...
Ads I saw today at "feminist blogs"
Ads for Kate O'Beirne's Disgusting Book!
Exploitive ads for "Antiterrorism Career Opportunities!" See also this!
Because propping up the patriarchy pays better than subverting it?
Sheesh. I'm sorry if I sound shrill, but dang...
Yahoo-style Logo Maker
Try it yourself here.
January 31, 2006
The Indian Shankar Drum Ganesh Machine
Here. Sound up!
January 24, 2006
Dance, Monkeys, Dance
The Repurposing of "Mallard Fillmore" Comic Strips...
Into "Gipper, The Talking Points Duck," via The Talent Show.
Mindless Fun
January 23, 2006
Fireworks Factory Explosion
Here. It's most compelling with the sound up.
January 21, 2006
What Are You Afraid Of?
Alphabetical list of phobias here.
January 17, 2006
Edible Architecture
Fun With Fonts
From "Spell With Flickr" via Crooked Timber.
Fun With Google
Taken from here, where there are many more examples.
January 16, 2006
Hoogo Hooga Ooga Chakka
That's Not The Best Blonde Joke Ever, This Is:
Q: What do you call a blonde who flies a plane?
A: A pilot, you fucking misogynist.
Via Feministe.
A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa."
Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00."
This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. "Okay, " says the lawyer, "your turn".
She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"
The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00.
The blonde says, "Thank you, " and turns back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.
Penguin Power
Flightless waterfowl communication here.
Via Pen-Elayne.
January 15, 2006
Great Vegetarian Product!
With half of their 120 calories coming from fat, they aren't exactly health food, but dang, Morningstar Farms' soy, veggie "Philly Cheese Steak Burgers" are quite delicious, and any carnivores you are feeding will enjoy them too. "In your grocer's freezer," probably. They are available amongst my local Piggly Wiggly's frozen food offerings, though somewhat inexplicably in the "Breakfast Foods" section.
Sea Lion, Feline, Whatever...
Interesting sociolinguistic anecdote involving a smelly dead animal at Language Log is unlikely to help you find a boyfriend.
January 14, 2006
Rock Balancing
Gallery here.
Harry Hutton Has Some Blogging Advice For Glenn Reynolds
Here.
We here at Sivacracy, or at least me here at Sivacracy, will attempt to improve our post by appending a random, colorful map of South Carolina.
Rate Your Students
"The Rate Your Students blog offers college professors a chance to rate their students. We love most of our students, but get annoyed at the entitled members of the iPod generation and their casual relationship to a college education."
Written by "The Professor" who says: "I'm a 40ish professor at a small college in the South. I once gave a shit what people thought of me, and when I finally escaped that trap, things started to happen." But note that he remains anonymous. See also this article.
January 13, 2006
Blessed Are The Geek
From here.
The Top 16 Changes Now That the Baby Has Arrived
In honor of Melissa and Siva, but not necessarily representative of their experiences...
16> Hubby drops to #2 on the list of people drooling at the sight
of your breasts.
15> Store clerks don't look at you so funny when you buy your
regular weekly supply of diapers.
14> Finally, someone you can beat at "Got Your Nose," at least
for a year or so.
13> You develop a liking for minivans and sensible shoes,
and a deep-seated contempt for Michael Jackson.
12> You're not so tolerant of strangers asking to touch your
round little belly anymore now that you're just FAT.
11> Goodbye, happy hour. Hello, Happy Meal!
10> Can't leave the AK-47s under the couch anymore.
9> No longer get arrested for whipping out your breast on the
subway.
8> The realization that caca comes in a rainbow of lovely colors.
7> Well, there goes the pet dingo.
6> Cases of Bud Light quickly replaced by cases of Butt Wipes.
5> Bundle of joy, my ass. Just another ingrate to buy cigarettes
for.
4> Junior looks adorable in his little "sandbox," but the cat is
seriously torqued about it.
3> Mama cuts back to a sixer a day now that she's only "drinkin'
fer one."
2> For efficiency, your paycheck now direct-deposited to Disney.
and TopFive's Number 1 Change Now That the Baby Has Arrived...
1> The closest you come to orgasm is when you think of sleep.
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2000, 2005 by Chris White ]
Blogging and Pseudonymity
Today I learned that The Chronicles of Dr. Crazy have ended, but the author has started a new blog, also pseudonymous, here. She explains here that while her "Dr. Crazy" pseudonymity allowed her to a sense of freedom to talk about her personal life, it also meant that she couldn't write "in a real or authentic way about [her] research or about the material [she] teach[es]...." Instead, she felt she had to "fabricate and embroider in ways that are obfuscating," so that her real identity would not be revealed. She considered revealing her true "meet space" identify on the blog. However, last semester she picked up a malicious troll who almost caused her to stop blogging altogether, and that reminder about "the number of weirdos in the world," in conjunction with her untenured status make her unwilling to blog under her real name. Her solution has been to start fresh with a new pseudonymous blog at which she will "feel free to talk about exactly what [she's] working on and what [she's] teaching and how [she's] doing those things."
I'm glad she's going to continue to blog, and I'm really happy that she will discuss her academic life in more detail, because her observations about teaching, scholarship, and the culture of academe as she experiences it are very interesting. Though I completely understand her reasons for remaining pseudonymous, I'm sorry she won't be joining the "real namers" of the feminist blog world - terrific, erudite, feisty folks like Lauren and Jill at Feministe, Amanda Marcotte and Pam Spaulding at Pandagon, Roxanne Cooper at Rox Populi, Jessica Valenti, Vanessa Valenti, Samhita Mukhopadhyay, and Ann Friedman of Feministing, Lindsay Beyerstein at Majikthise, Morgaine Swann at The-Goddess, and Elayne Riggs at Pen-Elayne. These women, and many others like them, are really reaching people with their blogs, and making wonderful positive contributions to the feminist movement.
I enjoy blogs like Bitch, Ph.D., Echidne of the Snakes, Pinko Feminist Hellcat, One Good Thing, Angry Black Bitch, and The Happy Feminist, but I dread the inevitable day it is discovered that a seemingly feminist pseudonymous blogger is actually an anti-feminist man, who has been lying profusely and manipulatively about his background, a la James Frey or Asa "Forrest" Carter, or JT Leroy. I don't think this is a very likely outcome with respect to Dr. Bitch, Echidne, Sheezlebub, Flea, Shark-Fu, or Happy, but their pseudonymity also precludes them from evolving into the visible, "public intellectual" feminist leaders that they certainly seem to otherwise have the drive and talent to become. Sometimes I wonder how much energy and sleep they lose worrying about having their true identities revealed, or how much trying to avoid identifiable disclosures causes them to self-censor, or even lie about their lives.
I know something about the perils of blogging under my own name. The abuse I received from some "readers" is part of the reason this blog doesn't have a "comments" function operational right now. Siva is considering bringing back comments, and I'm thinking about how I will handle the trolls, as I continue to field the occasional harassing phone calls and e-mails that didn't stop when the comments did. The feminist "real name" bloggers give me courage, and they give me hope, and I applaud and thank them for that with all my heart.
"Dragon Slayers or Tax Evaders?"
Legal Affairs hosts an article by Julian Dibbell about the intersection of tax laws and virtual worlds. Here is an excerpt:
...."In the course of this project, I made a total of $11,000 selling on eBay the items I won playing a game called Ultima Online, $3,900 of which was in the final, most profitable month. I reported my profit to the IRS, and I paid the requisite taxes. But after I did so, a troublesome set of questions continued to nag at me—for which even IRS publication 525, entitled "Taxable and Nontaxable Income," couldn't provide answers.
This was remarkable, for publication 525 would appear to contain every conceivable form of income known to accounting. To read it once is to realize that you know nothing about income. Here you'll find a description of gains, ill-gotten and otherwise, so irregular that they can be taxed only according to that form of guesswork known as fair market value. Here are stocks, options, retirement watches, and stolen goods ("If you steal property, you must report its fair market value in your income in the year you steal it unless in the same year, you return it to its rightful owner").
Most significant for my purposes, here too are items acquired either through barter or as prizes in a game. The rules make clear the IRS's fundamental point: Goods taken in trade or won at play are taxable the moment they fall into somebody's hands, even if they are not sold for money. The more I read, the more I wondered whether reporting the amount I had brought home from selling virtual items on eBay was enough to satisfy the IRS." ....
January 11, 2006
Pick Up Your Toys
Here is a funny Ikea advertisement that runs in Europe, but not in the United States, because we are prudes. Via Sugarbank.
The Economics of Stupidity?
From The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity:
"The First Basic Law of Human Stupidity asserts without ambiguity that
always and inevitably everyone underestimates the number of stupid individuals in circulation.
"At first, the statement sounds trivial, vague and horribly ungenerous. Closer scrutiny will however reveal its realistic veracity. No matter how high are one's estimates of human stupidity, one is repeatedly and recurrently startled by the fact that:
1. people whom one had once judged rational and intelligent turn out to be unashamedly stupid.
2. day after day, with unceasing monotony, one is harassed in one's activities by stupid individuals who appear suddenly and unexpectedly in the most inconvenient places and at the most improbable moments.
"The First Basic Law prevents me from attributing a specific numerical value to the fraction of stupid people within the total population: any numerical estimate would turn out to be an underestimate. Thus in the following pages I will denote the fraction of stupid people within a population by the symbol s." ...
Read the whole (stupid?) thing here.
January 10, 2006
Spot the Irony
There aren't many law review articles that draw readership and attention from legal scholars across subject areas, or that retain importance for years on end, but a few do, and one of them is the late Robert Cover's essay, "Nomos and Narrative."
After reading it several times I still find it profound, moving, confusing, and challenging, and I'm not alone in this. An excerpt from an abstract about this essay reads as follows: "Nomos and Narrative encourages those who read it to see a system of law as nothing less than a "world". And each such world is identified by Cover as the product of a narrative that, at once, shapes, expresses, and may ultimately threaten the identity of those who live within it."
The Berkeley Electronic Press recently published a new symposium comprised of essays by important legal thinkers about "Nomos and Narrative." They all look interesting and provocative, and also, guess what, they are all written by men.
January 9, 2006
Create Your Own Radio Station
Via the Music Genome Project. I can personally recommend "Ani DiFranco Radio."
The Top 25 Businesses Jesus Would Patronize
25> Heaven-Eleven
24> Barns and Stable
23> Frederick's of Nazareth
22> Old Noah
21> Burlington Coat-of-Many-Colors Factory
20> Me & Taylor
19> Saved-a-Lot
18> Abercrombie & Fish & Loaves
17> Blessed Buy
16> Lordstrom's
15> Vatican's Secrets
14> Jmart
13> Create and Bare All
12> Rome Depot
11> Hosanna Republic
10> JC Penance
9> Sinnerbon
8> Bed, Bethlehem and Babylon
7> Goys "R" Us
6> Resurrection Hardware
5> Sam Goody Goody Two Shoes
4> Wal-Martyr
3> Mom's-a-Virgin Megastore
2> Stables
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Business Jesus Would Patronize...
1> TMIFridays
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2006 by Chris White ]
January 8, 2006
Gaming Sexism
Utopian Hell asks men to consider what the online games might look like if women ruled the world, writing:
... "You’ve heard about this great new fantasy game, and you’re really itching to play it. The day it comes out, you’re in line with all of the other people eager to buy the game. You come home and pop it into your console or PC, then turn it on.
"At character select, you have a choice between four different female characters and one male character. The female characters are attractive, but they’re dressed as if they’re ready to do battle – no skimpy clothing here. They all have detailed stories as to why they’re out on their quest.
"The first one seeks ancient tomes to return to her library back home in the hopes that she can crack an ancient spell that she’s been working on for some time. The second one saw her brother killed by the hands of the enemy, and now she seeks revenge of the most bloodthirsty sort. The third one is a mercenary, and she just wants to see blood spilled in exchange for enough drinking money, and the fourth one is seeking riches to build a castle and conquer the southlands.
"After reading all of those, you get to the only male option in the game. His stats are the same as all the other characters, but his story is much different, and his clothing is much different. It turns out that his parents turned him out of the family farm because he didn’t want to get married at the age of majority like every other male. Thus, he’s been forced to take his finely-honed martial arts skill out adventuring so that he can find a date. His main weapon is a quarterstaff, and his avatar is dressed in a mesh shirt, leather speedos, and he sports a constant hardon.
"You’re not too thrilled with the female avatars, and want to play something you can relate to a bit more. Unfortunately, the male avatar only fits the bill in so far as gender. He’ll just have to do. Maybe you’ll be able to find some armor along the way to cover up his protruding nipples and bulging sack. At least he’s muscular, that’s a plus.
"So off you go. During the adventure, you meet plenty of eligible women. Unfortunately, you can’t control a lot of the dialog, and you find yourself shamelessly flirting with every one you come across, wiggling your ‘package’ at them whenever they come near. You find a few encounters during gameplay that actually engage in light-hearted sex acts, but unfortunately you find that your only options are to have sex with other males.
"The armor situation doesn’t get any better, either. Every set of armor is skimpy at best, and something out of a BDSM homoerotic wet dream at worst. Once, you find a pair of greeves that actually covers up the gigantic, swaying package between your legs, making you feel a bit better. However, when you turn around, you find that your ass cheeks are bare and getting chapped by the wind.
"When you come across other players in the online version, who have chosen the female avatars, you find that they’re wearing the exact same armor as you, but it covers them up and makes them look actually protected while still letting them be attractive. What’s worse, due to the nature of your avatar’s clothing, you get more than one solicitation by other males (or are they women playing male characters? you can never tell)." ...
Read the full post here.
UFO Pictures!
From "The Best UFO Pictures Ever Taken," page one.
January 1, 2006
Boycott and Girlcott Coldplay!
From Boing Boing:
"Coldplay's new CD comes with an insert that discloses all the rules enforced by the DRM they included on the disc. Of course, these rules are only visible after you've paid for the CD and brought it home, and as the disc's rules say, "Except for manufacturing problems, we do not accept product exchange, return or refund," so if you don't like the rules, that's tough.
"What are the other rules? Here are some gems: "This CD can't be burnt onto a CD or hard disc, nor can it be converted to an MP3" and "This CD may not play in DVD players, car stereos, portable players, game players, all PCs and Macintosh PCs." Best of all, the insert explains that this is all "in order for you to enjoy a high quality music experience." ...
Fans need to stop buying Coldplay CDs altogether, or this practice will spread.
It's Out of Stock!
And Since We Have No Place To Go...
Bad News Hughes Had The Best Christmas Ever
His blog motto is "Striving to find a way to punch people in the face by using the Internet," and there are photos! It's a great example of the sort of offbeat, extremely amusing content that blogs make possible. I can't imagine this sort of photojournalistic account of a family party being published and accessible in any other communication medium, though possibly I simply subscibe to the wrong magazines and need to watch more television.
December 31, 2005
Hope 2006 Gets Off To A Great Start!
One Day at the Comics Page of My Local Newspaper
All three of these strips appeared in The State, my local newspaper, on December 29, 2005:
Graphic sexism is apparently quite hilarious.
December 25, 2005
Warmest Wishes for the Day
December 24, 2005
Peace Be With You
Merry Christmas!
December 23, 2005
The Top 15 Homeland Security Christmas Cards
15> We wish you a Merry Christmas!
We wish you a Merry Christmas!
We wish you a Merry Christmas!
And we've read your e-mail!
14> Christmas sympathy to you again!
Your ire we wish to soften.
We swear the X-ray machine revealed
A nail file in that coffin!
13> All the season's best to your and your--
Hey wait! Is that a beard?? GET ON THE GROUND AND PUT
YOUR HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD!! NOW!!!
12> Civil rights roasting on an open fire,
Blackjack breaking off your nose.
Forced confessions being blurted out in pain
-- It's Christmas Day in Guantanamo.
11> Tickle Me Jell-O! Lettuce Patch Kids!
We got gifts to match your desires.
But next time, speak more clearly
Into our planted bugs and wires.
10> **PLACE PALM ON READER TO DECODE THIS HOLIDAY MESSAGE**
9> The agents outside are frightful,
They've been stalking you since nightfall.
Since you haven't a friend to call,
Tell it all, tell it all, tell it all!
8> Watch out! Be safe! The terrorists
Have evil plans and instructions,
for turning roasting chestnuts
into weapons of mass destruction!
7> The Gingerbread's yummy, the eggnog delicious.
Let us know if your neighbor does something suspicious.
6> Your rights got run over by John Ashcroft,
And he even got the courts to back him up.
So instead of whining 'bout the Constitution,
Why don't you wave a flag and just shut up?
5> Two lists we seek this Christmas Day,
one Naughty and one Nice.
So hand them over now, Fat Boy
-- we won't ask you twice.
4> May your holiday season be filled with all the joys and
pleasures you find dear. Which, according to your
web-surfing history, includes Honduran cigars, Coca Cola
collectibles, naked Asian girls and vibrating butt-plugs.
3> In the meadow, we will build a snowman.
We'll pretend his skin and beard are brown.
We'll say, "You al Qaeda?" He'll say, "No, man!"
But just in case, we'll haul his ass downtown.
2> We see you when you're sleeping.
We know when you're awake.
We like you in that nightie but
we know those boobs are fake!
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Homeland Security Christmas Card...
1> A child was born on Christmas Day.
Despite the "savior" hype,
we've searched the manger twice
'cause he's a Middle-Eastern type.
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2002 by Chris White ]
December 22, 2005
Last Minute Gift Idea: Astronaut Jesus
December 21, 2005
PlanetChristmas Photos Of Houses Decorated For The Holidays
Wow! Too many folks on my street try to be "tasteful" with a green boughs, red ribbons and a few white lights. So boring and conformist! How can I convince the neighbors that multicolored lights are not necessarily a dread sign of liberalism?
Ikea
I realize I'm hopelessly immature, but admit it, you laughed too. Via Jen and Tonic, and yes, you can buy one in the U.S..
Interesting Things To Read Elsewhere
World Without a PATRIOT Act
Supercopied in its entirety from Fafnir at Fafblog! because Jeebus-in-the-Library-of-Congress'-card-catalog, how would one even begin to excerpt it?
"So I'm browsin through my local library checkin out the latest developments in shelving technology when Osama bin Laden jumps outta the card catalogue an hijacks the reference section!
"Oh no!" says me. "Stop him before he misfiles that almanac!"
"Mwa-hahaha, you're too late!" says the terrorist mastermind escapin into the periodicals. "Now nothing can stop me from researching the history of your hometown's spicy marmalade festival!"
"He's in the microfiche," says the crusty ol librarian. "We'll never catch im now!"
"Oh John Ashcroft, where are you when we need you most"!
"Blue Balls for the Red States"
That's the name of this Harper's feature. If you can read through until the end without being overcome by nausea or paralyzing fear that we are all on the express strike-proof train to hell in a very hot and unpleasant bucket (feel free to stop and take a shower, or nibble crackers and sip ginger ale mid-paragraph if you need to) you'll get to the predictable sex=death assertion, only here it is via suicide rather than A.I.D.S. because the message that sex will make you want to die has perhaps been deemed to possess more virginity-preserving resonance with the young people than the construct that sex will kill you slowly.
Unique Handknitted Holiday Gift Ideas
Happy Winter Solistice!
The Sidewalk Is Not An Ashtray
I'm not a smoker and I've always loathed the smell of burning tobacco, but I recognize that people have the right to smoke if they want to, and I've sometimes felt pity for the folks uncomfortably clutching cigarettes in bad weather, smoking quickly to escape the bleak alleys, unappealing porticos or filthy loading docks to which they are often relegated. My sympathy turns to anger, however, when I have to navigate pavement or stairs covered in wet, slippery cigarette butts. I don't enjoy trodding through dry cigarette butts, either, frankly, but wet ones will stick to the shoes or make a slick surface even more dangerous. Why do so many smokers think that throwing cigarette butts to the ground and stamping them is a permissible way to dispose of this refuse? Smokers: No one wants to see your nasty butts!
O Holy Night Remix
December 20, 2005
Big Balls
Via Pen-Elayne.
Via this festive site.
It's A Wonderful Internet
Cats and a Christmas Tree
Make Your Own Snowperson
Here. I gave mine two heads and secondary sex characteristics.
December 19, 2005
Amazon Gift Guides
If you are busy, unimaginative, paralyzed with indecision, or utterly lacking in discernment, but somehow earn enough of a living that you have disposable income sitting around waiting for you to dispose of it, Amazon.com has "gift guides" just for you. The company.com's "gift recipient" categories.com include the predictable "Mom," (the Oprah Magazine?) "Dad," (a ladder?) and "Business Associate," (a $50 key ring?) but also a few that are rather surprising. For example, how many of you slap your forehead and think, "I need presents for "country boys and cowgirls," I'll bet Amazon.com has some suggestions for me!" Thank goodness! Otherwise you'd never have thought of a three piece cutlery set! Or "Undoubtedly Amazon.com knows just what a metrosexual would like in his stocking." Whew, who knew that metrosexuals wore shirts?
Once you actually wade into the category listings, there is a lot of overlap, and it seems like Amazon.com may be trying to dump stuff that just wasn't moving, because what would possess you (unless it had been specifically requested) to buy an iron for a grandparent? It's not like steam irons can take the wrinkles out of skin. And why, unless you were an exhibitionist, would you give a telescope to the neighbor family? Cripes, if you are determined to give Amazon.com your money, invest in gift certificates, that's my holiday giving advice!
Interactive Carolling Chins
December 17, 2005
Librarian Trading Cards
Here. Watch them as a slide show. Collect the whole set! Too bad they don't come with stickers and bubblegum.
December 16, 2005
Feminist Classic Censored By Copyright Laws
Ampersand at Alas, A Blog has a great post up (which references this NYT piece) entitled "Feminist Classic Censored By Copyright Laws." The astute observer will note that I have copied his title! Short words and phrases, such as titles, are generally not considered copyrightable. Now I'm about to engage in fair use to excerpt the post:
"Chances are, if you're an American feminist, you've never read Simone de Beauvoir's The Second Sex. Even if you're a highly educated feminist who takes pride in having read at least a sample of all the important first- and second-wave feminists, you probably haven't read her. Neither have I, even though I thought I had (it was assigned reading back when I was a Women's Studies student).
"You see, the real Simone de Beauvoir isn't available in English - only in the original French. The English version I and many other English-reading feminists have read, is translated so badly that at times it says the exact opposite of what de Beauvoir intended. ....
"In addition, about 150 pages of The Second Sex is cut out of the English language edition.
"There are qualified translators who'd love to take on the project; there are publishers, such as Harvard University Press, eager to publish a better-translated, complete Second Sex.
"But the publishing house Knopf has the exclusive English-language rights locked up until The Second Sex goes into the public domain - in 2056. Knopf refuses to do an updated transation themselves, and they refuse to allow anyone else to publish one, either." ....
Aspazia at Mad Melancholic Feminsta endorses Amp's sentiments and adds:
...."While Ampersand demonstrates how much this violates principles of the free market, I want to add that it is a clear sign of the continued and pervasive sexism in our society. This is an important and landmark piece of intellectual writing, that should appeal to more than just feminists. From the get go, the translation process was botched. What Ampersand doesn't include is that the French version is full of a dozen errors as well (see this article). No publisher has handled this book with the care and rigor that we would extend to a famous male thinker.
"When I teach this work to students, I always situate it in the context in which it was written, the philosophical influences (particularly phenomenology), and make reference to the French. It is a lot of labor for an undergraduate class, but the translation fails to seriously capture de Beauvoir's real argument. It also fails to consider how the Second Sex is Philosophy.
"I recommend checking out Nancy Bauer's excellent book on de Beauvoir, Philosophy and Feminism, for more on the philosophical importance of the Second Sex."
This is an example of the intersection of copyright law and feminism, and not a very happy one. The idea that I'm either going to have to stay alive until 2056, or become fluent in French, to read the Second Sex as Beauvoir intended it to be read, is very depressing. There may be underground unauthorized translations out there, and the Internet would be a perfect distribution tool for them, but how many scholars capable of doing or recognizing better English language versions want to risk civil or even criminal liability to make them accessible? Cases like BMG Music v. Gonzalez suggest even downloading an unauthorized version of a book could lead to serious legal consequences. Once again copyright law is preventing rather than incentivizing the creation and distribution of important ideas and expression.
Update: Many interesting comments at Alas, A Blog. Here is the slightly edited text of my contribution to the discussion:
When the government brings the force of law to bear to prevent a person from using particular words or images to communicate, and/or to prevent her from distributing or reading certain words, to some of us that seems a lot like censorship. Copyright laws are a restraint on speech, but one that is tolerated by the First Amendment because the copyright system is supposed to incentivize the creation and distribution of useful, creative works. That's not what is happening here.
The copyright laws contain provisions for the compulsory licensing of musical compositions. If a musician wants to "cover" an existing tune, the composer of the song cannot prevent this, but is entitled to a reasonable royalty (caveat: I am oversimplifying the law a bit here - the copyright owner does get to control the first commercial exploition). In my view, the same sorts of rules should apply to translations, but they don't, for political reasons rather than "moral" ones. Unless organized, monied interests desire this change, however, it is unlikely to occur.
Like most authors, Simone de Beauvoir probably had to capitulate to every demand made by her publisher just to see her book in print. Copyright laws could be re-written to at least slightly improve the balance of power between authors and publishers, but don't hold your breath waiting for that to happen.
Wondering WWJD on Chistmas Eve?
According to Sarah Silverman, he'd "Give the Jew Girl Toys." Not particularly work safe, unless you work some place cool like the ACLU.
The Scared of Santa Photo Gallery
Many more photos of terrified and/or miserable children here. Via World O'Crap.
Jesus is With You Always
Whoa, sure to offend the humorless. It's a parody of this site.
Ding Fries Are Done
December 15, 2005
I'm Guessing Some Sivacracy Readers Will Agree...
| You Are Italian Food |
 People love you, but sometimes you're just too much. |
The Grouchy Old Woman of Christmas
That would be Pinko Feminist Hellcat.
See also: Fluid Pudding.
December 14, 2005
Activist Judge Cancels Christmas
"Why did the bad man take away Christmas?" 5-year-old Danny Dover said. "I made a card for my mommy out of paper and glue, and now I can't give it to her."
"Shortly after Dover issued his statement, police kicked down his door, removed his holiday tree, confiscated his presents, and crushed his homemade card underfoot."
The whole sordid tale is here.
Kids' Letters From Terrorist Camp
December 13, 2005
Memoirs of a Geisha: A Warning to Iraq
The cover story in this week's Newsweek Japan is "Nihon o goyaku suru amerika" (basically, "Why Does America Mistranslate Japan?"), and it's clearly a response to the release of Memoirs of a Geisha. The articles point out that the film -- noted in Japan largely for director (and Madison, Wisconsin native!) Rob Marshall's decision to cast Chinese rather than Japanese actresses in the lead roles -- is a bizarre misrepresentation of the lives of geisha. In one of the articles, Japan Times film reviewer Mark Schilling, who had served as an advisor on the set of The Last Samurai, explains how that film got many technical details right but also mischaracterized the samurai.
I was here in Tokyo two years ago when The Last Samurai opened, and I find the general reaction here to the two films fascinating, though I should add that Memoirs of a Geisha has only been screened a few times, and will open nationwide later on. The Last Samurai was widely praised, especially on the massive chat room Channel 2 (Sorry, Japanese only, and trust me, the creative expressions on the site are a fascinating guide to the changing nature of written Japanese online). Young nationalists in particularly loved the "realistic" portrayal of the bushido, the "way of the warrior."
The historical construction of the Bushido is itself pretty fascinating, especially in the famous book on the subject by Nitobe Inazo, a famous Meiji-era scholar and diplomat who wrote Bushido: The Soul of Japan in English. Nitobe, a Quaker who explicitly hoped to merge Japanese culture with Christianity, uses the book largely to link the samurai tradition with European notions of the knighthood. He subtly hints at this on page 1: "Chivalry is a flower no less indigenous to the soil of Japan than its emblem, the cherry blossom...."
But The Last Samurai takes the glorification of samurai warlords to remarkable levels. Stephen Hunter's justifiably poisonous review of the film in The Washington Post (reprinted here) points to some of the problems. I will add that the Ken Watanabe character in the film is based on Saigo Takamori. In the film, he splits from the government and starts a civil war to protect the samurai tradition. In reality, Saigo split from the Meiji government because he wanted to attack Korea right away, and other members felt this might weaken Japan vis-a-vis potential predators among the Western nations. For some reason, the film decides not to portray Tom Cruise as an advocate of an invasion of Korea. Other aspects of the samurai code in the film -- such as the samurai character's decision to spare Tom Cruise's life, bring him back to his village, and have him shack up with his sister -- also seemed a bit off, at least as far as history goes. I thought the film had hit its high-water mark of historical absurdity in the scene when Ken Watanabe joins a community theater performance immediately before the entire village is attacked by ninja, but near the end of the film, Tom Cruise delivers a lecture in English to the Meiji Emperor about what it means to be Japanese. Go back and read that sentence again. Let it really sink in.
So the fact that many Japanese nationalists loved The Last Samurai speaks volumes about their commitment to historical accuracy, and makes me a mite suspicious about the immediate critical reaction here to Memoirs of a Geisha. Let me say that I'm not trying to defend the latter film, despite the director's hailing from Madison. I felt badly duped by his last film, Chicago, since I anticipated that the appearance by Queen Latifah might actually make it not suck. The film, of course, was excruciating, and my intense boredom with it was shaken only by my fears that I would suffer a fatal seizure from the rapid editing (presumably designed to make it harder for me to determine whether or not Richard Gere was doing his own footwork).
But I suspect that the criticism here really has a lot to do with the decision to cast Chinese actresses in the Japanese roles. At the moment, China and Japan are...well, let's just say that things aren't going all that smoothly between the two friendly rivals. Tokyo's governor, rightist Ishihara Shintaro, has said that Chinese have criminal DNA. And Chinese protests against Japan earlier this year were large and violent enough to unnerve not just Japanese but other Asian nations as well. They even worried the Chinese government, which is -- as the tragic shooting of protesters last week indicates -- concerned about any movement that might be turned against the Chinese state. Time magazine's online edition has a neat little feature on the view of China from Japan and view of Japan from China.
So, from a political perspective, having Zhang Ziyi play Sayuri, the geisha from Arthur Golden's novel, wasn't necessarily the smartest move. And there are good reasons to be troubled by the casting decision, in terms of what it says the shallowness of efforts to "appreciate" Asian cultures. As Ed Gonzalez writes in his review of Memoirs of a Geisha:
Since the dehumanizing Memoirs of a Geisha's view of Japanese culture isn't designed for people familiar with the works of Mikio Naruse, Yasujiro Ozu, or Kenji Mizoguchi, but rather a mainstream crowd that fondly remembers singing "Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees, look at these!" as children, it only makes sense that this three-ring show's actresses hail from the only foreign film its target audience is likely to have ever seen.
This article quotes the excellent Boston University anthropologist Merry White, who says:
Americans are too often oblivious to distinctions between Asian cultures, and Hollywood should not be encouraging that....History has to be recognized. The world is watching us, to see how we see them.
In the same article, Marshall defends the decision by saying:
I'm not doing a documentary of the geisha world -- this is a fable....I'm very proud of an international cast. It is a celebration of the Asian community. I think it brings the world together.
Judging by the reaction in Japan and also in China, I'm going to ask Rob Marshall to do the world a favor and stick with movies about the United States in the future. Why not a musical about his hometown, Madison, Wisconsin? I mean, it's not like Japan and China need another reason to be pissed off at one another. Given the fact that Japan will likely revise its constitution to allow more space for military action, and the Chinese government's been trying to extend its own naval capability, probably best not to make any more overly stylized period pieces that collapse cultures and play primarily to American stereotypes, as well as to Hollywood's worst instincts.
Supporters of the Iraq war repeatedly invoked the occupation and democratization of Japan as a model for Iraq, even citing John Dower's superb book Embracing Defeat as a bit of a guide. Dower responded with typical brilliance. But no one mentioned the creepy postwar obsession with remarkably orientalist notions of Japanese culture, continuing even through the current era of samurai-and-geisha crapola, and what this might imply about future Hollywood representations of Iraq.
In the decades after the end of the Iraq occupation (likely to take place in about 2055), will we have similar Hollywood razzle-dazzle about life in Baghdad? If left to the creative team behind Memoirs of a Geisha, I assume it'll be a flamboyantly colorful musical, with Israeli actresses playing the leads. It'll be a celebration of the Middle Eastern community. It'll bring the world together.
Bad Sex
Update: See also very bad advertising using sex, via Feministe.
Maybe I Need To Step Away From The Computer For A While...
December 12, 2005
Things You Should Read
The Christmas Resistance Movement
Homepage here. Via the Leiter Reports.
December 11, 2005
Digital Library of Appalachia
Here. Yet another reason to love these here Internets.
A Christmas Story In 30 Seconds
Better Late Than Never
Quirky Online Advent Calendar; after the intro, click where it says "Find Today!"
December 10, 2005
Baby Bush Toys
Worst Case Scenario
I don't really understand the economics of blog advertising, and this post suggests that I might not be the only one.
Really Sad.
This. Be grateful for things you have, and for unknown blessings already on the way.
December 9, 2005
C.I.A. Sabotage Manual
Christmas Rhapsody
Does this song parody support or undermine the War on Christmas? Via Fluid Pudding.
December 8, 2005
Google Kills Children
For The Closeted Luddite
The Fourth Carnival of the Feminists!!!
At The Happy Feminist. I haven't read many entries yet but here is an early favorite: Birkenstocks Cause Feminism!
December 7, 2005
Blogs May Be Closer Than They Appear
Generate your own loopy warning label here. Via Pen-Elayne.
Superhero or Household Cleaner?
A surprisingly difficult test! Maybe it wouldn't have been if I cleaned more. Via Pen-Elayne.
December 6, 2005
Bird Flu Symptoms
December 5, 2005
Flying Spaghetti Monster Hat
Christmas Cards From Betty Bowers
Order here.
How Convenient That The Envelope Went Missing
Read this, and see if it doesn't strike you as strange that no one can figure out where the card came from, to say nothing of the rather problematic logical leap that a Cindy Sheehan supporter would be sending cards to wounded soldiers that say "Die!"
Eggplant, iPod, Light Beer
But Can You Teach?
Great article about faculty hiring at community colleges by M. GARRETT BAUMAN in the Chron. Below is an excerpt from the section on job talks:
"One man illustrated proper logic with this syllogism:
All men are mortal.
Socrates is mortal.
Therefore, Socrates is a man.
I raised my hand. "Birds are mortal too, aren't they?" I asked, hoping he would correct his error.
"Yes," our teacher agreed.
"So Socrates could be a bird?"
He smiled benignly. "No. Socrates doesn't have feathers."
The Literary Side of Scooter Libby
The blog Late Reviews and Latest Obsessions contains a very hilarious review of "The Apprentice" by Scooter Libby. Below is an excerpt:
"Holy bleeding Jesus what a pile of dreck and dross, the kind of fourth-rate mimicry of third-rate imitators of second-rate passages from the lesser short stories of a college sophomore Faulkner fan. And the whole book has that kind of empty phrasings that just drone on and on and make you feel sleepy time always. The book is only some thirty pages over 200 and I found myself struggling and slogging through it for more than a solid week, making fists and forcing myself onward, ever onward. I made coffee thinking it was me, but even with half a pot stewing in my veins, I just kept drifting. It’s not that Libby never gets off a decent turn of phrase or a poetic image or a fine insight, it’s just that there are only five of these altogether, so you get one every forty-six pages."
December 3, 2005
Tennessee Even More Uptight Than South Carolina?
I doubt it, but that state is giving us a run for the money.
Is the "War on Christmas" Also Based on Lies and Cooked Intelligence?
Update: See also Rox Populi.
Update #2: Carnival of the War On Christmas at World O'Crap. Best line by SZ: "My mother used to bake the best Christmas cookies -- you could really taste the Christ in them. (I think her secret was molasses.)"
December 2, 2005
Cursing Winnebago Pitchman
How Not To Be Insane When Accused of Racism
To celebrate Day After Blog Against Racism Day: Terrific advice by Ampersand.
Here's a related anecdote: In the context of lecturing her class about negotiating techniques, a colleague observed that certain strategies could really "chew down an opponent." However, what many in the class thought they heard her say was "Jew down an opponent," and they didn't much like it. She was horrified, but with absolute grace and composure she apologized, explained herself, and then apologized again for using a term that in retrospect could be (and was) easily misunderstood in such a negative way.
She could have gotten all defensive and indignant, and asked how anyone could POSSIBLY think she would say such a thing. But she didn't, and she made the correct call, and she taught her students (and me too) an important lesson.
Where are the nude male avatars?
... ask the folks at New Game Plus ...
Update: See also Copy This Blog.
Right Wing Rock
December 1, 2005
Wolf Dressed in Feminist Clothing?
I don't have too much left to say about the Hirshman article (see post below); so many interesting reactions have already been blogged (see links in post below), and Hirshman herself has surfaced in the comments at Alas a Blog and Echidne of the Snakes (it looks like she supercopied the same comment into the comments sections of both blogs). Which is a better place for her to be than my e-mail inbox, where one of her missives said in pertinent part: "I will say this: I have answered almost none of the hysterical internet commentators on my article, because I am not interested in engaging in dialogue with people whose thinking cannot sharpen or challenge my own." (I'm now fairly confident the e-mails actually came from Hirshman - I will issue a correction as necessary). So now according to Hirshman we are "hysterical" too.
William Sjostrom at AtlanticBlog, in a post entitled "The Irrelevance of Modern Feminism," said: "Two days ago, I noted with some amusement a feminist, a retired women's studies professor no less, complaining vehemently about women who opt to raise a family rather than work for a paycheck, as modern feminism apparently requires they do." Modern feminism DOES NOT require this; there are a world of feminists that Hirshman doesn't speak for. She is, as MUBAR puts it, a wolf dressed in feminist clothing. Packed in Saccharin said: "I like to think of feminism as a movement about equality and creating choices and opportunities for women. Not dictating what those choices should be. Hirshman can bite me. If this is the future of feminism, count me out." Given the reaction of the blogosphere, I'm cautiously optimistic that Hirshman is NOT the future of feminism, and will not be misperceived as such. Here is paragraph from Echidne's response that I wish I had written:
...."I am not denying that people have strong opinions on whether to have children and on the way to bring them up, just as they have on the type of car to drive or whom to vote for. But hidden in these strong opinions about children and childrearing are strong opinions on how women should behave, how women should lead their lives, and given this I'd expect that people would think twice before giving me their opinions on the whole womankind. When they don't I get truly pissed off, because we rarely if ever tell the whole class of men how to lead their lives or even how to be good fathers. And also because it is impossible to be both a Good Woman and a Good Careerist, given the definitions we have chosen to use." ....
If Hirshman was trying to stir things up to improve her prospects for a book contract, I'll have to assume she suceeded. The wingnuts will certainly enjoy haranguing the rest of us with all the little gems that can be extracted from her article to illustrate the loathsome elitism and anti-family agenda of feminism; the prospects of an entire book to mine probably have them salivating on their keyboards.
November 30, 2005
Completely Awesome Display of Holiday Lights Set to Music.
How hard is it to shoot a lock off?
Harder than you might think, according to this site.
November 29, 2005
"The Sims" Music Video
Shark-Fu Had Jury Duty
Her full account is here. Below is an excerpt:
.... "8 o’clock in the motherfucking morning! Jesus, a bitch is glad my ass didn’t go to law school! Not that a bitch saw any lawyers there at 8 o’clock in the morning…they may have been there, but this bitch could barely see anything with only one fucking cup of coffee in my system and 2 fake-assed government regulated pseudo-Sudafed." ....
Bad Vibes
Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.......
From the website featuring the above photo (you can see the URL, I don't much feel like linking...):
"Several people have written to me asking about this website's name, the Christian Underground, wanting to know why I would choose such a name.
"I chose this name as a practical reality as well as in a small way a political statement. Being a Christian in modern America is becoming more and more a dangerous thing. Christians in the workplace, children in our schools, leaders in our community, are penalized (Some times prosecuted) for standing up for their Christian held beliefs. This trend is growing faster and faster.
"We know dark days are ahead for Christians, the bible tells us this. That does not mean we cannot be active. It is not hard to envision, near in the future, when publicly discussing issues of deeply held biblical belief, that Christians will be arrested for "Hate Crimes".
"Early Christians faced this as well, and they met "Underground" (Literally) to fellowship and discuss their faith."
Here's TBogg's take: "Apparently there is a movement afoot in America to rould up all the Christians and nail them to crosses and then feed them to lions and then burn their bones in bonfires made of confiscated Bibles... and I never got the memo."
Funny Cat Videos
Here. Via Bitch, Ph.D. The cheesy background music and honking laughter make me suspect it was culled from a television show.
November 28, 2005
Hot Girl-On-Girl Action...
American Art: The Blog!
Eye Level is the Smithsonian American Art Museum's blog. Via Rox Populi.
November 27, 2005
Althouse Scarry
I found this interesting site comparing the 1963 and 1991 versions of Richard Scarry's Best Word Book Ever via Althouse. The main difference is that both women and men are engaged in a wider variety of employment and activities in the 1991 version. Althouse suggests this is "political correctness."
The alterations are an accurate reflection of positive changes in society for women, and the changes probably make the book more apealing and marketable to book-buying consumers. That Althouse would characterize this as "political correctness" would tend to suggest anti-feminism.
Three out of Twelve Prominent, Gifted New Yorkers are Female
Ann Althouse Sounding Like a Feminist
At least in one of today's posts: And as an added plus, it is at least plausible that she is subtly ragging on the NYT.
Remembering the Past: Japanese American Civil Liberties Cases
"Judgments Judged and Wrongs Remembered: Examining the
Japanese American Civil Liberties Cases on Their Sixtieth Anniversary," a special issue of Law and Contemporary Problems, is now available online here. Via Is That Legal. This symposium issue is dedicated to the memory of Fred Korematsu, a personal hero of mine. He is in the photo below.
November 26, 2005
A Bit of Editing Creates a Swearing Contest Between Bush and Blair
The Top 15 Movies About Thanksgiving
15> Dude, Where's My Carving Knife?
14> 9 1/2 Beaks
13> Saving Private Ryan Some Pie
12> Grease-y
11> Sweet Potato's Baadasssss Pie
10> Poultry Goosed
9> The Hand That Drops the Ladle
8> The Silence of the Yams
7> Waiting to Unbutton My Pants and Exhale
6> The Inedibles
5> Avian vs. Predator
4> How Stella Got Her Gravy Boat
3> Beltloose
2> Thaw II
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Movie About Thanksgiving...
1> Having Potroast 'Cause the Gobbler's on Fire
From Topfive.com.
Althouse Update
I've been reading "Althouse" ever since she posted about the misogynistic attacks she has received, and wondered why feminists weren't rushing to her defense. She has an eclectic eye, and a witty but somewhat unpleasant tone, though it is no worse than that of many other routinely churlish bloggers. Recently she posted this:
"Before you link to a blog...
...do you look around a while to make sure there isn't a post that depicts an act of violence against you?
Me neither.
Ever link to a blog, maybe even a few times, and then later discover a post that depicts an act of violence against you?
Well, I have."
In comments to the post, she reports:
"...I just had a horrifying experience, and I don't exactly want to link to the blog post in question! I'm sure not trying to connect to the character. I just regret linking to him."
What happened to her is scary. You can go to her blog to read more. So, this feminist noticed, and is waiting to see whether Althouse will link (in a rhetoric manner, not necessarily a linking link way) this episode to some of the abuse other women bloggers receive.
Feminist Critique of Poultry?
A little artfully placed aluminum foil during roasting, and you carnivores could have had a holiday bird that looked like this one.
That War On Christmas
First this. And then...
The Heretik has the story.
November 23, 2005
The Panama Canal
November 20, 2005
Glitter Graphic
Make your own here.
Weekend in Chicago
I attended the "Creative Processes and the Public Domain" Conference last friday at the John Marshall School of Law, and had a wonderful time, because so many nice, smart, interesting people participated. Afterwards walked around Chicago's Loop area (which people actually living in Chicago probably call something slightly different, but I think at least the "Loop" part is right) and then yesterday hit some museums and the top of the Sears Tower, and the Navy Pier, and finally took in the new Harry Potter movie. Didn't run into Oprah even once, though.
Chicago, at least that section of it, is so clean! Much less litter in evidence than one finds in NYC, Philadelphia or even DC, and the streets and sidewalks seemed to be extremely well maintained. Got panhandled a number of times, but one of the friends accompanying me is very generous and softhearted, and I think the panhandlers could sense this somehow with their dollar-dispener radar.
The beautiful architecture and wide sidewalks of downtown Chicago made walking a pleasure, though warm clothing was certainly a plus and our hairdos got a bit wind-tousled. The Pompeii exhibition at the Field Museum was remarkable, both astonishing and sobering. The Sears Tower observation deck was primarily all about waiting in long overheated lines, and someone there seriously needed a diaper change, but the view was impressive. Later, the Apple store was a good place to sneak a look at our e-mail for free.
Took the train to and from O'Hare Airport, and the $1.75 fare is an incredible mass transit value. It cost $8 just to get from the movie theater to our hotel in a taxi, a journey of about 10 blocks (hey, it was late, dark and cold). Lots of abrasive crazies on the trains though. One tirade in particular lasted a good 20 minutes, ignorable at first, but then it became apparent that the shouter wasn't carrying a cell phone and the loud angry monologue was directed more or less at us. Eventually he wound down into a mumble, and finally he left the train without smacking anyone, as he had been threatening.
The Smith Museum of Stained Glass at the Navy Pier was amazing, and free (well technically free, but you have to run a gauntlet of pizza, fudge, cheese fries and cinnamon roasted nut vendors to get there), and seeing the new Harry Potter movie at the IMAX Theater there probably would have been nice, if there had been any tickets left by the time we thought of it. Ultimately got to see the picture at an ordinary theater, and it was pretty good, though the sex sterotyping was rather heavy, and a lot of important details were glossed over or omitted, and all the actors had preternaturally clear complexions for teenagers.
November 17, 2005
Arthur Silber Talks About Sex
November 16, 2005
Vermont Farm Game
The Year of Spaghetti
Thanks to the New Yorker for posting Haruki Marakami's newest contribution, The Year of Spaghetti for free on the website. Murakami's work is always worth reading, particularly his sprawling, messy, utterly compelling novel The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle. For a lovely introduction to his work, try his story "Honey Pie," which is part of his heartbreaking collection After the Quake. I found the full text online here. Google indicates that "Honey Pie" is still available on the New Yorker site here, though I'm getting a "Not Found" message. But the page still shows up in Google's cache.
Part of the reason I was so happy to find Murakami online was that I had just plowed through the leaden prose of Bob Woodward's statement -- really, the right word in this case, given the stiff form of every declarative sentence -- about his role in the Plame case. Bob, please, I'm begging you: team up with Carl Bernstein again. You need a writing partner.
Incidentally, this page's definition of "declarative sentence" is actually an eerily close imitation of Woodward's writing style, needing only the words "Cheney" and "Chalabi" to make the illusion really stick.
Women and Blogging
Three links!
The Third Carnival of the Feminists
SadieMAG's "Broads on Blogs"
A law review article by yours truly: Women in the Web of Secondary Copyright Liability and Internet Filtering
November 15, 2005
Doghouse Riley on Dateline on Jesus' Birthday
UFO Maps
Not a single recent sighting in South Carolina!
Update: UFO reported at Myrtle Beach; yet another tourim draw for that area!
Blue Balls
November 14, 2005
Punctuation Porn
Via Scrutiny Hooligans.
November 10, 2005
An Eye For Annai
Random Links
One recumbent bike rider in OR is a little touchy. I have a recumbent bike, and people point at me and laugh when I ride it in South Carolina, which kind of stinks.
Overview of pesticides in produce. Good marketing tool for organic famers.
1959 radio report on the "Beat Generation." Unintentionally hilarious.
Get Your War On The new strips are amazing, as always.
Optical illusion involving kitten. Best ever.
"Virtual property" market booming. "Virtual real estate lawyers" already salivating.
Lettuce Pray as Pastafarians
Our spaghetti
Who art in the colander
Hallowed be thy sauce
Thy serving come
Thy strands be wrung
On forks as they are on spoons
Give us this day our daily meatball
And forgive us our starchiness
As we forgive those who are starchy against us
And lead us not into Kraft parmessan
But deliver us from Chef Boy Ardee
For thine is the garlic
And the onion and the bay leaves
For ever and ever.
Ramen
From Tattered Sleeve.
On the Second Day of the War on Christmas . . .
Read World O'Crap, where SZ almost makes you feel sorry for Wal-Mart. Also maybe more attention will help SZ with her lifelong ambition of making it to the wingnut list of The 52 Most Dangerous Liberals in America.
November 9, 2005
A Modest Proposal For Regime Change
Another Election Result
Robert E. Lee did not triumph in his race for a San Diego District 2 City Council seat. As The Poor Man noted: "Another punishing loss for the Confederates, who have really been struggling for the last 140 years."
Bringing down Google one license plate frame at a time
From Scott's "SiteExperts" Place:
Forget products, forget competition. I came up with a foolproof strategy to bring down Google!
"First, let's assume you have billions of dollars burning a hole in your pocket. Rather than invest those billions in great products, invest that money in license plate frames - yes - license plate frames. No, I am not investing in a prison employment program.
"For a novelty, I decided to order a Google license plate frame from the Google store. The frame costs $1.20 shipped to your door. At first I felt guilty buying a product from Google. Imagine my delight when I saw my $1.20 frame cost google $2.67 to ship. That is a loss, ignoring overhead and product costs, of at least $1.47 a unit! Then I realized, I found the solution to all our Google competitive woes.
"Last quarter, Google made $1.578 billion dollars in revenue and earned $381 million dollars. Now, we want Google to lose money so let's do a little quick math. $381,000,000/1.47 = 259,183,674 license plate frames need to be purchased. So, I figure for a mere $311,020,408, you could have pushed Google into the red last quarter.
"See... a simple solution.
"Until I come up with $311 million feel free to visit the Google store and pick-up your own license plate frame. Together with 259 million of our closest friends, we can start putting an end to Google.
"Any resemblence to a real business plan is purely coincidental. If you ever see such a plan, run away fast, but don't forget a license plate frame on the way out."
Via Myopic Zeal.
The Booty Ye Deserve
Action News Report: Profanity On The Airwaves
Here. Oh, I probably should have noted that this is decidedly NOT work safe. Apologies if you have been fired.
More Evidence That The DMCA Is Destroying Our Cultural Heritage
You can no longer watch Leonard Nimoy perform "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins" at this site.
Professional Chewing Gum?
Orbit Professional Sugarfree Gum. Does that make other Wrigley products "amateur" or "working class"?
November 8, 2005
Yo-Yo Tricks
Quirky Web Movie
"Copy Goes Here." It's work safe, if you are allowed to goof off and watch quirky web movies (with sound) at your job.
Checking Back In With The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
November 7, 2005
Burma Shave?
Mercy Buttercup Reviews Kitchen Gagetry
In a blog entry called Kitchen Talk, Part I, Mercy Buttercup wrote:
"I recently became determined to start cooking more often again, somehow overcoming the obstacle of its not being all that much fun when you've got bone deposits in your wrist and recurring cases of tendonitis and carpal tunnel & cubital tunnel syndromes to deal with. And the other obstacle of having a giant baby that can totally tackle my ass if I try to do anything not involving him.
"So I've been doing a ton of research on gear that will help with those problems, in addition to hauling out my cookbook stash and figuring out what I need to add to said stash. And when I put several weeks' worth of research into something and am successful, I feel I should share with someone, just in case they need the same information. In this case, I guess I'm sharing with you, my faithful readers, and anyone who types a felicitous combination of words into Google. Hi, felicitous Googlers!
The Gadgetry.
"First, let's talk about the things I bought to (a) save my poor, crippled arm and (b) thwart the boychild. I wanted to keep it to a minimum, as we have a pretty small kitchen...
"The thwarting often requires a way to start cooking when the kid was napping or otherwise engaged, rather than at the time anyone actually wants any food. Like the busy housewives of the 1970s, I turned to Our Friend the Crockpot....."
She makes a number of product recommendations you can read at her blog (see above link) and I'm hoping Part 2 will include some goood crockpot recipes, because mine hasn't seen any action in years, mostly due to my mushy vegetable aversion.
Flute 'N' Veg
If the costumes don't immediately make you want to rush to their website to book them online, here are some testimonials about their performances:
"Their expertise and commitment were highly valued on this momentous occasion"
Cergio Prudencio, Director OEIN, La Paz Bolivia
"Fantastic performance! Unique, enthusiastic and dynamic"
SciTech, Perth
"highly skilled musicians with an understanding of remote communities and an ability to transfer skills to young people"
Cathy Cummins, Kununurra Youth Arts Festival
"They enrich and enlighten the school and community, creating an awareness of our diverse society"
A. McLaren, Principal, Kununurra High School
"Their interpersonal skills and talents are exceptional!"
J. Mumme, Principal, Kiwirrkurra School
"Kerry and Alain are consummate professionals whose unique approach to music is enhanced by effective audience management"
Barry Palmer - Musica Viva
When they give "enriching" concerts to school-aged children dressed in that fruit, I've little doubt that their "effective audience management" skills are extremely useful.
Chung and Povich? Together??? Be still, my beating heart
The great news is that Connie Chung is coming back to TV in an MSNBC program that she will co-host with her husband, Maury Povich. According to the NYTimes article:
Mr. Povich said he had several reasons to do the show, not the least that he hoped to give viewers a glimpse of spirited discussions that, for the most part, have only been seen by dinner guests at their apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan.
I've been dreaming in vain for years of being invited to dinner at the Chung/Povich household, ever since the night a few years ago that I saw the last fifteen surreal minutes of an episode of Chung's CNN show. Having already done an interview about a bear attack, and then gotten birthday greetings from legal analyst Jeffrey Toobin, Chung was now asking a golfer Rich Beem about his 2002 PGA tournament victory over Tiger Woods, taking pains -- I'm serious -- to point out that her prep for the interview had been a conversation with an apparently hyperactive Povich:
Good for you. And then there were two critical holes that my husband was telling me about, the 11th hole and the 16th, right?
After the "interview" ended, Chung went to her final commercial break, and upon her return, she was dialing the phone on her desk. All of this comes directly from the CNN transcript:
CHUNG: And we'll be right back.(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
CHUNG: So I'm calling my husband because I want to find out what he thought of the interview with Rich Beem. What do you think? With Rich Beem.
You did? Really? You won't believe what he said. OK. Good.
OK. Rich Beem has a chance to do it all over again, beat Tiger Woods. Good night.
Yes, that's right, Connie took the last few minutes of her show to call and chat with her husband while closing out the show. We didn't hear Maury's trademark croak, fortunately, but other than that, I really felt that I was actually rudely interrupting a private moment. Except that she was on the air and was actually telling us, the viewers, that she was going to take a moment to call her husband to ask how he liked the interview she had just done with Beem.
Again, this isn't as good as being over to their house, but I thank God they realize that I'm far, far more interested in their lives than I am in sports, or the "criminalization of politics," or some stupid Iraq War thingy. I didn't think that anything could replace Bill O'Reilly as the televised Nietszhchean abyss that you can feel staring back. But I believe that I stand corrected.
November 6, 2005
Folks Go All Photoshoppy on Richard Scarry's Head
Clutterers Anonymous
November 4, 2005
Real Shoot 'em Up Stories About Guns
Sometimes The Market DOES Solve
It tastes like bathroom cleanser.
November 3, 2005
Wooo-eeee, something is weird here
Following the advice of Brett Frischmann at Madisonian Theory (a blog that features the writings of three of my very favorite IP Law Prof colleagues, but don't let THAT frighten you away from them...), I checked out some of Amazon.com's "Purchase Circles." The list for the University of South Carolina includes two diet books, the Chicago Manual of Style, and an Al Franken book. Could Amazon.com possibly be confusing us with that other USC?
Then there is the "Federal Judiciary" list, which includes one diet book; one Franken book, one by Molly Ivins, "The Secret Life of Bees" by Sue Monk Kidd (a novel set in South Carolina that I liked but almost everyone else in my bookclub HATED), and one "out of print" book ("The Bounty: The True Story of the Mutiny on the Bounty" by Caroline Alexander) which somehow got the number 2 slot despite being, well, "out of print." The list is topped by "The Two-Income Trap: Why Middle-Class Mothers and Fathers Are Going Broke," by Harvard law prof Elizabeth Warren and her daughter, Amelia Warren Tyagi. Are Federal Judiciary book buyers academically interested in bankruptcy, or severely underpaid?
The "Purchase Circle" for NYU doesn't have any diet books, instead featuring the 2004 Zagat Survey of New York City Restaurants. Pretty cool. Number one on that list, however, is "Handbook of Mortgage Backed Securities" by Frank J Fabozzi. I almost fell asleep just typing the title.
November 2, 2005
Carnival of Feminists, The Second
I just couldn't bring myself to call it "Number 2." Anyway, it's here.
"Christian" Movie Ratings and Reviews
All the below text was supercopied (in an exercise of fair use, of course) from The CAP Movie Ministry.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory:
Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
martial arts violence
light action violence, repeatedly
animal attack of little girl, no gore, not graphic
Impudence/Hate (I)
"spoiled brat" and social warfare disrespect, repeatedly
one use of the three/four letter word vocabulary before a child
child showing lust for video game killing
adults truing to coerce child out of special possession
"gross-out" humor, slicing a huge bug with a machete then licking the bug guts off of it
"gross-out" humor, eating bug squeezings
bickering between child and adult
father showing cruelty to son
child ignoring his father's command
child running away
name-calling throughout the factory tour
Sexual Immorality (S)
statue nudity
sexual innuendo about a little girl not touching a male squirrel's anatomy
female mannequin in underwear
Drugs/Alcohol (D):
drinking, once
Offense to God (O)
none noted
Murder/Suicide (M)
none noted
Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit:
Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
gunfire to kill, repeatedly
slapstick violence, repeatedly
reckless gunfire
irresponsible handling of a firearm
reckless driving to pursue
fighting to settle differences
drawing of a beheaded man with blood spurting out of the neck
threat with firearm
Impudence/Hate (I)
none noted (issues of hatred expressed by violence were incorporated into Wanton Violence/Crime)
Sexual Immorality (S)
sexual innuendo, repeatedly
rear male nudity
male character with a flowery purse
male character wearing only a box with "May contain nuts" printed on it.
Drugs/Alcohol (D):
beer ad on building wall
Offense to God (O)
mockery of the clergy
shape-shifting
Murder/Suicide (M)
none noted
*******
NOTE: We received four donations in October. If there are no more donations between now and November 4, an analysis of Chicken Little will not be published. Nor will there be any analyses in November if donations do not increase greatly.
The 2005 Darwin Awards
Here. I guess it would be wrong of me to point out how many "winners" are male.
Fafblog Cheers Me Up
November 1, 2005
Depressing But Informative...
Echidne: What An Odd Coincidence: Rumsfeld getting rich off flu pandemic fears
Daily Kos: What's At Stake: Jenny's Story
Steve Gilliard: They Think Liberals Are Stupid
Hilzoy: Health Savings Accounts
Mother Jones: House bill restricts voter registration drives
Crooked Timber: Keep Your Eyes Off My Content
October 31, 2005
The Attack On Halloween
Happy Halloween!
Transylmania!
Here! Via Pen-Elayne.
October 30, 2005
Quick Diversion
This Quiz is Silly, but I *Am* a Librarian Wannabe
You are a Revisionist Historian. You are the Clark
Kent of postmodernists. You probably want to
work in a library or in social services. No
one suspects you of being a postmodernist...
until they read your publications!
What kind of postmodernist are you!?
brought to you by Quizilla
October 29, 2005
When Lack Of Health Insurance Leads to DIY Medicine...
Chapter 7
Removing A Malignant Brain Tumor
In This Chapter
Proper Tools For A Real Headcase
Having Fun With Cancerous Neuronal Tissue Removal
Where To Go From Here (Other Than The Bathroom!)
It is finally time to get started with your first human neurosurgery procedure! Pat yourself on the back, because you have gone through a lot of preparation to get to this point. For those of you who might be jumping ahead to this chapter (shame on you!), let’s quickly summarize what we have discussed so far: In Chapter 1 we learned all about the medical profession, including how to dress and talk like a real doctor. In Chapter 2 we took a tour of the human brain, where we learned about the two lobes, and how different regions of the brain are responsible for different behaviors (and how I’m missing the region that understands how to prepare my taxes!). We then moved on in Chapter 3 to learn the names of the common surgical tools that we will encounter as neurosurgeons. In Chapter 4 we took a humorous detour to examine the crazy beards of famous doctors from times past. Then in Chapters 5-6 we practiced our first surgical techniques on cantaloupes and household pets. (Sorry Fido – I guess we could have used a little MORE practice!) Now we are finally ready to do our first neurosurgery operation on an actual person. I hope you are as excited as I am, so get your malpractice lawyer ready (just joking!), and let’s start cracking some skulls!
This procedure, like any complex surgery, can get pretty difficult. Since your patient’s life is in your hands, you want to be sure that you are fairly familiar with this material before getting started. It is suggested that you read through this chapter at least twice.
Jack O'Lanterns Sure to Give You An Inferiority Complex About Your Own Sorry Pumpkin Carvings
Many more here.
Rusty Is A Homosexual
Story here. Be sure and read the P.P.P.S. at the bottom if you have trouble discerning satire.
October 27, 2005
If Fox News Had Been Around Throughout History
October 24, 2005
Tarleton Gillespie on Fair Use and Blackboard
His article, "Between What’s Right and What’s Easy" from Inside Higher Ed, is a wonderful exhoration to educators to boldly employ fair use, even as we split infinitives.
October 23, 2005
The War On Christmas
Read the reviews, (e.g. "This one is up there with Plato's Republic, Aristotle's Ethics, Dante's Inferno, and The Left Behind Series. Cogently argued, thoughtful, bold, outside the box thinking from America's finest living reporter. Comparable in American letters only to Paine's "Common Sense," in which this book abounds. Every single fact was checked, and re-checked against reality. And if the liberals can succeed with Christmas, wait till they get their greasy little hands on Good Friday. The mind reels."), but if you buy the book someone should pinch you hard. Via Jesus' General.
Halloween Pet Costume Contest
Many of these pets look embarassed, but also well fed, unlike most human models. A bunch more photos and lots of corporate sponsor propaganda here.
October 21, 2005
Maybe I'll Just Stick to Beer...
...because then I don't have to choose between drinking Wheat Thins, or pencil shavings:
"...have had a lot of great vintages of Dom Perignon, but I do not remember any as impressive as the 1996. Even richer than the brilliant 1990, the 1996 is still tightly wound, but reveals tremendous aromatic intensity, offering hints of bread dough, Wheat Thins, tropical fruits, and roasted hazelnuts. Medium to full-bodied, with crisp acidity buttressing the wines wealth of fruit and intensity, it comes across as extraordinarly zesty, well-delineated, and incredibly long on the palate. Moet-Chandon deserves considerable accolades for this prodigious example of Dom Perignon. Anticipated maturity: now-2020.... This features floral, candied citrus, pencil shaving and hazelnut aromas and flavors. It's fresh and focused, with a firm structure offset by a mouthfilling richness and a lacy texture. Not a blockbuster, but seamless and seductive in its approach. Drink now through 2010."
Internet Tour of an Artichoke Farm
Brought to you by the California Artichoke Advisory Board. A fairly difficult crossword puzzle involving artichoke trivia and pitched at children is available here, see "Kids Corner."
October 20, 2005
"The Adventures of Maple Syrup Zap"
October 19, 2005
Air Raid Sirens
Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
A whole page of them here, some with visuals.
Knitting a Visual Political Statement
"Concept: Suspend 1500+ hand-knit mini red sweaters from a tree.
Participants: Anyone who can knit or crochet!
Purpose: This project is an art installation that was inspired by the war in Iraq. Its purpose is to spread public awareness, encourage thought, and inspire discussions about war and current events without promoting a specific view.
Credits: This project began Saturday, February 19, 2005 in San Francisco, California at 1:32am by Nina Rosenberg."
Walk - Don't Walk Hacks
The third one of course is for Siva (I'm a Yankees fan too, sorry Mel). More here. Via Arse Poetica.
BlogHer Con '06
Papercasting.net
October 18, 2005
Boondocks Promos
They Want A "Curry and Rice Girl"
Not sure what to make of this but it made me laugh so I'll assume it is intentional satire. Your mileage may vary. Not to be taken internally.
October 14, 2005
Kitty Litter Cake for Halloween
Recipe here. If "Kitty Litter" is an operative trademark, I'm guessing that sooner or later Kitty Litter Inc.'s lawyers are going to want the name of this disgusting dessert changed to "Cat Box Filler Cake."
Odd aside: Someone in South Carolina registered "Kitty Litter" as a trademark for greeting cards.
The Jazz Page
It's here and it's cool!
October 13, 2005
British Library Online Gallery
October 12, 2005
I Wonder If You Can Cheat Your Way Past The Document Production Levels
Capcom has released a video game about lawyers:
SUNNYVALE, Calif. - October 11, 2005 - "All rise! Capcom® today announced the release of Phoenix Wright™: Ace Attorney for Nintendo DS™, the first in the popular court room battle series from Japan to be released in the US. While the series’ previous three entries appeared on the Game Boy® Advance system in Japan, this marks its debut on the Nintendo DS. Not everyone is innocent until proven guilty! Players star as a defense attorney, who must prove his seemingly guilty client’s innocence no matter how dire the circumstances may seem. The game presents twisting storylines and intriguing gameplay in a comical anime style. Players must collect evidence, weed through inconsistent testimonies, and overcome corrupt agendas to ensure that justice prevails. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney is now available at retailers across North America and carries a “T” rating for teen audiences by the ESRB (Entertainment Software Rating Board)."
October 11, 2005
Carhartt Introduces Rugged Work Thong
Yep, it's the work of The Onion.
From TopFive.com: The Top 14 Stories in the Flying Spaghetti Monster Bible
The Top 14 Stories in the Flying Spaghetti Monster Bible
14> David takes out the giant with a week-old, hard-as-a-rock
meatball.
13> The third seal is broken and the Antipasta lets loose the
Four Hors D'oeuvres of the Apocalypse.
12> As the Flying Spaghetti Monster lies dead in the refrigerated
tomb, the giant cheese wheel is mysteriously rolled away from
the opening. Three days later, his leftovers are reheated
again, and behold! He is delicious!
11> At the first Nativity, the Three Wise Guys bring gifts of
tomato, garlic and onion.
10> The Flying Spaghetti Monster causes the Israelites to wander
for 40 years through the dessert.
9> From the mountain, Moses brings down the Ten Condiments.
8> Lot's wife turns back, and is transformed into a pillar of
parmesan.
7> Noah builds a zucchini ark, then sets out to find two of
every type of pasta.
6> The parting of the Red Sauce.
5> Moses wanders in the desert for 40 years, earning the
reputation of worst pizza-delivery guy EVER.
4> The angel Gabriel announces the coming birth of the savior
to a bottle of extra virgin olive oil.
3> Pontius Pilate orders the Flying Spaghetti Monster thrown
against a wall to see if he sticks.
2> Adam and Eve order the apple pie and are kicked out of the
Olive Garden.
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Story in
the Flying Spaghetti Monster Bible...
1> At the last spaghetti supper, His Holy Noodleness is
betrayed by disciple Atkins Lowcarbiot.
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2005 by Chris White ]
October 10, 2005
Mimi Smartypants Update
Excerpted from her blog:
"This weekend is my sister's wedding---I don't have to do much except shepherd Nora through her flower-girl performance, be in some pictures, and read a poem solely in order to drag out the non-religious ceremony. I printed out the poem to get a feel for how it would read out loud, and I noticed some awkward parts that just did not scan, and some adverbs (ugh: adverbs should be a last resort in poetry), and some places where I really felt there should be punctuation. So guess what! I edited it! I know, it's wrong on a whole bunch of copyright and other levels, but the poem is by no means well known and if I can produce a smoother read and a smoother ceremony by changing a few words, so be it. My only concern is that the poet will somehow hear of this and I will be sued or beaten up. WELL, BRING IT ON, YOU ADVERB-LOVING BASTARD!"
Burning Man 2005 - The Comic Book
October 7, 2005
The 2005 Ig Nobel Prize Winners
From here:
AGRICULTURAL HISTORY: James Watson of Massey University, New Zealand, for his scholarly study, "The Significance of Mr. Richard Buckley’s Exploding Trousers."
REFERENCE: "The Significance of Mr. Richard Buckley’s Exploding Trousers: Reflections on an Aspect of Technological Change in New Zealand Dairy-Farming between the World Wars," James Watson, Agricultural History, vol. 78, no. 3, Summer 2004, pp. 346-60.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: James Watson
PHYSICS: John Mainstone and the late Thomas Parnell of the University of Queensland, Australia, for patiently conducting an experiment that began in the year 1927 -- in which a glob of congealed black tar has been slowly, slowly dripping through a funnel, at a rate of approximately one drop every nine years.
REFERENCE: "The Pitch Drop Experiment," R. Edgeworth, B.J. Dalton and T. Parnell, European Journal of Physics, 1984, pp. 198-200.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: John Mainstone
MEDICINE: Gregg A. Miller of Oak Grove, Missouri, for inventing Neuticles -- artificial replacement testicles for dogs, which are available in three sizes, and three degrees of firmness.
REFERENCES: US Patent #5868140, and the book Going Going NUTS!, by Gregg A. Miller, PublishAmerica, 2004, ISBN 1413753167.
ACCEPTING: "The winner was unable to travel, and deliverd his acceptance speech via videotape."
LITERATURE: The Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters -- General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others -- each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.
PEACE: Claire Rind and Peter Simmons of Newcastle University, in the U.K., for electrically monitoring the activity of a brain cell in a locust while that locust was watching selected highlights from the movie "Star Wars."
REFERENCE: "Orthopteran DCMD Neuron: A Reevaluation of Responses to Moving Objects. I. Selective Responses to Approaching Objects," F.C. Rind and P.J. Simmons, Journal of Neurophysiology, vol. 68, no. 5, November 1992, pp. 1654-66.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Claire Rind
ECONOMICS: Gauri Nanda of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, for inventing an alarm clock that runs away and hides, repeatedly, thus ensuring that people DO get out of bed, and thus theoretically adding many productive hours to the workday.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Gauri Nanda
CHEMISTRY: Edward Cussler of the University of Minnesota and Brian Gettelfinger of the University of Minnesota and the University of Wisconsin, for conducting a careful experiment to settle the longstanding scientific question: can people swim faster in syrup or in water?
REFERENCE: "Will Humans Swim Faster or Slower in Syrup?" American Institute of Chemical Engineers Journal, Brian Gettelfinger and E. L. Cussler, vol. 50, no. 11, October 2004, pp. 2646-7.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Brian Gettelfinger and Edward Cussler
BIOLOGY: Benjamin Smith of the University of Adelaide, Australia and the University of Toronto, Canada and the Firmenich perfume company, Geneva, Switzerland, and ChemComm Enterprises, Archamps, France; Craig Williams of James Cook University and the University of South Australia; Michael Tyler of the University of Adelaide; Brian Williams of the University of Adelaide; and Yoji Hayasaka of the Australian Wine Research Institute; for painstakingly smelling and cataloging the peculiar odors produced by 131 different species of frogs when the frogs were feeling stressed.
REFERENCE: "A Survey of Frog Odorous Secretions, Their Possible Functions and Phylogenetic Significance," Benjamin P.C. Smith, Craig R. Williams, Michael J. Tyler, and Brian D. Williams, Applied Herpetology, vol. 2, no. 1-2, February 1, 2004, pp. 47-82.
REFERENCE: "Chemical and Olfactory Characterization of Odorous Compounds and Their Precursors in the Parotoid Gland Secretion of the Green Tree Frog, Litoria caerulea," Benjamin P.C. Smith, Michael J. Tyler, Brian D. Williams, and Yoji Hayasaka, Journal of Chemical Ecology, vol. 29, no. 9, September 2003.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Ben Smith and Craig Williams
NUTRITION: Dr. Yoshiro Nakamats of Tokyo, Japan, for photographing and retrospectively analyzing every meal he has consumed during a period of 34 years (and counting).
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Dr. Yoshiro Nakamats
FLUID DYNAMICS: Victor Benno Meyer-Rochow of International University Bremen, Germany and the University of Oulu , Finland; and Jozsef Gal of Loránd Eötvös University, Hungary, for using basic principles of physics to calculate the pressure that builds up inside a penguin, as detailed in their report "Pressures Produced When Penguins Pooh -- Calculations on Avian Defaecation."
PUBLISHED IN: Polar Biology, vol. 27, 2003, pp. 56-8.
ACCEPTING: The winners were unable to attend the ceremony because they could not obtain United States visas to visit the United States. Dr. Meyer-Rochow sent an acceptance speech via videotape.
October 6, 2005
Things Creationists Hate
Here is a small sample:
Ice Ages
"Very inconvenient! They have to have occurred since the Flood, since, according to creationists, the surface of the Earth was reworked by the Flood (to create, for instance, the Grand Canyon practically overnight), which would have messed up all those marks of glaciers on the landscape. That means mile-thick ice sheets had to advance and retreat again and again, across half the Northern Hemisphere, with the speed of freight trains. (As with plate tectonics, some creationists seem to have abandoned complete denial of ice ages [even though they're never mentioned in the Bible {How could the true history of the world miss those?}], and acknowledged a single ice age, which had to have occurred within historical times.)"
Egyptians
"...who continued building their civilization and constructing monuments, and didn't bother to take notice of the worldwide flood that was supposed to be drowning them all. (Creationists estimate that the flood took place about 4000-5000 ybp [years before present], which was the height of the Egyptian civilization.) -Adam Levenstein
"To which Keith Harwood adds: The prehistory of Egypt stretches from about 8000 BCE. The history, that is, what was written down at the time, stretches from ~3500 BCE through invasions by Hyksos, Hittites, Romans, through floods, famines, insurrections, twenty-odd ruling dynasties, massive building projects, and the mind-boggling minutiae of royal bureaucracy. During this period the whole world was engulfed in a flood which scoured the land clean. And in Egypt, nobody noticed. (They didn't notice when they lost a Pharaoh under the Red Sea, either, but that was later.)"
Cyborg Name Decoder
October 5, 2005
Today is the Beginning of the World
Happy Rosh Hashana, to those who celebrate it. Site via Pen-Elayne.
October 4, 2005
Virtual Tour of the Atomic Fireball Factory
Here. It will not burn your monitor or turn your keyboard pink!
Online Museum of "Moist Towelettes"
Yes, really. Here.
October 1, 2005
Save Time and Rental Fees!
September 30, 2005
Interesting Read on the Internets
Today's Social Psychology Lecture by Rivka at Respectful of Otters.
September 29, 2005
Sucking a Fishermen's Friend Could Get You Into Trouble
Go read the eponymous posting at Blondesense.
September 27, 2005
Liberal Droning Points
Fresh from marching in DC against the war in Iraq, Roxanne at Rox Populi
posted a blog entry entitled: "Liberal Crap I Never Want to Hear Again" and noted: "Personally, I could go a whole lifetime without hearing the offkey caterwauling of "All we are saaaaaaaaaying ...is give peace a chance."
Here are a few select suggestions from her commenters:
"Hey Hey Ho Ho" -- that damn chant has got to go!
Well "the people united can never be defeated" seems to be a fairly common pre-defeat refrain.
Nothing says "serious issues are being addressed here" like an oversized paper mache head.
You can use the lyrics we invented in San Diego in 1982, when Ben Sasway was locked up there for draft resistance: "A slogan! Exhausted! Should never be repeated!"
My own contribution is that I could live without strident exhortations to walk the walk as a critical adjunct to talking the talk.
September 26, 2005
Piratical Photoshopying
Many more here.
September 25, 2005
I Read Banned Books
During Banned Books Week 2002, I participated in a display where university faculty and staff were photographed reading one of their favorite banned or challenged books. The resulting "mugshots" were posted in the library, along with copies of the books in question. As part of a campus-wide assignment, students in several classes were asked to go to the library and write about one of the books in context of Banned Books Week. This was just one of several displays and events on campus that year honoring Banned Books Week.
No, I do not have a mustache.
Freedom of Expression AND Freedom of Access
In honor of Banned Books Week, I'd like to share the following excerpt from the American Library Association's Intellectual Freedom Manual (7th Edition) -
"Intellectual freedom can exist only where two essential conditions are met: first, that all individuals have the right to hold any belief on any subject and to convey their ideas in any form they deem appropriate; and second, that society makes an equal commitment to the right of unrestricted access to information and ideas regardless of the communication medium used, the content of the work, and the viewpoints of both the author and receiver of information. Freedom to express oneself through a chosen mode of communication, including the Internet, becomes virtually meaningless if access to that information is not protected. Intellectual freedom implies a circle, and that circle is broken if either freedom of expression or access to ideas is stifled."
Banned Books Week
Banned Books Week: Celebrating the Freedom to Read is observed during the last week of September each year. Observed since 1982, Banned Books Week is a celebration of the freedom to choose or the freedom to express one’s opinion even if that opinion might be considered unorthodox or unpopular. Banned Books Week stresses the importance of ensuring the availability of those unorthodox or unpopular viewpoints to all who wish to read them.
For more information about Banned Books Week, visit any one of the co-sponsors of this event - American Booksellers Association; American Booksellers Foundation for Free Expression; American Library Association; American Society of Journalists and Authors; Association of American Publishers; and the National Association of College Stores. Banned Books Week is also endorsed by the Center for the Book of the Library of Congress.
September 24, 2005
T-Shirt Obituaries
Here.
Office Slang
No one uses these in South Carolina, at least not in front of me. Nevertheless, here are some samples, from officeslang.com:
Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. “I dunno, ask Rick. He’s our alpha geek.”
Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.
Batmobiling - putting up emotional shields. Refers to the retracting armor that covers the Batmobile as in “she started talking marriage and he started batmobiling”
Beepilepsy - The brief siezure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid-sentence.
Betamaxed - When a technology is overtaken in the market by inferior but better marketed competition as in “Microsoft betamaxed Apple right out of the market”
Blamestorming - A group discussion of why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
September 23, 2005
Do The Suggestions Come From Bush?
From a FAQ page maintained by the Atlantic Oceanographic and Meteorological Laboratory (AOML), one of the Oceanic and Atmospheric Research (OAR) Facilities of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA).
"During each hurricane season, there always appear suggestions that one should simply use nuclear weapons to try and destroy the storms. Apart from the fact that this might not even alter the storm, this approach neglects the problem that the released radioactive fallout would fairly quickly move with the tradewinds to affect land areas and cause devastating environmental problems. Needless to say, this is not a good idea."
Via Feministe.
Liquid Sculpture
Liquid Sculpture "is the process of creating shapes by dropping and splashing water, or other liquids. These sculptures are then photographed, since they last only a few thousandths of a second."
Many more photos here.
Ways To Mess With Your Colleagues!
Download file (Powerpoint required, unfortunately).
September 22, 2005
Making Coffee Safe For Conservatives
Cripes, maybe I'll have to let go of my utter contempt of Starbucks, now that it turns out that Starbucks peeves off the wingnuts.
September 21, 2005
More About The Changed Attitude
Via Carl Bialik, today we learn that the tiny bit of empirical work upon which rested the NYT article critiqued here (and by many other fine blogs such as Echidne of the Snakes, Culture Cat and Feministing) is called into question by a skewed sample and leading questions.
Arrrr!
Sivacracy has been pirated! Apparently some holidays just can't be limited to one 24 hour period!
I Probably Need To Get Out More...
...because this is the funniest thing I've seen in quite a while:
Friday Cat Blogging (Worksafe Edit)
September 20, 2005
Very Cool First Amendment Project Fundraiser
Described here!
September 19, 2005
Interesting Use of "Knock-Offs"
"The Yves St. Laurent and Tommy Hilfiger labels may be phony, but the thousands of Hurricane Katrina victims getting knockoff items seized by federal customs officials probably don't mind.
"Displaced survivors in the Houston Astrodome can choose from counterfeit and abandoned clothing, toys, and even dog food.
"More than 100,000 items were quickly taken from warehouses and more will follow, said Kristi Clemens, spokeswoman for the Department of Homeland Security's Customs and Border Protection division.
"The agency has some 1 million items stored, and Customs officials are going through their inventory to see what else would be useful. While the initial shipment went to Texas, officials are looking toward a wider distribution, Clemens said.
"For humans, virtually anything that you can wear is available: underwear, jeans, baseball caps, T-shirts, shoes and socks. For dogs: much needed food. For children, toys. For everyone: clean sheets and blankets.
"Clemens said officials are looking for locations to deliver items in Louisiana and Mississippi, and then will scout for shelters in other states.
"American businesses lose up to $250 billion annually from knockoffs, according to figures released in a Senate hearing. Federal officials seized $138 million in counterfeited goods last year, up from $94 million in 2003.
"Counterfeit clothing currently accounts for about 18 percent of seized items.
"Law enforcement officials and other experts have testified that counterfeit clothing and other goods have been traced to supporters of terror organizations.
"Most counterfeit items come from China, the United Arab Emirates, Pakistan and Russia, according to Customs officials."
It's Talk Like A Pirate Day
I don't really understand this, but if it annoys the RIAA and MPAA, it can't be all bad!
Take "The Official Talk Like a Pirate Personality Inventory (TOTLAPPI)" here.
[*Note. School Psychologists, Social Workers and Clinicians should be wary of using the TOTLAPPI when qualifying students for IDEA services, DSM IV identifications (under any axis) or as a part of any professional assessment. Medical professionals are hereby cautioned not to use the TOTLAPPI as a tool to determine appropriate medications and/or dosage. Lawyers are hereby notified that the results of the TOTLAPPI are not admissible in most state and federal courts with the notable exceptions of The Bahamas, French New Guinea, Madagascar and Wyoming. Amnesty International has requested a moratorium on the TOTLAPPI in Death Penalty Cases until the American College of Psychiatry and the British Psychological Association can complete a twelve-year longitudinal study into the TOTLAPPI's efficacy rate and cultural bias. This tool was designed for use solely by Pirate Captains and Web Surfers. Please do not attempt this in any professional setting.]
September 17, 2005
September 16, 2005
The Great Wall of Sivacracy
You can write on it by clicking the link below. Anything rude will be scrubbed off, unless it amuses me. You can create your own wall here. Update: Whoops, accidentally erased everything while trying to fix a typo, sorry about that.
Click here to sign my Graffiti Wall! (Powered
by
PicLibs.com)
September 15, 2005
Book Covers for Jack Kerouac's "On The Road"
Karma Ghost
Click here and then on the yellow link that says "Watch This Movie."
September 14, 2005
The Encyclopedia of Stolen Ideas
"the encyclopedia of stolen ideas was founded in late summer 2000 as a cooperative project that aims
- to steal ideas
- to collect stolen ideas
- to collect ideas about stolen ideas
- to develop ideas on stolen ideas
- to steal stolen ideas"
Help Keith Knight Raise Money For Hurricane Victims
Che-sus
I thought at first this BBC News article was satire, but apparently it is for real:
"... on Tuesday, the Churches Advertising Network (CAN) launched its Christmas campaign. CAN has created Christmas and Easter advertising for churches since 1991, most famously with the controversial image of Jesus in the style of Che Guevara in 1999, with the caption, "Meek. Mild. As if."
"Here again the church was consciously attempting an image makeover, for Christ himself this time. Not everyone liked the new look. The former Conservative MP Harry Greenway called it "grossly sacrilegious", and the Catholic Church in England and Wales pulled out of CAN, questioning the whole idea of putting God in the marketplace: "We haven't got a product to market."
"It clearly had enough impact, however, for the 2005 campaign to resurrect the Che Guevara image, though this time, for Christmas, with the face of a small child. "Dec 25. The revolution begins."
September 13, 2005
Chase Me Ladies, I'm in the Cavalry
If you have a weird, warped sense of humor, like some of us here at Sivacracy, you will love this blog. Here are a few quick snippets:
CURSING IN THE ARMED FORCES
Letter to Tom Delay (called myself Dingethorpe to throw him off the scent):
Dear Delay,
I am deepy concerned about the prevalence of cursing in the armed forces. I have met several soldiers and their language is often appalling, even the officers. It is one thing to say "Oh, d____," when one is under attack by Arabs; quite another to go around saying, "F___, f___, f___," all the time. This is the langauge of the tavern, sir, low and swinish. My son would like to join the army, but he is understandably concerned about being exposed to such brutishness.
Cursing is the sign of a limited vocabulary, and it sets a bad example to the Iraqis. What is your policy about it?
Best regards,
Reginald Dingethorpe
P.S. I am also concerned that you refer to yourself as a "whip". My wife and I are Christians, and we are not sure what to make of this. ....
IS THIS A LIBRARY OR A BORDELLO?
TO A MUNICIPAL LIBRARY, ANCHORAGE, ALASKA:
Dear Sir or Woman,
I would like to apply for the position of Chief Librarian. I don't come cheap, I'm afraid, but if you want the best you've got to pay. I'll require $800,000 and my own telephone, but you'll probably recoup most of that when I start firing people. I'll also be needing a secretary (I don't do blondes. If I turn up and it's a blonde, or a fat chick, heads will roll. I mean it.)
Weeks [Art Weeks, Municipal Librarian] is finished. I could wipe the floor with that guy. We can't afford to be sentimental. It's time to cut costs and trim the fat if we're to keep up with China. Let's face it, Mother Teresa wouldn't get far in the cut-throat world of Alaska public libraries.
Always zap the other guy before he zaps you. There are no prizes for coming second.
Let's go nuclear!
Yours faithfully,
Harry Hutton
P.S. If I get the job, there'll be a little something in for you personally, if you know what I mean. I'm a guy who takes care of his own. But get on the wrong side of me and I'll make you sorry you were born.
(NO REPLY)
TO A MUNICIPAL LIBRARY, ANCHORAGE, ALASKA:
I sent this message yesterday, and I still haven't received a reply. Just what the hell is going on? Is this a library you're running... or a bordello? It's coming out of my taxes, whatever it is.
I could buy that place and have you all fired: I am very good friends with the Mayor. My aim is to drag this library or bordello into the 21st century, whatever the cost, whoever gets hurt.
The library replies:
TO HARRY HUTTON:
Sir, I'm not sure what your specific complaint is and thus do not know how to reply. The position you seek is not currently open.
TO A MUNICIPAL LIBRARY, ANCHORAGE, ALASKA:
Thank you very much for your reply. I’m sorry if I seemed aggressive- some Arabs shot my cat. I can laugh about it now, of course, though at the time I was rather annoyed.
I feel we got off on the wrong foot. The fault was possibly mine.
Are there any other vacancies that you know of? My parole officer says it is important for me to find work as soon as possible, to reintegrate into the community. Even if it’s only dusting the books, or breaking up fights. I could start at the bottom and work my way up. Is it necessary to speak Latin to work in your library?
I don’t know much Latin, but I have the gift of communicating with bears. If you like I can send you my resume.
(NO REPLY)
Kaleidoscope Painter
September 12, 2005
Beehold!
Bee dogs. They all look awfully embarassed.
Hope Takes Wing
See a beautiful piece of art at Pen-Elayne, who writes:
"The work is called Hope Takes Wing, and I know it's getting harder and harder to hope for anything positive with the folks we have currently running the country, but we need hope and love and laughter and joy in order to continue onward and be able to carry out the actions which will lead to better days. I will never stop hoping for our eventual reconciliation with our fellow Americans and with the citizens of the rest of the world."
September 11, 2005
Beaching
Yesterday I spent the afternoon at an ocean beach, with two other adults and three children, ages 9, 11 and 13. The surf was a little rough but nothing remarkable. The water seemed cold (I’m used to South Carolina beaches and this was much farther north) but I went in, as the children played at the water's edge. One adult went for a walk down the beach, and my friend Bob sat reading a newspaper up on the dry sand. There were no lifeguards, as the lifeguarding had ended on Labor Day, but the day was warm and sunny, and the beach was swarming with people. Bob had been a lifeguard when he was much younger, and we joked that he would have to guard us.
I swam out until the water was about chest deep, and body surfed a little. There were plenty of other people in the water. After a few minutes, a large man drew closer to me. He seemed to be getting swamped by waves a lot. He began doing a choppy crawl, then he grabbed my shoulder, and said in a very panicky way, “Help me! Get me out! Help me! Get me out!” Had I not been in water shallow enough to stand in, this would have pushed me under. He clutched my bathing suit strap, then let go when this caused partial frontal nudity. I had utterly no idea of what to do for him; I wanted to help but I was pretty reluctant to have him touch me again. The waves made it hard to *walk* forward, but swimming forward toward shore was relatively easy, at least for me. But the man couldn’t seem to swim, and I didn’t want to leave him. I though he was probably having a heart attack, or stroke or something. So I screamed for the children to go and get Bob.
I could see that Bob was confused for a minute when the kids reached him, he could tell I wasn’t in any noticeable trouble, but he disrobed and came out to check on me anyway, since I was waving my hands and yelling, and I pointed out the panicky man, who had drifted a little farther out. Then I swam to shore to see about getting more assistance, such as an possibly an ambulance. Meanwhile, Bob took the man’s hand, reassured him, and basically towed him to shore. The man told Bob he had been caught in a rip tide (I did not notice any rip tide…) and then, upon reaching shore, walked away without even thanking Bob or me. He apparently was not having a heart attack at all, he had simply been struggling in the water. Possibly he did not know how to swim, and had been pulled out by the current while wading.
So here is what freaked me out the most: I did not want to leave a man who apparently thought he was drowning, but I didn’t have any idea how to assist him effectively. I’m very glad Bob was there; no strangers responded to my cries for help, even though the beach was packed. Several people screamed for me “swim this way” and pointed down the beach, which might possibly have been vaguely useful if I’d been caught in a riptide, but that wasn’t the case. The panicky man did not wave or yell at all, having delegated that job to me. In fairness, he did keep getting swamped with waves, apparently not knowing how to ride them or swim through them.
I had a sleepness night, and I think I’m going to look into swimming lessons with a lifeguarding techniques component.
Cultural Losses In New Orleans
Via Dr. Bitch, here is an excerpt from a Salon.com article about the potentially catastrophic archival losses in New Orleans:
"New Orleans is home to a vast collection of archival material. Major repositories include the Special Collections departments at Tulane University and the University of New Orleans, the Notarial Archives, Jazz archives, The Historic New Orleans Collection, the city records stored in the basement of the New Orleans Public Library, the Archdiocese's comprehensive regional records, and the Amistad Research Center's collection of African American history. Among the documents at stake are hundreds of years worth of mortgages, real-estate records, marriage, birth and death certificates, manumissions, and slave sale records, dating back to New Orleans' time as a French and Spanish colony. There is original documentation of the Louisiana Purchase and the Battle of New Orleans, Confederate veterans' handwritten remembrances, city planning documents, the histories of Mardi Gras and Jazz Fest. And that doesn't even take into account the various collections of non-regional materials -- from rare science fiction and gay and lesbian collections to Amistad's collections from the Harlem Renaissance. Who knows what damage has been done to the letters, diaries, records, and book collections housed in private homes?"
September 9, 2005
Fafblog Presents: The Do-It-Yourself Emergency Management Guide!
Make-And-Bake Clay Levee!
Make flood prevention easy AND fun with this emergency arts and crafts project!
1. Mix some cornstarch, baking soda, and water in a large bowl. Make sure it's evenly mixed!
2. Cook over low heat, stirring for about 15 minutes
3. When your mixture starts to thicken, take it off the stove and let it cool
4. Mold into an 8 foot high 20 foot wide levee
5. Decorate with seashells and macaroni!
More here.
Dictionaraoke
I Got You, Babe is one of many classics, via The Singing Dictionary. Via Pen-Elayne.
This one goes out to Rox Populi. This one is for my childhood Girl Scout compatriots. This one is for Amanda Marcotte. This one is for Siva. This one is for Johnny Cash fans everywhere.
September 8, 2005
The Top 15 Signs You're Attending a Bad Law School
From Topfive.com:
15> Materials needed for Torts 101 include a baking sheet and apron.
14> Morley Safer and his camera crew are on campus more often than you are.
13> If you last the entire eight weeks, Sally Struthers personally signs your diploma.
12> Admission test, found on back of a matchbook, requires you to draw Marcia Clark's briefs.
11> Faculty recruited from the exercise yard.
10> The dean once failed to get James Earl Jones acquitted on a charge that he "talks like a sissy."
9> Professors always accept the Fifth Amendment as an excuse for not turning in homework.
8> Every question answered with, "You can't handle the truth!"
7> Two words: Dean Wapner
6> Three hours a day of chasing a little metal ambulance around a dog track.
5> In mock trials, the judge always sentences you to a spanking.
4> Today's lecture: "Fight for Your Right to Party" by visiting professor Adam "The King AdRock" Horovitz.
3> Your roommate is on a John Gotti Scholarship.
2> Can't see the blackboard over Axl Rose's hair.
and TopFive's Number 1 Sign You're Attending a Bad Law School...
1> The white wigs and black robes may be a tradition, but there's no explaining the lipstick, garter belts and high heels.
September 7, 2005
Congratulations to Elayne Riggs!
Today is the the Third Blogiversary of Pen-Elayne, one of my favorite blogs. Elayne Riggs rocks.
Another Interruption
Siva is doing a fantastic job of blogging about the culture and politics of Hurricane Katrina. I don't have anything useful to add to that discourse, so once again here is something completely unrelated: sex advice from a funny, feminist, online sex toy shop owner.
September 6, 2005
Lesser Known Editing and Proofreading Marks
Holy Sheet...Music
September 3, 2005
Theme Music
As I was driving to work this morning, I couldn't bear to listen to another minute more of post-hurricane coverage, so I switched over to a music-only station only to hear Levi Stubbs of The Four Tops wailing "Reach Out (I'll Be There)." There isn't much else that can tear you up like Motown, but I find this Holland/Dozier/Holland composition to be particularly heart-breaking right now. I'd love to quote from the song here, but I'm afraid that it might get me and Siva into trouble. So, I'll just link to another site that includes the lyrics.
September 1, 2005
Odd Mash
August 30, 2005
Hope For Us All?
These are purportedly photos of Tina Turner and Tom Cruise taken when they were young, from this site.
August 28, 2005
Help Catch a Pervert
The Christian's Guide to Small Arms
The Christian's Guide to Small Arms "was developed in response to the fact that most American Christians have fallen into ignorance concerning the responsibilities and skills required of the Christian freeman.
"CGSA is not intended to be THE definitive source on this subject, but rather a primer for the Christian who is beginning to reject the false theology that requires him to be a pacifistic patsy in the face of heathen hordes."
Stumps 'R Us
Stumps 'R Us bills itself as "A Whimsical Support Group of Cheerful Cripples Who Can Answer almost ANY question you might have about life without one, two, three or four limbs." I wonder if they have received a trademark infringement cease-and-desist letter from Toys R Us yet.
August 25, 2005
Will Jagger Get Dixie Chicked?
From NME.com:
"THE ROLLING STONES accuse US President GEORGE W BUSH of being "full of sh*t" on their new album. The track ’Sweet Neo Con’, one of the tracks on the forthcoming ’A Bigger Bang’, was already known to be fiercely anti-Bush.
"However, frontman Mick Jagger's disdain for the American leader has now been confirmed, with Rolling Stones singer revealing some of the lyrics in an interview with Newsweek.
"But the singer has revealed that guitarist Keith Richards, who lives in the US, is a bit worried about the direct nature of the words.
"An extract from ’Sweet Neo Con’ features the following lines: "You call yourself a Christian, I call you a hypocrite/You call yourself a patriot, well I think you're full of shit."
"Jagger said of the track: “It is direct. Keith said: ‘It's not really metaphorical.’ I think he’s a bit worried because he lives in the US. But I don’t.”
Meanhwhile, however, Neddie Jingo notes that the Rolling Stones have: "...a sponsorship deal with Ameriquest, one of history's rottenest predatory lenders, who are engaged in an all-out, mindbendingly expensive effort to whitewash their image. Ameriquest has dropped $1.5 million into Arnold Schwarzenegger's campaign treasury, along with plenty of other politicos from both sides of the aisle and, of course, Preznit George, who's named Roland Arnall, Ameriquest's top executive, to the ambassadorship of the Netherlands."
August 24, 2005
Your Face On A Pez Dispenser
From the Burlingame Museum of Pez Memorabilia.
Voice Over Artists
Rated R. Also rated "AM" (all men).
August 22, 2005
Howtoons
Learned about this Howtoons site from Susan Crawford's very cool blog. She reports that one of the authors of the site (and of the Howtoons): "says 10-year-old boys all want to build flying skateboards. Ten-year-old girls all want machines that will allow them to see their friends' dreams. He hopes some of those girls will grow up to be neuroscientists." These kind of gender generalizations drive me crazy. It's why I had a pink bedroom as a child despite the fact that my favorite color is actually yellow. Luckily I learned to mostly ignore those conformist impulses by my teen years. When I was a kid I wanted to build a slide that went on for five miles, that you could ride on a soft, pliable mattress which could be steered by shifting your weight. But at ten, if certain of my friends had wanted to make dream reading machines, I'd have said that too. Because I didn't want to be weird.
I'd bet there *are* generalizable differences between the things boys and girls want to build. At any rate, the Howtoons are terrific.
August 21, 2005
Disgruntled Consumerism
My very first computer, purchased in the mid 1980s, was an Apple IIC, but then I switched to PCs and the gothic torments of Windows. The day before yesterday, I bought an Apple iBook, and in some respects it was far easier to set up than the Zeos, Gateway and Dell desktops and Compaq laptop (total lemon!) that have filled the years between Apples. However, I clearly have become Windows “path dependent” and it is taking a little while to figure out how to do things on an Apple. For example, I spent a good twenty minutes (actually it was an *awful* twenty minutes) downloading Mozilla Firefox and trying to change the privacy preferences, because I prefer to have a few illusory shreds of privacy. Without having “Internet Options” as an, um, option under “Tools,” I was at a loss as to how to access the box that would facilitate this, and all the Mozilla help function did was show me a picture of the box, so I would know what it looked like in the seemingly unlikely event I was ever to stumble across the actual operative function. I tried all sorts of increasingly silly and/or complicated ways to access it, and then finally I asked myself: Could the Mac manner of doing things possibly be stupider or more counter intuitive than the Windows way? Took a deep breath, assumed the unfamiliar posture of a rational actor, years of Windows have sorely depleted my stores of common sense, clicked the word Firefox in the tool bar and found what I needed under “Preferences.” Doh.
So far I’m pleased with my Apple iBook’s performance but the actual process of purchasing it was a bit annoying, hence the title of this entry. The smartest thing I did was to research my options thoroughly beforehand at the Apple store online. I’m not including a link because then you’ll think I blog on commission, plus they owe me $100 which you will note if you are bored enough to keep reading, has me seriously miffed. Among other things I learned online was that my faculty status entitled me to an “educational” discount on the laptop, which worked out to be about $50 and was not something I would have figured out at the store. Also Apple is running two promotions, one that will get you a free iPod mini if you buy a qualifying computer, the other providing $100 towards a printer if you buy it from them contemporaneously with a computer. I went for the printer, only to find out that hundred dollars is not taken off the purchase price, but rather comes in the wretched form of a rebate, more on that in a second.
The Apple store was crowded with customers and also people looking to check their e-mail for free. I know this because I did exactly that at an Apple Store in downtown Chicago last year. In my own defense the business center at the hotel where I was staying was closed on Sundays, which is what drove me to scam the free Internet time the first time, the follow-ups being sort of gratuitous and inexcusable. Why hadn’t I brought my Compaq laptop along for the trip, you might wonder. Well, among other problems it doesn’t respond well to travel, portability apparently not being an attribute of the Compaq laptop model I stupidly selected. Jostling tends to make it fail to recognize its own power source. It also gets temperamental about acknowledging its own Ethernet card (sometimes yes, sometimes no) so I bought an external Ethernet card as back-up. Its response to this was total melt down, requiring yet another reinstallation of Windows, requiring yet another call to Microsoft requesting codes that would enable me to reinstall software like Word and Powerpoint. Yes I have uploaded them more times than my license authorizes, thanks for asking, but always on the same loser Compaq laptop, which is surely evident from my data trail, leave it to Microsoft to make the process of keeping it alive and useful even more complicated and irritating than Windows alone manages. Anyway, all these people in the Apple store were checking their e-mail at the demonstration computers and one woman carelessly left her e-mail inbox open when she departed, which I briefly considered e-mailing her friends about using her own e-mail account.
August 19, 2005
Rather Strange Barbie Hack
It's a German site but the photos seem to pretty much explain things.
Samurai Appliance Repair Man
"If I can't help you fix your appliance and make you 100% satisfied, I will come to your home and slice open my belly, spilling my steaming entrails onto your floor." Sound up!
August 18, 2005
"Pro-Life" Group Does Not Respect Soldier's "Living Will" Wishes
"Under threat of a lawsuit, Pro-Life Wisconsin pulled a news release accusing HospiceCare of murder in removing the feeding tubes of severely injured Marine Staff Sgt. Chad Simon, but the group has not, as requested, issued a public apology or retraction.
"Peggy Hamill, state director for Pro-Life Wisconsin, did not return repeated phone calls Monday for comment.
"Despite Pro-Life's refusal to issue an apology and to post one on its Web site, Hospice attorney Ian A.J. Pitz of Michael Best & Friedrich said his client would not pursue further action against the group.
"Hospice explained its decision in a written statement submitted to The Capital Times.
"Hospice regards Pro-Life Wisconsin's revised press release as a tasteless and unfounded attack on the grieving widow of a war hero, but it is not defamatory in the legal sense. Although Hospice would be entitled to a more formal retraction of the original release, out of respect for Chad Simon and his family, we do not want to prolong this controversy."
"Simon, 32, of Monona, was injured by a bomb in Iraq in November. The father of a 6-year-old son, Simon never recovered from his war injuries and his family followed the wishes laid out in his living will that he not be kept artificially alive with food and water if he became permanently incapacitated." [Emphasis added].
Continue reading ""Pro-Life" Group Does Not Respect Soldier's "Living Will" Wishes" »
Business Cards of the Officers of the Starship Enterprise
Full set here.
The Top 15 Signs You're Being Stalked by Martha Stewart
15> Mysterious late-night phone calls: "I can't stop thinking
about you... and that's a good thing!"
14> Contents of your curbside recycling tub stolen and replaced
with juice can pencil holders and milk carton flower vases.
13> On her show she makes a gingerbread house that looks exactly
like your split-level, right down to the fallen-over licorice
downspout and the stuck-half-open graham cracker garage door.
12> You get a threatening note made up of letters cut out of a
magazine with pinking shears, and they're all the same size,
the same font, and precisely lined up in razor-sharp rows.
11> Size 6 Bruno Magli imprints on all your doilies.
10> You find your pet bunny on the stove in an exquisite tarragon,
rose petal and saffron demi-glace, with pecan-crusted hearts
of palm and a delicate mint-fennel sauce.
9> The unmistakable aroma of potpourri follows you -- even after
you leave the bathroom.
8> You discover that every napkin in the whole friggin' house has
been folded into a swan.
7> No matter *where* you eat, your place setting always includes
an oyster fork.
6> Annoying crank phone calls begin with, "Hold, please, for
Ms. Stewart."
5> Twice this week you've been the victim of a drive-by doilying.
4> That telltale lemon slice in the dog's water bowl.
3> The sharpened macaroni shells underfoot in the bathroom are
stained to match the shower curtain.
2> You wake up in the hospital with a concussion and endive
stuffing in every orifice.
and TopFive.com's Number 1 Sign You're
Being Stalked by Martha Stewart...
1> You awaken one morning with a glue gun pointed squarely at
your temple.
From TopFive.com!
August 17, 2005
Inflatable Church!
Rent one here. The company's somewhat incomprehensible promotional video available here. Prefer to wed in an an inflatable pub? Other inflatable structures available here as well, though none are specifically designated a "library." Guess you have to buy the inflatable wedding guests elsewhere.
Conference and Publishing Opportunity for Bloggers
Boston University's Journal of Science and Technology Law has issued a CALL FOR PAPERS for "Personal Presses – The Legal Realities Behind the Blogging Revolution, A Colloquium on Blogging" to be held February 11, 2006, "to consider the legal complexities facing the growing blogging community." Their goal "is to collect a body of scholarship on the legal issues bloggers face in order to provide courts with some guidance as cases are litigated in these areas. [They] therefore welcome submissions from a broad and diverse range of voices and research areas: practitioners, judges, activists, and academics."
From the CFP:
Some questions to consider:
• Are bloggers journalists? If so, what liabilities and privileges do
they have?
• How do intellectual property laws affect what bloggers can or cannot post?
• What are the ethical issues bloggers need to consider?
• Can bloggers be fired for blogging?
• How does the First Amendment apply to blogging?
• How do jurisdictional boundaries, international and domestic, affect the legal issues potentially raised by blogging?
• How do any of these issues change with the introduction of
syndication, inline advertisements or tip jars, podcasting, or multiple authors on a single blog?
Paper proposals should include an abstract of no more than 1200 words, as well as the author's curriculum vitae. Please send proposals via e-mail in Word document format to jstl@bu.edu by September 10, 2005. Your subject line should read: Colloquium Paper Proposal: [Title]. The Journal will announce its decisions by October 1, 2005. Papers from the Colloquium will be published in Volume 12 of the Boston University Journal of Science and Technology Law.
August 15, 2005
Oooofah!
Okay, admittedly the personal privacy implications of this are a little unsettling, but the freaking hilarity factor is off the charts:
FOX UNPLUGGED: Indie rockers force Hannity to change number
BY MIKE MILIARD (from the 8/05/05 Boston Phoenix):
"A few weeks ago, we introduced you to Brooklyn indie agit-popsters Kids Against Combs, who’d just finished an album that used the private phone number of Fox News loudmouth Sean Hannity as its title.
"Sean Hannity (631) 673-8003 was set to be released on July 21 by 10-34 Records. But, according to a press release sent out last week by the band, Kids Against Combs and 10-34 were issued papers on July 15 from Hannity’s attorneys, "threatening to sue both parties if they proceeded with releasing an album named after Hannity’s home phone number and containing the political pundit’s home address in the CD’s liner notes." (The digits, meanwhile, are now disconnected; "changed to an unlisted number," says the recording.)
"The band also alleges that spies from the Hannity camp — or at least some people who "looked extremely conservative Republican" and "not the type of folk that would be at any sort of live performance, except for maybe Paul Anka or Wayne Newton" — arrived to scope out a KAC performance the next day. Luckily, the band had freshly printed copies of the album for sale, sans home address and retitled The Album Formerly Known As Sean Hannity’s Phone Number ... Currently Sean Hannity Is a Democracy Subverting Douche Bag.
"Despite the fact that 66 percent of our Style and Usage Panel prefer that "douchebag" be written as a compound word, they’re in unanimous agreement that the new title works just as well."
August 14, 2005
Public Libraries: Do you want the good news or bad news first?
Okay. Here's the bad news. As if Buffalo doesn't have enough problems, the long-promised closing of Erie County's branch libraries (20 of 52) is fast approaching. Some of the communities are hoping to come up with the funding that will allow them to drop out of the county system, although they will continue to be taxed for services that they no longer receive. However, it's unlikely that some of the less well-off neighborhoods can afford such an admirable, but expensive plan. Sadly, Buffalo is only one of several communities looking into closing its public libraries, and of those that don't, several are shrinking hours, eliminating librarians, and cutting book funds. As a graduate of UB's fine MLS program and someone who dearly loves the city, I'm frustrated, disappointed, and very, very sad.
And here's your good news. After a lively public battle over library funding (that's right library funding), Philadelphia, the birthplace of the public library, is restoring funding to its 54 branch libraries. The Friends of the Free Library of Philadelphia did an outstanding job at reminding the city why libraries are so necessary to living communities.
August 5, 2005
Simply Fired
August 4, 2005
Murals!
August 3, 2005
It's A Boy!
Anyone struggling with fertility issues should read this. Actually all y'all should read it!
First-Time Novelist Constantly Asking Wife What It's Like To Be A Woman
..."It never lets up," Becky said. "Today he asked, 'If a woman were running from a burning building, what would she be thinking about?' And I don't know how to answer that. I'd be thinking about getting away from the building, I think." From The Onion.
NB: The Crimson Petal and the White, by Michel Faber (Harvest Books 2003), is one of the best books by a man about a woman that I have ever read. I'm thinking of requesting an authorial chromosome test...
"Beautiful Girlhood" For Sale!
From this site:
"The Beautiful Girlhood Collection is our most ambitious project yet. We aspire, by the grace of God, to encourage the rebuilding of a culture of virtuous womanhood. In a world that frowns on femininity, that minimizes motherhood, and that belittles the beauty of being a true woman of God, we dare to believe that the biblical vision for girlhood is a glorious vision. It is, in fact -- a beautiful vision. It is a vision for purity and contentment, for faith and fortitude, for enthusiasm and industry, for heritage and home, and for joy and friendship. It is a vision so bright and so wonderful that it must be boldly proclaimed. We are here to proclaim it. Read the Publisher's Introduction and learn more about Beautiful Girlhood.
"Shopping our online catalog is easy. Browse our categories by clicking above or at left, add products to your shopping cart, and enjoy the convenience of secure online checkout. You will receive an e-mail confirmation of your order, and all in-stock items will be shipped out within 1-2 business days."
Link via Pandagon, where Amanda trenchantly notes that now we know where Jane Roberts is buying her children's clothes.
August 2, 2005
Giblets is Intelligently Designed!
Giblets has news - SCIENCE news! - that will shake you to the very core of your being, that will render you a gibbering lump of stammering flab with the power of revelatory truth!
Last week Giblets was reclining on the grassy banks of an elysian river when he made an alarming scientific discovery: clouds aren't shaped like clouds, they're shaped like stuff. Look! That one looks like a moose, that one's a monkey, and that one is exactly the spitting and glorious image of Giblets rendered in living cloudflesh! "I dunno," says Fafnir. "That cloud looks like a cloud." Amazing, what are the odds! Conventional meteorology is useless in the face of these amazing stuffological anomalies. The only explanation that makes ANY SENSE AT ALL is that these clouds were designed - INTELLIGENTLY designed - by some intelligent cloud-shaper in the sky!
"Giblets you have blown my puny mind!" you say. Yes yes Giblets's revelations shock you to your presidential core, but there's MORE!
The other day Giblets was looking for his glasses but he could not find them anywhere! After hours of searching Giblets was about to give up when he found them on top of his very head. How did they get there? It is an unsolved mystery which science is powerless to solve! The only rational explanation: these glasses were intelligently designed on my head by an intelligent designer with vast and unfathomable powers! "You don't have glasses," says Fafnir. Even more incredible - they are glasses ex nihilo!
Possibly related: an intelligent coin-designer may have secretly hidden seventy-three cents in the cushions of Giblets's couch.
Pop Science: Can Crush
Harry Potter And The Disgruntled Fan
Disgruntled Harry Potter Fan Releases "Corrected" Version of Book, from the Watley Review, via Pen-Elayne:
A disgruntled Harry Potter fan has released a "corrected" version of J.K Rowling's latest installment in the series, The Half-Blood Prince, prompting a storm of curiosity and support from many fans who disliked the direction of the story in the book. It has also, not surprisingly, prompted a storm of legal activity from Rowling's publishers.
"Whenever an author puts a work out into the universe, it is no longer their exclusive property anymore," said Mary Sue Pembroke, who is credited as the author of the modified book. "Harry Potter belongs to all of us, not just Rowling. She took some liberties with the story in this latest book that really weren't faithful to the logic of the narrative. My version is, I think it fair to say, much more faithful to the true Harry Potter mythos."
Rowling's book sold a record 9 million copies in Britain and the United States in the first 24 hours after its release. Despite the book's remarkable popularity, however, many fans were disappointed when the narrative did not follow their favorite predictions, in particular regarding romantic relationships between key characters.
"Rowling seems to think the relationships she's described in Half-Blood Prince were clearly telegraphed in previous books," sniffed Pembroke. "All I can say is, if that's what she thinks, she clearly doesn't understand Harry Potter like I do."
This is not the first time a fan has created a story based on an author's setting; so-called fanfiction is a popular pursuit across the internet. This is, however, the first time a fan story has captured a sizeable portion of the author's audience: over 800,000 fans have downloaded the book, many openly hostile to J.K. Rowling's narrative decisions in the most recent book. ....
Read the article in its entirety here.
(Note to the exceedingly gullible: The front page of the Watley Review also features a story headlined: "UK Brews World's Largest Pot of Tea as Anti-terrorist Measure.")
August 1, 2005
Flagged Mag
Whe reads this thing, anyway?
Mistreating the Flag
The flag in the above photo appears to be parade residue. It's been laying in a gutter near the South Carolina Capitol Building since early July.
Senator Lindsey Graham "supports granting Congress power to prohibit the physical desecration of the U.S. flag," and "an amendment to the Constitution of the United States authorizing the Congress to prohibit the physical desecration of the flag of the United States." When he campaigned for his Senate seat he ran attack ads criticizing his opponent, Alex Sanders, for opposing such an amendment. Legislation against flag desecration sometimes seemed like Graham's most important agenda item, leading Sanders to quip: "As much as he talks about it, you'd think people were burning flags on every corner, around the clock!" In an interview Sanders once said this:
"Well, [Graham] calls me a liberal and he has a picture of me carefully edited that makes it appear that I'm warming my hands over a burning flag. I'm not in favor of burning the American flag -- anybody who knows me knows that. I don't know that an American flag's ever been burned in South Carolina. That was fairly good editing that made me appear so evil and despicable. One thing that I object to about the ad is he dug up an old picture of me from the 1960s with sideburns. And then, the other thing is he questioned my judgment and he spelled judgment wrong. He spelled it with an 'e.' That's the way they spell judgment in England. Maybe that 'e' was - you remember Dan Quayle spelled potato with an e?"
Sanders would have made a great Senator. In his honor, I'm compiling a dossier of flag desecration in South Carolina: faded flags, flags with holes, peeling flag bumperstickers, flags stuck into cupcakes, used in commercial advertising, and on clothing, housewares and even beach towels laying in the sand. The minute flag desecration becomes illegal, it will be time to start dropping a dime on flag crime.
July 31, 2005
Gloria Steinem Singlehandly Subverting Civilization?
From Catch.com
"Rick Santorum was on George Stephanopoulos' This Week this morning promoting his new book It Takes a Family and, man, was it a horrible performance. After a brief discussion about Bill Frist's flip-flop on stem cell research, George read the following passage from the book:
"Respect for stay-at-home mothers has been poisoned by a toxic combination of the village elders' war on the traditional family and radical feminism's misogynistic crusade to make working outside the home the only marker of social value and self-respect."
And then the fun began:
STEPHANOPOULOS: Let's get specific here, name one or two of these radical feminists who are on this crusade.
SANTORUM: Well, I mean, uh, you know, you have, you go, you go back to, um, ah, what's her name, well, Gloria Steinem, but I'm trying to remember, ah, [tsk], eh, can't remember the woman's name. That's terrible—anyway...
STEPHANOPOULOS: Well, that's kind of an important point. You point this broad brush ... radical feminists, village elders ... name one.
SANTORUM: (talking over Stephanopoulos) There's lots of, there's lots of, well, Gloria Steinem, there's one.
So I'm trying to research Gloria Steinem's "misogynistic crusade to make working outside the home the only marker of social value and self-respect," but I keep getting bogged down (Googled down?) with sites that reference things like Ms. Magazine, her books, her introduction to "Free To Be You and Me," her expose about the poor and oppressive working conditions of Playboy bunnies, and her efforts to draw attention to the issue of underrepresentation of women in politics. I never thought she was particularly radical, but if she scares Rick Santorum that much, she must be doing something right.
Update from Dr. Bitch: *Actual quote by Gloria Steinem:
"We also have to re-define work, so that the work of caring for children and doing human maintenance in the home is counted as productive work, has attributed value."
Silence!
From McSweeney's: Things Heard During John Cage's Folsom Prison Performance of "4'33".
Oddbooks
July 29, 2005
Preacher Feature
Do you need a Holy Ghost Enema? Yikes. Via Oliver Willis.
July 28, 2005
The Ongoing Threat to America's Libraries
Utne Librarian Chris Dodge's recent article "Knowledge for Sale: Are America's Public Libraries on the Verge of Losing Their Way?" is smart and thoughtful. I'd like to add one additional resource to his list -- ALA's Office of Intellectual Freedom.
July 26, 2005
Stay Cool
Potato-Powered Web Server
If my employer got one of these, it would be an upgrade.
Post-It Lamp
Per the author: "i dressed up my old ikea lamp with some leftover post-it notes. just make sure you use a cool bulb, like a flourescent."
The Unheard Beethoven
This site "endeavors to make all of Beethoven's unrecorded music readily accessible to the public. "
As an unexpected plus, the website also illustrates that copyright laws can be asserted in reasonable and socially useful ways:
"While the Unheard Beethoven website is dedicated to the dissemination of Beethoven's work as widely as possible, the content of this site and all MIDI files contained on this site are copyrighted by Mark S. Zimmer and/or Willem (aka xickx). Fair use of these MIDI files is encouraged; we ask, however, that in connection with any such use that the arranger of that particular MIDI file be credited and the URL of the Unheard Beethoven website be listed. Bulk download and copying and/or distribution of the MIDI files on this site is strictly prohibited. No more than 25 MIDI files may be downloaded or copied in any one day by one entity without the permission(s) of the copyright holder(s).
July 25, 2005
My Goodness
Grammar Quiz
Google Moon
Confederate States of America: The Movie
The trailer for Kevin Willmott's Confederate States of America is now available on IFILM. CSA is a mockumentary (man, I hate that word) of what the U.S. might look like if the South had won. The film was well-received at Sundance in 2004. As a white, liberal Southerner, I am outraged...entertained...no outraged...no entertained.
July 24, 2005
How Amazon.com Looked 10 Years Ago
Dang. Courtesy of the West Virginia Surf Report.
T-Shirt Commentary
Available here.
July 23, 2005
John T. Scopes
Taken in 1924, when Scopes was 24 years old. His courage is awe-inspiring still. Not sure what is with that UFO in the background. Story about Scopes trial photos at the Smithsonian here.
July 15, 2005
The "We're Not Afraid" Shop
By Cafe Press. Proceeds go to the Red Cross London Bomb Relief Fund, or you can make a straight-up donation here.
July 14, 2005
Don't Torch That Flag!
Don't Tell our Instate Rival Clemson About This
Go South Carolina Gamecocks! Stay out of the soup!
July 13, 2005
Fun with Pennies
Flagging
Most of my neighbors brought flags out for the Fouth of July, and few have bothered to take them down yet, so between the fierce sun and soaking rains of a South Carolina July, they are starting to look shabby. The lawyer part of me would defend their right to treat the U.S. flag any way they like, but my inner Girl Scout isn't too thrilled about it.
Speaking of Translation Problems...
Here is one version of Deuteronomy 20:
20:10 When thou comest nigh unto a city to fight against it, then proclaim peace unto it.
20:11 And it shall be, if it make thee answer of peace, and open unto thee, then it shall be, [that] all the people [that is] found therein shall be tributaries unto thee, and they shall serve thee.
20:12 And if it will make no peace with thee, but will make war against thee, then thou shalt besiege it:
20:13 And when the LORD thy God hath delivered it into thine hands, thou shalt smite every male thereof with the edge of the sword:
20:14 But the women, and the little ones, and the cattle, and all that is in the city, [even] all the spoil thereof, shalt thou take unto thyself; and thou shalt eat the spoil of thine enemies, which the LORD thy God hath given thee.
20:15 Thus shalt thou do unto all the cities [which are] very far off from thee, which [are] not of the cities of these nations.
20:16 But of the cities of these people, which the LORD thy God doth give thee [for] an inheritance, thou shalt save alive nothing that breatheth:
20:17 But thou shalt utterly destroy them; [namely], the Hittites, and the Amorites, the Canaanites, and the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites; as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee:
20:18 That they teach you not to do after all their abominations, which they have done unto their gods; so should ye sin against the LORD your God.
20:19 When thou shalt besiege a city a long time, in making war against it to take it, thou shalt not destroy the trees thereof by forcing an axe against them: for thou mayest eat of them, and thou shalt not cut them down (for the tree of the field [is] man's [life]) to employ [them] in the siege:
20:20 Only the trees which thou knowest that they [be] not trees for meat, thou shalt destroy and cut them down; and thou shalt build bulwarks against the city that maketh war with thee, until it be subdued.
Anyone want to reduce this to plain language? Two versions are probably required, one for the bible literalists and another for those who view the bible more as allegory and less as instructional text.
July 12, 2005
Engrish.com
English is pretty much the only language I can speak fluently, and even then my grammar and spelling get a little creative at times, so it is with the greatest admiration (when's the last time you have seen an American sign translated into Japanese?) and affection that I laugh at translation oddities like these; more here. Via Pen-Elayne.
Complaint From Seat 29E
July 11, 2005
Post-It Elvis
DIY instructions here.
Compensating For Something?
Some people like large trucks, others prefer small gadgets.
Dog Retrofitting
Astromony Picture of the Day
July 9, 2005
Fashion Highs and Lows of the Westboro Baptist Church.
July 7, 2005
We're Not Afraid.
We're sad, and very angry, and we want justice in full measure, but we are not afraid.
Update - Here are two of my recent favorites:
And a couple more:
July 6, 2005
Unlikely Phrases From Real Phrasebooks
Michael Froomkin of Discourse.net is conferencing and vacationing in Greece. He manages to rub our faces in this somewhat subtly by listing "Northern Crete Weather" on his lefthand scroll bar. A bit more ostentatiously, he posted about the odd choices his Institute for Language Studys Vest Pocket Modern Greek made, such as including translations for statements like: "Alice is less diligent than Barbara," "The girl with the big brown eyes was elected the queen of the ball," and "My brother-in-law has a new truck." You can read his post here. One of his commentors helpfully included this link to a web page chock full of "unlikely phrases from real phrasebooks." Now I know how to instruct someone to "clean and set this wig" in Swedish. Also, Jon Weinberg is guest blogging while Froomkin's away, check out his stuff here. I expect he'll be adding weather reports from Detroit or Ann Arbor to the blog any minute.
July 5, 2005
I Need One Of These For My Office Wall
If only my office was as large as a car. From here.
Pages Ripped From Children's Books...By Jay Pinkerton
More here, but don't click if you are easily offended.
July 4, 2005
Stop Ranting, Start Serving...
Apologies if this has already appeared on the blog. You can buy "Operation Yellow Elephant" stuff here.
See also this Daily Kos post.
Strangest scene of all time?
While checking the copy-edited version of my book manuscript, I've got the TV on in the background. One of the half-billion HBO channels is currently showing The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. I mean, I could go on about the various problems of the movie, but why bother?
More interesting to me is that it may have the single oddest scene in film history. In 1899, legendary explorer Alan Quartermaine (Sean Connery) and his team are trying to stop some kind of shock wave that is toppling all of Venice. So Quartermaine and US Secret Service Agent Tom Sawyer (this is not a joke; if it were a joke, I would include some profanity) race through the streets of Venice in a convertible, trying to find a spot where Dr. Nemo can fire a guided missile from the Nautilus to destroy a bunch of buildings, thereby serving as kind of a firewall to protect the rest of Venice. I know what you're thinking: wouldn't this be extremely dangerous, with the army of snipers that the villains would have placed on rooftops trying to kill our heroes before they can carry out their mission? It's an excellent question, of course, but you've obviously forgotten about the sexy vampire (Peta Wilson) who summons her army of bats to provide aerial cover to the car.
I can think of worse films than this one -- I'd rather drink hemlock than watch A Beautiful Mind again -- but none with such a profoundly odd scene. Yes, I'm leaving out purposefully surreal films by directors such as David Lynch and Alain Resnais.
Anyone else know of any equally odd (by which I mean: professionally made, designed to be coherent, and yet utterly mystifying) scenes? Just a question.
Fourth of July Revelry
Is it me, or does this photo from today's NYT make Bush look like he is wearing a giant hoop skirt?
Tom Cruise Kills Oprah?
Turn up the sound and watch something very weird.
July 3, 2005
Happy Independence Day!
July 2, 2005
Duct Tape Prom Outfits
You can see a whole flock of them here. Probably doesn't sell quite as many rolls of tape as the Tom Ridge Terrorism Protection Initiative did but you have to admire the creativity.
Found A Cool SC Blog!
And I perseveringly achieved this astounding feat of stupifyingly industrious research by googling (yes, I'm using a corporate noun as a verb, primarily to mess with their trademark rights) "South Carolina blog." First result was the "South Carolina Trial Law Blog." Goober City, huh? Actually it may be of interest to my students, so I'll probably keep track of it for a while and see if it is worth recommending to them. Next result was the "Official Website of the South Carolina Democratic Party." It's kind of boring, with lots of male faces (most white) and predictable content about what an abysmal job our Republican Gov. is doing. The third result, though, is awesome: "Little Lost Robot." Dang he's funny!
Potato Chips That Proselytize
Front
Back
Bought a snack sized bag in Philadelphia a while back, and I'm still not sure what to make of it.
Interesting Superhero Comics
Batman's boners. Wonder Woman's binding games and spanking. Superman's emotional abusiveness. And much more, here. Via Tom Tomorrow.
July 1, 2005
Sew Strange!
Colorful USB Drives!
Just how jaded are New Yorkers?
I've actually had a couple of conversations with actors who have appeared in guest roles on the various Law & Order shows: Law & Order, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Law & Order: Trial By Jury, and the new one, Law & Order: Nancy Grace Talks Some Complete Bullshit and Commits Ethical Misconduct. Though, come to think of it, I might have just dreamed that I saw a commercial for that one.
Anyway, these conversations got me thinking. In all of these shows, whenever the detectives interview a witness, the witness keeps doing whatever their job is while they're answering questions about unspeakably brutal crimes. So, while the newsstand guy is setting up newspapers, he's absent-mindedly saying over his shoulder, "Yeah, so the shooter comes up around the corner, points it, blam blam, and the guy's head explodes like a watermelon. Then the shooter just starts firing at the couple coming down the street, they go down together. Hey, we gonna be done soon? The lunchtime rush is on its way." I mean, you just witnessed a triple homicide, and you can't give the detective your undivided attention for two minutes? Man, New York is a cynical town.
June 26, 2005
On "Street Diva"
Also in the latest New York Review of Books, Arthur Kempton reviews Julia Blackburn's With Billie. The book builds from interviews and "documentary scraps" made by Linda Kuehl, a Billie Holiday fan who committed suicide in 1979. The book sounds great, and Kempton's description of Holiday's life, especially her long friendship with the similarly doomed saxophonist Lester Young, is heartbreaking.
June 8, 2005
Old Boy
I just returned from a matinee of the Korean winner of the Cannes Grand Prix, Oldboy, at the arty theater in downtown Madison. Yes, I realize that the movie is old news, and I justify my own tardiness in getting to it by pointing out that (a) it takes longer for foreign films to come to the Midwest; and (b) I pretty much suck, and I often blame the Midwest (which, in my experience, is actually pretty efficient) for my own laziness and indolence.
More info and brief, unimportant, but disturbing spoilers in the extended entry.
Greetings
Siva and I had planned to have me join the Sivacracy team yesterday, but we were worried that the simultaneous releases of the new Coldplay and White Stripes albums would really suck the oxygen out of any self-introduction. Since most of my published work is targeted at mopey, lovestruck teenagers and vaguely creepy alt-country-punk fans, we thought it might be better to wait a day to hold off.
My work is mostly on Japanese politics and culture, and you can read more about me at my webpage. When I travel to Japan later this summer to begin a year's stay at the University of Tokyo, I'll probably blog a bit more regularly about matters on that side of the Pacific, especially when they intersect with the blog's larger concerns. Or when they can bring greater glory to Sivacracy. For the time being, expect a lot of misdirected anger -- drawn almost entirely from self-loathing and bitterness -- channeled at summer films.
That said, I'm honored to be on the team and I look forward to being part of the discussion.
June 4, 2005
Bye Y'all
Erin Go Bartow! Will be spending the rest of June in Ireland, with little if any blogging. Stay weird! Warmest wishes, especially to Siva and Melissa.
Cat Based versus Conventional Alarm Clocks
Cat Based Alarm Clock will not fail to wake you in the morning, even if the electricity has gone out. Cat Based Alarm Clock may wake you several times during the night as well.
Cat Based Alarm Clock is warm and furry, and emits gently purring noise. Cat Based Alarm Clock completely relentless, and lacks a snooze button.
Cat Based Alarm Clock environmentally friendly, excepting the small catachable creature portion of the environment, to which he is fatal. Cat Based Alarm Clock ultimately biodegradable, but has tendency to create massive toxic waste Superfund-style clean up sites in the litter box.
Cat Based Alarm Clock has fishy breath, which will remind you of the importance of good oral hygiene. Cat Based Alarm Clock never brushes teeth, and will yawn in your face at every opportunity.
June 2, 2005
Miss Poppy Has Outdone Herself This Time
"Accessory kit includes everything your Jesus Action Figure will need to mount a successful military campaign against His enemies and those of the One True God (TM). Includes helmet with an American flag sticker, a rifle, a sidearm, a grenade, and a knife. Six items in all. You will need to affix them to your action figure with the adhesive of your choice."
Buy it here. "Spend your TRUE Christian Dollars at MissPoppy.com, where even your MONEY is saved!"
June 1, 2005
Phone Thong
Funny? Offensive?
No One Bought The Ring at E-Bay
Possibly the photos were a turn-off, but I tend to think it could have been the associated commentary. Via Chaos Theory.
Actual Volvo Ad
ADVICE FROM A PUBLIC DEFENDER?
This was posted at Craig's List. I repost it here because though most of it made me cringe, the last paragraph ("beneath the fold" - click the link to access the second half) really zapped me. See what you think.
First, let me say I love my job and it is a privilege to work for my clients. I wish I could do more for them. That being said, there are a few things that need to be discussed.
You have the right to remain silent. So SHUT THE FUCK UP. Those cops are completely serious when they say your statements can and will be used against you. Theres just no need to babble on like its a drink and dial session. They are just pretending to like you and be interested in you.
When you come to court, consider your dress. If youre charged with a DUI, dont wear a Budweiser shirt. If you have some miscellaneous drug charge, think twice about clothing with a marijuana leaf on it or a t-shirt with the UniBonger on it. Long sleeves are very nice for covering tattoos and track marks. Try not to be visibly drunk when you show up.
"Artlike Sex Toy" Blogging
At Raging PMS, and at Blowfish. Nothing at either blog about law review articles for some reason. If you are an easily offended doofus, or you are reading this at work on filtered/monitored Internet, or you are Siva's mother, probably best not to click the links. If you are a copyright geek, think about "sculptural works" and "functionality limitations."
Update: Michael Madison has linked to this post, and referenced copyright's "merger doctrine."
May 31, 2005
Don't Just Sit There?
R.I.P. Eddie Albert
I think he would have liked this tribute.
Another Reason To Love Blogs
This blog, A Leaf Off The Page of Marita's Life, by Marita Paige, who lives in the northwestern part of the Island of Borneo in South East Asia and works in wildlife conservation.
Does Your iPod Need a Heinie?
The Old South
There is nothing funny about food poisoning, especially not when hundreds are sickened and at least one person has died. But there is some irony in the fact that the establishment the salmonella has been traced to is "The Old South" restaurant in Camden, SC, which is now closed in consequence. Will the Old South rise again?
May 30, 2005
Viking Kitties
May 29, 2005
Fussy
Anyone who has ever done (or even considered) home renovations must read this blog. Here is part of a single entry:
"So, we bought this pseudo stacking stone (it's really colored cement that's been poured into a mold) and some fake-stone-looking ceramic tile for the fireplace surround and hearth. Floyd agreed to install them for us after work one day. So far, so good. Then slowly it dawned on us that we had bought the tile and the stone at different places without having collected a sample of either one, relying on our collective visual memory and our charming naivete, then hopping on one foot and clapping our hands to wake up Tinkerbell, who would surely make sure that they would look great together.
"Well, hey! They looked like shit together. I'm not sure if my photo does justice to the life-threatening incompatibility of our fake stone and tile. Floyd obviously could only stand to put in so much of our ill-considered materials before he had to stop, overcome by a wave of aesthetic disgust."
When You Get Tired of Playing Pool...
May 28, 2005
Brain Freeze
Here is a website about drinking Slurpees too fast. What did people do in their free time before the Internets? Via Uncle Horn Head.
May 27, 2005
Why I Love Blogs
Read this. Via Feministe.
May 26, 2005
Airtoons
H-Words and B-Words
It turns out that the particular H-word and B-word that Larry Lessig did not want invoked in commentary about this article were "hero" and "brave," as he has now clarified at his blog. It is clear from the comments that readers have posted there and at other blogs (see e.g this, this, this, this and this) that others are unaware of his request, are disregarding it, or misunderstood, as I did. But if being called brave and heroic against his wishes is the worst thing that happens to Larry out of all this, not only will I not lose sleep, but my faith in humanity will increase exponentially.
As I hope is clear from the posting below, I thought he was probably trying to prevent ugly homophobic commentary linking gays with pedophilia. Worries about that would certainly be reasonable. When people reference the "N-word" they usually mean a harsh term of racist opprobrium, so I assumed that Larry was asking that the "h-word" and "b-word" (which I mistakenly assumed to be "homosexual" and "bisexual") not be invoked pejoratively. I point all this out because it is yet another reminder of how easy it is to be misunderstood, especially when the topic at issue is emotional and complicated.
May 25, 2005
Talent Show Winner
Perspectives
Larry Lessig is much in the news because of this article, very different from his usual cyberspace law beat. He discusses the piece at his blog. One of the things he asks is this: "... [F]irst a plea: that we drop the H-word, and B-word from commentary about this."
I was really confused about that at first. For me the verboten "B-word" is "bitch," a word I used to disparage other women long after I should have known better, and one that regrettably still slips out occasionally in unchecked flashes of anger. But "H-word"? Then it dawned on me that he probably means "homosexual" and "bisexual." After showing the incredible level of bravery and generousity of spirit he has demonstrated in this matter, Larry is certainly entitled to place limits on what he wants discussed at his blog, heck I wouldn't blink if he requested that comments be typed in gothic font or Morse Code, but I hope that sexual orientation becomes part of the larger conversation eventually.
One of the passages of the article that most interested me was this one:
...Then, at Yale Law School, Lessig took a course taught by arch-feminist Catharine MacKinnon and began to ponder his relationship with Hanson in a different, more sophisticated light. “There was this moment when I realized that I had been, in the traditional way, a woman in all relevant respects—totally passive, an object of sexual aggression,” he says. “I’d adopted this supportive, protective role with respect to him.” Among his many other afflictions, Hanson was an alcoholic. “There was this one time I literally saved his life,” Lessig recalls. “I came into his bedroom and he was passed out, vomiting, and I had to flip him over to stop him from suffocating. And this, I felt, was my role. I was his wife.”
I wish more had been written about what he learned from MacKinnon, and whether he has thought much about the close nexus between homophobia and misogyny. Also wish I understood what constitutes "arch-feminism" but that is a topic for another day.
Would the rampant pedophilia at the Boychoir School have been disclosed faster and more broadly if the affected students weren't petrified of being labelled homosexuals? This is far from my area of professional expertise, but I can't help believing so.
May 23, 2005
Water For Me, Thanks.
Logos and Trademarks With Something Sort of Unusual in Common
May 18, 2005
Peep Invaders and Peepsteroids
Narnia!
"The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" trailer here. It may take a while to load. I'm cautiously optimistic about this movie.
Turning Men's Underpants Into Bras
Learn how here.
The Circular Life
Space Opera
"The North Cambridge Family Opera company's "Space Opera," written in 1998 by Cambridge composer David Bass, is based on the beloved "Star Wars" film. The opera company performed the opera in March at the King Open School in Cambridge. View some featured video clips, build your own playlist, or watch the entire opera...[here]."
May 17, 2005
A Month of Softies
"A Month of Softies is a group craft project which takes place every month and everyone, all over the place, is welcome to participate." It is organized by Loobylu, the personal website of Claire Robertson, an illustrator and mother from the suburbs of Melbourne, Australia.
The April Softies are here (three pictured above). Via Misbehaving.net.
Church Signs
Cripes am I going to Hell. But can it possibly be any warmer there than in South Carolina? Generate your own church signs here!
May 16, 2005
Twice the Magnetism
Available here, via Easy Bake Coven.
If the Coffee Alone Doesn't Make you Irritable...
The Disappearing Civil Liberties Mug is covered with the complete text of The Bill of Rights, but when filled with hot liquids, select rights vanish before your very eyes!
The Female Orgasm
Interesting and provocative post at Feministe.
May 15, 2005
Little. Yellow. Sticky.
But not too sticky, and residue-free, which helps make them so wonderfully useful. Read "Twenty-Five Years of Post-it Notes," by Greg Beato, and learn:
...."In 1968, while searching for new, patentable adhesives, a chemist named Spencer Silver mixed some simple organic molecules with a reaction mixture in proportions that defied industry convention. This produced an adhesive that, in the lexicon of science, consisted of inherently tacky elastomeric copolymer microspheres. On the molecular level, this substance resembled the pebbled skin of a basketball. This characteristic sabotaged its bonding power; the tiny spaces between the microspheres made it impossible to get complete contact between the adhesive and another surface. In laymans terms, it was a glue that didnt stick very well. ....
"And then one day, in the North Presbyterian Church in North St. Paul, inspiration struck. [Art] Fry was a member of his congregations choir; before each service, he placed tiny slips of paper into his hymnal to mark the songs the choir planned to sing that day. While Minnesota Presbyterians arent especially known for their emphatic performance style, Fry still had trouble keeping the bookmarks in place. Every time he stood up to sing, the slips fluttered from his hymnal. Suddenly, though, it hit him: If he applied some of Silvers adhesive to his tiny slips of paper, his problem would be solved. The bookmarks would stay in place when he needed them to, without permanently bonding to the pages of his hymnal. ....
"While the phrase viral marketing would not come into vogue for another two decades, an epidemic hit the hallways and offices of 3M. Id give a person a pack of one hundred sheets, and that person would end up introducing the product to twenty other people, said Fry. It was a geometric expansion. Almost overnight, the co-workers who hadnt needed any more bookmarks a few weeks earlier were suddenly hitting up Fry for more samples. Sometimes, secretaries from other buildings on the 3M campus would trudge across five hundred yards of snow-covered lawn just to get another pad of notes. But even as Frys invention attracted a cult following at 3M, it remained a sideline project for him. His supervisor, a man named Bob Molenda, allowed him to charge his expenses to miscellaneous accounts, and whenever Fry was able to put aside his official assignments for a while, he continued to refine his notes. Eventually, a small team was assembled to explore the possibility of turning them into a commercial venture.
"Unfortunately, they were up against certain strong institutional biases that permeated 3M. At 3M, superior bonding power was the measure of an adhesives value, not its lack of it. In addition, there werent any rolls involved in the product. At 3M, you always had to put something on a roll, said Pat Gaudio Edwards. We were working in the Commercial Tape division, but Arts notes didnt look like tape. Thanks to such factors, there was so little faith in the commercial prospects of Frys invention that Gaudio Edwards said she was tapped to be the Post-it lines marketing coordinator because no one else wanted the assignment. Were giving the dog project to the girl, her manager told her. I hope you enjoy it. ....
Read the whole article, it's a pretty fascinating account of a large corporation that almost stifled what became a brilliantly successful product.
Scrabble Scoring
Pholph's Scrabble Generator          My Scrabble Score is: 22. What is your score? Get it here. |
Via The Little Professor.
"Gumby and Friends: The First 50 Years"
May 14, 2005
Store Wars
Boy Ads v. Girl Ads
Utopian Hell analyzes gendered advertising by ebay.
May 13, 2005
Paul Anka Covered "Blackhole Sun"
From The "Another Reason To Stay Indoors" Department
Two words that should not be next to each other: "Flying snakes."
Dang Michael Berube is Funny
Here's an excerpt from his latest:
"Five or six years ago I went to a University of Illinois hockey game. The visiting team took the ice firstI believe they were called the visitorsto the tune of the theme from Doctor Zhivago. Ha ha, I said to myself. So Illinois attempts to demoralize its opponents by having them take their pregame warmup to music associated with figure skaters. Music for swirly-men. How emasculating. Ha ha ha. But then Illinois took the iceto the theme from Rocky III, also known as Eye of the Tiger, by Survivor."
"At first I was merely embarrassed for Illinois, but on further reflection, I thought what a nightmare this would be if I were playing for Illinois. Its not merely that I dont like Eye of the Tiger, or that I think of it as practically an unwitting parody of motivational music. That much is true; anyone who wants to get me going by playing Eye of the Tiger might just as well subject me to a series of motivational posters featuring pictures of golf courses, mountains, hang gliders, and so forth. No, the problem for me would go deeper than that; its a visceral, not an intellectual, matter. Eye of the Tiger would actually derange my hand-eye coordination and turn my quadriceps to paste. There is no way I could play hockey after hearing such a song. In fact, even thinking about the song right now is messing with my fine motor apparatus and leading me to make all kinds of uncharatceristic typograhpical mitsakes."
Who Would Jesus Shoot?
Guess you can find out here.
May 12, 2005
We Don't Care How Y'all Do It Up North
Available here.
The Art of Science
Reactive Ion Mardi Gras, by David Inglis
Fallopian, by Elina Mer
Many more here! Via Crooked Timber.
404 Baby
Funny "404 URL Not Found" message here. Via Pen-Elayne.
The National Lint Project
I'm thinking this is dryer lint. More here.
May 11, 2005
Pat Robertson
Clip here of Pat Robertson on the Larry King Show, answering caller questions, and then during a commercial break, denouncing callers who challenged him as "homos."
May 10, 2005
The FBI and Louie, Louie
From The Smoking Gun:
"We've all been there. You're at a party, a bit liquored-up and dancing like a loon. Then "Louie Louie" starts to play and, suddenly, you're one of the Kingsmen. You're howling the lyrics when, during the third verse, you realize that you don't know the lyrics.
"Well, J. Edgar Hoover once found himself in a similar predicament (sort of). In the early-1960s, the FBI boss and his troops investigated whether the song's lyrics violated federal obscenity laws. Triggered by complaints from parents and other tightasses (who sent the FBI copies of the supposed "Louie Louie" lyrics), the G-men struggled to determine just what it was the Kingsmen were singing. But even when they slowed the 45 rpm single down to 33-1/3, the agents remained stymied. This was one case Hoover's boys couldn't crack."
Read excerpts of the FBI file here. Via Stone Court.
Much more recently, a middle school marching band was banned from performing 'Louie Louie':
BENTON HARBOR, Mich. (AP) -- "A pop culture controversy that has simmered for decades came to a head when a middle school marching band was told not to perform "Louie Louie."
"Benton Harbor Superintendent Paula Dawning cited the song's allegedly raunchy lyrics in ordering the McCord Middle School band not to perform it in Saturday's Grand Floral Parade, held as part of the Blossomtime Festival.
"In a letter sent home with McCord students, Dawning said "Louie Louie" was not appropriate for Benton Harbor students to play while representing the district -- even though the marching band wasn't going to sing it.
"Band members and parents complained to the Board of Education at its Tuesday meeting that it was too late to learn another song, The Herald-Palladium of St. Joseph reported.
"It's very stressful for us to try to come up with new songs for the band," eighth-grader Laurice Martin told the board. "We're trying to learn the songs from last year, but some of us weren't in the band last year."
"Dawning said that if a majority of parents supports their children playing the song, she will reconsider her decision. " ....
Good Grief
Via Uncle Horn Head.
Whoops
"Beast's real mark devalued to '616'" by Chris Wattie in the National Post
"Satanists, apocalypse watchers and heavy metal guitarists may have to adjust their demonic numerology after a recently deciphered ancient biblical text revealed that 666 is not the fabled Number of the Beast after all.
"A fragment from the oldest surviving copy of the New Testament, dating to the Third century, gives the more mundane 616 as the mark of the Antichrist.
"Ellen Aitken, a professor of early Christian history at McGill University, said the discovery appears to spell the end of 666 as the devil's prime number.
"This is a very nice piece to find," Dr. Aitken said. "Scholars have argued for a long time over this, and it now seems that 616 was the original number of the beast."
"The tiny fragment of 1,500-year-old papyrus is written in Greek, the original language of the New Testament, and contains a key passage from the Book of Revelation.
"Where more conventional versions of the Bible give 666 as the "number of the beast," or the sign of the anti-Christ whose coming is predicted in the book's apocalyptic verses, the older version uses the Greek letters signifying 616.
"This is very early confirmation of that number, earlier than any other text we've found of that passage," Dr. Aitken said. "It's probably about 100 years before any other version."
"The fragment was part of a hoard of previously illegible manuscripts discovered in an ancient garbage dump outside the Egyptian city of Oxyrhynchus. Although the papyrus was first excavated in 1895, it was badly discoloured and damaged. Classics scholars at Oxford University were only recently able to read it using new advanced imaging techniques.
"Elijah Dann, a professor of philosophy and religion at the University of Toronto, said the new number is unlikely to make a dent in the popularity of 666.
"Otherwise, a lot of sermons would have to be changed and a lot of movies rewritten," he said with a laugh. "There's always someone with an active imagination who can put another interpretation on it."
Star Wars Satanism
Goat's Head
Yoda
According to this nutjob site: "Look carefully at the two images. The one on [top] is the Satanic Symbol "Baphomet" or the goats head. It can be found on the cover of the "Satanic Bible". Now look at the one on the [bottom]. It is simply the goats head inverted. Looking at the center of the star, and the two vertical "wings" you will find your old buddy "Yoda" staring you right in the face. How many young people and adults have had that image subliminally planted in their heads is beyond estimation. Going to the movies? Think again!!"
Via Blondsense.
MyPyramid.org
MyPyramid.org is a satirical site about food brought to you by the U.S. Department of Agribusiness. Learn helpful tips like these:
"Make half your grains highly refined (or "processed"). Highly refined grains ease the digestion process by bypassing the pesky nutrient and fiber absorption step."
"While fruits may be eaten whole, buying canned, frozen or otherwise packaged fruit helps ensure the sterility of the fruit. Some fruits can be rather tart or tangy, so a smart way to make these more appealing to children is to select products with added sweetners."
"Drink milk for healthy bones and teeth! Some "scientific studies" have claimed milk has no connection to healthy bone development. These studies, however, ignore the most obvious correlation - bones, teeth and milk are all white."
Schwarzenegger Stuff
This site, "governorgirlieman.com," offers some, uh, unique products, like the ribbon above, an Arnold Schwarzenegger Chew Toy for pets, and a "limited edition bobblehead ... a tribute to Governor Girlie Man, Arnold Schwarzenegger, the sissy in a pink dress," which "weighs about the same as the Oscar that Arnold will never win!" Don't much care for the incipient sexism of some of the products and commentary, but don't much care for Schwarzenegger either, so thought I'd post about it and let y'all make up your own minds about this!
Anti-Creation Rumination
From Ruminate.com:
"I used to brake for squirrels, until I remembered Darwin and that whole "cull out the weak" thing. But when I realized that I might be responsible for a future that includes super-intelligent squirrels, I started braking again."
May 9, 2005
In Support of John Bolton
Here is Larry David on "Why I Support John Bolton" (from The Huffington Post):
"I know this may not sound politically correct, but as someone who has abused and tormented employees and underlings for years, I am dismayed by all of this yammering directed at John Bolton. Let's face it, the people who are screaming the loudest at Bolton have never been a boss and have no idea what its like to deal with nitwits as dumb as themselves all day long. Why, even this morning my moronic assistant handed me a cup of coffee with way too much milk in it. I was incensed.
"You stupid ignoramus," I screamed, doing all I could to restrain myself from tossing the luke-warm liquid in her face. There's too much freaking (I didnt say freaking) milk in here! What the freak is wrong with you?!
Im sorry, sir, she stammered. Like sorrys going to fix everything. Im not interested in sorry. Sorry doesnt cut it with me.
Look, you idiot, I continued, I wouldnt mind so much if you gave me too little milk. Little can be fixed. We can add to little.
Shall I get you another cup?
No, Ill suck on my thumb. Yes, get me another cup, you douche bag! And chew on this -- its going to cost you a dollar!
"This, of course, brought on the requisite tears. At which point I'd had enough and began chasing her down the hall where she took refuge in the bathroom. Boo-hoo. Poor thing!
"Meanwhile, Im the one who had to go into the kitchen and make my own coffee! And guess what? I missed a very important phone call from this masseuse whom Id been trying to get an appointment with forever!!
"(Sorry about all the exclamation points, but you can see how worked up I get over this Bolton business!)
There is one thing, though, Ill guarantee: that will be the last time she puts in too much milk. So get to work, Bolton. Show these other countries whos the boss."
Ampersand on the Wage Gap Myth
Alas a Blog has an interesting series of posts on the wage gap between women and men. Below is an exerpt from one titled: Myth: The Wage Gap is Caused by Mens Higher Pay for Dangerous Jobs:
"Several academic studies have found a significant connection between risk and higher wages. These studies generally dont include agricultural workers - which is possibly a problem, since this cuts out the US workers who face the highest risks for the lowest pay. Furthermore, these studies usually dont account for the differences in pay between industries - meaning that they can easily mistake the higher industry wages in an industry like construction or mining, with higher pay for risks.
"How do we know that higher average pay in those industries arent premiums paid to workers in physically risky jobs? By comparing employees who face comparable levels of risk in different industries. A secretary working for a mining firm is not more likely to die on the job than a secretary working for an elementary school, for example. But when economists J. Paul Leigh and Jorge A. Garcia compared clerks across industries, they found that the so-called danger premium paid to construction and mining workers applied even to clerks facing no danger. The standard economic theory - stating that firms pay a premium to workers facing a higher risk of death or injury - cannot explain why a construction firm would choose to pay a low-skill clerk much more than an insurance firm would."
Persepolis
Persepolis is a graphic novel by Marjane Satrapi: "Satrapi tells the story of her life in Tehran from ages six to fourteen, years that saw the overthrow of the Shah's regime, the triumph of the Islamic Revolution, and the devastating effects of war with Iraq. ... Persepolis paints an unforgettable portrait of daily life in Iran: of the bewildering contradictions between home life and public life and of the enormous toll repressive regimes exact on the individual spirit. Marjane's child's-eye-view of dethroned emperors, state-sanctioned whippings, and heroes of the revolution allows us to learn as she does the history of this fascinating country and of her own extraordinary family."
Jesus Spotted in Ultrasound
Pope Ratzinger Purging "Liberals"
Echidne of the Snakes reports: "Pope Benedict XVI has been busy with some spring cleaning. Out with the old and in with the new! And in particular, out with the old moldy liberals." More at her blog.
May 8, 2005
Funny Toon
Kenya. Via Bitch, Ph.D.
Conflicting Tombstones
Watermelon Sculptures
More here. Under U.S. laws, copyright protectability of these incredibly creative works is iffy due to "fixation" concerns, but copyright protection of the *photographs* of the works is certainly available, which is kind of strange if you think about it.
Cool Dali Site
Origami
From the Robert J. Lang Origami site.
Christian Cheerleading Association
From this site: "CCA (Christian Cheerleaders of America) is a non-profit organization for the purpose of ministering to Christian schools by encouraging excellence in Christian Cheerleading and service to the Savior."
Do you suppose they cheer things like "Crucify the opposing team!" or "Two point CHRISTIAN conversion!" at football games?
Update: Uh Oh!
(via World O'Crap)
Another Alternative Clock
Here.
Some Things I Learned in NYC!
1. Lots of copyright thoughts from the Correcting Course conference at Columbia that I'll probably blog about in days to come.
2. Siva and Melissa are really fun to hang out with (sort of knew this already).
3. Librarians are superior human beings (actually I already knew this too).
4. New Yorkers wear a lot of wordy T-shirts, one of my favorites asking "Do I look like a fucking people person?"
5. The Diane Arbus exhibit at the Met is terrific.
6. MTA cards expire no matter how much money you have left on them, so you better have lots of quarters if you plan on taking a bus from the airport.
May 4, 2005
Wacky Packages
Bacon Bandages
Available for purchase here. Do you suppose there is a tofu version for vegetarians?
May 3, 2005
How to be but not too much a, well, you know....
Amanda at Pandagon comments upon an article at MSN on sexy dressing, and in so doing has become my new arbiter of style.
Book Review
Gen. J.C. Christian, Patriot, reviews a book of photographs from the Sorry Everybody website here.
This is an excerpt: "Unlike the authors of this book, I'm not sorry that Our Leader is still president. Thanks to him, Iraq now has better torture and rape rooms than it ever did under Saddam. "
Apartment Therapy is Running a "Smallest, Coolest Aprtment" Contest
View the finalists here. They are so tiny! And two people live in some of them!
Run Again!
So here is something the church of the so-called "Runaway Bride," Peachtree Corners Baptist Church, has posted at its website:
"Many have inquired about the well-being of Jennifer Wilbanks and John Mason. Our church is attempting to support the couple as much as possible. We do want to state that we believe in the sanctity of marriage and that purity should be maintained until after the wedding.
"It is our understanding that John and Jennifer have maintained purity in their relationship with each other and that their relationship is platonic. While we do not condone living together before marriage and we were not aware of this temporary housing arrangement, we are grateful for the above explanation of purity.
"Please join our church family in prayer for this family. Our heartfelt thanks goes to all who have sacrificed time, prayed and sent encouragement to these families in their time of need."
May 2, 2005
Newspaper Comics
My local newspaper, The State, runs a fairly bland selection of comics. The only ones I generally read are "Classic" Peanuts, Jump Start, Sally Forth, For Better or For Worse, Dilbert, Doonesbury, Overboard, Funky Winkerbean and Foxtrot. The paper isn't free speech oriented enough to run comics like Boondocks, it actually censors Doonesbury on a fairly regular basis. Many of the strips that do run, like Garfield and The Family Circus seem like wastes of perfectly good ink to me, and strips like Blondie, Cathy, LuAnn, Beetle Bailey, Hagar The Horrible, Wizard of Id, Shoe, Dennis the Menace, etc. are generally so drenched in sexism and stereotyping that I simply avoid them. Then there are the soap opera strips like Mary Worth, in which the boring, predictable and often sexist story lines. take. freaking. forever. to. unfold. Yet even among the stunning array of inanity and offensiveness that The State comics pages feature, B.C. usually manages to out offend its competitors. Hagar the Horrible has Helga, Beetle Bailey has Sgt. Louise Lugg, Blondie has Mrs. Dithers, and Wizard of Id has Blanche, but B.C. just calls its obligatory obnoxious, self-centered, ugly, heavyset female character "The Fat Broad." So it was with some amusement that I read this at TBogg this morning:
"One wonders if Johnny Hart sees any irony in drawing a comic strip about cavemen that blows off the theory of evolution."
May 1, 2005
The Mark Rothko Paint-by-Numbers Kit
From Bats Left Throws Right.
April 30, 2005
PostSecret
Florida Thirteen Year Old Argues For Right To Have Abortion
"Why can't I make my own decision?"
That was the blunt question to a judge from a pregnant 13-year-old girl ensnared in a Palm Beach County court fight over whether she can have an abortion.
"I don't know," Circuit Judge Ronald Alvarez replied, according to a recording of the closed hearing obtained Friday.
"You don't know?" replied the girl, who is a ward of the state. "Aren't you the judge?"
Against a backdrop of state and federal efforts to pass a parental notification law for teen abortions, the exchange was typical of L.G.'s pluck as she argued that she had the right and capability to make her own decision, despite a move by the Department of Children & Families to seek a judge's permission for her abortion.
"I think if I want to make the decision, it's my business and I can do that," she told the judge.
Read the full story here. Via Bitch. Ph.D.
Remixed New Yorker Cartoons
An alternative caption: "Pompous males in positions of authority, so probably not Heaven."
More here from Jay Pinkerton, via Crooked Timber.
April 29, 2005
Who Needs Photoshop?
Unedited pictures can be weird enough already. Via Rox Populi.
Friday Time Waster
Wal-Mart Barbie
By Carol Simpson.
Chewish Toys For Dogs And Cats
From JewishBazaar.com.
Craft Project!
April 28, 2005
Trudeau On DeLay
Today's Doonesbury is especially great.
April 27, 2005
Devils and Dust
I've been a hardcore Springsteen fan for decades now. Unlike a lot of people, I felt much gloom and forboding throughout the 2004 campaign season, in part a consequence of living in South Carolina perhaps. One of the few things that gave me a little optimism was when Bruce Springsteen endorsed John Kerry. Thinking about that still gives me hope. Check this out if you are interested.
Fafblog Interviews The Constitution!
Bush and Blair
Saw Lessig use this in a talk. It's called "Read My Lips."
The Tarot of Sneezing
Got a sneeze fetish? Pictures, movies, sound clips and stories of sneezes, separately listed by gender, here. I don't have a sneeze fetish myself but maybe you do? Here a few words from the site:
"What is a sneezing fetish? There are many different fetishes in this world. Some are shared by many, some have a small "following", some are more well-known than others. A sneezing fetish is simply a fetish for sneezing. And while there are many different definitions of the word fetish, the majority of people who have a sneezing fetish are ones who see sneezing as sexually pleasing. Most are aroused by seeing others sneeze, a few even by sneezing themselves. There are many, many aspects to a sneezing fetish but the bottom line is: sneezing is stimulating, and people have a fetish for it. "
"How did all this start? In the beginning, there was the sneeze, and it was good. No, really, none of us knows how the fetish started or when for that matter. But the first known public appearance of the fetish came on the internet. It was through Usenet postings that people with this common fetish acknowledged each other. A newsletter was created, webpages were formed, then came chat and forums. There have been a wide variety of different technological solutions brought to the online fetish, from webrings to Yahoo!groups. Assuredly, the fetish did not start with the internet, but it was this medium that brought many of us together for the first time into what is sometimes called a "Community".
Read Post. Laugh. Scroll Down.
A random office observation by Mimi Smartypants:
"...[S]omeone had left this post-it note on the copier, which was presumably instructions on the copying job:
1. MAKE COPIES
2. STAPLE COPIES
3. DISTRIBUTE COPIES
If that is a "note to self," I really fear for the note-writer. I mean, wow. If it's a note to some subordinate, I guess that someone has attended and graduated from Micromanagement By Post-It Note 101, and I find it really special that information like the number of copies does not need to be specified, but "distribute copies" (to whom?) does, and that the order of the steps was spelled out in a numbered list. OH SHIT WHAT NOW! I TRIED TO STAPLE THE COPIES BEFORE I MADE THE COPIES OW! MY HAND!"
April 26, 2005
Google Tries To Recruit More Women
Google video here, with lots of pretty colors. It will reassure you that if you gain weight, the "dreaded Google 15" from all the free food, they also have a gym so you can work it off. They also provide free deodorant, or maybe discounted deodorant, that part confused me a little, as did the sign about not stealing other people's underwear. Don't miss the conversation about shoes near the end. Via Misbehaving.net.
Air Freshener
Purchase here! Also check out the other varieties.
Cosmetic Gynecology
Sadly, this is not satire.
I'd Definitely Call on a Student With This Haircut...
...if I spotted it! From ismckenzie.com.
Andy Gets A Bath
Jeff Kay of the West Virginia Surf Report is headed to my fair state for a camping vacation, and reports on his preparations as follows:
"I gave our dog Andy a bath over the weekend. If he's going to be riding with us in a confined space all the way to South Carolina, then, by god, he needs to smell a little less doggy. Yeah, he thinks we're picking on him, but it's something that's expected of the whole family.
"Of course it's required by the dog union that he make a huge deal about this little twenty minute slice of his life. After he hears the water running in the tub upstairs, the site of past shampoo-based crimes, he has to shake like Hepburn out ice-fishing, hide under the dining room table, and slink around the house with his eyes darting here and there. To do otherwise would be a violation of his vows.
"And this time he added something new to his performance: he snapped at me. When I reached down to grab him, he gave me a little half-assed snarl and clacked his teeth together in the vicinity of my hand. He's pushing his luck with that crap. I'm the person who keeps him in spaghetti, after all. Do you think Toney would ever cook him up a special pasta supper, complete with breadstick? Ha! Now he's going to bite me? He goes down that road too often and I'll put his ass on eBay, and start the bidding at $15.
"I had a hell of a time getting him into the bathroom, because he was spreading his feet out in all directions to make it difficult to pass through doorways. And when we finally reached the bathroom proper, he made one last attempt to wriggle and shape-shift from my arms. At one point he was attempting to claw his way up the linen closet door. Next time I should probably wear a beekeeper suit, for personal protection. When he gets those Freddie Krueger claws to-goin' I imagine things could turn real bad real quick."
April 25, 2005
Video Will
Freeze!
The sub-tropical temperatures of South Carolina make me dubious about the efficacy of this product but dog owners in cooler climates might want to check it out. Can't imagine what would possess someone to subcribe to the product "newsletter," though.
Satire That Stings!
From Billmon at Whiskey Bar:
"A bill introduced Monday by Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Penn.) would prohibit the lungs of U.S. citizens from competing with companies such as Air Products Inc., which sell compressed oxygen to hospitals, clinics and other medical institutions. Under the proposed law, Americans would be required to purchase the air they breathe from a commercial vendor rather than inhaling it naturally from the earth's atmosphere.
"We believe this proposal will improve public health by ensuring the nation's lungs are exposed only to pure, 100% industrially manufactured oxygen," explained Mary Byers, executive vice president for Air Products, which just happens to be headquartered in Santorum's home state.
"The bill would also force the earth to devote its full attention to absorbing carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases, rather than duplicating products already available from the private sector, Byers added."
Weekly World News
Oxygen Makers Seek Ban on "Unfair" Competition
June 21, 2005
The Perry Bible Fellowship
A whole archive of similarly skewed "Perry Bible Fellowship" cartoon humor by Nicholas Gurewitch can be found here!
April 24, 2005
Remember Those "Undocumented" Kids Who Beat The MIT Students In a Robotics Contest ?
Bitch, Ph.D. has an update about them here.
More Mocking of Thomas Friedman
Because he so richly deserves it! Satire by The American Prospect here, excerpt below:
....
"What's my point? I don't actually have one--but opening my columns with strings of clichd cultural juxtapositions really cuts down my workload. You see, since the Cold War ended, we've gone from superpowers to spreadsheets, Pershings to Pentiums, the Berlin Wall to suburban sprawl, olive trees to Lexuses. Are you ready? Because the whole world is changing. Unless you are one of the eight-tenths of humanity who at this moment are either hungry, illiterate, or field-stripping an AK-47, in which case I'll get back to you in some future column."
"Nothing is local anymore. It's all global because the Internet makes everything local, which is the same as everything being global, because nothing has to be local when everything's global. Especially the local. For instance, I was talking to the guy who cleaned the toilets in my suite at the Bombay Hilton, and he told me, "If only I had a computer! You see, toilet-scrubbing in Bombay is really a local business, but with a laptop and a modem, I could maybe branch out into e-commerce services."" ....
The Man Who Should Have Been Pope
After 25 years 'St. Romero of the World' still inspires
By PAUL JEFFREY, in the National Catholic Reporter:
"His name is but one of many engraved in black marble at the edge of San Salvadors Cuscatln Park, part of a wall of memory constructed two years ago so as not to forget the violence that tore this land to pieces during the 1970s and 80s.
"Some 25,000 names are engraved here, all civilians murdered or disappeared between 1970 and 1991, arranged by year after terrible year. In the section of those killed in 1980, nestled amid the Rs, he is listed simply as Oscar Arnulfo Romero. No auspicious title, no little cross attached to his name to signify he was anything other than an ordinary Salvadoran. In his death se hizo pueblo, as they say here. He made himself part of the people, even if it meant dying alongside the poor who died violently every day.
"Yet in the months since the wall was built, the letters of his name have been so rubbed by the curious and the faithful that theyve taken on a different sheen from others nearby. Small paper notes tucked in a nearby crack carry the prayers of those who still turn to him for help. Twenty-five years after the elite of this Central American country thought they had rid themselves of Archbishop Romero, hes still around, making his presence felt more than ever.
"This years 25th anniversary commemoration of Archbishop Oscar Romeros assassination was clearly the largest remembrance of Romero ever held. More than two weeks of seminars, Masses, concerts and pilgrimages gave tens of thousands of Salvadorans -- and, according to church officials, at least 3,000 foreigners -- an opportunity to reflect on Romeros words and life, as well as his death on March 24, 1980, victim of a government-sanctioned death squad. Much of this years commemoration was delayed a week so as not to conflict with Holy Week, and culminated in an April 2 outdoor Mass. Cardinal Oscar Andrs Rodriguez, the archbishop of Tegucigalpa, Honduras, was supposed to give the homily. Instead, in the wake of the death of John Paul II, he took off for Rome, but sent his homily to be read by the papal nuncio."
Sitting The Naked Body
Interesting essay on nudity and gender here. Below is a brief excerpt:
"Restrictions in law on women's breast exposure stigmatize women for being women. Although there's no specific federal or provincial law forbidding women's exposed breasts, the municipal ordinances forbidding them apply also to girls with childhood breasts and women with removed breasts, but not to men with any size of breasts. This seems discrimination based solely on sex, contrary to Article 15 of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, and probably Article 28.
"Therefore, prohibition of women's uncovered breasts denies women body equality with men. That goes against main principles of liberal feminism. The prohibition also clashes with more radical feminist notions of women's difference. Women's breasts are a social, political, and judicial site of struggle for body authority. If women made the laws, they wouldn't likely criminalize exposure of their own breasts but not men's, regardless of gendered behaviours of desire."
Via Feministe.
Hip Hop Fo' Hebrews
"Matzah" by Jib Jab. Note: to access you must watch an annoying advertisement first.
Hokey-Pokey
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the ninth anniversary of the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed. Larry LaPrise, the man who claims to have written "The Hokey Pokey," died peacefully at age 93 on April 4, 1996. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.
Actually the real trouble was reportedly copyright related:
"LaPrise wrote the Hokey Pokey song in the late 1940s for the apres-ski crowd at a club in Sun Valley Idaho. The song was first recorded by his group the Ram Trio (with Charles Macak and Tafit Baker) in 1949. They were awarded US copyright in 1950. After the group broke up in the 1960s, LaPrise worked for the Post Office in Ketchum.
"The authorship of the Hokey-Pokey is disputed, with Jimmy Kennedy claiming to have written the original entitled Cokey-Cokey, or Hokey-Cokey, or Okey-Cokey during WWII. Robert Degan sued LaPrise for copyright infringement of his 1946 The Hokey-Pokey Dance. They settled out of court.
"Some scholars attribute the origin to the Shaker song Hinkum-Booby which had similar lyrics and was published in Edward Deming's A gift to be simple in 1940:
"I put my right hand in, I put my right hand out, I give my right hand a shake, And I turn it all about."
"The song was recorded as a novelty a couple of times but it didn't become a source of steady income for LaPrise until Roy Acuff bought the rights to it in the 60s.
"Alas, the Hokey Pokey turned out to be the high-water mark of LaPrise's musical careerin fact, the only water mark. LaPrise, by then a father of six, was working for the post office in Ketchum, Idaho.
"There followed a steady succession of recordings: Jack Johnson and the Hickory Dickory Singers, Warren Covington with the Tommy Dorsey Orchestra, Cliffie Stone, Jerry Marks, Chubby Checker, Annette Funicello, the Champs. In no time, the Hokey Pokey was everywhere. Other versions include, "Hokey Pokey Cow Bell Blues," "Hokey Pokey Mama," and "Hokey Pokey Polka."
"By the early 1990s, it had even turned up on a heavy metal album by the band Haunted Garage, alongside such classics as "Party in the Graveyard" and "Torture Dungeon".
"The Hokey Pokey' is like a square dance, really,'' LaPrise said in 1992. "You turn around. You shake it all about. Everyone is in a circle, and it gets them all involved.''
"The tune became the official victory dance for the Iowa State Football team. ''''I guarantee you we never had a big victory where we were the underdog or won a championship game or had a bowl victory that we didn't do the Hokey Pokey and celebrate,'' Coach Hayden Fry said. I would have sent him a note. I'm sure he never dreamed that he made a contribution in athletics.'''
"But the really shocking part is that the song may have been stolen.
Lexington, KY resident Bob Degen claims the folk song is his.
Degen, 90, owns a 1944 copyright for "The Hokey-Pokey Dance," and claims to have written the words and music. His copyright predates LaPrise's by six years.
"He's a faker," Degen said of LaPrise. In fact, Degen sued LaPrise in 1956 in U.S. District Court in California. According to Degen, the two parties settled out of court to split 40 percent of the royalties. Degen is adamant that he wrote the song without any influences. The truth, unusually, seems to lie not in between but without: Pure Invention is rare.
"A December 1945 issue of Dance magazine contains an article about an English novelty song called "the Okey Cokey," which American GIs were said to have danced to in England during WWII.
You put your left arm in.
You put your left arm out,
And shake it all about.
You do the okey-cokey
And you turn about.
And that's what it's all about."
"In his 1940 book, The Gift to be Simple, Edward Deming Andrews described a song called "The Hinkum-Booby" that was sung by Shakers in Kentucky:
"I put my right hand in,
I put my right hand out,
I give my right hand a shake,
And I turn it all about."
"So everybody in the copyright dispute was stealing from the great well of traditional folksong. As are all who try to be original with materials we hope will find resonance."
Penguins Going Through Airport Security
More photos, and commentary here, via Majikthise.
Oops
Listen to the MP3 here!
Abandoned Amusement Park
Today's Specials
Silly But Not Unamusing Star Wars Satire
Here.
April 22, 2005
The Philadelphia Art Museum
Photo by Lori at Avocado 8.
CNN spamming blogs?
According to Nick Lewis, CNN is trying to use blogs for an experimental guerrilla marketing campaign.
Rorschach Test
Does the water stain on the wall in the photo below look like the Virgin Mary to you?
Or does it look like a, um, flower?
Credit Digby at Hullabaloo.
April 21, 2005
Experts Solve Mystery of Unpopped Popcorn
By RICK CALLAHAN, Associated Press Writer:
"Eat your way to the bottom of almost any bag of popcorn and there they are: the rock-hard, jaw-rattling unpopped kernels known as old maids. The nuisance kernels have kept many a dentist busy, but their days could be numbered: Scientists say they now know why some popcorn kernels resist popping into puffy white globes.
"It's long been known that popcorn kernels must have a precise moisture level in their starchy center about 15 percent to explode. But Purdue University researchers found the key to a kernel's explosive success lies in the composition of its hull.
"It turns out there is an optimal hull structure that allows kernels to explode, and leaky hulls prevent the moisture pressure buildup needed for kernels to pop.
"They're sort of like little pressure vessels that explode when the pressure reaches a certain point," said Bruce Hamaker, a Purdue professor of food chemistry. "But if too much moisture escapes, it loses its ability to pop and just sits there."
"He and his associates compared the microwave popping performance of 14 Indiana-grown popcorn varieties and examined the crystalline structure of the translucent hulls of both the popped kernels and the duds.
"In the varieties popped, the percentage of unpopped kernels ranged from 4 percent in premium brands to 47 percent in the cheaper ones. The findings could be good news for people who savor the snack and those who grow the 17 billion quarts of popcorn sold each year in the United States.
"Wendy Boersema Rappel, a spokeswoman for the Chicago-based Popcorn Board, said popcorn processors are always looking for ways to improve their product, including reducing the number of old maids.
"It's one of life's annoyances it's not rocking anyone's world, but our members always like to improve their product," Rappel said. Hamaker said two popcorn manufacturers have already expressed interest in Purdue's findings. The research, funded by Purdue's Whistler Center for Carbohydrate Research, which Hamaker directs, has been published online and will appear in the July 11 edition of the journal BioMacromolecules."
April 20, 2005
The Scribbler
This is sort of fun. Via Pen-Elayne.
America's Worst Monthly?
Reader's Digest, a staple of doctors' offices everywhere, has published something it calls "America's 100 Best," supposedly featuring "the best this country has to offer," yet it couldn't seem to find one stinking "best" thing in all of South Carolina. I realize with competition like a Jell-O Art Show in Oregon, and Mrs. Meyer's Clean Day Pet Freshening Spray in Iowa our chances were bleak, but dang, y'all, we grow great peaches and have beautiful beaches!
April 19, 2005
The Frist Commandments
From Uggabugga.
Stoplight.com
Go! Use caution. Stop.
Right Wingnuts Blame "Female Soldiers" For Failure To Capture Bin Laden
You can read the whole thing here if you have the stomach for it. Below is the response from the wonderful Amanda Marcotte at Pandagon:
"I know. It seems ridiculous. But you see, it's widely believed that the terrorist-seeking radar the good Lord built into the human body is located in the penis, so as you can imagine, women are simply no good for looking for terrorists. In fact, even though a woman like me has seen bin Laden's face a million times on TV, I would not recognize him on the street without my penile terrorist sensors.
"And that's a fact, not some silly theory like evolution.
"There's only one thing to do, which is to pack up the female "warriors" and send them home, making sure to put enough into target range to be shot by American troops to give the Freepers plenty of fantasies about dead American women to crow about. Sure, there's the downside that stop-loss and other backdoor draft efforts will have to intensify, but if the men stationed in Iraq didn't want to be there, they were free to get a computer and join the 101st Fighting Keyboardists, weren't they?"
McSticker McRemix
Original
Remix
Many more at The Sneeze, via Uncle Horn Head. Maybe it is the nicotine withdrawal, but Uncle Horn Head finds funny stuff!
Clocky
"Clocky is a clock for people who have trouble getting out of bed. When the alarm clock goes off and the snooze button is pressed, Clocky will roll off the bedside table and wheel away, bumping mindlessly into objects on the floor until it eventually finds a spot to rest. Minutes later, when the alarm sounds again, the sleeper must get up out of bed and search for Clocky. This ensures that the person is fully awake before turning it off. Small wheels that are concealed by Clocky's shag enable it to move and reposition itself, and an internal processor helps it find a new hiding spot every day."
SCIgen - An Automatic CS Paper Generator
"SCIgen is a program that generates random Computer Science research papers, including graphs, figures, and citations. It uses a hand-written context-free grammar to form all elements of the papers. Our aim here is to maximize amusement, rather than coherence.
"One useful purpose for such a program is to auto-generate submissions to "fake" conferences; that is, conferences with no quality standards, which exist only to make money. A prime example, which you may recognize from spam in your inbox, is SCI/IIIS and its dozens of co-located conferences (for example, check out the gibberish on the WMSCI 2005 website). Using SCIgen to generate submissions for conferences like this gives us pleasure to no end. In fact, one of our papers was accepted to SCI 2005!"
Learn more here.
Museum of Hoaxes
Here, but is the site for real?
April 18, 2005
Where Some Women Bloggers Are
Remembering a Hero
April 17, 2005
Jesus Dress Up!
Yes I know this will annoy some people. Oh well.
Abstinence Only
This site, abstinenceonly.com is very funny but maybe not work safe. Via Feministe.
Gargoyle Troubles
People who do not live in neighborhoods like mine will doubt that this is for real. I have no independent knowledge about whether it is for real or not, but I am aware of a bitter pink plastic flamingo altercation on my very own street.
Effin' Deadwood
The West Virginia Surf Report counts the number of times the "f word" has been used in HBO's "Deadwood" series. I could say that the author of the West Virginia Surf Report has too much free time, but since I actually read and am now posting about his site, I can hardly throw stones in THAT direction. His name is (purportedly) Jeff Kay and here is his blog manifesto: "Holy crap in a Bundt pan... Due to the recent well-publicized shortage of amateur websites produced by assholes who consider themselves to be clever, I have been called into action. My name is Jeff, and Im an Ugly American living on the cusp of a mid-life crisis, near Scranton, PA. And Im here to serve, baby."
April 16, 2005
A Party With Satan
Read Ed Baker's Christian Decision Comic here. But not if you are overly sensitive or have trouble detecting or processing satire.
Scalia and Sex
So a lot has been written about the NYU law student who asked Justice Scalia whether he sodomized his wife, see e.g. The Leiter Reports. We could make certain deductions based on the fact that Scalia and his wife appear to have produced nine children:
1. He's not a virgin.
2. He's had "traditional" sex, as he seems to believe the framers of the U.S. Constitution intended, at least nine times.
I myself would rather not know what Scalia and his wife do to each other. I don't even like to think about what Scalia might look like, or have, or not have, under that robe. Which of course is the point, and it gets articulated pretty well here.
Funny Letters About Food
Card Trick
Fast hands or fast camera work? He didn't spend much on that magician's costume!
Sixty Years Ago Yesterday
The liberation of Bergen-Belsen happened April 15, 1945. Some really sobering video is available via the BBC here.
April 14, 2005
Once You Go Mac
White Lie Early Season(TM) Chardonnay
Excerpts from this press release:
"More than 60 percent of wine drinkers are female and women buy 80 percent of the wine sold in the U.S, yet the wine industry has largely ignored them," says Tracey Mason, who, as BBWEs Director of Innovation, spearheaded the project. "So our all-female team started with the question: What do women want?" Through research, the team discovered that an astounding 80 percent of women are dissatisfied with their appearance and that 45 percent are on a diet on any given day. And because of the increased demands of career and home, women have less time than ever for themselves or their friends. "That was our big Aha," says Mason. "We wanted women to feel better about themselves and their choices, realizing that often our desire to have it all means we have to give up something in return: that yummy dessert, the book weve been meaning to read, or just sharing a laugh with friends over a few glasses of wine. So, a wine that truly responded to todays savvy woman has to have more than just a pretty label -- it also has to be great tasting and come from a reputable winery."
"With this premise in mind, Masons innovation team, which included BBWE winemaker Jane Robichaud, developed a technique for making the wine that involved harvesting the grapes relatively early in the picking season when they have lower Brix (or sugar content). This technique, dubbed Early Season(TM), results in a wine that is low in alcohol, sugar, and calories. The team chose Chardonnay, the nations long-time number one seller among females, as its first varietal.
"The team also developed an innovative way of testing its new product among consumers. In lieu of the standard, sterile "focus group" set-up, Mason and her team led dinner parties in restaurants and homes, inviting females and their friends to try the wine in a more natural setting. "Our target doesnt have time for focus groups, and besides, discussing the wine in a more casual environment led to better insight and ultimately more valuable product validation," said Mason.
"BBWE plans a groundbreaking marketing campaign to support the launch of White Lie Early Season (TM) Chardonnay. "Innovation doesnt stop with product development," says Mason. "The name, White Lie, was developed, in conjunction with the Launch Point, a division of TracyLocke, as a kind of wink-wink to our consumer, telling her we understand you. It connects with females without being too girly, and its a light hearted and engaging way to communicate the low alcohol/low calorie benefit without splashing diet across the front label."
Gosh, if it's "Designed by and for Women" it must be good, right? So why do I feel like gagging?
Mark Fiore on Tom DeLay
Ginmar's "Apologia"
From A View From A Broad:
"Dear World:"
"I want to apologize for being a feminist. I know this has upset lots of people. I'm supposed to be a hobby feminist, I know, and I've been sort of stubborn about that. I'm only supposed to be the fun kind of feminist, the ones who say they're feminists, but do nothing but bitch about abortion because that's the only right they know anything about. I'm sorry I'm not the sort of feminist who talks about compromise and shit like that. I'm sorry that my attitude is, When we're equal, then we can compromise. Not until.
"I'm really sorry I've refused to tolerate fools and manipulative people. I know this has been upsetting. I especially want to apologize for making the belief in women's humanity the cornerstone of whether or not I believe somebody is truly liberal or progressive. You see, I really don't give a shit about your feelings about fossil fuel. I'm not fossil fuel, nor an inanimate object, and when people sigh that my lost rights are the price of their freedom, I think that's worth noting. And getting pissed off about. So let me apologize for that, too."
Unintentionally Suggestive Comic Book Covers
Here. Where do I find this stuff? My e-mail inbox; I blame my friends and relatives.
Teenagers Are Retarded: An Investigative Report
"One of the beefy kids in the back actually laughs at my generous offer to sell them discounted drugs. If this isn't proof of the gradual dumbing-down of America, I don't know what is apparently scoring cheap hash off your teacher isn't cool. Idiot."
Batman Origin Comic Remix
From JayPinkerton.com, via Pen-Elayne.
April 13, 2005
Slime-mold Beetles
From Dan Froomkin in the WaPo:
"The Cornell University News Service reports that Bush, Cheney and Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld each recently had a slime-mold beetle named in their honor.
"Two former Cornell University entomologists who recently had the job of naming 65 new species of slime-mold beetles named three species that are new to science in the genus Agathidium for members of the U.S. administration. They are A. bushi Miller and Wheeler, A. cheneyi Miller and Wheeler and A. rumsfeldi Miller and Wheeler."
"Quite the honor, indeed. Apparently the entomologists named some of the other beetles after an ex-wife and "Star Wars" villain Darth Vader."
Do Your Damn Taxes
Here. Might require IE browser (boo!).
Something Awfully Funny
Go here and read the exchanges between Rick Kyanka, who blogs at "Something Awful," and Chris Lewis, the Director of Communications for The Ultimate Warror (a former professional wrestler), who Kyanka describes as "the guy who picks up the phone when it rings and then turns it around the correct way so Mr. Ultimate Warrior is speaking into the correct end." Remember to click on the "next page" arrows, you don't want to miss an episode of this funny but somewhat alarming tale. Oh yeah, and there is an intellectual property leit motif too.
Here are some snippets:
Kyanka to Lewis:
"I look forward to your exciting lawsuit! I simply cannot wait to read the next exciting, action-filled update by Mr. Warrior detailing how the Internet is a vast liberal plot to destroy humanity and make the entire Earth blow up like a gigantic cake crammed full of homosexuals and foreigners. Both of you remind me how all political extremities, both far left and far right, embrace the exact same rhetoric. God bless America, the land of the lawsuit and the home of the offended. May you and your bicycle streamer-wearing boss both enjoy a successful libel / slander / intellectual copyright / insane washed up "pro" wrestler lawsuit against me. I have but one request: can "Mean" Gene Okerlund be present in the court when your boss testifies against me?"
Lewis to Kyanka:
"I'm pretty sure that after reading this, you're going to realize that you're only getting yourself deeper in trouble. I've already tracked down quite a bit of information about you.
For example, your address:
PO Box 997
Lees Summit, MO 64063
"Did you know that for only $1 someone can go to the post office, fill out a simple form, and find out the street address of the individual who rented the box?"
"I also know that your wife's name is Megan, and that you two were married on February 13, 2005. I've also tracked down a street address and telephone number for "another" Richard Kyanka. I actually called this telephone number. This was either you or your father. A terrible shame that you don't have the balls to claim your own name, little man. Speaking of little man, I've also managed to track down a couple of pictures of you, which I've attached to this email. You should really spend less time typing away at your computer and a little more time in the gym. Those arms of yours look like spaghetti. And those rosy-red cheeks of yours are quite manly, as well. Bottom line - if you're going to talk tough, you need to be prepared to back that up. To use the old (but in this case, appropriate) cliche, you're letting your mouth write checks that your body can't possibly cash."
Getting Perpendicular
April 12, 2005
Another Awful Newscaster
Really bad sportscasting, from Caffeine and Irony.
That 9/11 Video Re-Mixed
This re-mix of the "America We Stand As One" video has cuss words and a very different slant.
Here is the original.
April 11, 2005
Michael Berube on David Horowitz's Professor-Hating
Read the whole thing here, apologies to Berube for not putting the accents in his last name. Below is a tiny excerpt:
"Well, holy infant Jesus with a rattlesnake, folks what a shabby little stunt. First they refuse to publish my responses, and then they chastise me for not responding to them? What is going on over there at FrontPage are they smoking crack, or are they just giving up altogether? Did they think maybe I wouldnt notice that fifteen paragraphs of mine had somehow disappeared from the text of the debate? And did they forget that I have my own website, where I can call them out on this stuff for the benefit of the savviest readers on the Internet? Or maybe they were hoping I wouldnt keep my own copy of the exchange? I did, of course, and Ill reproduce it below so you all can see just how bad things have gotten with D. Ho & Co."
P.S.: Berube approvingly references Billmon's Whiskey Bar screed against the pie-ings and salad dressing-ings of conservatives, and both are correct, but let's not completely discount the possibility that the conservatives are staging these foodings themselves, as they seem to "relish" the publicity.
Andrea Dworkin
I haven't seen an obituary anywhere "official" yet, so here is an
article that appeared in the Guardian in 2001:
"It may well be time to face one of the stranger phenomena of contemporary feminist life. And it is this: despite all the requirements for feminist celebrity status, spelt out for us recently by Elaine Showalter in these pages - TV appearances, public buzz, a blitz of stories in the press - the ur-feminist icon, the real template, is a woman with none of the above. It is not Hillary Clinton or Oprah or Princess Diana. This woman is not a "celebrity" by the acknowledged standard. She is... Andrea Dworkin. More than any of the above, she matches Showalter's definition of feminist icon: someone on to whom a disproportionate amount of adulation and loathing is projected.
"Projected is the key word here. To the pornographers and the new female libertines, she is the symbol for man-hater, sex-hater, killjoy. The feminists who adore her and flock to her lectures sit so rapt it is tempting to use the word rapture (she is a brilliant, even mesmerising speaker). There is something quasi-religious about the divide between devoted followers and those who would brand her a heretic, pillorying her over and over, as though to reassure themselves that they have the power.
"Both sides have transformed a human being into a symbol. No other living person I can think of, who is so much out of the public eye, is so deeply entrenched in the public psyche as either heroine or demon."
These Are "For Real"
More Longmire Romance Novels
Basket Ball
Popapalooza 2005
Brackets here.
It Would Be Funnier If It Was Satire
From The American Street, photos via this site:
"Heads up, everyone! We Minnesotans, usually paragons of sensibility and progressive pragmatism, have a state legislator with national ambitions for you to keep an eye on. I moved from Pennsylvania shortly after Rick Santorum was elected, and this woman reminds me so much of Santorum that I dread a repeat. Shes anti-gay marriage, anti-evolution, and anti-abortion rights, and her latest crusade is to join with David Horowitz to strangle academic freedom.
"Shes a paragon of the dominant Lunatic Wing of the Republican Party. Not a nice lady at all. You may be wondering what this creature looks like, so that youll be better able to avoid her. [Shes the brown head on the left, skulking in the bushes in the top photo, and in the center in the second photo. She is not typically a "centrist"...]
"Shes on a fact-finding mission. We had a GLBT rally in St. Paul on Friday, and our courageous state senator, who is bent on protecting our liberty by restricting what consenting adults are allowed to do in private, had to see what them queers were up to. She was caught on camera monitoring a public rally, with a bodyguard to protect her (bald cranium, on the right). Unfortunately for their efforts, a photographer happened to notice the Republicans skulking in the shrubbery, and flushed them outthey had to flee to safety before the gay people noticed them and started looking at them with their gay eyes, exposing them to deadly gaydiation. Oh, the indignities the Minnesota Taliban must suffer in order to bring us salvation!"
Alternative Search Engines
Pupna, Yagoohoogle, and MSNSearchSpoof, all via Pen-Elayne.
The Man Who Would Be Blogger
April 10, 2005
The Unitarian Jihad
From Jon Carroll in the SF Chron:
"The following is the first communique from a group calling itself Unitarian Jihad. It was sent to me at The Chronicle via an anonymous spam remailer. I have no idea whether other news organizations have received this communique, and, if so, why they have not chosen to print it. Perhaps they fear starting a panic. I feel strongly that the truth, no matter how alarming, trivial or disgusting, must always be told. I am pleased to report that the words below are at least not disgusting:
"Greetings to the Imprisoned Citizens of the United States. We are Unitarian Jihad. There is only God, unless there is more than one God. The vote of our God subcommittee is 10-8 in favor of one God, with two abstentions. Brother Flaming Sword of Moderation noted the possibility of there being no God at all, and his objection was noted with love by the secretary.
"Greetings to the Imprisoned Citizens of the United States! Too long has your attention been waylaid by the bright baubles of extremist thought. Too long have fundamentalist yahoos of all religions (except Buddhism -- 14-5 vote, no abstentions, fundamentalism subcommittee) made your head hurt. Too long have you been buffeted by angry people who think that God talks to them. You have a right to your moderation! You have the power to be calm! We will use the IED of truth to explode the SUV of dogmatic expression!
"People of the United States, why is everyone yelling at you??? Whatever happened to ... you know, everything? Why is the news dominated by nutballs saying that the Ten Commandments have to be tattooed inside the eyelids of every American, or that Allah has told them to kill Americans in order to rid the world of Satan, or that Yahweh has instructed them to go live wherever they feel like, or that Shiva thinks bombing mosques is a great idea? Sister Immaculate Dagger of Peace notes for the record that we mean no disrespect to Jews, Muslims, Christians or Hindus. Referred back to the committee of the whole for further discussion.
"We are Unitarian Jihad. We are everywhere. We have not been born again, nor have we sworn a blood oath. We do not think that God cares what we read, what we eat or whom we sleep with. Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity notes for the record that he does not have a moral code but is nevertheless a good person, and Unexalted Leader Garrote of Forgiveness stipulates that Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity is a good person, and this is to be reflected in the minutes.
"Beware! Unless you people shut up and begin acting like grown-ups with brains enough to understand the difference between political belief and personal faith, the Unitarian Jihad will begin a series of terrorist-like actions. We will take over television studios, kidnap so-called commentators and broadcast calm, well-reasoned discussions of the issues of the day. We will not try for "balance" by hiring fruitcakes; we will try for balance by hiring non-ideologues who have carefully thought through the issues.
"We are Unitarian Jihad. We will appear in public places and require people to shake hands with each other. (Sister Hand Grenade of Love suggested that we institute a terror regime of mandatory hugging, but her motion was not formally introduced because of lack of a quorum.) We will require all lobbyists, spokesmen and campaign managers to dress like trout in public. Televangelists will be forced to take jobs as Xerox repair specialists. Demagogues of all stripes will be required to read Proust out loud in prisons.
"We are Unitarian Jihad, and our motto is: "Sincerity is not enough." We have heard from enough sincere people to last a lifetime already. Just because you believe it's true doesn't make it true. Just because your motives are pure doesn't mean you are not doing harm. Get a dog, or comfort someone in a nursing home, or just feed the birds in the park. Play basketball. Lighten up. The world is not out to get you, except in the sense that the world is out to get everyone.
"Brother Gatling Gun of Patience notes that he's pretty sure the world is out to get him because everyone laughs when he says he is a Unitarian. There were murmurs of assent around the room, and someone suggested that we buy some Congress members and really stick it to the Baptists. But this was deemed against Revolutionary Principles, and Brother Gatling Gun of Patience was remanded to the Sunday Flowers and Banners committee.
"People of the United States! We are Unitarian Jihad! We can strike without warning. Pockets of reasonableness and harmony will appear as if from nowhere! Nice people will run the government again! There will be coffee and cookies in the Gandhi Room after the revolution."
Invoking 911
Do you find this video patriotic and inspiring, or tawdry and exploitive?
April 6, 2005
Pillow I'm Buying
From here!
Naming the Next Pope
"During the first five hundred years of its existence, the Church had Fifty-four Popes. All of them except two (Liberius, 352-66 and Anastasius II, 496-98) have been made saints. Imagine how awful that must feel for them. Prior to John-Paul, the last time someone introduced a new name into the sequence was Pope Lando in 913. As a Babylon 5 fan, I could go for Pope Lando II."
"Most of the early Popes have, for obvious reasons, very Roman names. Most of these early Roman Popes' names have never been reused. Here's a few of my favorites:
* Hilarius - (last used 461-68) Isn't that a happy sounding name? Wouldn't you want to watch a Hilarius news conference?
* Hyginus - (136-140) Because cleanliness is next to Godliness.
* Simplicius - (468-83) This was the successor to Hilarius. Those sound like pleasant times (unless you know anything about Roman history).
* Zephyrinus - (199-217) Maybe not; he sounds like an old wind-bag.
* Vitalian - (657-72) Has the added benefit of sounding like a cure for baldness or impotence.
What about completely new names? Here are a few possibilities:
* George-Ringo - for symmetrys sake and just because.
* Henry - Look at it as an ecumenical outreach to the Anglicans.
* Spike or Butch - Something tough to let the world know this is not a Pope to be trifled with.
* He could follow the American tradition of familiarity and go for something like Pope Chuck.
* Since the bishop of Nigeria is considered to be in the running, maybe we could have something traditionally African and completely unpronounceable to western newscasters."
April 5, 2005
The Scents of Spring
Spring starts early here in South Carolina. One omnipresent plant I don't understand the local interest in is the Bradford Pear, pictured above. It doesn't actually bear fruit, its leaves and branches aren't particularly attractive, and its blossoms smell like rotting fish. I'm not even sure how it gets pollinated - don't bees have noses? This site calls it "beautiful" but note that the web page is maintained by Clemson, the blooming idiots.
Virtual Spring
Go here, click on one of the flower links, and watch it bloom. The Passion Flower, Morning Glory and Narcisus are especially cool.
Yikes!
Today's post at The Rude Pundit starts out:
"The Rude Pundit wishes he could attend the hatefest this week in D.C. called "Confronting the Judicial War on Faith." How he wishes he had the time and expense account and remaining stomach lining to check into the Georgetown Holiday Inn and party it up with all the white people who'll be there, all the tight-assed male scolds who all seem to have the same oh-so-hot-but-untouchable young female assistant/secretary. Sweet mercy, he wishes he could have drinks at the Marriott bar, using lines like "I have a gavel in my pants and if you can find it, I'll rule you out of order," or "Wanna come up to my room and obey my ten commandments?" or "Suck my habeas corpus" to get one or two or three of 'em to come back to the Rude Pundit's room at the Georgetown Holiday Inn."
And that's the nice part! And when you recover from that, scroll down and read "Pope Corpse." Yowza.
Hooray for Connie Schultz!
This Doesn't Seem Right
April 4, 2005
Infograph from The Onion
Completely supercopied from The Onion, where there is lots more funny satirical stuff, and also personal ads which, it turns out, are for real, whoops.
A Citizen Journalism Breakthrough in South Carolina?
It's the Bluffton Today site and newspaper, which asserts:
"This is a new kind of community website that joins with the Bluffton Today newspaper in a mission of helping Bluffton come together as a community.
"With your help, we will provide a friendly, safe, easy to use place on the Web for everyone in Bluffton to post news items, create a unified community calendar, and share photos, recipes, opinions.
"This is a place where you take the lead in telling your own story. As a registered BlufftonToday.com user, you get your own weblog, your own photo gallery, and the ability to post entries in special databases such as events and recipes.
"In return, we ask that you meet this character challenge: be a good citizen and exhibit community leadership qualities. It's a simple and golden rule. Act as you would like your neighbors to act."
Posted about by Dan Gillmor on Grassroots Journalism who misstates the name of the town as "Buffton" - was it all those lifeguard photos at the site that confused him? Thanks to Michael Madison for bringing this to my attention.
La Vida Robot
Here is a Wired.com article about a group of high school kids from Phoenix, the children of migrant workers, who beat a bunch of college kids, including a team from MIT, in an underwater robot engineering competition. Because they are undocumented, they are ineligible for financial aid, or even "in-state tuition" rates at the Arizona public universities, so the contest winners are currently unable to enroll in college themselves.
April 3, 2005
The Secret of Bananas
Street Signs
From Chaos Theory via Feministe. I sort of understand the first one, but the others have me mystified.
Fighting the Tyranny of Breath Right
From Creepo.net, where you can see photos and read the whole thing if you scroll down:
"One man's mission to fight back against the incredibly inflated cost of Breathe Right nasal strips.
"So four or five years ago my step-dad told me about these things he had found to help him breathe better at night. So I tried them. Breathe Right Nasal Strips. And for some reason, they work for me. I think my nostrils are malformed. Even during a normal day, it's not unusual for me to be limited to one clear nostril... and if both are functioning, it's limited... constrained.
"I used to buy them all the time and not think about the cost. Then, after the baby, we both gave up some luxuries to cut corners and make sure one of us could be at home with the baby rather than pay for daycare and both work. We have succeeded in that goal, but I miss my nosestrips. Every now and then I'd pick up a 12 pack - or even a 30 pack if we were having a rich month... but it pissed me off that a piece of sticky plastic cost that much..."
"One day I googled for "make your own nose strips" and found nothing. Then I started to think - shit, it's a piece of plastic and some tape... I didn't do anything about it right away. But a couple weeks of gestation and one day I formulated my plan."
"My wife joked... if we graphed it, my love life would be inversely proportional to the use of my solution. OK, so I haven't worked at all on the aesthetics of the thing, but it WORKS! It's a big piece of tape on my face. If you, like me, want to stick it to the Breathe Right man, and you don't mind looking like an idiot, here's the solution: Instructions for Jim's Cheap-Ass Home Made Breathe Right Nose Strips."
I Don't Knit...
But if I did knit, I'd read this blog and all the blogs it links to.
Astronomy Humor
Water on Mars - Take that, creationists!
April 2, 2005
John, Paul, George, Ringo, Mike, Mickey, Davey and Peter
In "Paperback Believer", via A Moveable Beast.
It's Time!
Check out the Human Clock, via Brutal Women.
Now that The Gamecocks' Season is Over...
Go Fightin' Whites!
EVERY THANGS GONNA BE ALL WHITE
The Fighting Whites' Mission Statement:
"The Fighting Whites basketball team was organized in early February (2002) by a group of Native American and non-Indian students of the University of Northern Colorado with the intent of playing intramural basketball. We came up with the "Fighting Whites" logo and slogan to have a little satirical fun and to deliver a simple, sincere, message about ethnic stereotyping. Since March 6, when our campus newspaper first reported on the "Fighting Whites," we have been launched into the national spotlight, propelled by a national debate over stereotyping American Indians in sports symbolism."
See also: Michael Berube's post about Chief Illiniwek.
Applause!
This is great. Via Pen-Elayne.
Demotivational Posters
Wonder Where Siva Is Today?
Read this.
Microsoft Crash Message Gallery
Why anyone would compile a gallery of these horrors is beyond me, but by gosh someone did. I find the one above particularly galling, I mean really, an ILLEGAL operation? A more truthful message would state, "Oops, another idiotic programming glitch! Bet you wish you ran Linux!"
Plug 'N Pray
Pope Soap on a Rope
Here's hoping the next Pope creates a fresh, clean, sudsy, rinseable lather, and doesn't provoke itchy rashes or generate any soap scum.
Great Lecture Hall Prank
No pies, just funny, (may take a while to load), via Uncle Horn Head.
Pikachu? Gesundheit.
From VGCats.
TBogg's Pope Picks
Read them all here!
"Now, as a lapsed Catholic (and by "lapsed" I mean one who now thinks that the whole Catholic thing is as bogus as a Tom DeLay prayer) I thought I would make some Pope nomination suggestions that might help the Catholic church rebuild its thinning ranks. That way if I'm wrong about that whole eternity thing being bullshit, well, I'll have a bargaining chip that may keep me out of Hell and only condemn me to Indiana."
"So here you go, you sons of Bishops. You can thank me later:
Mel Gibson: He's somewhere between the Pope and Jesus already.
Antonin Scalia: Sure it would be a step down but he's already got that "infallibility" thing down cold.
Conan O'Brien: Very popular with the kids and the Irish.
Joel Mowbray: You want a Pope who's cool? I gotcher cool right here.
Alan Keyes: Guaranteed to get more votes for Pope than he did for Senator from Illinois.
P. Diddy: Already has his own Pope clothes and he used to date J-Lo so he has more than a passing acquaintance with Hell.
Ben Shapiro: Because the church always has room for one more virgin. Besides, Jesus was a Jew.
Michael Jackson: Will make people forget about priest pedophilia probl- Okay. Scratch this one.
50 Cent: Big cross? Check. Been shot? Check. He's got "Pope" written all over him. I think on his lower back."
None of his picks are getting very good odds here!
Blogging The Shark
From Michelle Maklin!
April 1, 2005
SC Gamecocks Win NIT Championship!
Woo-hoo! Story here!
March 31, 2005
Stuck in Rehab With Pat O'Brien
This is a very funny blog. Here is a re-post of just one entry:
"I'm not a drug counselor or anything, but I don't think Pat O'Brien is making much progress in group. He's been resistant to opening up and taking ownership of his addiction. Instead he keeps blaming it on the Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards break-up."
"They were so beautiful together," he said. "What person wouldn't resort to coke, and crystal meth, and Oxycontin, and H-Bombs, and horse tranquilizers, and Robitussin after seeing something that beautiful die?"
"Sheryl Anne is losing patience with him. She bites her lip and lets out a small sigh every time he makes another excuse. She's easily the sexiest drug counselor I've ever had."
"I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. Wait, am I falling in love with her? No, I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her. I'm not falling in love with her."
"At the end of group, Pat O'Brien asked everyone to "huddle up" for a group hug. "Tony," "Debbie," and "Warren" managed to pass off like they didn't hear him, but "Flo" and I were cornered and couldn't say no."
"The hug was hours ago and I've showered three times since, but I still smell like Brut and monkey assistant."
March 30, 2005
Website Devoted to Orange Peel Carvings
Jeu d'oranges, via Pen-Elayne.
Last Easter Post of 2005, Probably
March 29, 2005
Superman Re-Drawn!
Still More Peeps
March 28, 2005
Jesus Saves!
"For some of us, it would take a miracle to get us to save money. And perhaps that miracle has arrived with the Jesus Saves Bank."
"Really, how could you NOT put a few coins in this beatific bank? Jesus said, "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God," but he never said anything about people with pocket change."
"Though it's only made from hard rubber, your money is safe here. What thief would dare steal a bank shaped like a praying Jesus? More likely, he'll drop in a few coins of his own, beg forgiveness, and be on his way."
Lord of the Peeps
March 27, 2005
The Anapeeparchist In The Library
Quite A Concept
Christian 'Conception' Parties Raise Ire, Eyebrows
"Thousands of Christian couples plan to celebrate the occasion of their savior's creation by attending 'conception parties' tonight, intimate gatherings where the conception of the world's most famous baby is lovingly reenacted. Fans of the pro-life parties say that theirs is a way of livening up the culture of life. But some Christians say that they're uncomfortable celebrating the pregnancy of a teenage girl, even if the father was a heavenly one."
More at The Swift Report.
March 26, 2005
Flower Communion
May the blessing of the flowers be upon you.
May their beauty beckon to you each morning
And their loveliness lure you each day,
And their tenderness caress you each night.
May their delicate petals make you gentle,
And their eyes make you aware.
May their stems make you sturdy,
And their reaching make you care.
Wishing Fellow Unitarian Universalists a Joyous Flower Communion:
"The Flower communion service was created by Norbert Capek (1870- 1942), who founded the Unitarian Church in Czechoslovakia. He introduced this special service to that church on June 4, 1923. For some time he had felt the need for some symbolic ritual that would bind people more closely together. The format had to be one that would not alienate any who had forsaken other religious traditions. The traditional Christian communion service with bread and wine was unacceptable to the members of his congregation because of their strong reaction against the Catholic faith. So he turned to the native beauty of their countryside for elements of a communion which would be genuine to them. This simple service was the result. It was such a success that it was held yearly just before the summer recess of the church....
"When the Nazis took control of Prague in 1940, they found Dr. Capek's gospel of the inherent worth and beauty of every human person to be-as Nazi court records show-- "...too dangerous to the Reich [for him] to be allowed to live." Dr. Capek was sent to Dachau, where he was killed the next year during a Nazi "medical experiment." This gentle man suffered a cruel death, but his message of human hope and decency lives on through his Flower Communion, which is widely celebrated today. It is a noble and meaning-filled ritual we recreate. This service includes the original prayers of Dr. Capek to help us remember the principles and dreams for which he died.
"The significance of the flower communion is that as no two flowers are alike, so no two people are alike, yet each has a contribution to make. Together the different flowers form a beautiful bouquet. Our common bouquet would not be the same without the unique addition of each individual flower, and thus it is with our church community, it would not be the same without each and every one of us. Thus this service is a statement of our community.
"By exchanging flowers, we show our willingness to walk together in our search for truth, disregarding all that might divide us. Each person takes home a flower brought by someone else - thus symbolizing our shared celebration in community. This communion of sharing is essential to a free people of a free religion."
Good Tidings Of The Day
Chocolatey Christian Goodness
Where Are The Women?
"In recent weeks, criticism of the shortage of women's bylines on newspaper op-ed pages has roiled the media waters, prompted by syndicated columnist Susan Estrich's attack on Los Angeles Times op-ed page editor Michael Kinsley for his failure to bring more women onto the Times' op-ed page.
"This issue certainly deserves discussion, but the problem extends beyond newspaper op-ed pages and into television. An upcoming FAIR study has found that on television, as in print, female pundits are in short supply.
"FAIR looked at Sunday morning talkshow panels, where two to four journalists (political reporters as well as columnists) often join the shows' hosts to discuss the week's big political stories. The study examined six months (9/1/04-2/28/05) of NBC's Chris Matthews Show and Meet the Press, ABC's This Week and Fox News Sunday. (CBS had no consistent panel feature on analogous shows.)
"Surprisingly, NBC's Chris Matthews Show came out almost exactly even on gender, with 51 men and 49 women. Unfortunately, the show is unique in its gender balance: This Week and Fox News Sunday hewed more closely to the print media's unspoken "quota of one" for female pundits, featuring 22 percent and 25 percent women respectively. Meet the Presswhich occasionally included more than one woman per panel and once (2/20/05) even filled its panel with fourhad 39 percent women.
"All of the program hosts, who direct the discussions, are white men: NBC's Chris Matthews and Tim Russert, ABC's George Stephanopoulos and Fox's Chris Wallace.
"But which women get to speak? Certainly not women of color. While the Chris Matthews Show did well on gender parity, every one of its 49 female panelists was white. The only two appearances by non-white women in the six months studied were PBS's Gwen Ifill (Meet the Press, 10/24/04) and Democratic strategist Donna Brazile (This Week, 2/27/05). And Brazile falls into a somewhat different categoryunlike the other shows, This Week's pundit roundtable sometimes includes newsmakers like her in addition to journalists."
Magnetic Ribbons
How to Talk to Men
At Pandagon, where she is now blogging permanently, Amanda Marcotte reviews a Cosmo column about how to communicate with men. Her post starts out as follows:
From torturing myself with the annals of Cosmo, one thing I have learned very well is that men cannot be approached directly with a question or they will burst into flames, or at best, run away and hide under the bramble bushes. Thank god Cosmo is here to help us mere women read the minds of our men and stop torturing ourselves wondering things like, "Why is he on the ground clutching his ankle and screaming? Does it have anything to do with tripping over that tree branch? Oh, I wish I could ask him!"
Here is one of my favorite parts:
Actually, for severe phobias, and frankly any man who suffers from fear of Woman Talking has an irrational phobia brought on by reading too much Mens News Daily, heavy exposure is the best cure. So just say, "We need to talk" and "Can I ask you something" before every single thing you say until he calms the fuck down. Example: "Can we talk? Can I have the remote?" or "We need to talk. I want spaghetti for dinner." Then, I suppose if you ever do have something important to say, don't introduce it. Just bust out over dinner one night, "I'm pregnant and leaving you for Tim. He doesn't scurry away every time I want to ask him something."
But go and read the whole thing! Amanda is one of the best feminist bloggers anywhere.
March 25, 2005
Go Gamecocks!
The South Carolina Gamecocks beat Georgetown last night here in Columbia, 69-66, and will be going to NYC for the NIT Semifinals, full story here. Though as a matter of policy I am not a fan of collegiate sports as generally constituted, I like watching the Gamecocks play, and am very pleased for the team. I've especially enjoyed watching one team member, Carlos Powell (pictured above) develop as a player over the years. In addition to great skills, he has a warm and engaging presence that can even be felt in the nosebleed section of the basketball stadium where I usually sit. He is graduating this year, and will be greatly misssed. Go Gamecocks!
Creative Commons Yahoo Search Engine!
Here! Per Larry Lessig:
"Late last night, Yahoo! launched a Creative Commons search engine, permitting you to search the web, filtering results on the basis of Creative Commons licenses. So, as I feel like I've said 10,000 times when explaining CC on the road, "Show me pictures of the Empire State Building that I can use for noncommercial use," and this is the first of about 13,000 on the list.
"This is exciting news for us. It confirms great news about Yahoo!. I met their senior management last October. They had, imho, precisely the right vision of a future net. Not a platform for delivering whatever, but instead a platform for communities to develop. With the acquisition of Flickr, the step into blogging and now this tool to locate the welcome mats spread across the net, that vision begins to turn real. "
Torture Not Effective
Well, duh. It's also "wrong" but figuring that out is apparently still going to take a while. Excerpt below, full article here.
Tough tactics don't help interrogations: Guantanamo prison info not any better
March 22, 2005, BY JONATHAN S. LANDAY, DETROIT FREE PRESS
"Harsh techniques used by military interrogators on prisoners at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, produced no better information than traditional law-enforcement methods, FBI agents told their superiors in newly declassified portions of e-mails released Monday.
"FBI agents assigned to the detention center raised their concerns over the military's interrogation methods with senior commanders and civilian Pentagon officials, but were rebuffed, according to one of the excerpts.
"In one of the e-mails, an unidentified FBI agent said "conversations got somewhat heated" when he told senior military commanders and Pentagon officials that the information produced by the military's interrogations "was nothing more than what the FBI got using simple investigative techniques.""
March 24, 2005
The Passion of the Peeps
More Peeps dioramas here.
Spud's Travels
Mr. Potato Head gets around.
Here he is in Gaffney, South Carolina!
"Freedom is a Dangerous Thing..."
Capitol bill aims to control leftist profs
THE LAW COULD LET STUDENTS SUE FOR UNTOLERATED BELIEFS.
By JAMES VANLANDINGHAM, Alligator Staff Writer, via Crooked Timber:
TALLAHASSEE Republicans on the House Choice and Innovation Committee voted along party lines Tuesday to pass a bill that aims to stamp out leftist totalitarianism by dictator professors in the classrooms of Floridas universities.
The Academic Freedom Bill of Rights, sponsored by Rep. Dennis Baxley, R-Ocala, passed 8-to-2 despite strenuous objections from the only two Democrats on the committee.
The bill has two more committees to pass before it can be considered by the full House.
While promoting the bill Tuesday, Baxley said a university education should be more than one biased view by the professor, who as a dictator controls the classroom, as part of a misuse of their platform to indoctrinate the next generation with their own views.
The bill sets a statewide standard that students cannot be punished for professing beliefs with which their professors disagree. Professors would also be advised to teach alternative serious academic theories that may disagree with their personal views.
According to a legislative staff analysis of the bill, the law would give students who think their beliefs are not being respected legal standing to sue professors and universities.
Students who believe their professor is singling them out for public ridicule for instance, when professors use the Socratic method to force students to explain their theories in class would also be given the right to sue.
Some professors say, Evolution is a fact. I dont want to hear about Intelligent Design (a creationist theory), and if you dont like it, theres the door, Baxley said, citing one example when he thought a student should sue.
Rep. Dan Gelber, D-Miami Beach, warned of lawsuits from students enrolled in Holocaust history courses who believe the Holocaust never happened.
Similar suits could be filed by students who dont believe astronauts landed on the moon, who believe teaching birth control is a sin or even by Shands medical students who refuse to perform blood transfusions and believe prayer is the only way to heal the body, Gelber added.
This is a horrible step, he said. Universities will have to hire lawyers so our curricula can be decided by judges in courtrooms. Professors might have to pay court costs even if they win from their own pockets. This is not an innocent piece of legislation.
The staff analysis also warned the bill may shift responsibility for determining whether a students freedom has been infringed from the faculty to the courts.
But Baxley brushed off Gelbers concerns. Freedom is a dangerous thing, and you might be exposed to things you dont want to hear, he said. Being a businessman, I found out you can be sued for anything. Besides, if students are being persecuted and ridiculed for their beliefs, I think they should be given standing to sue.
March 23, 2005
Virgin Mary Whoopee Cushion
Bid on it here.
Driving With Dignity
Commentary by Peggy at A Moveable Beast:
"An hour or so ago I drove into our wee town for some of the usual essential supplies, (bread, milk, milk of magnesia, hand guns, bullets, bibles, the TV guide, crystal meth, lipstick, cough lozenges, seedless grapes, and masking tape), when I had to arrest myself on the drive home for a DWI- Driving While Irritated. Why? Because I'd turned the radio on to Rush Limbaugh, who was of course talking about Terri Schiavo and said, "Why do some of you people want her to die?" I yelled and cussed out loud, but luckily did not swerve.
"Nobody made me tune in to fathead's program; I did it to myself! And for that I have revoked my driver's license and placed myself under house arrest until tomorrow."
Bobble Head Jesus
"Divine plastic Jesus nodder, dressed in white toga with brown mantle, he nods his blessing all day long. Especially effective on the dashboard." From Miss Poppy.com. I hope she's getting rich!
Easter Gift From Miss Poppy!
"Hail Mary, full of grace, please give me another ace!"
"Learn Catholic doctrine AND improve your poker game. Rumored to be the same cards William Bennett plays poker with!"
Full-sized regulation deck, sealed. "Appeals to family members of any age."
Buy here.
March 22, 2005
Democracy 2.0 With B.S. Blocker
Funny "Slowpoke" cartoon about web browsers here.
Creative Photo Manipulations
Check out this site, be glad that you are not the women dancing in the original photo, and scroll down to see all the fun that was had at her expense!
March 21, 2005
Ending the Blastocyst-American Holocaust
From Jesus' General, here is an excerpt:
"I can't understand why anyone would be upset with you for comparing stem cell research to the Holocaust. It makes perfect sense to me. Especially considering the cost in lives. While only ten million people were systematically executed during the Holocaust, medical research centers have ripped billions of stem cells from the protoplasm of Blastocyst-Americans."
Guckert, Gannon, whatever...
Excerpt from an interview of "Jeff Gannon" by Deborah Solomon, published in the NYT Magazine:
DS: Scott McClellan, the press secretary to President Bush, called on you and allowed you to ask questions on a nearly daily basis. What, exactly, is your relationship with him?
JG: I was just another guy in the press room. Did I try to curry favor with him? Sure. When he got married, I left a wedding card for him in the press office. People are saying this proves there is some link. But as Einstein said, "Sometimes a wedding card is just a wedding card.''
DS: You mean like "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar''? That wasn't Einstein. That was Freud.
JG: Oh, Freud. O.K. I got my old Jewish men confused.
DS: You should learn the difference between them if you want to work in journalism.
More Airport Security Nonsense
From Cosmic Iguana via Discourse.net:
Stereophonics' singer Kelly Jones sparked an airport security alert last week when boarding a flight out of Londons Heathrow Airport for wearing a t-shirt with the print of a gun. According to reports Kelly was about to board the flight when he found himself questioned after repeatedly setting off the metal detector, he was then hassled by a security guard for his t-shirt who claimed it would prevent him from flying at all.
"I beeped as I went through the metal detector", Jones is quoted by website Contact Music as saying, "So they took my belt, watch and phone off.
"The guy takes me aside and says, 'You know you're not supposed to wear that.' I said, 'Not supposed to wear what?' I honestly didn't have a clue."
A security man then pointed to the singer's T-shirt - which featured a picture of a pistol with a flame coming out of the top.
"I was like, 'What am I going to do with a gun on a T-shirt?'"
Well, clearly he was going to highjack a picture of an airplane!
March 20, 2005
Bohemian Rhapsody Parody
If you are a fan of the Queen song "Bohemian Rhapsody," this will make you laugh.
March 19, 2005
Bagpipes, the Tartan Menace
According to this site:
*Bagpipes are played by repeatedly spitting down the neck. They fill up rapidly and there is a serious possibility that they might burst and cover the surrounding crowd in phlegm.
* Most bagpipes enter the country illegally. This means that they have not been quarantined or given the necessary vaccinations. As a result, many of them are carriers of serious diseases, like whooping cough, scrofula and rabies.
* A set of bagpipes can hold enough oxygen to allow its owner to remain submerged for up to eight hours. Pipers in the English Channel frequently harass marine life and are a constant danger to shipping.
* Many bagpipers eat babies when they think no one is looking.
March 16, 2005
Out of Sorts Sports Jerseys
Farwell Snow Cap
From The Guardian, via Billmon:
The peak of Mt Kilimanjaro as it has not been seen for 11,000 years
"Africa's tallest mountain, with its white peak, is one of the most instantly recognisable sights in the world. But as this aerial photograph shows, Kilimanjaro's trademark snowy cap, at 5,895 metres (1,934ft), is now all but gone - 15 years beforescientists predicted it would melt through global warming, writes Paul Brown.
"In Swahili Kilima Njaro means shining mountain, but the glaciers and snow cap that kept the summit white, probably for 11,000 years - despite the location, in Tanzania, 200 miles south of the equator - have almost disappeared.
"Tomorrow the 34 ministers at the G8 energy and environment summit, meeting in London, will receive a book - published by The Climate Group, and entitled Northsoutheastwest: a 360 view of climate change - that includes this picture among others depicting global warming. The book's text describes the devastating speed of climate change documented by 10 of the world's top photographers from Magnum Photos."
Public Mourning in Italy
This is the front page of an Italian newspaper, posted at Body & Soul with the following commentary:
"I can't remember ever seeing the face of an American soldier killed in Iraq on the front of a major American paper. Only when it's a local story.
"I'm impressed with a country that considers the death of a soldier to be the most important news of the day.
"There have been 28 Italian deaths in Iraq, 17 of them soldiers. That seems like a small number compared to American deaths, but if we paid this much attention to each of our losses, if our major papers lead with each of our deaths, if we had been forced to look into their eyes every time, so that we had to think about whether this war was worth what they had given up for it, I wonder if we wouldn't be planning to leave in September, too."
March 15, 2005
Baby Bottle
Kitchen Knife Holder
Avery For Pope
Avery for Pope: Missionary Statement
"My goal is to be the best damned Pope there ever was. I want to bring the fun, mental, and dog back to fundamentalist dogma. I want everyone to see that theres more to Catholicism than firing a heretic out of a canonization. I want to make Vaticant City the biggest non-stop 24/7 party scene on Gods glorious and most excellent earth. I want to convert the heathens and pagans or at least dance naked with them. I want to spread Gods word like I spread Hellmanns Mayonnaise on Wonder Bread. I want to wear the hat and funky robes. And much like the lyrics from that old Cheap Trick song, I want you to want me.
"Oh, and Im also currently unemployed and could use the work."
Milton Glaser
This takes a long time to load, but it is worth it if you find graphic design interesting.
Astor Place Cubism
Old Cube
Temporary Replacement
Story here.
Thirsty?
Access here.
March 14, 2005
Bathrooms
I attended the Annual Meeting of the Association for Study of Law, Culture and the Humanities this past weekend, and particularly enjoyed a presentation by Prof. Mary Anne Case of the U of Chicago Law School entitled: "On Not Having the Opportunity to Introduce Myself to John Kerry in the Men's Room." She talked about rest rooms as gendered spaces, and some of the social implications of gender segregation in this context in a very interesting way.
Recently Prof. Ian Ayres of the Yale Law School published an article about the legality of single sex, single toilet bathrooms at Slate.com. He blogged about this at Balkinization and got comments suggesting that some people find this topic rather mundane.
Well, I think both Case and Ayres are right on. When the building housing the University of South Carolina School of Law was finished in 1973 it never occurred to anyone there would ever be female faculty members who might need to routinely pee (Southern women being esteemed for their large bladders and ability to pretend to rise above bodily functions), so the faculty office floors got solitary "faculty" bathrooms, with urinals and stalls and every indicia of a comfortable bathroom, and yes I have been in them, you don't need to know when or why. Those are now the "Men's Rooms." I suppose the fact that there was one bathroom for men of both races was somewhat of a triumph, given that we didn't start graduating African American law students until about 1973, but the architects clearly didn't plan for female faculty.
Tiny ventilationless bathrooms were installed for the support staff, and that is what the female faculty has to use to this day (as do the female support staff members). It may seem like no big deal, but I drink a lot of water. I get tired of having to re-duct tape closed the toilet paper dispenser, which has fallen open and whacked me on the shoulder on more than one occasion, and makes me doubt the usefulness of duct tape in the event of a terrorist attack. Also, I don't enjoy running a gauntlet of students and knapsacks to simply access the bathroom, which is partially blocked by the only two chairs on the entire floor in which students can sit to wait to talk to faculty members. Complaints about this by me and other fluid processing females reduced the chair number from three to two, but supposedly there is no place else for them to be located, outside the Men's Room being out of the question. My male colleagues think this is all a big joke, but have not offered to cede one of the "faculty" bathrooms to the women. Where "the law" is in all this is an intriguing question.
March 10, 2005
Ann Coulter's New Book
Read about Campusprogress.org's contest to name Ann Coulter's new book. Via Blondsense.
Two Museums
The Lost Museum and the Museum of Bad Art, both via Pen-Elayne.
March 9, 2005
Bug People
Pictures of Walls
March 8, 2005
Thank A Feminist
Via Rox Populi (and posted a bunch of places):
If you're female and...
...you can vote, thank a feminist.
...you get paid as much as men doing the same job, thank a feminist.
...you went to college instead of being expected to quit after high school so your brothers could go because "You'll just get married anyway", thank a feminist.
...you can apply for any job, not just "women's work", thank a feminist
...you can get or give birth control information without going to jail, thank a feminist.
...your doctor, lawyer, pastor judge or legislator is a woman, thank a feminist.
...you play an organized sport, thank a feminist.
...you can wear slacks without being excommunicated from your church or run out of town, thank a feminist.
...your boss isn't allowed to pressure you to sleep with him, thank a feminist.
...you get raped and the trial isn't about your hemline or your previous boyfriends, thank a feminist.
...you start a small business and can get a loan using only your name and credit history, thank a feminist
...you are on trial and are allowed to testify in your own defense, thank a feminist.
...you own property that is solely yours, thank a feminist.
...you have the right to your own salary even if you are married or have a male relative, thank a feminist.
...you get custody of your children following divorce or separation, thank a feminist.
...you get a voice in the raising and care of your children instead of them being completely controlled by the husband/father, thank a feminist.
...your husband beats you and it is illegal and the police stop him instead of lecturing you on better wifely behavior, thank a feminist.
...you are granted a degree after attending college instead of a certificate of completion, thank a feminist.
...you can breastfeed your baby discreetly in a public place and not be arrested, thank a feminist.
...you marry and your civil human rights do not disappear into your husband's rights, thank a feminist.
...you have the right to refuse sex with a diseased husband [or just "husband"], thank a feminist.
...you have the right to keep your medical records confidential from the men in your family, thank a feminist.
...you have the right to read the books you want, thank a feminist.
...you can testify in court about crimes or wrongs your husband has committed, thank a feminist.
...you can choose to be a mother or not a mother in you own time not at the dictates of a husband or rapist, thank a feminist.
...you can look forward to a lifespan of 80 years instead of dying in your 20s from unlimited childbirth, thank a feminist.
...you can see yourself as a full, adult human being instead of a minor who needs to be controlled by a man, thank a feminist.
--Author unknown
Everyone Needs A Hobby
These folks post photos of vintage washing machines.
International Stop Women From "Pirating" Day?
Via Donna Wentworth, from Constitutional Code we learn:
"Under the slogan "Female Pirates Are Also Thieves" ("Auch Raubkopiererinnen sind Verbrecherinnen") the poster above has been distributed in movie theaters and video rental shops. ZKM, an inititiative of several German film associations, which has used the piracy=theft equation over and over also lets you send propaganda e-cards with suggestive "cool slogans" to your friends: "First logged in, then locked in", "Many movies really capture you", "First a blockbuster, then block 2", "The world looks really different in 5 years time", "Do you believe I'll wait 5 years for you" and my personal favourite "Imagine, your kid learns to walk and you're not there."
"Yes, again the golden duo of intimidation & fear to crush down on those pirates: you will go to jail and your loved one will leave you, while your kid grows up without you. I hope my kids won't have to grow up in a world where organisations like ZMK will dominate information freedoms with destructive opinions like "When ideas aren't protected, it is not worth to have any." When ideas aren't free, you won't have any. Same rhetoric, but for future freedom."
Watch It Shred
I don't actually understand this website but can't say I wasn't entertained! I definitely recommend watching the couch get shredded.
Happy International Women's Day
Leaders of the fight for women's equality are marking International Women's Day (Tuesday) by paying tribute to their advancements and achievements over the past century.
At the United Nations, thousands of delegates from 130 countries are meeting to assess progress on a blueprint for equality adopted at a similar conference in Beijing 10 years ago. That blueprint called for improving health care for women, reducing human rights violations against them, and boosting their opportunities for economic and political advancement.
In Asia, there were rallies and protests against a wide range of gender inequalities. At a forum in Bangkok, participants were told that last December's tsunami disaster across the region has led to widespread dangers for women such as giving birth in unsafe conditions.
The European Parliament marked the day by saying male attitudes must change to achieve gender equality. Officials called on EU member states to grant equal wages to women and help make their lives easier.
The first International Women's Day was established in 1910 in Copenhagen and was designed to promote women's suffrage worldwide.
March 7, 2005
Cluck Off and Fry
Farewell To Hans Bethe
Hans Bethe was an icon of my college days. I sat in on many of his lectures, even though I was not a science major. From the NYT:
Hans Bethe, Father of Nuclear Astrophysics, Dies at 98
By WILLIAM J. BROAD
"Hans Bethe, who discovered the violent force behind sunlight, helped devise the atom bomb and eventually cried out against the military excesses of the cold war, died late Sunday. He was 98, among the last of the giants who inaugurated the nuclear age.
"His death was announced by Cornell University, where he worked and taught for 70 years. A spokesman said he died quietly at home.
"Except for the war years at Los Alamos, N.M., Dr. Bethe lived in Ithaca, N.Y., an unpretentious man of uncommon gifts. His students called him Hans and admired his muddy shoes as much as his explaining how certain kinds of stars shine. For number crunching, in lieu of calculators, he relied on a slide rule, its case battered. "For the things I do," he remarked a few years ago, "it's accurate enough."
"For nearly eight decades, Dr. Bethe (pronounced BAY-tah) pioneered some of the most esoteric realms of physics and astrophysics, politics and armaments, long advising the federal government and in time emerging as the science community's liberal conscience."
E-Z Catch Chicken Harvester
This machine is another reason to be a vegetarian.
Funny Comedy Clip by Mitch Hedberg
Access it here, courtesy of I'm Just Sayin'. Some cuss words.
March 6, 2005
Martha Stewart Prison Handicraft
Martha Stewart's Craft of the Day: How to Make Bedroom Slippers Out of Sanitary Napkins.
You need four maxipads to make a pair. Two of them get laid out flat, for the foot part. The other two wrap around the toe area to form the top. Tape or glue each side of the top pieces to the bottom of the foot part. Decorate the tops with whatever you desire, silk flowers, etc.
Slippers' Great Features:
* Soft and Hygienic
* Non-slip grip strips on the soles
* Keeps feet smelling fresh
* No more bending over to mop up spills
* Disposable and biodegradable; environmentally safe
* Three convenient sizes: Regular, Light Day and Get Out the Sand Bags
Handy Passive-Aggressive Relationship Translator
From Hubris.
Onlne Privacy/Publicity
E-mail gives tips to find personal data online
Still, the mountain of historically private information available online will likely only swell.Consumers just have to be aware of the risks, said Siva Vaidhyanathan, an assistant professor of culture and communication at New York University.
"Unless we want to live in an authoritarian society or completely dark culture, we have to accept there are risks associated with free information," he said. "I'm actually kind of pleased by the fact it's coming to people's attention more and more. Every day people must confront how open their lives are. Living under the old illusion is not healthy."
March 5, 2005
Two Recipes
From McSweeney's Internet Tendencv
TWO RECIPES.
By Tim Carvell
Recipe for Geese:
1. Initiate cataclysmic explosion of infinitely dense matter.
2. Wait 11 to 15 billion years.
3. Geese.
Recipe for Ducks:
1. Make geese.
2. Look nearby.
Escher Legos
Via Brutal Women, which in turn credits Alas, A Blog.
Minister of Chocolate!
Jefferson Starbucks
How creepy is this?
Via Rox Populi.
A Good Idea
From 43 Folders:
"Create a sick box - Make up a little box filled with all the stuff youll want fast access to on the next morning you wake up with a cold. TheraFlu, cough drops, fresh box of Kleenex, unwatched DVD youve been saving, a nice trashy novel, and the phone numbers of anyone youd need to contact at work. Believe me, youre in no mood to collect this crap when you wake up with the flu kicking your ass."
Karma and Truckma
Like anyone with a car, I've experienced car troubles. On two occasions my car trouble was that I had locked my keys in my car, so when strangers stopped and let me use *their* cel phones (mine being locked in the car with my keys) to call the AAA to come and break into my car for me, it was much appreciated. (Yes, I can do this myself with a bent coat hanger, if one is available. Hey, I'm an academic, and easily distracted.) So anyway, in the interest of karmic balance I try to reciprocate when it seems safe and appropriate. Recently I decided that yes, I would stop for a van bearing a "George W. Bush," bumpersticker and I was happy I did, because the driver turned out to be a neighbor who I like, despite her misguided politics. She didn't need my cel phone but I was able to give her daughter a ride to school. Today, however, I decided that I would not offer assistance to a truck decorated with bumperstickers that said "Ol' South" and "Confederate American," and several confederate flag stickers.
Later I saw a perfectly functioning car ahead of me in traffic with a bumpersticker that said, "When I Married Mr. Right, I Didn't Know His First Name Was Always." I'd have stopped for that car.
Banned Boondocks Cartoons
March 4, 2005
Bill O'Reilly vs. Free Speech, continued
News Hounds reports that Bill O'Reilly's lawyers are threatening a blogger who LINKED to an O'Reilly column. Whoops! Links are legal! What are you doing to do about that?
Corgis in Party Hats
March 3, 2005
Sick. But Funny. But Sick.
Deviled Ham Jell-O with Carrots, and Pineapple.
Read about this and other retro Jell-O "salad" recipes here.
March 2, 2005
Too Much Free Time?
Send a friend an e-mail reminder to "eat fruit."
Swearasaurus
Globalize that salty vocabulary! Use Swearasaurus to learn how to curse in 165 different cultures. Don't like this idea? Zoaz popatik hartzera!
Moses Toilet Paper Roll Craft Project
Instructions here, for all of our Old-Testament-celebrating readers.
Comparing St. Paul and Baghdad
Ginmar has lived in both places, and compares them in a post titled "Imagine This" at A View From A Broad.
Teaching Creationism With Oreos
DLTK's Bible Activities for Kids
Creation: God made light
"Thanks to the viewer who sent this in!
Carefully take apart an Oreo cookie.
The side without any filling is before God created light.
The filling is the light God created.
This can also be used for God making the moon.
Thanks to Kimberly for this idea!
I just wanted to add something for the Oreo Creation Cookies:
Carefully take apart an Oreo cookie (or use a knife to cut).
The two halves represent separating the light from the darkness."
Media Studies Professors' Grokster Brief
A group of 22 Media studies scholars from around the country signed on to this brief, which was filed with the U.S. Supreme Court yesterday:
INTRODUCTION AND SUMMARY OF ARGUMENTAmici are deeply concerned that recent legal, commercial, and political turmoil surrounding the proliferation and use of peer-to-peer communicative technologies threaten to chill legitimate contributions to teaching and research in this nations institutions of higher education. This Court and the United States Congress have clearly articulated the value of education and scholarship to the workings of the Republic. Further, both acknowledge that teaching and research often require the unauthorized copying, distribution, re-fashioning, and performance of copyrighted works without permission from the copyright holder, and thus have cleared a space within the strictures of copyright law to allow for such publicly beneficial uses. The foundation of that space is fair use, which, though an affirmative defense to the accusation of infringement, has granted educators a certain measure of comfort that they would not be sued by copyright holders for infringement. However, the penumbra of perceived users rights that emanate from Sec. 107 of the Copyright Act has proven inadequate to protect many important acts central to teaching and research. Within this context, the academic utility of searching, indexing, and sharing of copyrighted materials remains in doubt among educators and scholars. Doubt creates a chilling effect, stifling the most creative uses of digital technology in the classroom or in academic research. This chilling effect is the result of a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of peer-to-peer systems. Peer-to-peer technology is not functionally distinct from other, more familiar, less demonized methods of resolving communicative processes such as sending e-mail, creating hyperlinks, and employing search engines such as Google.com. All of these functions potentially (and commonly) infringe the copyrights of others. With this in mind, we conclude that the standard set forth by the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals in In Re Aimster is inadequate to protect the activities of educators and researchers. In fact, it is counterproductive. The problem with the standard that technologies that are capable of substantial non-infringing uses comes not from the question of capability, but from the fact that within the classroom non-infringing is so unclear. The Aimster standard would add another layer of complexity and doubt to the educational project. Therefore it would hinder the progress of the sciences and useful arts. In contrast, the unambiguous declaration by the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals in Grokster -- that the standards this Court set forth in Sony are alive and appropriate for this digital age -- does grant educators comfort and confidence. Nor do certain compromise positions outlined in briefs submitted in support of neither party in this case protect the interests of educators and researchers. Ultimately, we wish to encourage the Court to consider that Sony did more than legalize home taping and time shifting. It democratized participation in the project of recording the collective memory of this dynamic nation. Sony went beyond the traditional parameters of fair use and showed the potential for an emerging set of clearly articulated users rights. Teachers, scholars, critics, journalists, fans, and hobbyists would all benefit greatly under a regime that offered them clarity and confidence about how they interact with works and the copyright system that governs them.
March 1, 2005
Insecurity
So I flew to Atlanta yesterday to give a talk at Georgia State University College of Law, and at the airport I had to remove my top to get through Security. I was wearing a suit, and had already placed my jacket and shoes (and umbrella and purse and laptop...) in bins on the x-ray machine conveyor belt, and then was ordered to "take off my blazer." True, the top I was wearing was cut like a blazer, but it was very tailored and fitted, and was much less likely to be hiding anything nefarious than the baggy sweatshirts being worn by others in line who were not required to similarly disrobe. Luckily I had a camisole underneath, but I was momentarily tempted to remove that too, just to make a statement. I restrained myself only because it occured to me that walking around in a bra doubtlessly fits some residual Ashcroftian terrorism profile.
Ironic Times
Read the Ironic Times here, or you will miss stories like:
BUSH TAPE REVEALS HE USED MARIJUANA: Not the kind used by convicted criminals rotting in Texas jails; the other, youthful-experiment kind.
and
PBS Censors Bad Language From Frontline Documentary On U.S. Troops in Iraq: Changes title to War is Heck.
and
Supreme Court Rejects Challenge to Alabama Law Banning Sale of Sex Toys: If you want a dildo, go to Idaho, writes Justice Thomas for the majority.
Robin Williams Censored at Oscars
From Yahoo News:
The Talk at the Oscars Is Over What Was Not Said
By Mike Collett-White
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - At the Oscar awards, what was not said was probably more interesting than what was. Hollywood's big night on Sunday was beamed to the world with a five-second time delay, and broadcaster ABC ordered some controversial quips cut before the show, sparking debate about how far political correctness should go and freedom of speech controlled.
Comedian Robin Williams said it all when he walked on stage with a piece of white tape over his mouth. Williams was to have performed a song lampooning conservative critic James C. Dobson, whose group had criticized cartoon character SpongeBob SquarePants for appearing in a video it branded "pro-homosexual."
He was going to do it by concentrating on the dark underside of other cartoon characters, asking, for example whether Casper the Friendly Ghost wore that white sheet as a member of the Ku Klux Klan.
Marc Shaiman, who wrote Williams' original routine, said he decided to withdraw the material after ABC raised objections that would have led to him re-writing 11 of 36 lines. ABC declined to comment.
February 27, 2005
Another Humorless Female Blogger
Excerpt from One Good Thing posting by Flea:
"In case you are not familiar with this bit of snark, here is a re-enactment of a phenomenon that happens about every three months or so:
Popular, Liberal Male Blogger: Why don't women blog? I've looked on my blogroll and I don't see any women bloggers. Therefore, they must not exist. Women must not be interested in thinky stuff like politics or computers.
45 Women Bloggers respond in the comments section: WTF? We all have blogs!
Liberal, Male Blogger: I don't mean blogs about tampons. All women do is talk about feminine hygiene products. I mean, Where are all the women who blog about important stuff; the stuff *I'm* interested in.
45 Women Bloggers: You're right. We only talk about feminine hygiene products. Here's more talk about feminine hygiene products: You are a douche.
Liberal Male Blogger: Wahhhh! You're oppressing me! Censorship! My civil rights are being violated!
One Asshole Woman: I am so embarrassed to be a woman right now! Don't you listen to those hairy bitches, Liberal Male Blogger! *I* understand you!
Liberal Male Blogger: See there? One woman has validated me! That means you all are wrong and I am right!
45 Women Bloggers: douche.
Liberal Male Blogger: Wahhhh!
Repeat in three months with a different blogger. I'll point it out next time it happens."
Props to Keri Sewell
Lesbian's picture in tux cut from yearbook (See also Discourse.net):
GREEN COVE SPRINGS, Fla. -- "County school officials are backing a principal's decision to bar a picture of a lesbian student dressed in a tuxedo from the high school yearbook.
"Sam Ward, principal of Fleming Island High School, said he pulled the senior class picture because Kelli Davis was wearing boy's clothes. His decision was debated Thursday at a Clay County school board meeting that drew 200 people, but the board took no action, and Superintendent David Owens said the decision will stand.
"Most of the 24 people who spoke at the meeting supported Kelli Davis.
"This is not to be treated as a gay rights issue," said her mother, Cindi Davis. "Rather it's a human rights issue."
"Others applauded Ward's decision, including Karen Gordon, who said, "When uniformity is compromised, then authority no longer holds."
"Officials at the northeastern Florida school have said the picture was pulled from the yearbook because Davis did not follow the rules on dress. School board attorney Bruce Bickner said there is no written dress code for senior pictures, but principals have the authority to set standards.
"The student editor of the yearbook, Keri Sewell, was fired after refusing her adviser's order to take the picture out."
Numa Numa
Internet Fame Is Cruel Mistress for a Dancer of the Numa Numa by ALAN FEUER and JASON GEORGE in today's NYT:
"There was a time when embarrassing talents were a purely private matter. If you could sing "The Star Spangled Banner" in the voice of Daffy Duck, no one but your friends and family would ever have to know. But with the Internet, humiliation - like everything else - has now gone public. Upload a video of yourself playing flute with your nose or dancing in your underwear, and people from Toledo to Turkmenistan can watch.
"Here, then, is the cautionary tale of Gary Brolsma, 19, amateur videographer and guy from New Jersey, who made the grave mistake of placing on the Internet a brief clip of himself dancing along to a Romanian pop song. Even in the bathroom mirror, Mr. Brolsma's performance could only be described as earnest but painful. His story suggests that the quaint days when cultural trinkets, like celebrity sex tapes, were passed around like novels in Soviet Russia are over. It says a little something of the lightning speed at which fame is made these days.
"To begin at the beginning:
"Mr. Brolsma, a pudgy guy from Saddle Brook, made a video of himself this fall performing a lip-synced version of "Dragostea Din Tei," a Romanian pop tune, which roughly translates to "Love From the Linden Trees." He not only mouthed the words, he bounced along in what he called the "Numa Numa Dance" - an arm-flailing, eyebrow-cocked performance executed without ever once leaving the chair.
"In December, the Web site newgrounds.com, a clearinghouse for online videos and animation, placed a link to Mr. Brolsma on its home page and, soon, there was a river of attention. "Good Morning America" came calling and he appeared. CNN and VH1 broadcast the clip. Parodists tried their own Numa Numa dances online. By yesterday, the Brolsma rendition of "Love From the Linden Trees" had attracted nearly two million hits on the original Web site alone.
February 26, 2005
Is this Satire, Or For Real?
I can't tell! Here is the site of origination, "Date to Save":
10 Tips for Effective Missionary Dating
1. If he tells your that you are hot...
Tell him God made you hot.
2. If he wants to hold your hand...
Give him a Bible.
3. If he tries to get closer...
Tell him the Holy Spirit is wooing him.
4. If he asks to pay for dinner...
Remind him that Jesus also paid a debt He did not owe!
5. If he reaches his arm around you...
Tell him that nobody will ever be as close to you as Jesus is.
6. If he tries to kiss you...
Remind him that a kiss killed your Savior.
7. If he asks to come inside...
Ask him if he has asked Jesus to come inside his heart.
8. If he tells you he loves you...
Tell him that Jesus loves him.
9. If he gets angry that you won't put out...
Clarify to him that W.W.J.D. does NOT mean "Who would Jesus Do."
10. After you dump him...
Tell him that Jesus Christ will never leave or forsake him.
Don't Want To Boogie?
Assperations
Via "Hannidate," Sean Hannity's dating service, you can meet spelling-challenged guys like this:
"I am a good Catholic just like Hannity who believes in strong moral principles and sound judgement. I work way to hard to spend the time to meet new people, and I hope this will be a good way to meet a lovely young woman who loves Christ!!! At the age of 22 I am starting my career as a real estate agent. While my true passion is investing; where my favorite investments are real estate and stocks. Of coarse I own both and intend to expand my efforts. If you are a good conservative christian woman who can appriciate a hard working, kind, and loving man who devotes his life and assperations to Christ then we would be great foreach other. "
February 25, 2005
Hard to Dispute the Truth of This Article's Title
"S.C. Trappers Practice Dying Art"
".... Trapping used to be an integral part of farm life in South Carolina, a necessary trade to protect livestock or provide a second income. So many people trapped beaver that the species was nearly wiped out in the state.
But in 2004, only 670 furbearer trapping licenses were sold, compared to more than 100,000 deer hunting licenses, according the state Department of Natural Resources. The two-month winter trapping season that ends next month will pass largely unnoticed.
"Now it's a whole industry of professional-type folks, kind of like the pest control business," said Jay Butfiloski, the Natural Resources Department's furbearer project supervisor. ...."
February 24, 2005
Kitty Porn
Lots of great pix here, via commentor Apostolia.
Bible Studies Wih BlondeSense
From the BlondeSense Book of Genesis:
Jacob offers to work for seven years to pay for Rachel. As it turns out, he is tricked into having sex with her sister, Leah, instead, so he has to work for another seven years so in order to pay for them both. 29:18-30
Jacob is tricked by Laban, the father of Rachel and Leah. Jacob asks for Rachel so that he can "go in unto her." But Laban gives him Leah instead, and Jacob "went in unto her [Leah]" by mistake. Jacob was fooled until morning -- apparently he didn't know who he was going in unto. Finally they worked things out and Jacob got to "go in unto" Rachel, too. 29:21-30
Vesselhood?
(The Return of) Ignatz on "Subliminal messages from the Supreme Court:"
"So I'm reading an opinion that the Supreme Court put out today, about whether somebody injured on a dredge in Boston Harbor is covered by this specific federal legislation, and it's all about the meaning of the word "vessel." So the Reporter of Decisions -- the person at the Court who writes the executive summary of the decision, which appears at the beginning -- writes that the Court holds that certain precedents did not change the "definition of vesselhood." Vesselhood? Who ever heard of a word such as "vesselhood"? And googling it, I find that the word only seems to pop up in religious and mystical contexts, computer gaming, and discussion of the Vagina Monologues. So I'm wondering, is the subliminal message here about religion or vaginas?"
Wonder why he ruled out computer gaming.
February 23, 2005
Ministries and Woministries
Over at Pinko Feminist Hellcat President-For-Life Sheezlebub is awarding government ministries. I'd like to be Minister of Chocolate, thanks for asking!
It's Got to What?
Listen to Senator Rick Santorum's supporters chant, "Hey hey, ho ho, Social Security has got to go!" here.
Happy Thoughts
From Dadahead (click link for more cute critter photos), via the Leiter Reports.
February 21, 2005
Who Y'all Calling "Cracker"?
"The Crackers," once again via Pen-Elayne. See this too!
Fantastic "Zits"
Accessible here.
Britain's Navy Is Encouraging Gays and Lesbians to Enlist
Full article in today's NYT, opens as follows:
"Five years after Britain lifted its ban on gays in the military, the Royal Navy has begun actively encouraging gays and lesbians to enlist and has pledged to make life easier for them when they do.
The navy announced today that it had asked Stonewall, a group that lobbies for gay rights, to help it develop better strategies for recruiting and retaining gay and lesbian sailors. It said, too, that one such strategy may well be to advertise for recruits in gay magazines and newspapers."
The U.K. got rid of slavery well before we did, too.
Women and Blogging
The great Echidne of the Snakes post excerpted below can and should be read in its entirety here:
"....The story usually goes like this: Some blogger, a male one, notices that there are very few women bloggers among the top one hundred most popular political blogs (or in some other similar measure). He then points out that the internet doesn't discriminate so the reason for this cannot be in discrimination. In what then? The answer usually consists of some kind of a combination of the following: a) women are not interested in politics, b) women don't like the rough nature of political writing and commenting and c) women are too busy cooking and taking care of children to spend time on the blogs. Sometimes a note is added to the effect that women might be above all such bickering and self-aggrandizing behavior or that women are genetically doomed not to reach for positions which indicate dominance in the human society. And so on.
"The next stage of the lamentations is the chorus of responses. These take several different forms from purely misogynistic shit to arguments that there are plenty of famous women bloggers, only nobody knows about them. I'm kidding here, but truly the chorus does cover the whole octave of possibilities. Somewhere in the refrain the following points are emphasized: that the early adopters have a great advantage on the internet and most of the early adopters were men, that men tend to link to blogs by other men and that the measures we use for gauging popularity are in themselves biased towards older blogs and those that belong to various blogger groups. All of this is true in some ways, as are many of the other theories I have summarized here. But none of them are completely true and many of them are totally untested against actual data. ...."
T-Mobile Sidekicks are Hackable
It happened to Paris Hilton and:
"She was pretty upset about it. It's one thing to have people looking at your sex tapes, but having people reading your personal e-mails is a real invasion of privacy."
Articles about same here, and here, found via the wonderful Pen-Elayne.
February 20, 2005
Learn English or Lose Kids
Learn English, Judge Tells Moms: A Tennessee jurist who has ordered mothers to take language lessons wins the praise of some locals but raises alarm among rights advocates. By Ellen Barry, in the LA Times, via Alas, A Blog:
LEBANON, Tenn. "A judge hearing child abuse and neglect cases in Tennessee has given an unusual instruction to some immigrant mothers who have come before him: Learn English, or else.
"Most recently, it was an 18-year-old woman from Oaxaca, Mexico, who had been reported to the Department of Children's Services for failing to immunize her toddler and show up for appointments. At a hearing last month to monitor the mother's custody of the child, Wilson County Judge Barry Tatum instructed the woman to learn English and to use birth control, the Lebanon Democrat newspaper reported.
"Last October, Tatum gave a similar order to a Mexican woman who had been cited for neglect of her 11-year-old daughter, said a lawyer who is representing the woman in her appeal. Setting a court date six months away, the judge told the woman she should be able to speak English at a fourth-grade level by that meeting. If she failed, he warned, he would begin the process of termination of parental rights.
"The court specially informs the mother that if she does not make the effort to learn English, she is running the risk of losing any connection legally, morally and physically with her daughter forever," reads a court order from the hearing, according to Jerry Gonzalez, the Nashville attorney who represents the woman."
February 19, 2005
Star Wars Designer Edition
Here, via Pen-Elayne.
February 18, 2005
Gates
Via the NYT
Via Rox Populi
Funny Mazda Commercial
Arf.
Loonatics
From The Talent Show:
"Hoping to breathe new life into its animated Looney Tunes franchise and prop up the WB television network's slumping Kids' WB line-up, Time Warner Inc.'s Warner Bros. is planning to launch a new cartoon series this fall based on "re-imagined" versions of Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Tasmanian Devil, Lola Bunny, Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote.
"Warner Bros. has created angular, slightly menacing-looking versions of the classic Looney Tunes characters for its new series, dubbed "Loonatics" and set in the year 2772. Names for the new characters haven't been finalized, but they are likely to be derived from the originals: Buzz Bunny, for example. Each new character retains personality quirks of the original. The new Bugs, for example, will be the natural leader of the Loonatics' spaceship; the new Daffy will remain confident that he is the one who should be in charge."
Cripes, can't the copyright maximalists do something about this travesty? :>)
What She Said!
What She Said about "Peek":
"Not a very promising start for PEEK. Same blogs, different day. Your blogroll is all guys except Wonkette, which isn't really a blog. She has a staff working for her, you know. Real bloggers do their own code and graphics.
"Every blogger you listed was male, which is an interesting trick since most bloggers are women. You didn't even list What She Said! http://whatshesaid.the-goddess.org/ which is a list of almost 500 progressive women bloggers, or feministblogs.org, nor is there one feminist blog, nor one Pagan political blog ( http://the-goddess.org/blog/ for example). You didn't even list John Aravosis' Americablog, the gay political which helped break the Gannon story.
"You have to dig a little deeper to get the respect of the blogosphere."
*****
Make sure you go push your own blogs, ladies - no one else is going to do it for us. I'm so sick of this bullshit I could scream. Old boy networks are bad enough, but this young boy clique on the 'net is getting old fast.
Update: Peek has now added several excellent blogs written by women.
A Man Who Gives Men A Good Name
Alternet is a "lefty" online news site that now runs "Peek" which it calls "The Blog of Blogs." Below is the text of the email Barry Deutsch, Ampersand from Alas A Blog, sent to Peek, as reported on Alas A Blog (go there to read update):
"Hi! Im Barry (aka Ampersand). Im flattered that you include my blog, Alas, a Blog, on your blogroll. Thank you!
"However, Im disturbed that theres only one blog written by a woman on your blogroll. There are many excellent blogs out there by women, both specifically feminist and not; Wonkette should not be the only one listed!
"Im also disturbed that theres only one blog with a focus on feminism listed - mine - and its one thats written primarily by a man. If youre going to list only one blog paying attention to feminism, it would make sense to choose one written by a woman.
"There are many excellent feminist blogs by women - if you visit Alas and look on the sidebar, theres an entire section devoted to my most-recommended blogs about feminism, nearly all of which are written by women. I think XX and Feministing may be particularly suitable choices, for their broad coverage of feminist issues, but I strongly recommend all of the feminist blogs on my blogroll.
"In addition, there many of the best-written lefty poliblogs are by women. Two that come immediately to mind are Body and Soul and Sisyphus Shrugged. Im sure other bloggers are emailing you suggestions, as well. Visit whatshesaid.the-goddess.org and browse the blogroll there; you will find many blogs well worth your time and your blogroll.
"I am not accusing you of being deliberately sexist or of deliberately slighting women. However, because the tendency to give primacy to male voices is so deeply embedded in our culture, even people of good will can unintentionally replicate and contribute to this sexism merely by following the path of least resistance.
"Fortunately, there is a simple way to repair the problem with your blogroll - just add some excellent female bloggers!
"If you dont do that, however, then I must respectfully ask you to remove Alas, a blog from your blogroll.
"Thank you for your consideration."
Update: Peek has now added several excellent blogs written by women.
Boy Howdy
The Gay Child Left Behind, by DAN SAVAGE in the NYT
"So far 2005 hasn't been a very good year for gays and lesbians. Secretary of Education Margaret Spellings slammed Buster, an animated rabbit, for visiting a Vermont girl with same-sex parents; President Bush renewed his call for an anti-gay amendment to the Constitution; and a deadly new strain of H.I.V. has surfaced.
"But there was one bright spot this week. On Monday, Maya Keyes, the daughter of Alan Keyes, officially declared herself a lesbian at a gay rights rally in Annapolis, Md. It was a bit of good news for gays and lesbians, particularly those who are connoisseurs of schadenfreude. Or was it?
"Alan Keyes is the Republican who moved to Illinois last year to run against Barack Obama for the United States Senate. To describe Mr. Keyes as an opponent of gay rights is putting it mildly: during his campaign Mr. Keyes described homosexuality as "selfish hedonism." When asked if he thought Mary Cheney, the lesbian daughter of Vice President Dick Cheney, was a selfish hedonist, he replied, "Of course she is."
"Learning that a prominent conservative like Mr. Keyes (or Randall Terry, the anti-abortion-turned-antigay-rights crusader whose son revealed last spring he is gay) has a gay relative is nothing new. Newt Gingrich, for instance, has a lesbian half-sister. But for gays and lesbians there's something particularly satisfying about watching a prominent antigay conservative learn that his or her own child is homosexual. It smacks of cosmic retribution: Mr. Keyes now has to choose between his antigay "pro-family" rhetoric and a member of his own family.
"Sadly for Maya Keyes, her father apparently has more affection for his ideology than for his daughter. She says her parents kicked her out of the house and have refused to pay for her education. (Thankfully, some of those evil gay people have come forward to pay her tuition at Brown next year through the Point Foundation.) Perhaps Mr. and Mrs. Cheney could find the time to call Mr. and Mrs. Keyes and explain how parents who actually value their families react when they learn one of their children is gay.
"But I can't enjoy this news about Maya Keyes as much as most gays and lesbians. As a parent, you see, I feel Alan Keyes's pain - and Randall Terry's too. I can empathize with their desire not to see their children grow up to be one of us because I live in mortal fear of my child growing up to be one of them." [emphasis added]
Screw Karma
This morning I got my washing machine fixed. Have a Whirlpool washer that has broken down three times in three years, luckily sprang for the extended warranty. Anyway, the repair guy arrived, took the thing apart, and announced there were two missing screws, without which he could not affect a repair, as he did not have any comparable screws in his tool kit or in his truck. I went and got the random screw collection from the garage. He sifted through it and found two perfect screws, which he reported fit as if made for the machine. Here is my theory: They fell out into the washing machine barrel while it was operating. I unknowingly moved them into the dryer with a load of wet clothes. Im used to finding random things in my dryer, because I am not always conscientious about checking pockets before doing laundry. So I found the screws mixed up with the usual assortment of spare change and tissue scraps and pencils and other linty April fresh debris, and consigned them to the random screw bucket, where the repair man located them, and now they are reinstalled. Screw karma!
Echidne on Women in Afghanistan
Excerpted from here.
"In Afghanistan, women's lives are [now] perhaps somewhat better, though formal measures of equality may not be very precise in this context. Keeping this in mind, it is interesting to read that:
Afghan President Hamid Karzai will appoint a female provincial governor for the first time in Afghanistan's history. Karzai will be choosing the governor of the central Bamiyan province from a short list of all-female candidates that includes the former Minister of Women's Affairs, Habiba Sorabi, reports the Associated Press.
Many see the appointment of a female governor as a positive step towards promoting women's rights in Afghanistan. Earlier this year, Karzai appointed three women to his newly formed Cabinet that consists of 30 people.
"In fact, the Afghanistan parliament has more women than the U.S. Congress, though this is due to the quotas that were set for women's participation in the former country. The latter country cannot possibly have quotas: that would smack of communism. Unless we mean the common informal quota of regarding one or two women as an adequate number for female representation on all kinds of boards."
February 17, 2005
Online Gaming Sexism
From Utopian Hell:
"Stumbled on this one while on my lunch break and searching for patch notes for World of Warcraft. It seems youve got a massive pole up your ass if you cant just take male harassment in MMOs.
"The thread is here. Ill just paraphrase it. A female player logged into her female character and was greeted by a male who told her she had a nice chest. She doesnt say exactly what he says, but it offended her, so she told him to knock it off and that she was reporting him. He went on to scold her about how her doing that would ruin the game for everyone else, and that it was just good fun.
"Now, granted, she over-reacted a little bit (she said she never wanted to play the character again because of the comment), but it wasnt necessarily the original posters upset about the avatar having big tits that got me riled, either. It was the responses of other people in the community. Apparently, if you dont just roll over and take it, youre just a big stick in the mud. Oh, and didnt they tell you that video games are a boys world, and you should just deal with it?
Read on, my friend"
Sounds to me like youre a touchy broad who has a weight problem and spends too much time at home.
- Mariousmoo
Im a woman as well, get over it.
Seeing as the game was created by men, as is evidenced by the female Night Elf avatar and her dance, just deal with it.
- Absalom
Musical Condoms
There is no danger to users of electrocution, claims the inventor.
February 16, 2005
Freaky Westlaw Commercial
This is supposed to make lawyers feel good about Westlaw, but it reminded me too much of faculty meetings! Credit Elizabeth Featherman with the link.
More Wingnut Cluelessness
Video accessible here, transcript below via Jossip.com:
The conservative talking head [Ann Coulter] was being interviewed by Bob McKeown on Fifth Estate on Canada's CBC in that low droaning voice we're huge fans of when she got her facts terribly, terribly wrong about the Vietnam war.
Coulter: "Canada used to be one of our most loyal friends and vice-versa. I mean Canada sent troops to Vietnam - was Vietnam less containable and more of a threat than Saddam Hussein?"
McKeown interrupts: "Canada didn't send troops to Vietnam."
Coulter: "I don't think that's right."
McKeown: "Canada did not send troops to Vietnam."
Coulter (looking desperate): "Indochina?"
McKeown: "Uh no. Canada ...second World War of course. Korea. Yes. Vietnam No."
Coulter: "I think you're wrong."
McKeown: "No, took a pass on Vietnam."
Coulter: "I think you're wrong."
McKeown: "No, Australia was there, not Canada."
Coulter: "I think Canada sent troops."
McKeown: "No."
Coulter: "Well. I'll get back to you on that."
McKeown tags out in script: "Coulter never got back to us -- but for the record, like Iraq, Canada sent no troops to Vietnam."
We're All Gay
Abstinence Only Suckers
Buy them at the Abstinence Clearinghouse.
February 15, 2005
Can You Spot The Hidden Message?
From Snopes.com.
W stands for Weird
At Rigorous Intuition you can see photos of George W. Bush touching bald men's heads.
Berube on Cole v. Goldberg
I know the blogosphere is on to other things, but this excerpt from Michael Berube's blog was too great not to re-post:
"Juan Coles astonishing serial demolition of Jonah Goldberg is one of the most lopsided, embarrassing exchanges I have ever seen in any medium. I mean, the most corrupt state gaming commission in the entire sport of boxing would be appalled. What is there to say about a leading right-wing pundit whos too stupid even to pretend to have read a book about Iraq, and too stupid to know when to crawl back into his Corner, sniff the smelling salts, and have his trainer toss in the towel? And remember, this isnt any old Clownhall wannabe were talking about-- this is the editor-at-large-or-extra-large of the joint founded by William F. Buckley Jr., who, for all his many faults, actually read books and could even decline cornu in his younger days.
The rumor is that Jonah is changing the name of his blog from The Goldberg File to Totally Uninformed Comment as a permanent rebuke to Professor Coles out-of-touch liberal-elite insistence that people who declaim about Iraq in American mass media should know something about the subject at hand. The thing he challenged or alleged was simply my unworthy stature to have an opinion, writes Jonah. Let me spell it out again: I think Cole is the sort of bullying professor most of us have encountered in one way or another. No doubt this is quite true, if most of us means wealthy, pampered, entitled right-wing know-nothings who behave in class as if our opinion is as good as anyone elses because, you know, because everyone has a right to their opinion and shouldnt be bullied by professors with expertise. And Im pretty sure Jonah is the sort of student most of us have encountered in one way or another, too."
Also, Cole and Goldberg are debating tonight on Air America's "Majority Report."
Liberation
In an article about the documentary "Inside Deep Throat" one reads:
"After Deep Throat opened in Times Square, attention from media critics and outraged conservatives turned it into a must-see movie. Arriving amid the womens liberation movement, Deep Throat was also heralded as a celebration of female sexual fulfillment.
It was the first time respectable middle-class women went to porn theaters, social critic Camille Paglia says in an interview in Inside Deep Throat. Other cultural commentators appearing in the documentary include Norman Mailer, Ruth Westheimer, Gore Vidal, Erica Jong and Hugh Hefner."
Exactly who "heralded 'Deep Throat' as a "celebration of female sexual fulfillment"? Maybe Camille Paglia, but no one that I would consider a feminist. One doesn't have to favor censorship or chastity to dislike pornography, and any women viewing "Deep Throat" could predict what impact it would have on male sexual partners, and the requests they might be emboldened to make.
February 14, 2005
Send Chocolate
If you think the card is a little strange, check out the site, especially the "Ancient Wisdom" links at this page.
Onion Love Coupons
Funny, intended for adults, and not just any adults either, only those with ribald senses of humor.
Law and Order Coloring Book
Page through the entire volume here. Note to the clueless: I'm pretty sure it is supposed to be "satire" but let's call it "parody" to help with any copyright fair use claim. Also via Uncle Horn Head.
Know What the Sticker On the Rear Window Says?
Find out here! Via Uncle Horn Head. Just don't put one on my car, I'm very sensitive about the 28 point K turns that parallel parking often seems to require of me.
February 11, 2005
The Leiter Reports on "Looksee Visits At Law Schools"
Issue raised here.
Is This Funny?
This video? How about this game? You may be seeing both at a theater near you. Via Rox Populi.
Make your Own Bumperstickers!
Click here, it's fun and free if you don't actually order any!
Mouse Flavored Glass?
February 10, 2005
Micrographic Novel Project
Internet art! Read the pithy, creative, sometimes disconcerting monocromatic literary stylings here, then write your own story.
E-Valentines from "Bad Cupid"
Bad Cupid e-valentines are silly, free, and intended for adults (I hesitate to say "mature audiences").
The Daily Scribble
Read the latest, "Bush Gets a Makeover for Europe," here.
February 9, 2005
Hot Chair On Chair Action
Before you can enter the hot Funiture Porn site, you must agree to the following legal mumbo jumbo:
1.I understand that by clicking "Enter" I am acknowledging that I am a computer nerd over the legal adult lawful age of consent in my country, state, county, city and/or incorporated village and too scared to go inside a store and buy real pornography.
2. (to be filled in later)
3. I indemnify and hold blameless the godless creators of this morally reprehensible garbage for any and all damages which may result, either directly or indirectly, from accessing this material. I further assume all liability for any damages which might result from viewing, accessing, visiting this site or allowing others to do so, including having my eyes melt off my face, my brain turn into Jell-O Brand Gelatin Dessert or an increased desire to shoot at people from a book depository with a Mannlicher-Carcano.
4. I agree that I will not steal this site outright and put it on my own website and pass it off as my own work. Nor will I use, view, access, share, think about, or show my sniggering co-workers this site in violation of international agreements and/or treaties, or federal, state, county, city or incorporated village laws or their non-U.S. equivalent. Nor will I share any materials on this site with minors or allow minors to view any portion of this site, or mix paper and plastic recyclables or allow minors to mix paper and plastic recyclables.
....
Neologisms
The Washington Post Style section published winning submissions to its annual contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. (Got these via Pen-Elayne, but can't seem to find a WaPo link - sorry.)
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
February 8, 2005
Department of "Doesn't Get It"
So if you ran a political blog, what might you call postings dedicated to blog administration? Blog management? Blog maintenance? Blog logistics? Nope, "housekeeping," just so the contrast with "politics" is clear, apparently. And what might you label it when readers game the trackbacks? Gaming the trackbacks? No, "link-whoring" of course.
Let me give props to Judge Marilyn Hall Patel of the Northern District of California. I didn't much like her opinion in Napster, but I sure enjoyed it when a male attorney in her courtroom asked if she might take care of some "housekeeping" for him, and she about handed him his head.
February 7, 2005
Gamecocks Football
Go here, click on the "2001" and experience the magic that is Williams-Brice Stadium as the University of South Carolina Gamecocks take the field. See mascot Cocky do the funky chicken! Cameo by Lou Holtz near the end. He retired, and Steve Spurrier has taken over.
American Nudist Research Library
Sexism Some Putative Liberal "Endorses"
Sexism I Can Endorse! by Mathhew Yglesias
"Warren Bell in The National Review Online offers an observation I can get behind: Women aren't as funny as men. Or, at least, most funny people are men, which lets us avoid trying to calculate average humorousness across large populations. Phoebe Maltz protests that she's funny so Bell is full of shit. But one counterexample does not a statistical irregularity prove. Lisa Leslie is a better basketball player than most men (obviously I could take her, but most...) , but that doesn't change the fact that men are better at basketball on the whole. I can't tell what causal mechanism Bell is trying to argue for here. My friend Dave thinks it's because women are too nice. I think the culprit is, pretty clearly, the tendency of magazines to print photographs of attracted women accompanied by commentary from the women in question asserting that she's looking to meet someone funny. This creates incentives all out of proportion to reality for men to try and funnify themselves.
"Speaking as someone who considers himself to be pretty funny (people who know me from real life can weigh in on the accuracy of this assertion), a good sense of humor seems to me to be an irrationally overvalued personality trait. Thanks to television, The Onion, etc., a small number of professionally funny people can meet the entire world's humor demand. Something like kindness or personal warmth you need to know actual people to get. Nevertheless, nobody (myself included) actually sees it that way."
Funny women probably don't want to spend time with Yglesias, I know I wouldn't.
Dobson's Book Gets Reviewed
Here are excerpts from some reviews of Dobson's book, "The Strong-Willed Child: Birth Through Adolescence," that were posted to Amazon.com:
"It is so good to hear that there remain God-fearing people who are beating Christ's love into children. As I punished myself for my own impure thoughts, I was struck by how much better it would be to have a stern but loving man like Dr. Dobson administering the punishment to my red and swollen buttocks." -- Micheal Finn "In the service to the great and beloved Leader"
"While I agreed with Dr. Dobson when he wrote that parents should beat their kids with sticks or paddles rather than with bare hands, I wondered why he didn't mention electrical cords, cattle prods or stun guns. I like to call the latter, "Jesus' Thunder." Nothing gets a kid's attention faster than 50,000 volts of electricity arcing between two contacts." -- Gen. JC Christian, patriot
"This book is of the same cloth as Dobson's other child-rearing tomes: more of the "spank and pray" school. Dobson is all about adults imposing their wills on kids in all areas. He doesn't understand the difference between respect and fear, and that's the main fallacy behind his so-called theories. Any bully can command fear - it takes some finesse, compassion and hard work to earn respect." -- a reader
"This guy is a complete hack. I work with children, and I see more confused, abused, and abusing children (drugs, rape, fights) from fundamentalist families than any other source. This type of parenting is a lie, and if you raise your kids this way please do it somewhere other than Schenectady, NY so I can live in relative peace." -- B. Lee, Voice of Reason
"The irony here is that if I beat Mr. Dobson for writing this book, I would be the one to going to jail." -- a reader
February 6, 2005
Dobson "Focuses on Your Child"
James Dobson truly frightens me. Read his advice to parents of "strong-willed and rebellious females" below (full text here) and try to imagine the nature and contents of the "comments" he is encouraging parents to make:
"I strongly recommend that parents of strong-willed and rebellious females, especially, quietly keep track of the particulars of their daughters’ menstrual cycles. Not only should you record when their periods begin and end each month, but also make a comment or two each day about moods. I think you will see that the emotional blowups that tear the family apart are cyclical in nature. Premenstrual tension at that age can produce a flurry of skirmishes every 28 days.
"If you know they are coming, you can retreat to the storm cellar when the wind begins to blow. You can also use this record to teach your girls about premenstrual syndrome and how to cope with it. Unfortunately, many parents never seem to notice the regularity and predictability of severe conflict with their daughters. Again, I recommend that you watch the calendar. It will tell you so much about your girls."
Funny Rocky Parody
February 4, 2005
If You Find Yourself in Cincy...
I'm in Cincinnati for a conference and had some free time, and spent it at the National Underground Railroad Freedom Center, an amazing museum here, right on the Ohio river. Afterwards I took advantage of the nice weather to walk across the Roebling bridge into Covington, Ky and back. Now my feet are sore but I'll feel less guilty about eating dessert!
I've done Underground Railroad "tours" here and there, but they tended to emphasize the courage and generosity of the white people who helped the slaves escape to freedom. This museum does a better job of focusing on the black people who risked their lives for freedom and also each other. Very inspiring and humbling.
February 3, 2005
Challenging Stereotypes
Check out this clip of reggae performer Matisyahu.
Who Drew the Short Chef Costume?
And aren't those heels hard to cook in? Learn more at Crooked Timber.
Science Fair Project for Overachieving Children
Random Webcams
Indulge your voyeuristic impulses here.
February 2, 2005
Be a Top 10 Law School, or Just Look Like One!
If you are affiliated with a "climber" law school, or just like to make fun of people who are, (or have a weird and alarming sense of humor), you'll appreciate this, via the Leiter Reports.
Happy Groundhog's Day!
February 1, 2005
Guess what this is?
Answer here (see #7 of 10).
The Right-Winger's Guide To Pretending To Be An Idiot
Great August J. Pollack cartoon here.
January 31, 2005
Vegetarian "Wild Kingdom"
Watch antelope deliverance here. Now slip the cat some rennetless cheese or something.
When Geeks Have Too Much Free Time
Hey I love geeks, I really do, but this is a pretty oddball use of time and resources.
January 30, 2005
Singing in the Rain For VW
This is fun to watch, for an advertisement. Via Pen-Elayne.
January 29, 2005
South Carolina Ice Storm
McMars
More creatively enhanced photos from Mars here.
January 28, 2005
INFINITE HASSELHOFF
This is one of the most frightening things I've seen on the Internet - click at your own risk.
The Shell Game
Play it here!
Dinosaur Eats Creationist For Breakfast!
Llama Llama Duck
Turn up the sound, click here, and engage in postmodern semiotic deconstruction. Or, sing along.
Cheney's Cold
Be sure and read this WaPo article about Cheney's doofus clothing choices for the ceremony at Auschwitz pictured above. Here's how it opens:
"At yesterday's gathering of world leaders in southern Poland to mark the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz, the United States was represented by Vice President Cheney. The ceremony at the Nazi death camp was outdoors, so those in attendance, such as French President Jacques Chirac and Russian President Vladimir Putin, were wearing dark, formal overcoats and dress shoes or boots. Because it was cold and snowing, they were also wearing gentlemen's hats. In short, they were dressed for the inclement weather as well as the sobriety and dignity of the event.
"The vice president, however, was dressed in the kind of attire one typically wears to operate a snow blower.
"Cheney stood out in a sea of black-coated world leaders because he was wearing an olive drab parka with a fur-trimmed hood. It is embroidered with his name. It reminded one of the way in which children's clothes are inscribed with their names before they are sent away to camp. And indeed, the vice president looked like an awkward boy amid the well-dressed adults.
"Like other attendees, the vice president was wearing a hat. But it was not a fedora or a Stetson or a fur hat or any kind of hat that one might wear to a memorial service as the representative of one's country. Instead, it was a knit ski cap, embroidered with the words "Staff 2001." It was the kind of hat a conventioneer might find in a goodie bag." ....
Saw this first at the wonderful World O'Crap, which featured the following commentary:
Hey, it's hard work operating a snow blower. Danged hard work. And it's hard work being the Vice President. And it's cold work too. So, if Dick chose to wear his casual ski parka with his name embroidered on it, the "Staff 2001" ski cap that he got in the office white elephant exchange, and his second-best pair of hunting boots to this ceremony, who are we to criticize him for failing to respect the solemnity of the occasion? At least he didn't tell the other dignitaries to "go f--- themselves."
Well, not that we know of, anyway.
January 26, 2005
Twinkie Suishi
Items Needed:
3 Hostess Twinkies
Assorted dried fruits
Assorted fruity candies
2 green fruit roll ups
Dried mangoes (looks like pickled ginger)
DIRECTIONS:
Slice Hostess Twinkies into pieces about an inch tall. Slice fruit roll ups in strips to be long enough and wide enough to wrap around the Hostess Twinkie pieces. Wrap the fruit roll ups around the Hostess Twinkie pieces. Place dried fruits and candies into the cream filling. Place Twinkie rolls on a plate or in a bento box. Garnish with strips of dried mango to resemble pickled ginger and serve with chopsticks. Wasabi optional and most likely fairly disgusting with Twinkies.
The recipe, which allegedly "transforms the much loved Twinkie into a hip and tropical flavored treat" is available at Planet Twinkie. Learned about it from Pen-Elayne. Note to vegetarians: You can't have this kind of sushi either because Twinkies are made with beef fat.
Christian Boxers
Buy them here! Wear them anywhere!
January 25, 2005
Once More, With Feeling
New DaVinci Works!
Completely freaking amazing story here, by all means click on the link to watch the DaVideo!
Teaser paragraph: "A forgotten workshop of Leonardo da Vinci, complete with 500-year-old frescos and a secret room to dissect human cadavers, has been discovered in Florence, Italy, researchers said on Tuesday."
EBay Feedback
Thanks to Sadly, No, today we learn about about an eBay user who tends to leave peculiar, sometimes random "feedback" responses regarding the buyers and sellers he transacts with, such as:
# Payment received within 3 hours via delivery monkey. Monkey wanted a tip though.
# fast shipment, I will use this new camera lens to set ants on fire!
# Paid quick! Please don't use this mp3 player to steal from the RIAA!
# Once left, I cannot edit or retract this feedback. So thank you for paying me.
# This guy's fast payment saved my marriage.
# This guy paid me with PayPal and my shoes fell off. I'm sad, yet happy. Wow.
# Item arrived so fast that my head spun. I am in the hospital now. Thanks Jenny.
# This book had a lot of words in it. I read almost all of them.
# Nothing says "I love you" like pirate Lego men!
# I now know exactly how to win friends and influence people. THANK YOU!
# You wacky British people, always buying things from me!
# No words to describe buyer. They should've sent a poet. So beautiful.
# Hope you don't mind the bits of porn I spliced in, Tyler Durden style.
# Does your Ebay name refer to a long-stemmed ceremonial tobacco pipe?
# Don't let the hat fool you, man, the Pope's a crazy farker!
# You bought a Socket Rocket from me. Doesn't that sound pornographic?
# Man oh man oh man oh man oh man! MAN! You know what I mean?
#I'm leaving you positive feedback so you better leave some for me too or else.
# 9 out of 10 doctors recommend products that they're paid to recommend.
# Good buyer, if you like buyers like that. I'm not saying I do. But he's good.
# Isn't it weird how sometimes you forget to put on your shoes when you wake up?
# Seller paid me so fast that I question his sanity.
# The way I see it, if you're gonna build a time machine, do it with some style.
Lost In Translation
As a Christmas gift a friend received an alarm clock packaged with almost incomprehensible directions. For example, what many people know as the "snooze alarm" function was described by the instructions as "Embezzling Sleep." But this is funnier!
January 24, 2005
Bad Weather Forecast
There are bad weather forecasts, and then there is possibly the worst weather forecast ever, here.
Another Bumper Sticker
You can buy one of these (or select from many others) here.
Bush Apparently Down on Upward Bound
Today's Chronicle of Higher Education reports:
"President Bush may propose eliminating funds next year for two popular programs that help needy students prepare for college, in an effort to finance an expansion of his signature No Child Left Behind law to high-school students, higher-education advocates told The Chronicle last week.
"The college-access programs, Upward Bound and Talent Search, have a combined budget of $460-million and serve a total of about 455,000 students and veterans. While Mr. Bush's proposal will not be certain until he releases his 2006 budget in early February, reports of the potential cuts have alarmed advocates of Upward Bound and Talent Search, which are part of the federal TRIO programs for disadvantaged students. ....
"....the shift will also affect the more than 5,000 participants in Veterans Upward Bound, which serves veterans with low incomes or who are the first in their families to attend college. Currently, 45 institutions receive grants to provide veterans, from the Vietnam War to the war in Iraq, with classroom instruction, career counseling, and help with applications for college and for financial aid...."
January 23, 2005
Bartow on Saletan on Summers
I had a pretty bad feeling about William Saletan's article about Larry Summers at Slate.com when I read the title: "Don't Worry Your Pretty Head." Readers can make up their own minds about the merits of his defense of Summers, but the end of the piece really made me angry. Saletan wrote:
"Already Summers is being forced to apologize, in the style of a Communist show trial, for sending "an unintended signal of discouragement to talented girls and women." But the best signal to send to talented girls and boys is that science isn't about respecting sensitivities. It's about respecting facts. The only people who don't belong in science, male or female, are those who would rather close their eyesand yoursthan see what's there."
Who exactly is forcing Summers to do anything? And "in the style of a Communist show trial" no less? If a group of feminists has that kind of power over Summers, why don't they similarly "force" him to hire more qualified women? "It's about respecting facts," writes Saletan, but what he really seems to be saying is, "It's about respecting the staus quo power structure, you dumb girls."
How I wish feminists had the power people like Saletan instrumentally credit us with when it suits their purposes. Better to blame the evil feminists than to entertain the frightening-to-Saletan possibility that a lot of people across genders and ideologies seem to strongly disagree with Summers' actions. Better to call the feminists "censors," in the hope that this shuts them up...
January 22, 2005
On the Narrow Gender Differences in Math
Crooked Timber links to a study that shows gender differences in math are statistically negligible.
Hook 'Em
Life doesn't present too many opportunities to tweak Siva and Bush simultaneously but thanks to Echidne of the Snakes, here is one! According to this report:
"President Bushs Hook em, horns salute got lost in translation in Norway, where shocked people interpreted his hand gesture during his inauguration as a salute to Satan." Thats what it means in the Nordics when you throw up the right hand with the index and pinky fingers raised, a gesture popular among heavy metal groups and their fans in the region.
Shock greeting from Bush daughter, a headline in the Norwegian Internet newspaper Nettavisen said above a photograph of Bushs daughter Jenna, smiling and showing the sign.
For Texans, the gesture is a sign of love for the University of Texas Longhorns, whose fans are known to shout out Hook em, horns! at sporting events.
Bush, a former Texas governor, and his family made the sign to greet the Longhorn marching band as it passed during the inaugural parade through Washington during Thursdays festivities, Norways largest newspaper, Verdens Gang, explained to its readers.
Now, my employing institution, the University of South Carolina, has a much more wholesome cheer - "Go Cocks!"
January 21, 2005
Where Fake Dinosaurs and Real Creationists Meet
Here is the website for "Dinosaur Adventure Land, The Place Where Dinosaurs and the Bible Meet!" Counterintuitively, the theme park boasts a "Science Center."
Both Powells Out?
Michael Powell is reported to be resigning from the FCC. Funniest commentary on same so far from Pandagon: "I Would Say Whee, But It's A $250 Fine." Hope it's not indecent to be "pithy."
Bush Gnome
If you put this in your garden, birds might poop on it! Via Pen-Elayne.
Shiny Shiny Lipstick
Buying this would be an interesting way to support UNICEF!
Bill Gates Back In The Day
Bill Gates Strikes a Pose for Teen Beat Photospread, 1983
From Neowin.net (two more equally disturbing photos at link!)
Dobson = Satan?
One of the NYT's "most e-mailed" stories yesterday was an account of the allegations by James Dobson (of "Focus on the Family") that the cartoon character SpongeBob Squarepants appeared in a "pro-homosexual" video that would be used for "manipulating and potentially brainwashing kids."
James Wolcott reacted as follows: "I hereby decree that Dr. James Dobson--founder of Focus on the Family; man of faith; fanatic; fool--be hereby known throughout the land as SpongeDob Stickypants."
Today, CNN has a story with the headline: "Christians issue gay warning on SpongeBob video" which states in pertinent part: "...at least two Christian activist groups say the innocent cartoon characters are being exploited to promote the acceptance of homosexuality." Dobson, according to the CNN article, objects to the idea of a "tolerance pledge" that asks people to respect the sexual identity of others along with their abilities, beliefs, culture and race, because it "crosses a moral line." Right-o, it crosses into the sphere of actual morality, a terrritory unfamilar and frightening to the likes of Dobson.
Dobson is clearly a publicity seeking bigot, but why does the NYT think his idiotic blathering is "news"? I understand why the article got e-mailed around by NYT readers so much, especially yesterday, because it confirms one's worst suspicions about Dobson, who seems to have so much influence with Bush, and validates the enormous contemptuous disgust we may feel for both Dobson and Bush. But I don't undertand why the NYT thought the "story" was so important.
And then there is the matter of CNN morphing Dobson and one seconding SpongeDob-wannabe into "Christians." I don't care what they call themselves, there is nothing about their actions that is even remotely in the spirit of Christ.
addendum: The Moderate Liberal notes that in Colorado there is a popular bumpersticker that reads: "Focus On Your Own Damn Family."
January 19, 2005
It's Going To Be A Long Day...
Huh?
Maybe I am just grumpy about the inauguration, but isn't this one of the dumber headlines of recent days?
Poll: Nation split on Bush as uniter or divider
Read the whole insipid article here if you have the stomach for it.
Germain Greer Rocks
Germaine Greer's Orwellian Ordeal on 'Big Brother'
By SARAH LYALL in the 1/20/05 NYT
LONDON, Jan. 19 - Possibly the only thing more surprising than the news that Germaine Greer - the Australian feminist, literary scholar and cultural critic - had joined the cast of the latest "Celebrity Big Brother" series was what she did when she quit, five days later.
Contestants habitually complain about their experiences on reality television shows. It is one of the standard features of the entertainment, like groveling for meals or getting drunk and falling over. But the complaints are usually directed at the other participants. As one said about another in a past season, "If I had stayed in that house a minute longer, I would have murdered Les."
What made the 65-year-old Ms. Greer's departure last week so riveting, by contrast, was that her attack was not a personal whining session, but a blistering cultural and literary critique of the show that revealed her as perhaps the only contestant who has ever actually read (or at least admitted reading) George Orwell's "Nineteen Eighty-Four," where the whole notion of Big Brother was born.
Ms. Greer, still best known for her 1970's feminist manifesto, "The Feminine Mystique," [correction: "The Female Eunuch"] compared the show, in which celebrities are confined together as viewers decide who goes and who stays, to "a fascist prison camp" where bullying was encouraged and sensory deprivation used as a weapon of torture.
Read the rest at the NYT site!
Michael Berube on the Harvard Presidency
Full piece here:
Traditionally, presidents of Harvard have been men, said Harvard geneticist Charles Kinbote, the studys designer and principal investigator. Now, after almost 400 years, we know why. To coin a phrase, its in the genes.
According to Kinbote, the presidency of Harvard University requires a unique array of talents and dispositions which, statistically, only a small handful of women possess. For one thing, noted Kinbote, it has long been one of the presidents tasks to deny tenure to promising female scholars-- personally, without stated cause, and after a department, a college, and a battery of external referees has approved her. My study shows that the X chromosome contains material that, in combination with another X chromosome, inhibits a persons ability to do this.
Men are also more adept than women at mentally rotating three-dimensional shapes on aptitude tests, Kinbote added. Youd be surprised how often a university president needs to do this, and at Harvard the pressure is especially intense. Kinbote estimated that the president of Harvard spends roughly one-quarter of the working day mentally rotating complex, hypothetical three-dimensional shapes, and thats not even counting all the time he needs to try to figure out why women arent as skilled at abstract mathematical thought.
Review of "Bury the Chains"
A brief review of Adam Hochschild's "Bury the Chains," can be found at Salon.com here as part of an interview with the author. Below is an excerpt:
"One of the great pleasures of reading history is being introduced to a new date, a day in the life of the past that helped shape who we are today. Adam Hochschild's new book, "Bury the Chains: Prophets and Rebels in the Fight to Free an Empire's Slaves," begins on May 22, 1787, when a dozen men met in a printing shop in London. They were trying to figure out how to persuade the rest of the country that slavery, a system that had been the norm for hundreds of years, was morally wrong. The meeting marked the beginning of British abolitionism, the first real human rights campaign and what would become the template for the activist movements that followed it. There was no precedent for what they set out to do, and yet, within 51 years, this group managed to eradicate slavery from the largest colonial empire in the world.
"Hochschild chronicles the movement over that half-century, from the printing shop meeting to the eve of emancipation, when a group of slaves in Jamaica threw their shackles into a coffin and, quite literally, buried the chains. Between these events were spirited fights in Parliament and pamphleteering campaigns and lectures to edify the public. There was the first real mass boycott (excluding the Boston Tea Party), in which women employed in the domestic realm refused to buy slave-grown sugar, and fringe religious movements challenged the authority of the (slave-owning) Church of England. Add to this the waves of bloody slave revolts in the West Indies, and you begin to have a series of events of which Alexis de Tocqueville pronounced: "If you pore over the histories of all peoples, I doubt you will find anything more extraordinary."
"Bury the Chains" starts by marveling at that extraordinariness and then setting to the task of uncovering the hows and whys of it, focusing the story on the key activists involved. But the process of abolition, Hochschild writes, was "a ragged and untidy epic," and his book reflects that untidiness. Teeming with anecdotes and incidents in several countries, filled with characters who pop up for a few paragraphs only to disappear from the story until years later, "Bury the Chains" isn't the smoothest read, but it is amazingly thorough. Rather than simply inform, Hochschild makes it his duty to impress upon the reader just how many people, ideas and tactics the abolition movement needed to be successful. It's a worthy reminder of the effort it takes to change the world."
Love Spuds
From the Museum of Food Anomalies. If you are bored or procrastinating, see also the Circus of Disembowled Plush Toys.
Darth Tater
If this is for real, satire is on life supprt...
Too Bizarre Not To Blog
Speaker Touts Stripping to 8th Graders
By BILEN MESFIN
SAN FRANCISCO -- The principal of a Palo Alto middle school may not invite a popular speaker back to an annual career day after he told girls they could earn a good living as strippers. Management consultant William Fried told eighth-graders at Jane Lathrop Stanford Middle School on Tuesday that stripping and exotic dancing can pay $250,000 or more per year, depending on their bust size. "It's sick, but it's true," Fried said in an interview later. "The truth of the matter is you can earn a tremendous amount of money as an exotic dancer, if that's your desire."
Fried has given a popular 55-minute presentation, "The Secret of a Happy Life," at the school's career day the past three years. He counsels students to experiment with a variety of interests until they discover something they love and excel in. But school principal Joseph Di Salvo said Fried may not be back next year. The principal said Fried's comments to the class came after some of them asked him to expand on why he included "exotic dancing" on his list of 140 potential careers. Fried spent about a minute answering questions, defining strippers and exotic dancers synonymously. According to Jason Garcia, 14, he told students: "For every 2 inches up there, you should get another $50,000 on your salary."
"A couple of students egged him and he took it hook, line and sinker," said Di Salvo, who also said the students took advantage of a substitute teacher overseeing the session. "It's totally inappropriate," Di Salvo said. "It's not OK by me. I would want my presenters to kind of understand that they are coming into a career day for eighth-graders."
That stripping advice wasn't the only thing that riled parents. Di Salvo said one mother said she was outraged when her son announced that he was forgoing college for a field he loves: fishing. "He really focused on finding what you really love to do," said Mariah Cannon, 13. Fried, 64, said he does not think he offended any of the students: "Eighth-grade kids are not dumb," he said. "They are pretty worldly."
January 18, 2005
Law Review Believe It Or Not
So a book review of Lessig's Free Culture just published in the Virginia Law Review starts out: "Over the past five years, Stanford Law School Professor Lawrence Lessig has published no fewer than three books expounding the claim that innovation and creativity are under ferocious assault from powerful corporate and political interests." And then a few sentences later the reviewer, UVA Law Prof. Julia Mahoney, accuses *Lessig* of "ratchet[ing] up his already heated rhetoric...." Sheesh.
And here is a sentence out of her conclusion: "...Lessig has opted to tell a dark, sweeping tale of a nation that for most of its history adjusted to societal and technological change with ease, but now teeters on the edge of the abyss of corporate control." I am reminded of a classic line from late monologist Brother Theodore: "I have looked into the abyss, and the abyss has looked into me, and neither of us liked what we saw." Brother Theodore labelled what he did "stand-up tragedy."
Cows With Guns
Bad puns, cheesy animation and revolting animals! Here!
Blank Check of the People
Great cartoon by August J. Pollack lampooning Bush here.
January 17, 2005
Freeway Blogging
Try it on Thursday! Learn more here.
Fox Fears FCC Over Naked Cartoon Heinie
Surreal but apparently true, from CNN:
FCC fears force Fox to pixelate cartoon nudity
LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- "Fox says it covered up the naked rear end of a cartoon character recently because of nervousness over what the Federal Communications Commission will find objectionable.
The latest example of TV network self-censorship because of FCC concerns came a few weeks ago during a rerun of a "Family Guy" cartoon. Fox electronically blurred a character's posterior, even though the image was seen five years ago when the episode originally aired.
"We have to be checking and second-guessing ourselves now," Fox entertainment president Gail Berman said Monday. "We have to protect our affiliates."
Fox hadn't gotten any complaints about the cartoon. But the move follows the FCC's decision in October to fine 169 Fox stations $7,000 each for airing an episode of "Married By America" that showed people licking whipped cream from strippers' bodies and a man in his underwear being spanked by strippers.
"It's certainly confusing when you have to do something like that," Berman said. "It's just that we were trying to find our way and do what's responsible."
At PBS, executives said this weekend they will edit out a glimpse of a naked woman in a fictional account of a terrorist "dirty bomb" attack that will air next month after being shown first on HBO."
Stone Court on Summers' Views Of Women
See the whole thing here, excerpt below:
According to the Boston Globe, the first point Summers touched on was the reluctance or inability of women who have children to work 80-hour weeks. The second point was that fewer girls than boys have top scores on science and math tests in late high school years. Summers' third point addressed discrimination. Summers noted that if discrimination was the main factor limiting the advancement of women in science and engineering, then a school that does not discriminate would gain an advantage by hiring away the top women who were discriminated against elsewhere.
Because that doesn't seem to be a widespread phenomenon, Summers said, according to the Globe, "the real issue is the overall size of the pool, and it's less clear how much the size of the pool was held down by discrimination."
Let's see if I follow that reasoning. Widespread discrimination against women in the sciences cannot exist, because economic theory says it would be inefficient, and someone would exploit those inefficiencies, making it go away. That's a familiar theory that you'll hear from someone who's finished Econ. 101 and now understands everything, but it's not what you'd expect from the President of Harvard. The problem with that theory is that, if you believe it, it would prove that there's never been discrimination against anyone, anywhere, which is clearly not the case, and as I understand economics you have to change your theory when it doesn't explain the data. Or you can just make up data. From the Boston Globe piece:
In his talk, according to several participants, Summers also used as an example one of his daughters, who as a child was given two trucks in an effort at gender-neutral parenting. Yet she treated them almost like dolls, naming one of them "daddy truck," and one "baby truck."
Oh, OK, well that settles it, doesn't it? Summers taught macroenomics back in the day -- but I bet he didn't know that my eight year old would rather have $1.00 today than $1.10 in a year, so I hope he isn't still wasting his breath on the time value of money.
Harvard President Opines on Gender Differences
From today's NYT:
Harvard President Criticized for Comments on Women
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. (AP) -- The president of Harvard University prompted criticism for suggesting that innate differences between the sexes could help explain why fewer women succeed in science and math careers.
Lawrence H. Summers, speaking Friday at an economic conference, also questioned how great a role discrimination plays in keeping female scientists and engineers from advancing at elite universities.
The remarks prompted Massachusetts Institute of Technology biologist Nancy Hopkins -- a Harvard graduate -- to walk out on Summers' talk, The Boston Globe reported.
``It is so upsetting that all these brilliant young women (at Harvard) are being led by a man who views them this way,'' Hopkins said later.
Continue reading "Harvard President Opines on Gender Differences" »
Hold On To The Dream
"If we make the right choice, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our world into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. If we make the right choice, will be able to speed up the day, all over America and all over the world, when justice will roll down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream."
Martin Luther King, Jr., Beyond Vietnam, 4 April 1967
Hear clips of King's speeches here.
Read the text of the "I Have a Dream" speech here.
January 16, 2005
My Pet Fat
This time of year there are lots of advertisements for new weight-loss plans. I particularly love those Internet ads that promise "lose 10 pounds by clicking here" because who knew that using a mouse burned so many calories? But My Pet Fat sets a new standard of something, I'm not quite sure what.
Students for an Orwellian Society
Because 2005 is 21 years too late! Learn more here.
Heuristics
Great interactive illustration of "heuristics" here.
January 14, 2005
Bumper Stickers
January 13, 2005
WWJD Thong
Get one for your sweetie for Valentine's Day here. Unless I'm your sweetie, in which case, send chocolate.
Important New MS Windows Patch
Windows users should bang head on desk hard and then click here. Includes instructions on reverse-engineering the patch for open sourcers.
Trademark That Doesn't Translate
Probably too funny to be real, but who knows? Found at strangecosmos.com.
How To Make A Mouse-Driven Etch-A-Sketch
Instructions here, via 18 1/2 Minute Gap.
January 12, 2005
He Might Improvinate During His Second Term
January 11, 2005
Open Source Beer
Really. Click here.
Boobs of Justice
Credit Jesus' General for this one too..
Jesus' General Strikes Again
Original here.
Lego Thriller
Experience the subversive appeal of Michael Jackson's music, and those overpriced linking plastic blocks, here.
Meet the Foxblockers!
"How to Fox-proof Your Cable Box" from the NY Daily News:
Attention, blue-state parents. Are you worried about what your children are seeing on TV? Have you caught them ogling Ann Coulter and Sean Hannity as they engage in explicit acts of love with Bush administration policies? Now you can protect your little liberals from hard-core right-wing positions the same way you censor cable porn. For just $8.95, The FOXBlocker eliminates the risk of exposure to Fox News Channel.
Sam Kimery and Joshua Montgomery, who are marketing the device, say it employs the technology already used to filter adult content. And every time someone orders one of the gizmos from Foxblocker.com, Fox advertisers receive E-mail telling them that another consumer has just said no to Rupert Murdoch's brand of "fair and balanced news."
"We hope that companies will see people actually paying to block channels that won't offer alternative views, and then rethink how they spend their advertising dollars," Montgomery tells Variety V Life magazine.
Is Fox worried about this new product? "I mean, clearly, it's not working," a Fox News rep told us. "Our ratings continue to skyrocket."
IBM Open Sources Some Software Patents
I.B.M. to Give Free Access to 500 Patents, By Steve Lohr, in today's NYT:
I.B.M. plans to announce today that it is making 500 of its software patents freely available to anyone working on open-source projects, like the popular Linux operating system, on which programmers collaborate and share code.
The new model for I.B.M., analysts say, represents a shift away from the traditional corporate approach to protecting ownership of ideas through patents, copyrights, trademark and trade-secret laws. The conventional practice is to amass as many patents as possible and then charge anyone who wants access to them. I.B.M. has long been the champion of that formula. The company, analysts estimate, collected $1 billion or more last year from licensing its inventions.
....
I.B.M. executives said they hoped the company's initial contribution of 500 patents would be the beginning of a "patent commons," which other companies would join. I.B.M. has not yet approached other companies, Mr. Stallings said.
I.B.M. will continue to hold the 500 patents. But it has pledged to seek no royalties from and to place no restrictions on companies, groups or individuals who use them in open-source projects, as defined by the Open Source Initiative, a nonprofit education and advocacy group. The group's definition involves a series of policies allowing for free redistribution, publication of the underlying source code and no restrictions on who uses the software or how it is used.
Just how far I.B.M. intends to go in granting open access to its patents is uncertain. The 500 patents are a small slice of its corporate patent trove of more than 40,000 worldwide and 25,000 in the United States. In recent years, software patents have accounted for about half of the patents granted to I.B.M.
January 10, 2005
Photo Accompanying NYT Magazine Article About Fraternities
Photo and article available here.
Music-Related Copyrights
I don't think anyone has ever asked me whether quoting short excerpts of written works is potentially copyright infringing, but thanks to "sampling" jurisprudence and the rhetoric of recording companies and the RIAA, I get lots of questions about using music clips. Tonight I was asked by a neighbor whether her 13 year old son could legally use brief portions of jazz recordings in a multimedia history project he is working on for school. She had already asked the Dean of the University of South Carolina's School of Music, and wanted my input as well, because she was still nervous about the issue. Certain actors have convinced the public that music-related copyrights are really, really powerful.
Recruiting New Soldiers With Money
"Targeting Teens for Troops," by Bill Hendrick. Full text here, except below:
Every day, squads of recruiters in impressively crisp uniforms cozy up to kids as young as 14 and 15 at schools, malls, pizza joints, bowling alleys and other teen hangouts, letting them know about the program, which allows anyone 17 or older to join and be paid monthly before they do a single push-up or hear a grizzled drill sergeant yell "double time."
The Georgia Guard has about 80 recruiters who operate out of 77 locations, targeting every high school in the state. No surprise, success has been greatest in schools where pupils come from middle and lower socioeconomic groups. The sergeants first get permission, then stalk campus grounds and school halls and make presentations, looking mostly for kids who are not headed to college and those who want to go but doubt they'll be able to afford it. ....
Money is the biggest incentive. A new private with no training can draw at least $159 per monthly meeting, and $597 for 15 days of summer camp. Promotions are doled out after basic, when monthly pay increases. A junior going to basic before senior year could easily earn $2,400 while training, then go back to school in the fall and earn higher pay for monthly drills, plus still more the next summer in AIT (advanced individual training). Unless mobilized, the youths can earn a hefty nest egg, then go to college or trade school on the Guard's dime.
For those youngsters who have no desire to go to college, recruiters explain that the Guard offers training in more than 200 fields. The Georgia Guard also promises to pay full tuition to any state college or technical school. And the tuition spigot can be turned on as soon as a youngster finishes basic training.
Hobson, for example, figures to earn $5,000 this summer attending 16 weeks of basic and AIT, then go to college, with her tuition paid by the Guard. "I could be mobilized, but probably not, so I'm planning for college," she says. Many go to basic training after their junior year, then AIT after graduation. "When you tell a kid he can come off the block and make money, they are like, "What?' " says recruiter Simmons. "They can earn a lot more than they could in a regular teen job. Most are in the hunt for college money." ....
January 3, 2005
Georgia Prisons Put Female Prisoners on Diets
Associated Press story here (in Rome, Georgia News Tribune) and below:
ATLANTA Fast-food restaurants arent the only places getting health-conscious these days. Georgias prisons are, too. The state Department of Corrections is restricting the average number of calories female prisoners may consume on a daily basis to 2,472 a 20 percent reduction from the previous limit. However, the policy, introduced in late summer, doesnt affect male inmates who still get an average of 3,050 calories a day. Some lawmakers and civil libertarians object to the policy, saying it amounts to discrimination.
Im a little taken aback by this, said Debbie Seagraves, executive director of the American Civil Liberties Union of Georgia. Calorie intake is just not standard from one person to the next, so to just by a standard decrease the available food to women because they are women does sound to me like discrimination.
They also say the policy is unfair to some female inmates who may be larger or more active than others. Prison officials downplayed the criticism. Its for their own benefit ... for healthier inmates, said Henry Brooks, deputy warden of security at Metro State Prison in Atlanta. The National Academy of Science recommends roughly 2,200 calories per day for teenage girls and active women. It suggests 2,800 calories for teenage boys and active men.
Thanks to Big Fat Blog for the link.
Bill O'Reilly Named Misinformer of the Year
Media Matters named Bill O'Reilly "Misinfomer of the Year," an impressive feat given the competition. Below are his Top Ten Most Outrageous Comments of 2004:
1. O'Reilly falsely claimed Bush didn't oppose 9-11 Commission. O'Reilly defended President George W. Bush from a Kerry-Edwards '04 TV ad highlighting Bush's opposition to creation of the 9-11 Commission by denying that Bush had ever opposed the commission. In fact, Bush did oppose the creation of the 9-11 Commission. (10/21/04)
2. O'Reilly falsely claimed Iraq had ricin. O'Reilly responded to a caller to his radio show by defending the Iraq war: "They did have ricin up there in the north -- so why are you discounting that so much?" In fact, the Duelfer report (the final report of the Iraqi Survey Group, led by Charles A. Duelfer, which conducted the search for weapons in Iraq following the U.S.-led invasion) indicates that Iraq did not have ricin. (10/19/04)
Continue reading "Bill O'Reilly Named Misinformer of the Year" »
Things Fafnir Will Not Do The Next Time He Lives Through 2004
Send Santa letters to the President.
Send Santa letters to Secret Service agents replying to the Santa letters to the President.
More here.
Procrastination
Click here now so you won't have to do it after you get your stuff done.
Salon's 2005 Predictions About the Google Library
Salon.com futuristically predicts Google will delete its electronic library...
Just weeks after announcing ambitious plans to digitize millions of books from five major libraries, Google burns down its electronic Alexandria before even really starting it.
The problem isn't the anticipated copyright headaches. It's the readers -- or lack thereof.
"When news of our plans broke, we were flooded with e-mails from college students begging us to make more term papers available, not books," says a Google executive who asked not to be named. "The kids told us that they have plenty of access to books on paper that they don't read. What they really need is someone to do the reading, thinking and writing for them."
Convinced that absolutely no one wants to read most of the tomes they'd just begun digitizing, Google decides to divert the tens of millions designated for the book project into hiring underemployed Ph.D.'s to build up the world's biggest virtual term-paper library.
Weather Related Conspiracy Theories
I don't endorse or dismiss this, just thought I'd post the link and let those who are interested make up their own minds. Click here.
Questioning Authority
Form 22C for Questioning Authority, by the Covert Comic, available here, but remember, after you question authority, authority may have a few questions for you!
More on the Napsterization of Lynne Cheney
From World O'Crap we learn more about: ...Sisters, Lynne's 1981 novel which Newsweek described as "a steamy bodice-ripper set in the 19th-century American West, featuring vivid tales of whorehouses, attempted rapes, a suspicious murder and several lesbian love affairs, of which Cheney writes approvingly. "
Sisters was scheduled to be rereleased in April, but then Lynne's lawyers had the publisher killed (or something), and so the book remained suppressed. And every time it's put on the web, the lawyers seem to find out, and then the website is never seen again (nor is the author of the website).
But Frederick of BeatBushBlog has uncovered a source if you want a download of this throughly researched novel, poorly written novel -- let's hope that he and his confidential informant survive.
January 2, 2005
There's Just No Pleasing the Liberals
Typically insightful Tom Tomorrow 'toon here.
December 31, 2004
Happy New Year
Give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
December 30, 2004
Court Backs Firing of Bartender Who Didn't Wear Makeup
SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - A female bartender who refused to wear makeup at a Reno, Nevada, casino was not unfairly dismissed from her job, a U.S. federal appeals court ruled on Tuesday. Darlene Jespersen, who had worked for nearly 20 years at a Harrah's Entertainment Inc casino bar in Reno, Nevada, objected to the company's revised policy that required female bartenders, but not men, to wear makeup. A previously much-praised employee, Jespersen was fired in 2000 after the firm instituted a "Beverage Department Image Transformation" program and she sued, alleging sex discrimination.
Continue reading "Court Backs Firing of Bartender Who Didn't Wear Makeup" »
Create an E-Snowflake
Make-a-Flake here.
December 29, 2004
Huh?
Click here for the website of the world's most dynamic e-business marketing, design and consulting agency. They provide distinct clients with groundbreaking business strategies and cutting-edge designs to aggressively and creatively compete in an changing economy.
Their consulting ideas will entice and excite you. Their professional design solutions will give you the confidence to succeed. And their web site will make you think they know what they are doing.
Their name will confuse you, but, you have to admit, the logo design is pretty cool. And they are good at turning regular words into "e-words," such as "e-consulting," "e-business" or "e-sexual harrassment."
Their office is really modern and they've got nice computers and stuff. If you ever saw it, you'd say "Wow, cool office. These guys are legit."
Hmmm...
Something seems wrong about this.
North v. South Misunderstanding
So picture two friends walking around a small town in New York, ruefully noting all of the shuttered storefronts and general seediness of what was previously a lively, if downscale, main street. Having grown up there, and returned periodically to visit family, they had seen various businesses come and go, and so began naming the enterprises that had operated in particular locations - craft stores, jewelry stores, pizza parlors, a Woolworth's. The Southerner pointed to an empty building and the Northerner said, "That was a porn shop!"
"No," corrected the Southerner, "It was a hock shop."
"It was a porn shop, I remember distinctly," said the damn Yankee, confidently.
"It was a hock shop, a place where you could take your belongings and get cash for them," the Southerner replied forcefully, straining to remain gentile. Having grown up in New York, Southern politeness was not exactly second nature.
"Right, a PORN shop, P-A-W-N, porn!" shouted the North, triumphant again.
The Hallmark Reject Squishily Sentimental Entry
A relative died unexpectedly yesterday, and together with the unbelievable scale of the earthquake/tsunami tragedy, I've been thinking a lot about the fragility of life. At the risk of sounding like a cloying, insipid greeting card, it is so important to recognize and appreciate the good things and good people we are lucky enough to have around us. Think I'll go have a second helping of dessert, too! Wishing Siva and Melissa and anybody else reading this safe travels and lots of joy and laughter, which always seems to surface when most needed.
December 25, 2004
The Women in Blogging Reader
As written by Utopian Hell, reposted here because it *so* deserves to be read:
It is time once again to step back and look at that subject we love to hate: Women in Blogging. For those of you keeping score at home, about once every three months someone brings up the question on his blog (Ive yet to see a woman do this) as to why there arent more women blogging about X. The conversation spills on and on into page after page of comments, all of which hash over the same points.
So, as a public service to every progressive male out there that suddenly decides he needs to address the reason why his progressive web site is run by white men, or why he doesnt link to many women, Ive put together this reader. In it, you will find all of the arguments used, and all of the excuses painted as to why there arent more women bloggers. Please, if you feel the need to rehash this issue yet again, follow the reader and come up with something new.
After reading through countless comment threads and watching how this argument flows, Ive managed to knock it down to five basic categories of reasons. If you have something that Ive missed, please feel free to leave it in a comment.
Interest
Women arent interested in X.
Women dont write about X enough on their blogs.
Women dont create blogs that are single-topic.
Womens issues arent talked about enough in politics.
Anonymous Lawyer
NYT article about the Anonymous Lawyer blog available here, excerpt below:
....Hilarious, poignant, maddening (even the readers chide one another for their high-priced whining), the blog, which began appearing in March, has become an anonymous, online 24-hour confessional for disaffected associates at large, elite law firms around the country. (Many comments are posted late at night when, presumably, the readers are still at the firm.) ....
For his course on the law firm as a business organization, Professor Henderson cites Anonymous Lawyer quoting an early morning e-mail message from an associate: "I just gave birth to a daughter this morning at 4:13 a.m. So I will not be at the office today. I will be checking my BlackBerry throughout the day, so feel free to let me know if you need anything.
Anonymous Donors Thwart Censorship
Bush Monkey Picture Shown on Giant Billboard
NEW YORK (Reuters) - A portrait of President Bush using monkeys to form his image that was banished from a New York art show last week amid charges of censorship was projected on a giant billboard in Manhattan on Tuesday. "Bush Monkeys," a small acrylic on canvas by Chris Savido, created the stir last week at the Chelsea Market public space, leading the market's managers to close down the 60-piece show.
Animal Magazine, a quarterly arts publication that had organized the month-long show, said anonymous donors had paid for the picture to be posted on a giant digital billboard over the entrance to the Holland Tunnel, used by thousands of commuters traveling between Manhattan and New Jersey.
The original picture will be auctioned on eBay, with part of the proceeds donated to parents of U.S. soldiers wishing to supply their sons and daughters with body armor in Iraq. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld came under fire from soldiers in Kuwait earlier this month who complained that they had to use scrap metal to armor their vehicles.
"Many of my friends are over in Iraq," Savido said in a statement. The painting offers a likeness of Bush but the image is made up of monkeys swimming in a marsh. It was originally priced at $3,500 in the show's catalog. Organizers expect more than 400,000 drivers to see the billboard each day for the next month.
Season's Greetings From Landover Baptist!
If you are a Betty Bowers fan, you'll love her "Christmas Letters to Laura Bush" column available here.
December 24, 2004
If You Celebrate Christmas, Hope It's Merry!
Warmest wishes for peace on earth, and goodwill toward all!
December 21, 2004
Wal-Mart Moral Values
Heads up for last minute holiday shoppers: You can buy guns at Wal-mart, but not books by George Carlin or Jon Stewart.
Cool Blue Ambrotoon
Find other great cartoons by John X. Ambrosavage here!
You Left A Note On My Car
From LAist. Honk if you suspect it has something to do with Los Angeles.
Police Knotty Dah
"Police Knotty Dah" was an excercise in unintentionally parodic musical artistic license by a neighorhood child, sung to the tune of "Feliz Navidad." If you want to hear an even more nontraditional holiday song, click here. Warning: Cuss words. And here is a song about curling, the sport - cool, eh? Both songs via Evil Hippy.
Girl Guitars
The Daisy Rock Company seems to have found an attractive market niche with "girl guitars," which I find kind of depressing. Girls don't need "special" guitars, but obviously some girls want them.
The Destruction of Christmas
Body and Soul reports "destroying Christmas is way down at the bottom of my To Do list. Today I'm baking gingerbread and helping to sandpaper and paint the salt dough stars, and tomorrow, I still have some wrapping to do. At the rate I'm going, I won't have time to destroy Christmas at least until Sunday, and by then, what's the point? The siege will just have to wait until next year."
December 20, 2004
It Takes All Kinds
You might think an airline barf bag collection would be sort of dull, and you'd be right, but the commentary at this site is sort of funny...
Chanukah Push Back
Parody called "The Jewish Hey Ya" here!
Beatles' Christmas Messages 1963-69
Available for listening and downloading here, site found via A Moveable Beast.
Fafblog's Man of the Year
Other looney subversiveness also available at fafblog!
Jesus H. Christ-mas
"All over the country, Christmas is taking flak," [Bill] O'Reilly recently announced, as he complained about "the anti-Christmas jihad" that's gripping the nation. "If they could, secularists would cancel Christmas as a holiday. That's how much they fear the exposition of the philosophy of Jesus."
I don't actually know what a "secularist" is, but maybe that is because there aren't any in South Carolina. Every store I go into is chock full of Christmas decorations, as are the homes and yards of many of my friends and neighbors. There are fair numbers of Jews and Pagans and Muslims and Buddhists and Hindus and Athiests and other "not-Christians" here, but they don't seem at all fearful of "the philosophy of Jesus," though I bet many find Bill O'Reilly a tad alarming, I know I do.
The South Carolina State House has a giant illuminated Christmas tree in the front yard, right next to the Confederate Flag.
Flickr, the Friendster of Photo Sites
Article about Flickr by Katharine Mieszkowski at Salon.com, here is an excerpt:
"Flickr is one of many photo-sharing sites, including, but not limited to, Fotolog, Fotothing, Zoto, Fotki, Smugmug and Pbase. Smugmug enjoyed a moment of fame in early December when the Navy launched an investigation into photos that surfaced on the site that apparently depicted Navy SEALs torturing Iraqi prisoners.
"On most sites, you create your own album or page of photos, and invite your friends to look at them. But on Flickr, you can mingle all your photos with similar images, creating an endlessly beguiling cross-pollination of photos that spark a host of unique communities.
"Flickr allows its more than 176,000 members to meet each other through both images and words in an ever-evolving visual playground. The onslaught of images that appear on the site range from the truly artistic to the bluntly documentary, a pool of more than 2.2 million photos that's growing at the rate of about 30,000 a day. What's unique is that 82 percent of the pictures on the site are publicly available to anyone who cares to look at them and riff off them. Members can keep their photos private, shared only with a specified group of intimates, but most choose not to, allowing the pictures of their cat or car to freely commingle with others."
December 19, 2004
Floating Logos
Home page is here, image array here. The project statement is as follows:
"The Floating Logos project is inspired by signs perched high atop very tall poles so that they may be viewed from a long distance away. When standing next to these poles, the signs loom over us in such a way that we must crane our necks to see them. The elimination of the poles helps to accentuate the ominous feeling of being beneath these signs as well as serve to disconnect the signs from the ground and reality. The ground is purposefully left out of these images in order to emphasize the disconnect, but hints of terra firma are included in the forms of trees, wires, light poles, buildings and other land-based objects. The floating effect is intended to give the signs a supernatural quality that is meant to call attention to the hegemonic role consumerism and advertising play in our society."
Biker Santa
In December of 2001 I put a large lighted peace sign in front of my house, which I had constructed out of blue rope lights, a hula hoop, and plenty of craft wire. It was my statement about the impending war with Iraq, which I stupidly thought there was still some small hope of avoiding. My neighbors didn't like my holiday display much, and one asked, "What does a peace sign have to do with Christmas?" Wonder if the folks with Biker Santa in their yard get similar questions.
Pagan Claus
Pagan Claus, A Look At Christmas Symbols, by W.J. Bethancourt III
Excerpt below:
"December 25th occurs about the time of the Winter Solistice, the shortest day of the year. The shortening days were taken as a sign that the Sun was getting weaker. After the Solistice, the days begin to get longer ...... and pagan peoples thought that was an indication that the Sun was getting stronger.
"Thus, the Winter Solistice became the "birthday" of several gods: Attis, Frey, Thor, Dionysus, Osiris, Adonis, Mithra, Tammuz, Cernunnos and so forth. It is a "solar holiday," marking the time that the sun becomes apparently stronger day by day.
"Mithra, by the way, was born on December 25, of a virgin. His birth was witnessed by shepherds and magicians [magi]. Mithra raised the dead and healed the sick and cast out demons. He returned to heaven at the spring equinox and before doing so had a last supper with his 12 disciples (representing the 12 signs of the zodiac), eating mizd, a piece of bread marked with a cross (an almost universal symbol of the sun). Any of that sound familiar?"
Conflicting Reasons for the Season
I always find law students with some background of academic "religious studies" open to the idea that personal values can be a driving force in the development of the law, which makes them more fun to teach, and also, in my view, better lawyers. Even a cursory overview of the tensions, rivalries and splits in the various denominations of Protestantism suggests how unlikely it is there will ever be a coherent, consensus based view of "Christian Law." As one example of things educated people should know but often don't, the article below neatly explains the evolution of Christmas as something less than biblically ordained.
From the London Times: The Arrival of Santa, by Carl Muller
In Europe today, a revolt is being staged against the "Americanization" of Christmas. The trouble is that there is still a lot of to-and-fro natter about the true origins of the festival ever since the Puritans emphasised that there is no true date. In their efforts to deny the legitimacy of the celebration, they insisted that no one could pinpoint the exact day of Christ's birth!
We are told that the shepherds were staying in their fields overnight when Jesus was born (Luke 2:8) - but this makes a December birth unlikely, since it is far too cold to sleep out at night at that time of the year. Scholars think it likely that Christ was born in the spring, but the first Christmas of the Church was officially celebrated in 356 AD, when Pope Julius I fixed Jesus' birthday at December 25, calling it the Feast of the Nativity.
December 18, 2004
Snow Fight
Snow Fight! Definitely click on and process "define keys" before you play, because this game requires keyboard keys rather than mouse clicks. Credit Pen-Elayne.
Video Games and Gender
Here is a link to an idiotic NY Observer [NO] article about video games, and here is a link to Mouse Musings' [MM] reactions. Below are a few excerpts:
NO: Its not that all women reflexively hate video games, of course; many fondly remember Super Mario Brothers and Ms. Pac-Man, or the thrill of clobbering their brother at Tecmo Bowl. But its inescapable that men just like to play with gadgets more; its something about the thumbs.
MM: Since we know that men have thumbs and women don't, of course. Or is it that we can't manipulate a video game controller because we all have expensive manicures? I can't remember.
NO: Part of what keeps these guys playing the game to the point of nausea is simply that its hard; it actually requires skill, a weird kind of unlearnable skill. (Many a male noted sympathetically that girls simply dont have the studied hand-eye coordination that they do.)
MM: When it comes to this alien concept "fun", suddenly women are all thumbs. But don't forget, when it comes to cooking dinner, women indeed have better hand-eye coordination, since it developed in the caveman days when men were out killing big animals and women were at home doing the cavewoman version of needlework.
And here are a couple of comments the MM post attracted:
43% of video game players are female...More demos here: http://www.games-advertising.com/demographics.html
By Roxanne, at 16.12.04
Roxanne, what you're forgetting is that female gamers tend to be more scary than sexy...and since they aren't sexy, they aren't actually women.
By james d, at 16.12.04